Then, Now, Forever (Heartbeat #2)

by Teodora Kostova

  The last person to enter was a tall man, in an impeccably tailored suit. His graying hair was sleeked back away from his handsome face. He had an aura of power that made others pale into insignificance. Gia judged him to be in his late sixties, even though he moved with a much younger man’s grace.

  Gia would know that facial structure and graceful walk anywhere.

  Sergio Salvatore bore more than a striking resemblance to his dead brother, and consequently to Beppe. The moment his eyes adjusted to the darkness of the church compared to the sunshine outside, his eyes met Beppe’s and his lips parted into a genuine smile. The delight immediately reached his intelligent, dark eyes. He strode briskly towards them.

  “Dio mio! Giuseppe! You look exactly like Paolo did at your age!” Sergio exclaimed, still smiling. He picked up a startled Beppe by the upper arms and pulled him into a tight embrace. “I’m so glad you made it. Paolo spoke about you all the time, I feel like I know you already.” Sergio laughed deeply. Keeping his arm around Beppe’s shoulders he turned him around to stand by his side, rather than in front of him. Beppe was utterly speechless. Gia wasn’t sure what had shocked him into silence again. Was it Sergio’s resemblance to his grandfather? Or the fact that he’d just discovered he had an extended family who were happy to see him? Either way, two sets of similar black eyes stared at Gia –Beppe’s were frantic and confused, and Sergio’s were warm and curious.

  “Now, who’s this beautiful young lady here with you?” Sergio asked.

  Since Beppe didn’t or couldn't answer him, Gia rose to her feet gracefully, offering Sergio her hand and a smile.

  “Hello, Mr. Salvatore, I’m Gianna Selvaggio.” For some reason, Gia felt compelled to introduce herself with her full name, which she rarely did. Sergio’s whole demeanor emanated power, elegance and strength and she wanted to impress him.

  “Mr. Salvatore! Nonsense! Call me Sergio. If you’re here with Giuseppe, to support him during this difficult time, you’re family.” Instead of shaking her extended hand, Sergio let go of Beppe and enfolded her in his arms. His embrace was so comforting that it took a massive effort not to burst into tears. It was proving to be too much for her – Beppe’s petrified state; the church; the funeral; the scent of burning candles and flowers…

  “I’m so sorry for your loss, Sergio,” she managed to murmur in his arms, forcing the words through the lump rising in her throat. Sergio’s arms tightened before he released her as a silent acceptance of her condolences.

  “Come, let’s join everyone in the front. The service will start shortly.”

  Sergio confidently strode towards the altar, expecting Beppe and Gia to follow him. Beppe glanced back at the entrance as though he wanted to make a run for it.

  “Beppe, look at me,” Gia took his chin between her thumb and forefinger and tilted his head until their eyes met. “If you want to go, we’ll go. You don't owe anyone here anything. We’ll just walk out that door and send them flowers and an apology card.” Beppe blinked and some of the uncertainty and fear disappeared from his eyes. He wanted to do this, he just needed a bit of an encouragement. “But I know that if we do leave, you'll never forgive yourself for not saying goodbye and not making an effort to get to know your relatives.” Beppe nodded, some of the tension leaving his body, determination sharpening his features. “You’re the bravest, most compassionate and noble man I know, Giuseppe Orsino. I know you can do this.” Gia wrapped his hands in hers and rising on her tiptoes, placed a soft, tender kiss on Beppe’s lips. Her gentle kiss snapped him out of his stupor. Gia saw the shock slipping away from his eyes. Beppe’s gaze was once again the deep, warm, onyx that Gia knew and loved.

  With a nod and a small smile, he turned towards the altar tugging Gia along behind him. He led them to the front row and sat next to Sergio. The older man glanced sideways at them and with a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, patted Beppe’s knee right before the priest took his place and the service began.

  The service was heart-warming. The priest didn’t read lengthy passages of the Bible or lecture them about life and death. He’d known Paolo personally and shared his memories of him, eliciting laughter and a few tears from the people gathered in the church. Half way through the service Gia looked around and noticed that it had filled to overflowing. Paolo must have been well loved and respected in this community that had only really known him for three short years.

  Many of those gathered took turns to speak about Paolo. It was obvious by the fondness with which they spoke that he’d indeed been loved and would be greatly missed. Sergio spoke as well, relaying stories about them as children. As he finished his eyes darkened and grew harder. He was unable to share stories as adults because of their separation. Sergio had truly loved his brother and it was evident as he spoke that the decision to send him away weighed heavily on his conscious. The stubborn tilt of his chin however told Gia that even though he regretted not being with his brother during half his life, he did not regret keeping Paolo away from the family business.

  Nobody asked Beppe to speak and he didn’t volunteer. Even though he was handling the situation better, judging by the almost normal look in his eyes, he was still too overcome with sadness, too emotional to stand up in front of all those people and talk about his grandfather. For all his bravado and extrovert personality, Beppe was deeply private when it came to his true emotions. On some level a shy, quiet, and scared little boy was still living in him somewhere.

  When the service came to an end, the priest announced that the coffin would stay open for a few more hours so that people could say goodbye to Paolo if they wished. Some people got up to leave and others made their way to Paolo's casket to pay their last respects.

  “The family said their goodbyes yesterday. Stay as long as you need, Giuseppe. I’ll be waiting for you outside,” said Sergio. Patting Beppe’s knee again, he stood up and headed for the exit.

  Soon, the church was empty and it was just the two of them left inside. The silence was deafening. The scent of flowers and incense from the service made Gia want to rush outside so she could take deep cleansing breaths. She forced herself not to. She would not leave Beppe here, alone, even if it gave her nightmares for months to come.

  “Beppe?” she said gently, rubbing his arm soothingly, “Let’s get this over with, baby. I’ll come with you and hold your hand, just like I promised.”

  Beppe hesitated a moment, but then nodded and stood up. His grip on Gia’s hand was crushing. They walked to the altar and peered inside the open coffin.

  Paolo looked like he was asleep. His face was relaxed and peaceful as if he’d let out a loud snore any moment and wake up. It wasn’t as scary as Gia had imagined.

  Beppe stood right by Paolo, staring at his grandfather’s face. A single tear rolled down his cheek and Gia moved to wipe it away, just as she’d promised. Beppe glanced at her through glassy eyes, desperation and sadness rolling off him in waves. He returned his gaze to his grandfather and spoke for the first time since they’d entered the church.

  “Thank you,” he said, as his voice shook and he had to take a deep breath before continuing. “Thank you, Grandpa, for saving my life. I never told you before and I should have. I hope you can hear me. I want you to know that I’m truly thankful for everything you did for me. You were the best father I could have ever wished for.” Another tear slipped down his cheek, followed another until he was crying in earnest. Beppe blinked rapidly and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “I love you,” he said, before a sob escaped him and he turned to Gia, crushing her in a desperate embrace.

  They remained like that for several long agonizing moments. Gia could no longer hold back her own tears. She cried with her face buried in Beppe’s chest, her heart breaking once again for this beautiful, gentle, fragile man she so desperately loved.

  Beppe pulled away slightly, still keeping his arms around Gia. He gazed at her with an intensity and determination in his eyes that startled her. She thought she�
�d see grief but Beppe was looking at her as if his world had turned on its axis and he’d just had an epiphany.

  “I never said those things to him when he was alive and I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.” He inched his face closer to Gia’s until their lips almost touched. “I’m done being a coward.”

  He closed the remaining distance between them and joined their lips together in a ferocious kiss. Gia was vaguely aware of whimpering when Beppe thrust his tongue into her mouth, exploring and claiming every millimeter of it. She met him half-way, tangling her own tongue with his, sucking and biting his lips until her body screamed from lack of oxygen. There was nothing gentle about Beppe’s kiss – it was rough and possessive, and it weakened Gia’s knees.

  “Not here,” she managed to whisper when their mouths parted. Gia didn’t push Beppe away. His kiss was amazing and so incredibly right, but what was more – he needed her. At this moment Beppe needed to be close to Gia in a physical way so he could begin to cope with the pain.

  Gia knew what it felt like. She’s sought Beppe out for the same reason when her father died. She also knew that if she could take at least some of Beppe’s pain away, she’d do it in a heartbeat.

  Resting their foreheads together, they took deep breaths and attempted to calm down. Together they turned away from Paolo’s coffin and left the church behind.

  As they stepped into the sunshine hand in hand, the heat and humidity immediately assaulted their senses. Sergio was indeed waiting for them, leaning on his car’s back door.

  “Let’s go. Silvio will drive us to the house. The family can’t wait to meet you. They would have crowded you right there in the church if I hadn’t explicitly forbidden it,” said Sergio, smiling warmly at them. Beppe gave Gia a panicked look – he didn’t want to go to a house full of people he didn’t know. People that would gush over him for hours. Not now.

  “Thank you, Sergio, but we’ve got our own car and I think it would be best if we went back to our hotel,” Gia said, looking pointedly at Sergio, trying to convey through her eyes how fragile Beppe was at this moment.

  “Car? Hotel? Dio mio! I will not have Paolo’s grandson staying in a hotel and renting a car!” He bit out the word hotel as if it was a curse and seemed genuinely distressed by the fact that they had, if unintentionally, distanced themselves from his family.

  “Sergio, please,” Gia said, letting go of Beppe’s hand and moving closer to Sergio. “He needs some space right now. Putting him in a room full of people he doesn’t know is not a good idea.” Gia must have managed to sound authoritative and way more confident than she felt because Sergio’s eyes softened in understanding. He probably remembered Beppe’s blank stare when he first met him today. Sicilians might be comfortable with death and funerals, but Beppe and Gia certainly weren’t.

  Sergio nodded and stepped around Gia to stand right in front of Beppe, placing his palms on his cheeks.

  “I want you to know that you have family here. OK? We love you and we feel like we know you because Paolo told us all about you. He was so incredibly proud of you, you know? And I am too. If you need anything, ever, you come to us, you hear me?”

  Beppe nodded and his eyes one again filled with tears. Sergio kissed Beppe’s forehead and released him. He moved to Gia and gave her a hug, kissing her temple.

  “When are you leaving?” he asked as he released her.

  “Tomorrow evening.”

  “We’d love to have you over for lunch then. Please.” Sergio pulled out a business card from his jacket’s inside pocket and gave it to Gia. It was a luxurious white card with the name Sergio Salvatore and his phone number written on it. Nothing else. He took out a pen from that same pocket and wrote something on the back of the card. “Here’s the address. We’ll have lunch at noon tomorrow, everybody’s going to be there and they’d love to meet you. Both of you.”

  “I’ll see what I can do,” Gia said. Sergio nodded and without another word slipped into the back seat of the car.

  CHAPTER TWENTY THREE

  They didn’t talk during the short drive to the hotel. If it wasn’t for Beppe’s quiet ‘thanks’ after they parted ways with Sergio, they would have spent the entire time in silence. No words were needed though – they both knew what was going to happen once they were inside their room.

  The door closed securely behind them. Beppe prowled after Gia who had entered before him and was taking her shoes off. He hovered behind her, taking in every luscious curve. The air between them crackled with sexual tension. She slowly turned and met his eyes, and Beppe saw hunger and need burning in hers. No doubt. No hesitation. She wanted him, right now, and nothing mattered beyond this moment.

  Beppe palmed her cheeks and angled her face upwards before claiming her mouth in a fierce kiss. Her tongue immediately glided over his own and Beppe couldn’t get enough. Gia played with his tongue stud and he growled, moving his hand behind her neck in an attempt to pull her even closer, while his other hand cupped Gia’s jaw and forced her mouth to open wider. She clung to Beppe , as she moaned against his lips and welcomed every slide of his tongue, every nip of his teeth, every grind of his hips against her.

  Beppe was so turned on and so lost in his desire for Gia that he wasn't sure he'd be able to control himself. Hurting her with his passion was not an option though. Panting, Beppe used the last shreds of sanity and pulled back. A groan of protest erupted from Gia and her lust filled eyes searched his face for an explanation.

  “I’ve wanted you for so long...” he began through labored breaths. His heart was beating so fast and strong he thought she could hear it. “I don’t want to hurt you. I... I can’t hold back.”

  White hot heat ignited in Gia’s hazel eyes and closing the distance between them, she grabbed his t-shirt and pulled him to her.

  “The hell you can’t,” she said and mashed their mouths back together. Beppe growled deep in his throat and pushed Gia backwards without breaking the kiss, walking them towards the bed.

  When the back of her knees hit the mattress, Beppe stopped, tugged his t-shirt over his head and tossed it to the floor. Gia watched him transfixed, her eyes glowing with appreciation as they moved over his body. Her tongue snaked out to lick her lower lip. Beppe snapped the button of his jeans open, watching as Gia’s eyes followed his every movement. He slid the zipper down slowly and pushed the jeans down his thighs and off his legs. Gia drew a quick breath and held it as he stood before her in nothing but black silk boxers.

  She’d seen him in his underwear many times before, but she’d never looked at him like that. Finally sweeping her gaze back up to his, Gia turned around. She lifted her hair off her back and presented him with the zipper of her dress. The same one he’d helped her zip into this morning. An urgent need to get her out of the fucking funeral dress overcame him and Beppe pulled the zipper down so forcefully the fabric tore. Unfazed, Gia wriggled out of the dress until it fell around her ankles. Beppe knelt down and helped her step out of it. Then he tossed it in the direction of the trash can. He never wanted to see the dress again.

  Slowly Beppe slid his hands up Gia’s calves, her thighs and then on to her hips, leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake. He hooked his thumbs in the sides of her panties, pulling them down as he brushed his lips across her silky skin. He glanced up in time to see Gia throw her head back and hiss softly. She cupped her breasts and then shakily removed her bra. Beppe took the hint and standing up behind her, removed his boxers quickly.

  The moment she turned to face him, the little control Beppe had left snapped. She was so beautiful, but that wasn’t the only reason why he wanted her so much. The raw need and complete submission in her eyes left him breathless. He fused his mouth with hers, taking her in a possessive kiss.

  Without breaking their kiss, Beppe circled her waist with his arms, lifted her up and tossed her onto the bed, falling right on top of her. He worshiped her with his mouth, kissing her jaw, her neck, her collarbone... He covered her with nips and licks a
nd kisses until Gia writhed under him, unable to control her throaty groans of appreciation. Beppe rubbed the pads of his fingers over her nipples and Gia arched off the bed, his touch sending jolts of pleasure through her body. His lips followed his fingers and when the silver stud on his tongue touched her erect nipples, Gia cried out in utter bliss. Beppe reveled in the way he set her up in flames.

  His hands, mouth and tongue explored every inch of Gia's skin, leaving red marks behind. The fact that he’d marked her body and would be able to see his love bites and nicks the next day, almost proved too much for him to handle. As if reading his mind, Gia buried her hands in his hair and none too gently tugged him back up. She slashed her mouth over his, biting his lips to a point where Beppe thought he tasted blood.

  He didn't care. He was hers to do with as she wished, and he’d welcome it.

  Gia’s hands explored the muscles on his back, sliding over every indent and groove. Her touch sent his nerve endings into a frenzy. He lost himself in the feeling of her soft tongue playing with his, her body under him, her nails scratching his back, his hips, his ass. Beppe’s soul was stripped of pain, grief, sadness and fear; his love for this incredible woman the only thing left burning within him. It was amazing, something he hadn’t allowed himself to feel in a very long time.

  Beppe latched his eyes to Gia’s and as they connected visually, he wanted nothing but to sink into her and claim her as his once again. This time he wouldn’t let go.

  “I haven’t had sex since I last got tested and I’m clean.” He said, barely managing to get the words out.

  “I’m on the pill. I haven't had sex without a condom since you. Got tested two months ago...” Gia couldn’t finish her sentence because Beppe slid into her in one slow, deep thrust. He knew she’d have insisted on a condom if she had even a shadow of a doubt about either of their safety.