Holly's Wishes

by Karen Pokras

  Holly nodded. So he didn’t feel guilty about the kiss part? “The whole thing was so unexpected,” she said. “And probably shouldn’t have happened. I was upset with Jared, but that didn’t mean I should be kissing other men.”

  “Right. The thing is—”

  The timer on the stove buzzed.

  “Hold that thought,” Holly said, getting up. “This stuff heats up really fast, I don’t want it to burn.” She let out a breath as she walked to the kitchen. The conversation was taking an odd turn—her chili had impeccable timing.

  Ben seemed nervous as she handed him a bowl of piping hot food. “Thanks. It looks and smells great.”

  Taking her seat next to him, she placed her own bowl on the coffee table. “You were saying?”

  “I was saying … yes,” he repeated, as if he needed a reminder of where he left off. He balanced the bowl on his leg, staring at his food, while stirring raptly as if all of the answers were in there. “Well, the thing is,” he paused again. “You know how at the wedding I told you I wasn’t really good about the whole talking to women thing back in high school?” he asked with an uneasy laugh. “I guess I’m still not very good.”

  “You’re doing okay,” she lied.

  “I’m not, but thanks. Anyway, ever since we saw each other at the wedding, I — I know we shouldn’t have, but I’m glad we kissed. I needed to know. I felt something—when we kissed, that is.” He searched her eyes. “Did you feel it too?”

  Holly nodded and sighed. “But—we can’t. I can’t.”

  “I know. I just haven’t been able to stop thinking about—”

  The phone in the kitchen began to ring interrupting him. Jared. It was a sign. It had to be.

  “I have to get that.” She ran into the kitchen. Taking the receiver into the bedroom, she softly closed the door behind her as she said, “Hello?”

  “Hey baby. I’m just checking in to say hi. These long shifts are killing me. I can’t wait to get home and wrap my arms around you.”

  Holly closed her eyes and leaned against the wall. “How’s work going?” she asked.

  “Oh, you know … same old boring crap. The guys aren’t giving me shit anymore at least. Now I have to get my boss off my back. He’s been in a bad mood all night. Anyway, my break’s just about over. I’ll be home around midnight.”

  “I’ll leave dinner for you in the stove.”

  “Thanks, baby,” he said, and then yelled to someone else, “I’m coming! Geez—can’t a guy get thirty seconds to take a piss?” He swiftly hung up the phone.

  Holly closed her eyes for a moment, trying to think of the right words to say to Ben, before walking back into the living room. When she got there, he was already gone. Next to his bowl of chili was a scribbled note that read, “I’m sorry.”

  Chapter 24

  “Are you okay? You don’t seem your normal cheerful self.” Dan looked over at Holly as they ran through the first several lines of their rap. Her performance was lackluster at best.

  “What?” she responded. “Yes, yes, I’m fine. I’ve just got a lot on my mind, sorry. We can do it again if you want.”

  “It’s okay. I know how busy it gets around here trying to get everything done with the short week for Thanksgiving. We probably should’ve skipped rehearsal today.”

  She wished she could concentrate on the talent show and forget about everything else. Things with Jared were fine. Great actually. He hadn’t had any more problems at work or drunken incidents since he apologized and had made a few more hints about a big surprise coming her way for her birthday. Something shiny that was guaranteed to make her smile. If only she could forget about …

  “So what do you say?” Dan asked. “Should we call it for today and pick up after the holiday? We’ll still have plenty of time to finish. You seem kind of beat. No offense.”

  Holly laughed. “None taken. But I’d rather stay, if that’s all right. The stuff that’s got me stressed out isn’t work related.” She knew Jared wouldn’t be back until around eight o’clock. The last thing she wanted to do was go home to a quiet, empty apartment where her mind would surely wander to places she wanted to keep tucked away. Right now she only wanted to keep busy.

  “I hear you. My family’s been giving me a lot of pressure lately, too. Happens every year around this time. Why can’t you be more like your brothers and settle down with a family? Gotta love the holidays! Ho, ho, ho, and pass the rum.”

  “How many brothers do you have?” she asked.

  “Two. I’m the youngest, and they’re both married with two kids each. Apparently for me, having five hundred kids nine months out of the year doesn’t count.”

  “I feel your pain,” she said, nodding. “I’ve got two sisters. My older one is married with a kid. I’m in the middle, and my younger sister is still in college, so that makes me next in line. The pressure is full on.”

  “Fun, isn’t it? New plan. We’ll still pick this up after the break, but instead of going home, let’s go grab that bite we never had a chance to get. Didn’t we agree on a rain check?”

  Holly smiled. “As a matter of fact, we did.”

  “Listen,” Dan said. “I need to tell you something before we go. Something I’ve been wanting to tell you for a while now.” Staring intensely into her eyes, he placed his hands on her shoulder and tilted his head.

  Oh my God. He’s going to kiss me. I’m in my boss’s office, and he’s going to kiss me. She needed to stop him, she just couldn’t get the words out—she was completely frozen in shock at what was about to happen.

  “Am I too early?”

  Holly tore her eyes away from Dan to follow the sound of the voice. Before her stood a totally hot guy with dark blonde wavy hair and chiseled features. She could see the ripples of his muscles under his tight shirt. What was with all these guys who looked like underwear models?

  “Oh, hello. No, you’re not too early at all. In fact your timing is perfect.” Dan tightened his grip on her shoulders as he faced the other man and said, “Holly, I’d like you to meet my partner, Alex.”

  “Ah, Holly,” the man said, flashing a radiating smile. “It’s great to finally meet you. Dan talks about you all the time.”

  “Thanks. It’s nice to meet you, too.” She turned back to Dan. “So … your … partner?” she asked, looking between the two men with a confused expression. “Like business partner? For what, the talent show?”

  Dan released Holly’s shoulders and walked over to Alex, taking his hand. “No, partner as in life partner.”

  Holly’s chin dropped, as she peered at him. “You mean … you’re gay?”

  He raised his eyebrows and nodded. “That’s what I was about to tell you. And also I wanted to let you know Alex would be joining us. I had asked him to stop by to watch us rehearse. I thought it might be good for us to get comfortable performing in front of someone. But we can start that part next time. Mind if Alex tags along for dinner?”

  “Wow,” Holly said, raising her eyebrows. “Ok. Sure, Dan, whatever you’d like.” She shook her head and laughed under her breath. “I seriously have to work on reading signals better. I thought for sure you were flirting with me today … and for the past couple of months. In fact, I could have sworn you were about to kiss me.”

  “Really?” Alex asked, half chuckling, looking at his boyfriend.

  “What?” Dan asked. “Could happen. I’m cute and loveable.”

  “Yes,” Alex said, kissing him on the cheek, playfully. “Of course you are. Holly’s just a little too feminine for you, that’s all.”

  “It’s true,” Dan agreed.

  She laughed. “It’s okay. I’m taken anyway. I’m just usually spot on about these things.” She shook her head again. “Wow, okay. Well, it’s nice to meet you, Alex. Has anyone told you the two of you make a really good looking couple?”

  Alex nudged Dan in the shoulder, and smiled. “Thanks. Hey, did someone say something about food?”

  ~~~

/>   The tiny diner on the other side of town had only one table open.

  “Where’d you find this place? I had no idea this even existed,” Holly said, checking out her surroundings.

  “It only opened a couple of months ago,” Dan explained as they sat down. “It received a big write-up in the city paper. We’ve been dying to come here. Usually the line is out the door. I figured it wouldn’t be so bad at four o’clock on a Wednesday. Looks like we got lucky.”

  She scanned the menu. “So what’s good?”

  “Milkshakes,” Alex said. “People come from miles around to get their hands on one.”

  “Ah, so you’ve heard I’ve been known to have ice cream for dinner every now and again?”

  “You, too?” Dan asked. “That’s one of our standard meals. Their roast beef sandwich is supposed to be very good as well. Actually, I don’t think you can go wrong with anything here.”

  They all ordered sandwiches and chocolate shakes. When the waitress brought them over, Holly’s eyes nearly popped out of her head.

  “This is for one person?” she asked. “Guess I know what I’ll be having for lunch tomorrow and dinner … and possibly lunch the next day.” Taking a sip of her milkshake, she sat back in her chair. “Oh, I have died and gone to heaven. This is orgasmic. Oh shit. Did I just say orgasmic in front of my boss? … Did I just say shit in front of my boss?” Holly put her hands over her eyes like a visor and sunk into her seat, feeling her cheeks turn what was surely a shade of crimson.

  Dan cracked up. “I can’t believe we haven’t done this before. The three of us need to hang out more often. Don’t you think, Alex?”

  “Absolutely,” he said, laughing also. “Holly is just adorable.”

  “See?” Dan said, looking at her. “This is exactly what we needed, I can feel the stress easing already.” He took a sip of his shake and leaned back into his chair. Closing his eyes, he started to moan.

  Oh … he wasn’t …

  “Holly.”

  Dan opened his eyes as Holly looked over to the familiar male voice.

  “Ben … hi.” She hadn’t seen him since that awkward night in her apartment. She sat in silence for a moment as she tried to think of something to say over the pounding of her heart. “I’m sorry, this is Dan Harper, the principal at the school where I teach, and his partner, Alex—” She realized she never got his last name.

  “Schiff,” he said, standing up to shake Ben’s hand.

  Dan stood up as well. “It’s nice to see you again. We didn’t get a chance to meet the other day.”

  “Right, I’m sorry if I interrupted something then when I showed up at school,” he said with an odd sadness to his voice.

  “Oh no, it was fine. We were wrapping up a staff meeting.” Dan looked around their tiny table that was already packed with food. “Would you like to join us?”

  Holly glanced away briefly. The three of them had been having such a wonderful stress-free meal. Dan didn’t know. He was only being polite. As far as he was concerned, Ben was one of Holly’s friends. And he still was—but he was more than that. She met Ben’s eyes. He appeared so … lost. She wanted to reach out to him. She just … couldn’t.

  “No, but thank you,” he said, with an uncomfortable tone. Maybe she had been reading him wrong after all. Maybe what she interpreted as sadness was really him being distant and distracted. “I think I see a stool at the counter opening up. It was nice to meet you both … and Holly,” he said with a certain formality, “it was nice to see you again.”

  “You too,” Holly said quietly. Her phone buzzed as they watched him walk away.

  “Is everything okay?” Dan asked. “You seemed kind of thrown off when he came over.”

  “No, everything’s fine.” She sighed and read her text message.

  Hey baby. I’m going to be a little late tonight. We got our holiday bonus early. Have some shopping to do for my sweetie’s special surprise. The future is looking awesome for us—you & me, baby! You & me. xoxo.

  She shook her head. She was an idiot. Why was she sitting here getting upset about Ben, when she had the perfect guy at home?

  Chapter 25

  “Happy Birthday, baby.” Jared rolled over and kissed Holly, lightly stroking her hair as he nuzzled her neck.

  “Mmmm,” she moaned, curling into him. “It’s not my birthday, silly, it’s Thanksgiving. My birthday is still two weeks away.”

  He still knew exactly how to send a shiver up her spine the first thing in the morning. It helped he’d been hinting daily he had something exciting planned for her birthday. Did this mean he was giving it to her early? She perked up.

  “I know baby, but since I got my bonus already, I was able to pick up your big surprise sooner than I expected. Of course, if you don’t want it—” He rolled away from her, pretending to be upset.

  “What?” she asked with a wide smile. “No, it’s okay. You can give it to me early. I mean, if that’s what you want to do. She playfully nipped at his shoulders, trying to get him to come back.

  “I don’t know,” he said, “I may need a little convincing.” He turned his head toward her, flashing a mischievous grin. “Just how deserving are you?”

  “Oh, I’m very deserving,” Holly said, wrapping her body around him. “Would you like me to show you?”

  An hour and a half later, Holly woke up alone in bed. “Jared?” she called out.

  “In the kitchen,” he replied.

  She threw on her robe and followed the smell of freshly brewed coffee. Kissing him on the cheek, she sat down at the table as he poured her a cup.

  “What time are we going over to your parents?” he asked, smiling the biggest smile she’d seen in weeks.

  Normally they’d head over around four o’clock, but since Ava, Max, and Jenna were coming in, she wanted to get there early to visit and share her news. This was going to be a year to remember.

  “I guess we’ll leave as soon as we get dressed,” Holly said. “So …” Grabbing her mug, she walked over to Jared.

  “So…” he repeated. “Why don’t you go make yourself pretty, and when you get back, I’ll have your surprise waiting for you. Then we can go see your family.”

  Beaming, she kissed him before racing off to take the quickest shower she’d ever taken in her entire life. When she returned, she noticed a small box with a blue bow sitting on the coffee table. Walking over to the couch, she sat down beside Jared and waited.

  “Happy Birthday, babe!” he finally said, handing the gift to her.

  Holly stared at him. It wasn’t exactly the proposal she was expecting, but maybe he was saving the good stuff for after she saw the ring. She slowly opened the box, wanting to savor the moment she’d been waiting so long for. She knew he didn’t have a lot of money, and she didn’t have great expectations. The ring part wasn’t even that important to her. It was the message and commitment behind it.

  “Well?” Jared asked as Holly just sat there staring, not saying a word.

  “It’s a key,” she finally said. A key. Not a ring … a key.

  “I know, silly.” He gave her a quick kiss on the lips and said, “Close your eyes and come with me.”

  She did as she was instructed, and he took her hands to guide her across the room. Was it possible he was taking her to a locked box that held her ring? It was obvious her surprise was far from over. Maybe this was one of those proposals where the bride-to-be is sent on a treasure hunt. Now, that would be romantic! With renewed optimism, Holly held on tight to Jared’s hand as he led her toward the front wall of their apartment.

  “Open your eyes,” he finally announced.

  Scanning the space around her, she searched for the next clue.

  “Look,” he instructed, “out the window.”

  Holly looked out and down. Next to her car was a second car, a compact one, with a bow on the top. She glanced back up.

  “You bought me a car?” she asked, confused.

  “Happy Birthday, b
aby!” he yelled again. “I told you I had something big and shiny planned! Now I won’t have to borrow your car to get to work all the time. It’s going to take so much pressure off of us.”

  “You bought this for you?”

  “Well, it’s for us, of course. You know. I figure we can switch off and stuff … maybe every other week or something. What do you think? You’re speechless, huh?”

  “Yes, I think I am indeed speechless.”

  “I’m going to go get ready,” Jared said. “I can’t wait to drive this baby over to your parents’ house.”

  “Wait,” Holly said.

  He turned around. “What’s up, babe? You want to take it for a spin now? I guess that’s okay.”

  “No, that’s not it.” She stared at him, trying hard to fight back her tears of disappointment.

  “I really surprised you didn’t I? Are you all right? You’re acting kind of funny.”

  “No, Jared, I’m not all right,” Holly responded.

  “I don’t get it, babe. In my book, this should be your best birthday ever. What’s your deal?”

  “My deal is I finally figured out we’re reading two completely different books, and we always will be.” She stared into his eyes and saw a blank expression looking back at her. He clearly did not understand any of her frustration. “I thought you were going to propose today. Ever since Ava’s wedding, you’ve been saying stuff like you needed extra money to buy something special for me—for our future—something shiny. What the hell, Jared? A car? I thought you were talking about an engagement ring.”

  “I can’t afford an engagement ring, babe, you know that. I got the car on the cheap from a buddy.”

  She looked at him and shook her head. “Jared, the ring is so not even relevant. Proposing is really just words … from the heart. Last time I checked, that part didn’t cost any money. Of course, you have to want to say the words. You have to have the balls to be able to say the words.”

  “This is bullshit. I bought you a freaking car, and this is the thanks I get? I’m going to take a shower.”