A Walk Down the Aisle

by Holly Jacobs

  “Sophie, we know you’re in there, and we’re not leaving until you let us in,” came Mattie Keith’s voice.

  Sophie didn’t need to wonder who the other part of Mattie’s we was. She went down, opened the door and found Mattie with Lily.

  “Listen, I’m not really up for company...” she started, but let the sentence fade on its own because as she looked at her friends, she knew they weren’t leaving until she let them in. “Fine, come on in.”

  “I brought some wine,” Mattie said. “And Lily’s got the fixings for bruschetta. That was our girls’ night option. But in case we need something stronger than that, I brought...” She reached into her grocery bag and pulled out a pint of ice cream. “I bought one of every flavor they had.”

  “I think we might need some of both,” Lily said.

  Both women walked through the door without an invitation. They looked at the half-unpacked boxes. “Packing?” Mattie asked.

  “Unpacking,” Sophie told her. She saw understanding register in both Lily’s and Mattie’s expressions. “The wedding’s off.”

  “Temporarily?” Lily asked.

  “I don’t think so,” Sophie admitted. She’d like to think she and Colton could find a way to fix things, but she remembered his expression before he turned and walked out of her house. There was a sense of finality in it. “No, I don’t think so.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?” Lily asked gently.

  “No, of course she doesn’t want to talk about it,” Mattie said with an air of surety. “But she needs to talk about it, even if she doesn’t know it. First some wine, then some talk. Speaking of wine, there’s a chance I won’t be drinking much more of the stuff. Finn and I are talking about adding to the family.”

  “You and Finn are that serious?” Lily asked as she put her grocery bag on Sophie’s counter.

  “We’re talking about a quick marriage in August.” Mattie glanced at Sophie. “I wasn’t going to say anything, but Finn said you’d want to know. That you’d find out eventually anyway.”

  “Are you kidding?” Doors and windows, Sophie thought as she hugged her friend. “Of course I want to know. And this calls for a celebration.”

  She took the wine out of the bag and dug through her kitchen drawer. “I’ve got a bottle opener somewhere in here.”

  Mattie’s hand covered Sophie’s. “I brought one. And while I open the bottle, tell us what happened. Who was that girl?”

  Sophie sat at the table and let Mattie and Lily bring over the wine and bruschetta before she answered, “My daughter.”

  “You have a daughter and never mentioned it?” Mattie asked, shocked.

  Sophie tried to decide how to explain what it was like. How thinking about Tori, much less talking about her, hurt.

  She’d known she’d have to tell her friends, but she hadn’t talked to them because she didn’t know what to say. Stalling, Sophie reached for a piece of the bruschetta, and as she brought it to her mouth, she caught the overwhelming scent of garlic. It wafted up her nose, and she felt a sudden wave of nausea. “Pardon me,” she managed as she bolted for the bathroom.

  After she was done throwing up, she sank to the floor, covered in a cold sweat.

  She never threw up.

  The last time she’d been sick was when she was pregnant with Tori.

  “Sophie, are you okay?” Mattie called through the bathroom door.

  “Fine. I’m fine,” she said, thinking. Trying desperately to remember the last time she’d had a period. “I’ll be out in a minute.”

  She sat on the tile floor and leaned against the cool tile wall. The last time she remembered having her period was when Abbey had been sick in the hospital. She’d been buying feminine products when she’d heard the news. It had been a weird period. Light. Really nothing more than splotching. She remembered thinking how odd it was, but hadn’t worried since her cycles had been irregular since she’d gone off her birth control at the beginning of the year.

  When had Abbey been sick?

  Sophie got up and splashed some cold water on her face, then brushed her teeth and walked out to the kitchen.

  “Sophie, are you okay?” Mattie and Lily asked in unison.

  She nodded. “Mattie, when was Abbey sick?”

  “Why?”

  “What was the date?” she repeated without answering why she wanted to know.

  “April twenty-eighth. It was a Thursday and it was the scariest moment of my entire life.”

  Sophie watched her friends exchange worried looks as she sank into the chair. Two months. She did the math in her head, and if it was true, then sometime at the end of January, beginning of February, she’d have a baby.

  She’d have a baby with a man who’d left her.

  Again.

  She hugged her stomach.

  This time, no one, nothing, would tear the baby from her. Colton might not want to marry her, but this baby had been conceived in love. She’d stopped taking birth control pills in January because they knew they wanted a family right after the wedding, and her doctor had suggested it might take some time for her system to regulate. They’d used other precautions but, obviously, they’d failed.

  Then she thought about Tori.

  If it was true, if she was pregnant, what would the news do to the daughter she’d just found? Or rather the daughter who had found her? A child who already thought Sophie had simply given her away without a second thought or regret.

  One week ago, Sophie had been on the cusp of marrying the man of her dreams, starting a family with him and living happily ever after.

  This week, the daughter she thought she’d lost forever had stolen a car, come to Valley Ridge and objected to her wedding. Her perfect man had decided she was too much trouble to marry. And for a second time, she might be going through a pregnancy on her own.

  Sophie wasn’t sure if the situation was ironic, moronic or simply absurd, but a giggle escaped.

  Then another.

  Soon she was laughing, and tears were streaming down her face as she hugged her stomach and wondered if it was possible she was pregnant.

  “Sophie, you’re scaring us,” Lily said. “Come on, hon. Talk to us. How is it you have a daughter, and why aren’t you and Colton getting married? What’s going on?”

  “And, most important, what can we do to help?” Mattie said.

  Sophie fought hard to get herself under control. “Do you know the saying about God closing a door, but opening a window? Let’s open that ice cream and I’ll tell you.”

  And for the first time in her life, she allowed the story to spill out. She told her friends about her parents, who cared more about image and status than her. She told how her parents had chased off her boyfriend, and their ultimatum to cut her off without a dime, leaving her no way to support her baby. She told them that she’d acquiesced to her parents’ demands and gone to a home. She’d given birth in secret, like someone from a ’50s movie, and how she’d fought to give the baby to people who’d love her rather than the überrich couple her parents had chosen.

  And even though she told her story to her friends, she didn’t tell them about her screams when the hospital staff took her baby away without allowing Sophie to see or hold her. But she saw in their faces that they knew that part.

  She told about Tori finding her, about how wonderful Tori’s parents were. “And she’s coming to spend some time with me.”

  “How long?” Lily asked.

  “As long as she wants, at least until school starts. Her parents will come to spend the weekends.”

  “And Colton?” Mattie asked.

  Sophie shook her head. “I never told him about Tori. He sees that as a lie. I don’t know how to make him see that it wasn’t that I didn’t want to tell him, or that I didn’t trust him. I couldn’t tell him. For fourteen years, I’ve allowed myself one day a year to wallow in that old pain. Tori’s parents send a letter annually on her birthday through the agency. Pictures, too. That one day
, I read their new letter, and I reread the old ones. I look at pictures of a daughter I never held, and I see pieces of myself in her. I write a letter to her, a letter I never send, but just add to the box. For that one day, I allow myself to mourn. If I had allowed myself any more than that, I don’t think I’d have survived. And if I’d told anyone, and had to have seen the pity in their eyes daily, I would have buckled under the pain.”

  But suddenly that all changed. Tori was in her life again. She’d actually touched her daughter. She would get to know her.

  She didn’t think she could stand merely sharing the story. She wanted to shout it from the rooftops. She had a daughter, and Tori was back in her life.

  Sophie’s hand rested on her stomach as she laid it all out for her friends. Well, not all. She didn’t tell Mattie and Lily about her pregnancy suspicions, and they didn’t ask. She had to be sure before she said anything. And then she’d have to tell Colton.

  For a moment, she envisioned Colton telling her that they had to marry for the baby’s sake. And part of her would long to say yes, because having Colton in her life was what she wanted. But she didn’t want him that way. She didn’t intend to be an obligation. He was a man who valued honor, and she didn’t want to be something his honor demanded he attend to.

  No, if she was pregnant, even if he offered to marry her—which she was sure he would do—she’d have to say no. She’d have to be certain he understood that she’d never keep him from his child. She was positive they could work out something amicable.

  Telling him should be the hardest thing she’d have to do if she was indeed pregnant, but telling Tori, explaining it to her, would be worse. Sophie would have to find a way to tell Tori and make her understand that she’d never wanted to give up custody of Tori, that she’d done what she’d thought was best.

  She’d have to be sure Tori understood that she was loved.

  Then Sophie would tell her friends. These might not be the perfect circumstances, but this time, she was going to celebrate her pregnancy. Starting with telling her friends. But not tonight. Not until she was sure, and had told Colton and Tori.

  “What about Colton?” Mattie asked.

  For a moment, Sophie was confused, thinking that Mattie knew about her newfound suspicions, but then she backtracked on the conversation and realized she didn’t. “Colton and I...we’re not getting married, but we’ll build a new relationship. A friendship.”

  That’s what he’d said he wanted, and she’d said she couldn’t manage anything more than friendly. Well, that was no longer an option. If she was right, being friends with Colton was a necessity.

  She’d do anything for this possible unborn child, even break her own heart by pretending to be only friends with Colton when she was still so in love with him she could hardly bear the weight of it.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  TUESDAY AFTERNOON, Colton was on his John Deere mowing the lawn, knowing he should be in the fields but wanting to stay near the house. Yesterday, he’d worked in the barn.

  He told himself that even in the summer he needed to get things done around the house. And that was true, but things getting done around the house couldn’t take priority over things getting done on the farm and vineyard. He should be out today suckering the vines, or...

  He spotted a car coming up the long driveway and for a moment, he thought it was Sophie. For that split second, he thought she’d come to make him listen. To convince him that he was wrong and breaking up was wrong.

  It wouldn’t be the first time she’d read him the riot act and made him change his mind.

  For that split second, he was relieved. Sophie was going to fix things. To make him understand why she’d held so much back.

  Then he saw that it was Finn’s car. He could see there was someone in the passenger seat and they were sitting far too tall to be Sophie. He didn’t need to be able to make out the features to know it was Sebastian.

  Most days he’d welcome his two friends’ company, but not today. He’d been avoiding them and dodging their calls. Hell, he’d been hiding out from everyone. He’d realized that he had no groceries in the house because he’d planned on being on his honeymoon. Rather than shopping in Valley Ridge, he’d driven across the state line into Pennsylvania to North East to restock the kitchen.

  He didn’t want to see anyone.

  Except for Sophie, a small part of him whispered.

  But since his friends had obviously seen him on the lawn mower, he didn’t have a choice. He turned off the riding mower and walked down to the house, resigned. There was no way out of their attempts to help him.

  “You two couldn’t take a hint?” he said by way of greeting. He removed his hat and wiped the sweat from his brow before reseating it.

  “No, obviously we couldn’t,” Finn said.

  Finn pointed to a case of beer, and Sebastian held up a bag as he said, “We brought our own refreshments, so you don’t have to worry about playing host.”

  “As if I’d worry,” Colton scoffed.

  His friends headed over to the picnic table at the side of the porch.

  Colton sighed, and followed them. “I’m not ready to talk about it.”

  Finn snorted. “Yeah, that’s a huge surprise. Colton not ready to talk. I’m shocked. How ’bout you, Seb?”

  “Sebastian.” Their friend corrected his name automatically. “And yes, I’m shocked, too.”

  Colton gave in to the inevitable and sat down. “So, if you didn’t come for the sordid details, why’re you here?”

  “We came to hang out with a friend who, though he might not be ready talk, needs us,” Finn informed him. “Even if he doesn’t realize he needs us.”

  “That’s what my family says when they leave messages on my machine. They tell me that I need them. They’re wrong and so are you.”

  “They’re worried,” Finn said. “We might have talked to your mom and she might have encouraged us to come out.”

  Sebastian looked serious as he said, “And we thought you should know that the entire town knows that blue-haired girl from the wedding is Sophie’s daughter.”

  “How do they know?” Colton certainly hadn’t said anything to anyone.

  “Sophie told Lily and Mattie and asked them to spread the word. Just telling MarVee and that was taken care of.”

  “But why?” Sophie had never told him. She’d kept the fact that she’d had a child and given her up for adoption a secret from him, and now she wanted the entire town to know? He tried to tell himself that he felt hurt, but he knew it was a lie. He didn’t feel hurt—he felt angry. He felt like a fool. How could she not tell him about such a huge event in her life? And if she hadn’t told him about her daughter, what else hadn’t she told him? That was the question that haunted him. What else was Sophie hiding?

  Finn opened up a bottle of beer and handed it to Colton, then another and handed it to Sebastian. “Tori’s coming to spend the summer with Sophie. The girl’s parents are going to be here on weekends, but she’ll spend the weekdays with Sophie.”

  Colton drew a long sip of beer when what he really wanted to do was slam it back and reach for another. Unfortunately, he wasn’t a drinker, and definitely not a drink-in-anger-and-pain sort of drinker, so he sipped.

  “Thanks for letting me know,” he managed.

  “So, are you two rescheduling the wedding?” Finn asked.

  Colton took off his hat again and wiped at his brow as a means of stalling. He put his hat back on and shook his head. “No. I don’t think so.”

  “Oh,” both of his friends said in unison.

  “Speaking of weddings,” Sebastian said as he elbowed Finn.

  Finn looked guilty and Sebastian looked awkward. Something was up. “What?” Colton pressed when they both remained silent.

  “We held off saying anything because we didn’t want to take the spotlight off you and Sophie, and now...” Finn’s sentence died and he looked extremely uncomfortable.

  “What?” Col
ton repeated.

  While Finn took a sip of his beer, Sebastian said, “Finn’s getting married in August and he feels uncomfortable telling you, given the circumstances.”

  Colton knew his friend needed his support, so he smacked Finn on the back and forced a smile. “Congratulations. You and Mattie? It’s hard to believe you’re going to marry the kid who used to make us all crazy. Do you remember that time we were sleeping over at your house, and Mattie spent the night with Bridget?”

  All three men groaned in unison.

  Finn shook his head. “Mattie still has the pictures she and Bridget took of us, and swears that if I ever try and leave her, she’ll let them go public.”

  “I still don’t know how the hell they got into the room and put makeup on the three of us without us waking up.” Sebastian shook his head, and then glared at Finn. “There’s nothing for it, you’re going to have to stick with her through thick and thin, if only to save our fragile male egos.”

  As if realizing what he said, he turned to Colton. “Sorry.”

  “No, don’t be.” Colton looked at Finn. “I’m happy for you both, and I’m sure Sophie is, as well.” He was happy for his friend, but he felt... Ah, hell. What he felt was a jumble of emotions. He was too simple a man to figure them out. “So, why August?”

  “We want to go on a Disney World honeymoon with the kids before school starts. Frankly, I think Abbey’s more excited about Disney than about the wedding,” Finn told them. “You both will stand up for me? We’re thinking something simple at the house....”

  Colton listened as Finn laid out his plans, but his thoughts were on Sophie and her daughter. Tori. That was her name. And she was coming to Valley Ridge for the summer?

  What kind of parents let their kid spend a summer with a stranger, even if that stranger did give birth to their child?

  Probably the same kind of parents that let their kid dye their hair blue.

  And even as he had the thought, he felt guilty. His younger sister might not have dyed her hair blue, but she had gotten her belly button pierced. His parents had a farm in Fredonia, about forty-five minutes away, and he didn’t see them as much as he’d like, especially in the spring and summer. But they’d come up for a day a few weeks back. The whole family had gone down to the lake for an afternoon. Misty had on a bikini, so the piercing was right there for the world to see. He’d been shocked, and when he said something, his mom and sister both laughed. “A woman’s only got a few good stomach years,” his mother had said. “Your pregnancy ruined mine and any hopes I ever had of a belly button ring. I said yes, because I thought Misty should capitalize on the fact that she can still wear one.”