Before We Fractured: Books 1-3

by Bradon Nave

  “Cool, cool. So…how much homework are you bitch slapped with?”

  “Not much…I’m more worried about the looks we’re gonna catch when we walk back into school. It’s like we’re the stars of some poorly-written teen drama or something. Literally everyone is going to be tripping in our shit.”

  “Silly Lily…who cares what they think. I gotchu, gurl. Chafeel?”

  “Dork.” Her smirk had me wanting to sweep her up and race up the stairs to my room.

  “Boy…you gonna just stand there or throw me the ball?”

  “I’m about to throw you somethin’.”

  Inhaling deeply, she smiled. “It’s about damn time. I’m so done with having to basically beg every single time.”

  “Wha…beg? Are you freaking crazy, woman? I’m always down.”

  “Right…okay.”

  I couldn’t tell if she was serious or messing with me. Without a doubt her sexual appetite was up to par with mine, but I was under the impression that I’d kept her satisfied as far as that went.

  “You’re serious? Like…you’re not happy with—”

  “Boy, if you don’t start feeding your dog…she’s gonna jump the fence and eat somewhere else.” Laughing as she said this, I knew she was being sarcastic. “Hush, D. I’m messing with you. But you have thirty-three seconds to report to your bedroom for smash duty.”

  ***

  Panting while on our backs, nude and looking toward the ceiling, Lily began giggling.

  “Well…that was kinda awkward and romantic all at the same time.”

  “What?”

  “You saying you loved me like that.”

  “But…I do.”

  “I know, but proclaiming your love while making an O face is…”

  “It’s what?”

  “Perfect…awkwardly perfect.” Kissing my cheek, her breath tickled my ear. “I need some water.”

  “Okeydoke.” Rolling out of bed, I walked butt naked down my stairs and to the kitchen—filling two glasses of water. Turning to the doorway I was met by a girl’s voice…not Lily’s.

  “Oh, wow.”

  I looked to see Sarah staring southward as I attempted to cover myself with the glasses in my hands. “Sarah…I didn’t hear you.”

  “I can see through the glasses, dumbass.”

  “Well, stop looking.”

  Turning my back to her, I felt flushed as she laughed.

  “Oh wow…view from the back too.”

  “Sarah, please turn around—”

  “We’re home!” I heard my mother’s voice announce as she and Larry walked through the door behind Sarah. “Duke? Son, what the hell are you doing?” Her condescending tone assured me she was highly concerned with the fact that I was nude in front of a girl other than Lily.

  “Oh…my…God.” Setting the water on the table, I turned to my audience—my hands at my side as I made no attempt to cover myself. “I was upstairs with my girlfriend, and came downstairs to grab us some water. I wasn’t expecting it to be a social gathering.”

  Unzipping her sweat jacket, Sarah tossed it to me to cover up with. “Here. Just messing with you, D.”

  Shaking her head while smiling, my mother sat the grocery bags down as I secured the jacket around my waist—covering the goods completely. “Honey…I love you…but if at all possible, I’d like to live the rest of my life without seeing your ding-a-ling again. ’K, snookum’s?”

  “Sorry, Mom.”

  “I’m just giving you shit, Babyboy. How about you go get dressed. We’re going to cook a huge home-cooked meal.”

  “That sounds amazing.” Making my way to the staircase I turned to hear Sarah talking to my mom.

  “I’ll text Lil. But can you just tell her I stopped by—”

  “Have you had supper?”

  “Um…no but I don’t want to intrude—”

  “You’re not intruding, sweetheart…you’re helping me cook the shit.”

  “Oh…well, okay then.”

  Laughing from midpoint of the stairs, I further extended the invitation. “Yeah, Sarah. Don’t you want your jacket back?”

  “I’m not going to mind if you wash it first, D.”

  “Ten-four.”

  Walking into my bedroom, I closed the door and threw the jacket to the floor, Lily—flushed and wide-eyed, was already dressed and sitting on my bed.

  “What the hell was that, D?”

  “Oh, ya know…just my boys on display for your girl, my mom, and her fiancé. Nothing too awkward or anything.”

  Covering her mouth with her hands while shaking her head, Lily began laughing.

  “Duke…seriously…I’m going to have to monitor you twenty-four-seven.”

  “Probably. You could have told me Sarah was coming over before I went balls-out all happy to the kitchen.”

  “I didn’t know.”

  “Yeah well, the price for the Duke show is helping out momma in the kitchen. She’s putting

  Sarah to work.”

  “Oh gosh…maybe I should go—”

  “No…no, you should not. My digestive health depends on your ability to stay the hell out of the kitchen.”

  “You’re such a dork. Get dressed. Let’s go rescue Sarah.”

  ***

  Patting my stomach in the backyard, I looked to the stars. Larry and my mom had turned in early and Lily, Sarah, and I were taking advantage of the mild evening.

  “So um…sorry bout earlier, Sarah.”

  “You’re good, D. I’m sorry if I embarrassed you.”

  “Nah…not too bad I guess.”

  “Okay. So, I was talking to Kacey today and I have an idea.” Sarah seemed almost enthusiastic as she turned to us. “Okay.” I wasn’t sure what else to say.

  “Kacey mentioned multiple times that out of everything, she’s going to regret not having the memory of senior prom with Jessie.”

  “Sarah, neither of them are going back to school—”

  “I know, Duke. But Jessie will be back in one month for a week. I was thinking we could have our own prom…like, a legit prom with decorations and shit. We could all dress up and take pictures and shit. We could give them the senior prom memory they’d be missing out on.”

  Completely silent, I knew without a doubt that the smile on Lily’s face meant that this was happening. For the next month, I’d be at the mercy of these two beautiful blondes as they planned every detail of this prom. I found myself wanting to run.

  “Sarah, you’re a genius!” Lily hugged Sarah as the girls jumped up and down.

  “So…we’ll be going to two proms then…okeydoke.”

  “Um, I’m not, Duke. I don’t see any point in hanging out with a bunch of people I really don’t care to see again. You, Lily, Jess, and Kacey will probably be the only people I’ll still associate with in a year from now. I’m only going to one prom…our prom. That is, if you two are down to help me pull this off.”

  “Oh my gosh, yes! Where at? Where should we do it?”

  “I was thinking right here, Lily. This backyard is huge.”

  The thought of attending prom in my own backyard with my legitimate friends rather than at my shitty school with people I didn’t really care for was somewhat appealing. “Okay. We’ll do it. I’m sure Mom won’t care. I can get dingle-Larry to help me cut out some props…and I bet Mom wouldn’t mind taking pictures.”

  Hugging me, I could feel Lily’s excitement. “When you go to drop Jessie off tomorrow, get the details as to when he’s coming home. We should totally surprise them with official invitations!”

  “Okay.”

  As Lily continued to hug me, a happy Sarah walked over and hugged the both of us. “This is going to be the best prom ever!”

  Wondering what the hell I’d gotten myself into, I had nothing left to do but smile…smile and look to the stars.

  CHAPTER

  TWENTY-TWO

  The facility seemed nice from the outside…and it was nice that it was within a reasona
ble driving distance. Jessie had been in good spirits for most the drive there, but as Joe pulled into the parking lot of the large brick building, I could sense the tension mounting in my friend.

  Putting the car in park, Joe turned to us in the back seat. “You boys wait here. I’m going to see what I need to do about checking in.”

  “’K, Dad.”

  Watching Joe walk into the building, I softly punched Jessie’s shoulder. “You got this, Broseph.”

  As he looked to me and smiled, I realized for the first time I was actually completely confident in my proclamation. Jessie was going to be okay.

  “Duke…I need you to know that I mean it when I say you’re the best person I’ve ever met, man. I don’t know why you’ve stuck around even after all the drama and…and all the bullshit. You’re the best friend a guy could ask for. I don’t deserve your friendship, dude. I’ll never be able to repay you for everything you’ve done for me.”

  Staring at Jessie, I found myself nearly dumbstruck. “Wha…what do you mean, Jess? Everything I’ve done for you?” Chuckling, I shook my head. “Don’t you get it, dude? It’s not about sticking around or deserving anything. I’m here because…I’m here because I love the shit out of you, man. You’re my family…I mean that. I’d do anything for you. If it wasn’t for you,

  Cory, and your mom and dad…my life would have been pretty lonely. You’re my brother,

  Jess…you’re my family…you always will be.”

  His smile was nothing but appreciation. I too was appreciative. I got him back…we got them back and now he was about to walk through the doors and into a state of healing.

  “Love you too, D.”

  “Dude…Jess, are you asking me out?”

  “Ha! Shut up.”

  “Listen to me, Jess.” My serious tone caught his attention. “I mean it…you got this. It’s going to be okay.”

  “I know…it’s just…I’m nervous. I’m going to be starting over in there.”

  “And we’ll be starting over out here. But I promise you I’m only a phone call and a short drive away. Be excited, Jess. Dude, you’re going to get better. You’re going to get legit better.”

  “You’re right…this is going to happen. It’s really going to happen.”

  “Hell yeah it is. And Me, Lily, and Kacey will be here next Saturday to visit. It’s gonna be all good…promise.”

  Opening the doors, we stepped out of the vehicle and into the parking lot. I watched a nervous smile replace the apprehension on my friend’s face as he stared at the brick and mortar.

  From the front door of the facility, Joe motioned us inside. Looking to me, Jessie inhaled and let it out forcefully as we stepped in the direction of the front door.

  Walking beside my friend, I found myself nearly overcome with gratitude. Jessie was being given the tools needed to combat the monsters of his youth. As we walked through the door, we were greeted by a kind-looking woman. I was certain this place was perfect.

  “Gentlemen, my name is Patrice Felt. I’ll be showing Jessie to his quarters. We’ll give you a few moments to get acclimated and then Jessie and I will begin the tour.”

  “Can my dad and Duke come on the tour too?”

  “I’m sorry, Mr. Kasper. We like to begin treatment as soon as you walk in the door. All guests are asked to wish their friends and family happy healing, and are then asked to join us during weekend visiting hours.”

  “Oh…okay.”

  The slight disappointment in Jessie’s voice was met with the enthusiasm in mine. “Dude, this place looks awesome. You got this, Jess.”

  Turning to us, Jessie put his bag down as Joe approached. “Well, Dad…”

  “You have no clue how proud I am of you, Son.”

  Taking Jessie in for a huge hug, Joe embraced his son as I lingered near Patrice, trying not to pry.

  “Get over here, boy.” Joe motioned me to him and Jess, basically forcing us into a group hug. Patrice smiled at the interaction as we broke apart. “You have a beautiful family, Joseph.”

  “Yes ma’am, I do.”

  “Okay then, Jessie Kasper. Are you ready to begin?”

  Smiling once more as he looked to Joe and I, Jessie turned to Patrice. “Yes ma’am…I am.”

  CHAPTER

  TWENTY-THREE

  The silence…the vast emptiness and countless shadows…all created the perfect environment for conjuring memories. The gymnasium—so much of my character and discipline was built in this place.

  Sitting by myself in the back row, staring out onto the freshly waxed floor at nearly eight in the evening, I envisioned Cory, Jessie, and I on the court, our classmates screaming our names like we were celebrity status or some shit. The adrenaline…the comradery…the thrill of having half a gym full of people on our side—cheering us on. Back then, I honestly believed the saddest day of my high school years would be the day Jessie and I turned in our jerseys after our last senior game. I was clueless.

  Hearing people older than me say that time flies by was beginning to make more sense. It honestly did seem like only months ago that I had Cory’s guidance…his big-brother-like advice—like, I only told him goodbye a few months ago.

  So much had changed. So much was changing. Looking at the weight-room key Coach Danes had given me freshman year, I found myself wishing the man would storm through the gym doors, eye me, and demand to know what the hell I was doing in his gym. Hard ass as he was…he was part of my history; he would always be a part of my history. The vibration in my shorts pocket had me reaching for my phone.

  “Lily…you’re totally interrupting memory time.”

  “Sorry, D.” Her voice sounded off.

  “You okay?”

  “Eh…no. I hate my uterus. I was thinking about going to the garage and taking it out.”

  “Um…yeah, let’s hold off on that thought.”

  “Can you come get me? I need some girl stuff but I’m cramping too bad to drive.”

  “You dork. Just text me what you need. I’ll go get it.”

  “For real? You’re not embarrassed?”

  “Nah. MILFS think shit like that is cute and chivalrous…and it’s not like I haven’t walked around in the place with a used condom glued to my back.”

  “Don’t make me laugh.”

  “For real…if you’re hurting that bad you shouldn’t be out shopping for shit that I can grab.” “Oh my god…you’re freaking perfect.”

  “Right? You just sit there and do what girls do when they’re in that predicament, and I’ll be there in a bit.”

  “Love you, D.”

  “Love you too, Lils.”

  Pressing end, I looked out over the gym once more, allowing my memories to rest. The somberness of the moment was shattered when the door to the girl’s locker room came open. In the shadows, I watched as a distraught Tamara emerged, walking down the sideline while wiping her face. Clearly, the girl was upset.

  “Tamara.” My call stopped her in her tracks, her gaze bouncing around the stands until she spotted me.

  “What?”

  “You okay?”

  “What the hell do you care?”

  Continuing her course to the gym door, she left me with the choice to remain seated, or follow her for answers. I followed her.

  Walking up behind her, I caught her attention.

  “Duke…it’s not a good time. I came here to be alone. I want to be alone right now.”

  “You’re crying, Tamara.”

  “Wow, aren’t you observant?” Finally, she stopped, allowing me to face her.

  “Are you okay?”

  Raising her sleeve to her puffy eyes, she wiped her tears away, turning her face from me.

  “Everyone knows, Duke. Everyone in our class knows what that man did to me.”

  Stepping slightly closer, I leaned my shoulder against the cold wall. “Tamara…no one blames you. None of this was your fault.”

  “Well no shit, Duke. I was just a little…I was so
young. But that doesn’t make it any easier to face these people. I just can’t…”

  “What do you mean?”

  “What do you see when you look at me, Duke? You see a pathetic girl who was touched and manhandled by the same doctor that was supposed to be helping me overcome the loss of my grandparents. Or maybe you see the same slut that your girlfriend Lily and Sarah sees.” “No…Tamara, they didn’t know. They don’t see that. I don’t see that.”

  “Then what do you see?”

  “My friend…I see my friend is upset and I want to help if I can.”

  “Friend? Oh wow. I thought we were only friends when I was blowing you in your car on game night.”

  “That’s not true, Tamara. I’ve always considered you a friend. Believe what you want, but I’m worried about you. If I can’t help you, can we find someone who can?”

  “No…I can’t be here anymore.”

  “At school? You can’t be at school anymore?”

  It was then that my eye caught the semi-transparent, sepia-colored bottle in her free hand—a pill bottle.

  “Tamara! Are those pills?” Reaching for the bottle, I was shocked to read Hydrocodone on the label, but thankful to be looking at what appeared to be a full bottle as I held them to my face.

  “Please, Duke. Give them back.” Her non-threatening and defeated voice was coupled with a steady flow of tears.

  “Did you take any of these?”

  “No…not yet. Please give them back, Duke.”

  “Tamara…this isn’t the way.”

  “Duke.” Her voice was all but a whisper as she pleaded. “Everyone knows. They all know what he did to me.” Placing her hands over her face, she cried into them.

  “Come here.” Hugging her, I felt nothing but guilt for not knowing about her torturous past. “I can’t get past this, Duke. I’m scarred for life. I’ll always be his victim.”

  “No, you won’t.” Holding her out so I could make eye contact, I lifted her chin. “When I look at you I see an intelligent, articulate, witty, sarcastic girl who is beautiful on the inside and out. The only way you could ever be a victim is if you allow someone to take that from you. Don’t let that bastard take that from you, Tamara…you’ve got the rest of your life to shine. This isn’t the way. I know I don’t have all the answers and I’m a horrible friend…but I do know that this isn’t the way. Please…Tamara, don’t do this.”