Out With A Whimper

by Michael Noe

  I stopped the car and got out despite the warning bells going off in my head. This was something that took a lot of time and effort. This was a hanging tree, but what kind of offence did these people commit? Why were they hung? Flies buzzed around my head as I inched closer. My stomach rolled but I willed myself to keep from puking. The day was hot and humid. It was the kind of heat that follows you and settles on you like a thick blanket.

  “Matt, get in the car,” Audrey hissed through clenched teeth. I knew she was scared. Hell, I was scared too. This was a bad scene but I had to see this up close. The smell was horrendous. Each nude body dangled from the branches as if they were macabre wind chimes. What kind of person would do this? A sick fuck with too much time on his hands.

  “I will in a second.” This was the last place I needed to be but I couldn’t stop staring. I had this urge to touch them, to feel their leathery skin. There was a woman with half a breast bitten. There were large tears in her flesh as if someone had wanted to send a message. I didn’t think this was the work of zombies. This was serial killer shit. I practically ran to the car on legs that threatened to buckle with each step.

  Driving away, the scene didn’t get any better. There were mangled bodies propped up on cars and posed like demented artwork. There were baffling messages written in blood on a church. The doors had been opened and a statue of Jesus was placed on the lawn. “What the hell is this shit?” I asked with a shudder.

  “I have no idea, but let’s just get the hell out of here.”

  I knew that I would see this in my nightmares. There was no way that could have been the work of one person. What frightened me the most was I could have ended up like that. Being alone like that for any length of time does something to you. If you’re mentally ill, there’s no telling what you’re capable of. When society fell, the serial killers and the deranged were free to do whatever they wanted. The laws no longer applied to them so they were able to create their sickest and wildest fantasies. There was no one holding them back anymore.

  It was the one thing I never thought of when I read those books about the world ending. The rapists walking free to do anything they wanted to whomever they wanted. It was too disturbing for mainstream fiction, but it was a reality. I assumed that at most, humanity would improve, but you have to factor in the things that no one talks about into the equation. The world to some people is still round, and there are genuinely good people still left out there. This couldn’t have been further from the truth, Evil was far more likely to manifest itself now and I was seeing it firsthand. As we drove away, I couldn’t shake the feeling that we were being watched. The streets were empty but I had the feeling that someone was in the shadows somewhere, willing us to stop. It was a feeling I couldn’t shake, even when we were far away.

  The commune was a place of peace and serenity. I had never felt so relaxed and I don’t think Audrey had either. It could have been destiny that led us to this small town, but I doubt it. If I thought about destiny, there would be way too many instances of it. Was it destiny that brought Audrey and I together? Was it also possible that the zombies came so we could meet? The problems with fate and destiny were many. Too many things happen that we assume it’s fate or whatever, but when you step back and look at it, you can see that it can’t be. It would be virtually impossible. Our finding the commune was just an accident. If it hadn’t been us, it would have been someone one else that found these people.

  I don’t even want to use the word commune. When I think about that word, all I can think of is Jim Jones and his flock, or Charles Manson and his family. I guess the only thing to call it is a commune, but it wasn’t a cult. I can assure you of that. They didn’t have any pamphlets or Kool-Aide to pass out to guests, and as far as I could tell, there was no religious meetings held in a tent somewhere. These were all people who had banded together out of necessity and a desire to not die. They were doing exactly what I was against. Had it not been for Audrey, I wouldn’t have even given these people a second thought as I hightailed it away from them.

  This was different than what we had experienced in Georgia. I can’t even say that they were hippies because they were realistic and had created ways to protect themselves. It was as if they were banded together by necessity, not this idea that they could save the world through love and harmony. It just wasn’t possible. These people were just trying to stay alive. It was the only thing that made sense to them.

  We had entered Florida by this point. Why Florida? I don’t know. It just seemed like a good idea at the time. We were nomads looking for a home and for all I knew, anywhere could have been our final destination. Florida wasn’t on my list of top vacations though. I may as well admit that so far, it had certainly been an adventure. Now, I was hoping I could relax and let my guard down. It was almost as if we had blocked out what was happening so that we could pretend everything was normal. We knew this of course, but it was easier to pretend. After what we had seen, we needed to be a normal couple.

  We were in a gas station, loading up on junk food and laughing as we tried on sunglasses and looked through cheesy I heart Florida t-shirts. We were just a couple on a road trip. “What do you think, babe?” I had a large black cowboy hat perched on my head and aviator shades on. I looked ridiculous but when Audrey took the hat and placed it on her own head, she looked perfect. She was dressed in a wife beater and low-fitting shorts that made my mouth water. She looked at herself in the small mirror above the display case the sunglasses rested on and gave me a wink. “The hat looks way better on me than you.”

  “I agree. You about ready?” I had a bag full of shit neither of us needed but our options were limited. The store was littered with broken glass and overturned shelves. I could see blood splatters on the soda coolers, and for just a brief moment, wondered what had gone down here.

  This was Florida though. All I really knew about Florida was NASA and Scientology. In all of my travels, I can say I had never been to Florida and probably never would again. It wasn’t that I had anything against Florida mind you, it was just hot as fuck. I would have been happier in Vegas. I wanted to fuck my girl on a Black Jack table piled high with hundred dollar bills. It wasn’t much of a goal but it was good to have them.

  “Yeah,” Audrey began. Her head cocked quizzically to the side like a confused puppy. Soon, I heard it to. It was the sound of motorcycles. At least two by the sound of them.

  “We need to get out of here.” I grabbed my bags and Audrey’s hand and headed through the busted window. The engines got louder as they neared where we stood in the parking lot. Audrey climbed into the car and I followed. As we began backing out, I saw them and felt myself begin to shake. There were two people. A slender, skinny man wearing a vest and blue jeans, and a girl wearing a lime green bikini top and cut off shorts. The woman began waving at us frantically and I had a half mind to floor it and get the fuck out of there. I didn’t want to die in Florida.

  “What the fuck do they want?” I was nervous and despite my misgivings, I stopped the car. The woman smiled as the bike pulled up beside us. I tried to smile back but just couldn’t make the muscles work.

  “Holy shit,” The man began slowly. He had a thick southern accent that made the words almost unintelligible. “You are the first people we have seen in months. Fuckin’ hell. My name’s Randy and this pretty thing behind is Sheila. Holy shit.”

  “I think we scared them. I told you taking the bikes was a bad idea.” This was Sheila and I couldn’t help but smile as she smacked Randy playfully on the arm.

  “No reason to be afraid. I come in peace,” Randy replied in between a good natured chuckle.

  Audrey spoke first and smiled politely, but I could feel her stiffen beside me. “We were just leaving. We needed supplies.”

  “At this dump? Holy shit, this place was full of action a while back. Zombies as far as the eye could see.” Randy gestured toward the road as if he were pointing out where they had come from.

  “We don�
��t want any trouble, Randy.” The words we come in peace failed to register. I remembered the tree and my encounter with the man on the highway.

  “Of course not. We don’t either. We saw you come in and wanted to offer you a place to lie low. You look like you could use some rest.”

  I watched Sheila for a moment and wondered when she was going to pull out a gun. “No offense, Randy, but we don’t trust anyone.”

  Randy laughed and pulled a pack of cigarettes from the pocket of his vest. “I don’t blame you. I have seen some things that would make you shit your pants. I’m sure you have too.”

  I nodded and felt my fear lessen a little. “I’m Matt, and this is Audrey.”

  “I take it you’re not from around here.”

  I shook my head. “Ohio,” I replied.

  Sheila whistled in surprise. “What brings you here?” she asked. It was as if we were a couple on vacation instead of two people seeking a new home. I wondered if she was just making conversation or just stupid.

  “Zombies and shit.” Audrey looked at me and shrugged her shoulders. Randy burst out laughing and I couldn’t help but join in.

  “I hear that,” Randy spoke slowly as if he were suddenly in mourning. “This place was crawling with them. I don’t know where they came from, but holy shit! It was a bad scene. Ohio? Impressive.”

  We all lapsed into silence and I looked around, expecting more people to join us. I was still on edge despite Randy’s attempts to win us over. The air was humid and the occasional breeze did fuck all. I was miserable. “This place you’re talking about? Where is it?” I had no intention of going but asking about it seemed like the right thing to do. I could politely decline and we could get as far away from these people as possible.

  He pointed up the road. “Not too far. We just took over a housing complex really. It was the easiest way to keep everyone together.”

  “About twenty so far. Nothing big, but I have a feeling it’ll grow. If you don’t want to come with us, I understand.” Sheila added.

  In the end, we did go because we were both tired of traveling. Was it actually possible for people to come together and actually live without greed? We were about to find out. I was skeptical. Everything I had learned about the end of the world had been wrong so far and this would be further proof of that. No one could stay harmonious for a long period of time. Ego would creep in and someone would want to be in charge. It was just human nature.

  We rode for about fifteen minutes and the usual stalled car on the road had yet to surface. Someone had pulled them over to the side of the road to make travelling easier. I wondered if they had done it. It would make sense. If they were all living together, they would want to try and make things as normal as possible. It seemed crazy, but for them, it must have been working. They needed something to tether them to the old world so they created the closest thing to it that they could. I was almost impressed by their dedication.

  We pulled up to a two story structure with slate gray siding that ended with brick closer to the ground. There were three windows facing the street and from my vantage point, I could see a small balcony in the back. These were abandoned condos that they had taken over. He wasn’t kidding about the back yard. They had started a garden that was bursting with life. Despite my initial misgivings, I was glad we came.

  “Is this really it?” Audrey asked. Her eyes were wide and I could hear the excitement in her voice.

  “I guess so. Jesus, when he said apartments, I didn’t imagine this at all.” We parked and Randy was already walking toward us with a grin.

  “What do you think?” I could hear Jefferson Airplane blasting from somewhere in the backyard. As we got closer, I could see a topless woman sunbathing. Her breasts were a golden bronze with nipples that looked like raisins. There was no one else around which made me nervous.

  “I like it. Where is everyone?”

  “I assure you, they’re here. We have a patrol that sweeps through the area. That’s how we found you two.” We entered a condo and I couldn’t help but whistle. There was a stone fireplace against the far wall and black leather furniture that accentuated cream colored walls. It was an open concept that allowed you to see every room in the condo no matter where you were.

  “Patrols?” Audrey asked. She wasn’t looking at anything but Randy. Sheila had stayed behind with the topless woman. I forced myself to look away and was surprised that Audrey hadn’t said anything.

  “Yes, the patrols are what keeps us protected. Those cars we passed? We moved them to allow us clear access to town. Without patrols, who knows what could happen, or who we could encounter? We aren’t stupid. We know what exists out there and we want to be protected, and ready for it.”

  "So, you're a recruiter," I respond lamely. It made sense now. Randy would show us around and sell us on the idea of peace, love, and geese and we'd instantly climb onboard. The condos were an enticing aspect. A slice of heaven while you experienced hell on the earth. I bet he felt really proud of what they accomplished. I would if I were in his shoes

  Randy frowned and shook his head. "Not at all. I can't make you stay if you don't want to. There's no way to force you into doing something you're not comfortable with," Randy stopped speaking for a moment. "For some, we're just a way station. They stay for as long as they want and go on their way. They don't want to save the world. They just want to survive. You don't believe in any of this. I can tell."

  I wondered how many others he saw like me. We're they as lost as I had been? There's nothing worse than watching the American dream die. It doesn't make a sound either. It's just a moment that fills you with sadness and remorse. All ideals crash and burn. It’s just a fact of life. The remorse settles deep into your bones, enters your lungs and fills your blood with regret and longing. Not everyone wanted to save the world. "I don't. I appreciate you allowing us to stay but I don't believe in safety in numbers. It makes things harder."

  “What about you, Audrey?” I hated that Randy had gone over my head to ask for her opinion because it scared me. Was I prepared to leave her if she decided to stay? I loved her, but not enough to risk my life for a bunch of strangers. It was suicidal.

  Audrey stopped moving for a second and looked at me. In that one glance there were so many emotions. I felt my legs weaken as the reality of what her decision would mean, not just to me but us. “It sounds too good to be true. Living as one. Fighting to keep society growing. Have you even thought about what that means?”

  “Exactly! Just looking around, it seems like you’re just playing it by ear.”

  Randy shook his head. “It’s because we are. There’s no way to rebuild without a plan. We have an idea of what we want to do, but it takes time.”

  “Time would seem like the enemy,” Audrey began. “What do you plan to do?” It was almost like she had crawled inside my head. These were all the questions I had planned to ask but she was beating me to them.

  “At some point, we would love to expand. We’re small right now but I have a feeling that we won’t be for long. Electricity, rebuild to where we once were.”

  This was the moment I feared the most. Rebuilding? What exactly did that even mean? It seemed to me that the last thing anyone would want would be to get back to where society had once been. Wasn’t that what got us in trouble in the first place? “It sounds great but you must realize that the larger you get, the greater the risk.”

  “Of course. The thing you have to remember is that laws and rules have disappeared. We need order. Society can’t function without it.”

  I couldn’t help but frown at his words. This was what I was waiting for. That moment where the ego peeked out and the real story came through. It was an opportunity to be a God for even a second which was tempting. He would be the one to lead them and they would follow blindly. Absolute power corrupts. It always had. Soon, religion would follow and then of course, politics would follow. The old system was broken but that wasn’t important to the dreamers. In this new societ
y, the political lines needed to be drawn, but in order to have a fair and balanced society, you have to have God to give it all balance. Balance was essential to being perfect and a free thinking, foregoing nation. No one ever mentioned or even remembered that most wars were in the name of God. It was God and the backward thinking of the few and the weak that got us where we were in the first place.

  The idea was that America was founded on the principles of God, but in reality it was founded on greed. It had nothing to do with God at all and more to do with land that someone else owned so because we want it, we’ll steal it. It was all in the name of greed disguised as God. Nothing ever changed. When people attacked gay, and transgendered people, it wasn’t out of a love for their God. It was out of fear and hatred. Anyone that dared be different was labeled as an enemy. The idea that God was all loving was bullshit. You could preach about it all day, but the moment a gay man or woman wants to get married, then it becomes all-out war. It was this rhetoric that served as the Christian right. No one talked about Jesus’ message of love. It was all about the protection of the morality of the hypocrite. Randy had a great idea, yet he failed to see how dangerous it was.

  “You sound like a hippie. You know this can’t work, right?” I responded. Someone had to be honest with him why shouldn’t it be me? Audrey shot me a look, but I ignored her. “No one is going to follow this utopia you seem to have in your head. What if the zombies attack? Are you prepared for that?”

  “As ready as I can be. You don’t think it’ll work and you’re right. Maybe it won’t, but the least we can do is try. You want to live in fear and just keep moving on because you feel that it’s safer. At least here we have a chance.” I’m sure he had told this spiel to everyone he came in contact with. There were some that were going to buy into it hook, line and sinker. Why wouldn’t they? It sounded too good to be true. It worried me and it should have worried Audrey too. I could see that it didn’t and I knew why. She was looking for a home. She had dragged me along with her so she wouldn’t be alone. I knew that but it never dawned on me that she may not even love me. To get me to follow her wherever it was she felt she had to go, she needed to tell me she loved me. In the end, I happen to think that she did.