A Little Sugar, A Lot of Love: With cupcakes, coffee and karma

by Halton, Linn B

  Katie

  Is It Bad Timing, Or Is It Fate?

  When I awoke this morning, it felt like just another day. Even opening the pile of birthday cards that had been arriving in the post over the last couple of days, my heart wasn’t in it. I should, at least, be excited about the viewings and the prospect that today might be the start of moving forward. Instead I just felt alone and lonely, for all of the company that Liam has been. Hazel said I was being miserable refusing to celebrate my thirtieth birthday with a proper bash. I pacified her by saying I would have a joint moving-in and birthday party, thinking that at least then I’d have something worthy of a celebration. Being thirty and starting over is hardly something you want to shout about.

  When Liam wrenched me away from Adam, and Lily, my head was still spinning. On Adam’s last visit he said they were coming down again soon, but I thought maybe he’d phone beforehand. I guess I was living in the hope that their visit meant something and that the next time he’d want to make sure I was around. But a visit today, of all days – when just the sight of them was a tonic in itself – felt meaningful. I would have cancelled the appointments if I’d known. And why would you have done that, Katie? You can’t live on dreams. You’ve travelled that road and you know it leads to a dead end. But my heart still began to race the moment I found myself face-to-face with him. Goodness knows what my expression was saying. Liam was clearly put out when I didn’t say ‘hello’, and move on. I should have introduced him. Damn it!

  My mind was distracted from that point onwards and Liam had to keep dragging me back down to earth. All three properties were around the same price, but two needed too much work doing to them. The other one had potential and most of the work was simply redecoration. It did need a new kitchen, unless you are into seventies nostalgia. It wasn’t classic retro, more shabby retro. But it was a darling little cottage with a manageable garden. Liam couldn’t seem to find anything wrong with it.

  ‘Pretty near the mark,’ he commented, the moment we were out of range of the estate agent’s ears.

  On any other day I know I would have been excited, but today all I could think of was Adam, and Lily. What if they go back home tomorrow and this afternoon was the last chance I would have of ever seeing them again? Could I use that as an excuse to give Adam a call if they don’t turn up on Monday?

  On the drive back to the shop my mind plays out several scenarios. The first is that they don’t come back and in a fit of desperation I jump in the car. The next thing I know, I’m knocking on Adam’s door. The scene is so vivid I make a strangulated sound, as I imagine Adam standing in front of me. Liam asks if I’m all right.

  In the next scenario I’m unlocking the shop on Monday morning. Adam and Lily are there, patiently waiting. As I open the door Adam steps inside, ‘Katie, I love you,’ he murmurs throatily, taking me in his arms. He kisses me passionately, while Lily stands behind him, smiling.

  That scenario sends me into a fit of giggles.

  ‘What’s up, birthday girl?’ Liam asks, trying hard not to look at me, but to keep his eyes on the road. ‘I hope this is a joke you’re going to share?’

  ‘Nothing, I’m just … erm … thinking through a few scenarios, you know …’

  ‘Well,’ he interjects, ‘the first one has dry rot and the last one, with the shared drive, has boundary issues. Okay, the people who live there happen to be friendly with their neighbours. If, for whatever reason, you didn’t get on with them, they could make your life hell.’

  Liam then explains in detail why shared drives with no proper parking bays are problematic. I switch off and imagine a third scenario. Adam and Lily arrive at the shop to buy some cupcakes. We sit and have a coffee, then they wave goodbye with a, ‘have a nice life’.

  My stomach feels like a lead weight is lying at the bottom of it. This is crunch time and if they do turn up, it could be the last time I ever see them. It feels all wrong. This can’t be the last time. I know I said I was enjoying my freedom, and I was beginning to imagine my cosy little cottage retreat, but I guess I’ve been fooling myself. When I went through that I’m looking for a hero moment, a couple of weeks ago, that was the real me coming out. Except, for hero, substitute the name Adam. I want Adam. Oh, damn, I want Adam. I want Adam!

  Eureka! I need to get back to the shop as quickly as possible and ask Hazel’s advice. This can’t wait until Monday morning. I would regret it forever if Adam, and Lily, left without saying goodbye. If Grace was right and I’m the one who could make Adam happy, really happy, then maybe sometimes Fate needs a little helping hand. As we pull up outside the shop I feel rather rude, knowing I’ve missed most of the one-sided conversation during the ride.

  ‘Liam, thank you so much, you’ve been wonderful. I feel dreadful saying this, but there’s no point in pretending. Dinner together this evening isn’t a good idea. I’ve just realised I’ve been a fool and it’s time I followed my heart.’

  He leans across, probably hoping for a hug, but I’m out of the car before he even realises I’ve opened the door. I sprint into the shop, forcing myself to slow my pace as I cross the threshold in the interests of customer safety.

  ‘Hazel, can you pop into the office, please?’ I pant, nodding my head in the direction of the office in case she didn’t catch my garbled words. She excuses herself and leaves Marcie serving.

  ‘What on earth’s happened?’ She follows me inside, shutting the door firmly behind her.

  ‘Adam, did you see him earlier? He hasn’t been back in, has he?’

  ‘No, I haven’t seen him. Was he here?’ She’s puzzled by my erratic behaviour and I can’t blame her. I gather up the few items lying loose on my desk and scoop them into my handbag.

  ‘Look, I have to go. Adam arrived as I was walking out with Liam. I think he came to say goodbye. I’m going to pop home and calm myself down. Once I think Lily is likely to be in bed, I’m going round to see him. Fingers crossed he’s staying at Grace’s house and not in a hotel. Hazel, if you were me, what would you say? My mind is a total blank and I’m shaking life a leaf just thinking about it.’

  ‘Gosh, Katie, I don’t know … if he sees you like this you’ll scare him off. I’ve never seen you in this sort of state before.’

  ‘Words, Hazel, I need some words.’

  She looks totally wordless.

  ‘Okay. Let me think. How about casual – ask him how long he’s staying and if he’d like to go out for a drink? It is your birthday – that’s a great excuse.’

  ‘Good, but he’d need a babysitter for Lily. Think of something else.’

  ‘How about, “I love you and I want to have your babies”. I think it’s a line from a film. I doubt its one he will have watched.’

  I look at her incredulously, as if she’s lost her mind.

  ‘Helpful. Not.’

  ‘Look, I don’t know what you should say. Don’t over-think this, he isn’t going to run away the moment he sees you, is he? He’ll probably invite you in for coffee. It will be relaxed, so you’ll have time to figure it out.’

  ‘You think so?’

  ‘I think so.’

  ‘Okay, I’m gone. Thank you, sorry, here are the keys – I should have asked …’

  ‘Go, you’re doing my head in. Ring me … afterwards.’

  I run to the car and all the way home I talk to myself, practicing opening lines. Nothing sounds remotely right. This could be the most important moment of my life and yet I have no idea at all what I’m going to say. Grace, if you’re listening now, I really, really, need your help! There’s only one thing I want for my birthday, well two, actually – Adam and Lily.

  Lily

  Dad, Pull Yourself Together

  Dad’s been on edge all afternoon and it’s driving me mad. He even insisted on taking me out to buy ice cream so he could drive past Sweet Occasions. It was closed and no one was in the shop. Katie looked shocked when she saw us this afternoon and very sad when she couldn’t stop to talk.

&nb
sp; This evening Dad and I are playing board games. He isn’t concentrating and it’s getting very boring. I like to win, but I have to keep reminding him it’s his turn because he’s deep in thought.

  ‘I think I’ll go to bed, Dad. Can I read for a while?’ Usually he says no, but tonight he nods and I walk over to give him a hug. Not because he said yes, but because he’s feeling down and I hate to see him so sad.

  ‘I’ll be up in a bit to tuck you in. Guess I’m a little pre-occupied at the moment. I promise I’ll be back to normal tomorrow.’

  He smiles and I love the little crinkles at the side of his eyes when he gives me his special Dad smile.

  As I get ready for bed, Dad puts on one of his favourite bands and I know that listening to music is how he relaxes. Grandma, you need to give Dad a bit of help at the moment, he’s not good at this sort of stuff.

  I look around to see if she’s here, but she’s not. I’m sure she can hear me though and I know she’ll sort it all out.

  When the doorbell chimes I wonder who it can be. Standing on tiptoe to peer out of the window, all I can see is the roof of the porch. I creep along the landing in time to see Dad opening the door and I crouch down, out of sight.

  ‘Hi. You’re the last person I was expecting. Not that I was expecting anyone at all, of course, being that we don’t know anyone …’ Dad suddenly loses the plot and starts mumbling a load of rubbish. As I peer down, he steps back and in walks Katie! I want to yell and jump up and down. Instead, I hug my knees and stay super quiet.

  Dad closes the door and they stand there, like statues. They are facing each other, but neither one says anything. I’m holding my breath and about to explode, when they both begin talking at the same time.

  ‘Adam, sometimes people’s paths cross …’

  ‘Katie, sometimes people’s paths cross …’

  And then the most magical thing happens. They stop speaking and start k-i-s-s-i-n-g! Thank you, Grandma, I think I can go to bed, now.

  Grace

  Sometimes People’s Paths Cross for a Reason

  If people took the time to think back over past events they would clearly see that even though the path meanders, each little step counts for something. Life is a learning experience. If it wasn’t for the ups and downs it would be distinctly boring. The good times are much sweeter because of the bad things every single one of us has to battle through.

  It’s also true that anything, and everything, is possible when it comes to affairs of the heart. But sometimes patience is a virtue and a necessary part of life. We have to wait for all of the little steps to be played out, for good reason.

  To see my darling Adam, and wonderful Katie, hugging and kissing like the lovers they are destined to be, was truly wondrous. As the weeks fly by Katie says goodbye to Sweet Occasions for good and moves north to be with Adam, and Lily. It’s the start of a new and happy chapter in their lives.

  Adam surprised and delighted me, making a tough decision that didn’t sit well with his innate sense of right and wrong. He was prepared to stand up and fight for Katie, believing in the love he knew he could offer her. Being Mr Nice Guy is very gentlemanly, of course. If Adam’s strong sense of right and wrong had caused him to hesitate, the outcome could have been very different.

  Thankfully, there are times in your life when you only need to take one small step in the right direction, for things to begin falling into place. If you miss that all-important step, who knows for sure whether you will be given another chance? Perhaps your Fate will simply be rewritten. Miraculously, Adam found the strength he needed at precisely the right moment in time and I’m so proud of him.

  Katie has come to realise that sometimes the dream has to change. Letting go of what she thought she wanted, wasn’t easy. On this occasion it merely signalled the beginning of an even bigger, and more fulfilling, dream. I think the fact that Katie chose Adam over Sweet Occasions clearly shows the depth of her feelings. Of course, I sensed that from the very start when Adam first mentioned her name. The light in his eyes said more than any words could have conveyed. That instant sense of attraction when he least expected it was something he couldn’t explain, but also couldn’t ignore. It wouldn’t let him go, for a very special reason. Lily can, at last, see that when soulmates find each other, everything suddenly slots very neatly into place. Her tenth birthday party saw them all together, celebrating it as a family unit and it was a heart-warming scene. There really can be a magical ‘happily-ever-after’ ending to the tale, where love is concerned. One day Lily, too, will find her own Prince Charming and the fairy tale of life will continue.

  I learnt something, too: that when your time is coming to an end, you have no choice but to let go and embrace a new beginning. What I can see now, with hindsight, is that those you leave behind are often stronger than you could ever have imagined. All it required was a little nudge in the right direction and I’m glad I was here to do that. Where affairs of the heart are concerned, when love rears its head, it brings with it an inner-strength. There’s a burning desire to grab whatever happiness you can.

  My job is done and I can now relax. Jack smiles at me and gives a nod of approval. ‘You were there for him when it counted, my dear. And I bet you have no intention of missing their wedding day.’

  Katie

  Until Death Do Us Part

  As I stare at my reflection in the mirror the face looking back at me is almost unrecognisable, as if this is a stranger I’m seeing for the first time. I’m not talking about the beautiful, beaded dress that fits like a glove and makes me feel like something out of a bridal magazine. Yes, it’s the fairy tale come true, but it’s the change in me that is almost unbelievable.

  Life had become heavy, onerous and each day I battled to retain hold of what felt like a fast-disappearing dream. I never once stopped to question whether I was doing the right thing. When I finally let go and realised that my heart was trying to tell me something, it was as if someone had lifted a heavy load from my shoulders. Things could be different and life is too short to waste even one precious moment of it. When you truly love someone and they return that love in equal measure, you can face the future without fear. Feeling that for the very first time was empowering and I know Adam felt it too, the moment he slipped that engagement ring on my finger. Now I’m ready to say my vows and Adam will be mine until death do us part.

  ‘I haven’t seen Lily for a while, I think she wandered outside with Emily. I’m just going to check on them.’ I stand on tiptoe to give Adam a quick kiss on the mouth, but he pulls me in closer and I almost lose my balance as the seconds race by. Pulling away from him, he laughs.

  ‘Don’t be long, Mrs Harper. I’m missing you already.’

  Our eyes meet, and for one second time stands still and everything else fades into the background. There is only ‘us’ and the look in his eyes is a joy to behold.

  ‘I just want to make sure she’s happy and not feeling left out, or missing her mother.’

  ‘I know and that’s one of the many reasons why I love you so much.’ He reaches out and touches my cheek, softly brushing it with his fingers. I walk away feeling his eyes on me and his love all around me.

  As I head towards the French doors leading out into the hotel grounds, I pass a sea of smiling faces. Our wedding party isn’t huge, but every single person here has a meaningful place in our lives. The fact that Kelly declined her invitation was actually rather a relief in one way, but I was disappointed on Lily’s behalf. Going forward Kelly will be a part of our new life and it’s going to be important that we can all get on.

  I can hear Lily’s voice even before she appears in my line of vision, and as soon as we have eye contact she runs towards me.

  ‘Have you seen the maze?’ she asks, slightly out of breath from all the running around.

  ‘No. Would you like to show me?’

  ‘This way, Katie, it’s awesome!’

  As I gently lift the fishtail tulle so I can follow Lily along t
he gravel path, it brings joy to my heart to see her skipping along without a care in the world. More than anything I want her to feel that today she’s simply gaining another person who will love and care for her, and not to feel that I’ve come between her mum and dad. Surely it’s only natural that any child coming from a split family would secretly long for their parents to reunite at some point in the future? When one of them marries someone else, no matter how accepting everyone involved is at the time, it must be tough to see that dream snatched away.

  She stops, turns and smiles at me.

  ‘Isn’t it magical?’ Her voice is full of enchantment as she spins around and for the first time I take in our surroundings. The tall hedging is quite dense and having followed her blindly, my head whirling with thoughts, I have to agree. The air is still and all I can hear is the sound of birdsong. Ahead of us, the narrow gravel path extends about another thirty or forty feet, before taking a sharp turn to the right. I glance up at the blue sky above and when I look down again Lily has disappeared, but I can hear her tinkling laughter. This time I grab the flared tulle skirt around my ankles, gathering it up so that I can run without tripping.

  ‘I’m coming,’ I shout, and I run as fast as I can to catch up with her.

  The twists and turns seem to go on forever, until quite suddenly I’m there in the middle of the maze and find Lily sitting on a bench casually swinging her legs.

  Now I’m the one who is out of breath and I drop the tulle, run my hands down over the form-fitting skirt and settle myself down next to her.

  ‘Are you having fun?’ I turn to face her, scanning that perfect heart-shaped face for any sign of hesitation.

  ‘I love it here and you look beautiful, Katie. I’ve never seen Dad so happy.’

  As she speaks she fusses with the hem of her dress, which is a knee-length, A-line style in lavender taffeta, with a beaded sash. She chose it herself and she looks like a little princess in it. As the seconds pass it’s nice to just sit quietly together, as if we’re sharing a secret moment, made even more special by the tranquillity of the setting.