Reflections of Me

by Yumoyori Wilson

  I turned my gaze on Maximus and gave him a sad look. "And you, Maximus. You're so damn kind and patient. We have barely had time with each other and yet you haven't made a fuss or complained. I'm just doing such a shitty job as a girlfriend, in my mind, but all of you are able to deal with my nightmares and panic attacks. You make sure I eat and nap on the days I barely sleep. All of you, including Zane, are trying to help me, but I can't seem to give myself equally to each of you along with my familiar, family, and now add in school again...I just can't do it," I admitted, frustration lacing my tone.

  "Maybe if I had the full month break and it wasn't spent with me being unconscious for half of it and the other half recovering, I would have been able to spend time with everyone. We could have enjoyed breakfast together and beach dates during the day. We'd have campfires and float on the lake just like we're doing now. We have to squeeze all of that in a week now, and once school starts...I don't know where everything’s going to go."

  Maximus was quiet, nodding his head as he appeared deep in thought. He was probably taking in my long explanation and attempting to break it down.

  "Jewel. You don't have to juggle twenty things all the time. The guys and I talked about this long ago, and even with everything that happened, we remind each other over and over again that you're one person. Having six boyfriends is hard, especially with everything that happened. We all have our own insecurities and problems that like to rear their ugly heads into our lives, especially when things are already chaotic. However, none of us expect you to share yourself equally with us."

  Maxi smiled and looked up at the sky. "When you look at the stars, for example. There could be one bright star among thousands, but just because that bright star can't reach the stars that are at the edge of the sky, doesn't mean they're neglected. It's thanks to Logan that we're able to share you to begin with, so we all know you will be close to Logan no matter what. He knows everything about you, just like you know everything about him. And in times of need, he'll always be the first person that would come to your mind. None of us will decide to hate you or Logan because of it. Could be the same as you talking to me right now, or if you talk to Brax, or Kage or anyone. We don't feel neglected or unloved because we can't spend days or hours with you, Jewel."

  He looked at me and smiled, squeezing my hand once more. "It's the little moments that count. Right now, I'm floating on a unicorn float with my girlfriend. To someone like Nixon, his little moment is getting to nap with his arms around you. Braxton loves classes with you because he gets to tease you about showers all day." Maxi winked, and I groaned as my cheeks flushed.

  I allowed him to continue, keeping my comments about Braxton's love of our shower moment in my mind.

  "Kage enjoys explaining all about his familiar knowledge or studying with you every evening. I bet even Zane has a little moment he thinks about. All that matters to us, your boyfriends, is that you're healthy, happy, and loved. Doesn't matter if Logan gives you more love than Braxton, or if Kage takes you out for a date and I don't. As long as we get to see you smile and hear that wonderful laugh of yours, that’s all that matters. Love isn't just dates, gifts, and all the time spent together. Sometimes, you need a bit of space to realize how much you adore a person, so when you get that opportunity to be close to them, you cherish every second of it."

  "So none of you are upset with me?" I worried my bottom lip as I waited for his response.

  "Why would we be? Jewel, you’re fucking amazing. Your mom accidentally signed you up to attend Brighten, an all boys school. Instead of refusing, you not only attended, but thanks to you, so many students who survived last semester aren't being pushed against lockers, sabotaged in changing rooms, and being outright insulted in public. We haven't gotten a chance to show you the number of letters we've received at our dorm thanking you for what you did. People travel from different countries to attend Brighten, and the last thing they need is to be bullied because of their differences. All of us are proud that we get to love and be with a girl who can turn into a guy and bring change and awareness. I know for me, as a person who's dealt with being the victim of bullying, I would have wished there were more people like you." His voice had turned into a whisper by the last part of his statement.

  He pulled my hand, bringing my float to rest against his, and his eyes locked onto mine. "From now on, I want you to understand that we love you. All of us, even Zane. When school starts, everything is going to go fast, and it's going to feel like you’re drowning in work and assignments. We may not have time to have individualized moments alone like these, but our love won't falter. I don't want this to end, and I know the others don't either. So be confident in yourself like you always have, Jewel, and let your instincts help you choose the right path. I'm always here if you need me."

  A tear rolled down my cheek, and I gave him a broad grin. "Thank you, Maxi."

  "I still think Maxi is a weird nickname," he mumbled. He leaned forward, his eyes lowering to my lips. My body moved toward him, and my lips pressed softly to his.

  I pulled my hand out of his to rest on the edge of his float, wanting to be closer to him as our kiss deepened. He groaned and rested his hands on my hips, our blazing kiss making me moan into his mouth.

  He lifted me off the float with ease, and I wrapped my arms around his neck as he leaned back and continued to ravage my mouth. He broke the kiss, leaving a trail of hickeys down my neck and along my left shoulder as he turned his attention to the rest of my body.

  "Maximus," I gasped, my voice breathless as I enjoyed every suck he delivered and the lingering bites that made me tremble with need.

  "Jewel. It's really hard to resist you," Maxi murmured, returning to devour my mouth once more. I'd completely forgotten the fact we weren't on the beach or anything but floating on the unicorn float.

  I pulled back to lift an eyebrow at him. "Hey. We didn't plunge to our deaths."

  He rolled his eyes but laughed. "Magic, Precious." He winked.

  I glance over to see the gold and red magic circles peeking beneath the unicorn float. I laughed, shaking my head. "Smooth, Maxi. Smooth."

  "Anything to get to kiss our Jewel," he replied with a silly grin.

  "GUYS! Dinner!"

  We looked to the shore to see the others. Kage and Logan waved their arms while Brax and Nixon had wide smiles. I searched for Zane, but he wasn't present. Zane's not here.

  "Koa said Zane isn't coming. Since he didn't inform the headmaster or professors about what happened, he has to help clean the school as a punishment with Nick. Guess it's better than being expelled," Alice quiet voice replied.

  Oh...okay. Thanks, Alice.

  "Don't worry, Jewel. You'll get a chance to talk with him during school," Alice suggested. "And you're welcome."

  "What's wrong?" Maxi asked.

  I turned my attention to him and gave him a sheepish smile. "Zane's not coming. He's on cleaning duty for his involvement. Alice just told me."

  Maxi sighed. "I guess it makes sense. Better than being expelled. The headmaster is normally super strict."

  I nodded, but the thought of him all alone in the house while we had the rest of the week to have fun made me sad.

  "Hey," Maxi whispered, cradling my face with his hands. "Don't worry. One step at a time. We'll work this all out soon enough. Alright?"

  "Okay," I replied. He leaned in to give me a tender kiss.

  "I'M HUNGRY, STOP MAKING LOVE TO HER MAXIMUS!" Braxton shouted.

  "I got a picture!" I heard Kage yell out.

  "Hey, that's not bad. Kage, you have to take pictures of all of us!" Logan suggested.

  "Nixon?! Don't sleep on me!" Braxton huffed.

  I snickered, breaking the kiss to laugh at the boys’ loud conversation and Maxi sighed. "You are ALL talking loud on purpose! Leave me and Jewel in-AH!" Maxi started before the magic circles disappeared and we both sank into the water with the unicorn float.

  I gasped, shaking my wet strands as I kept myself
afloat. The guys’ laughter echoed in the night air and Maxi finally popped up, the unicorn float once again upside down and drifting away.

  "Dammit! Next time we're getting those floats that fit six people!" He huffed and ran his hands over his face, removing most of the water.

  "There's seven of us," I pointed out.

  Maximus grinned, swimming over and stopping right in front of me. "Yes, but you'll sit on my lap, so that counts as one."

  I giggled. "If you say so. Just make sure your calculations are right next time."

  "I'm normally excellent at math!" Maximus countered but sealed my reply with another kiss. He pulled back and we shared an intense look.

  "Enjoy this week, Jewel. We'll handle all the other stuff when we get back," he encouraged me earnestly. We glanced toward the others, and I grinned with happiness.

  Yes. I'll just enjoy this moment with my boyfriends and deal with everything when school starts. Zane...I hope you're patient enough to wait for me. I'll learn about you soon enough.

  "You okay?"

  I opened my locker before I glanced at Braxton standing to my right. "I'm fine. Why?" I replied, grabbing the books I needed for our next class.

  The halls were busy, everyone rushing and, to my surprise, no one was lingering outside the classrooms. Now with the new rules, people were cautious. It was already the middle of the first week, and at least twenty students had been expelled from Brighten.

  I guess they assumed Ms. Landsford and the other professors were joking about their initiative to eliminate bullying, but they proved their point on the first day. Now that it was Wednesday, no one wanted to get caught even talking to one another.

  I didn't care to be seen conversing as I knew I wasn't bullying anyone, but I did want to get to class and rest my head for a bit.

  I'd been having annoying headaches all day, and it was starting to get to me. A good power nap before class would make up for it.

  "You're pale, and you looked like you couldn't concentrate last class."

  "I have a headache," I admitted. I tried to close my locker, but Braxton laid his forearm on the door as he gave me a stern look. I let out an annoyed groan.

  "Brax, not today."

  "What did Savannah say?" Brax countered. I rolled my eyes but knew Brax wasn't going to drop it.

  "She said if I wasn't feeling well to see her immediately," I muttered. Brax lifted an eyebrow at me, and I continued. "Especially if I have headaches because it could be a sign that I'm about to have a seizure."

  "Exactly." Brax’s tone was firm as he punctuated the word with a sharp nod.

  "Brax, I KNOW when I'm going to experience a seizure. I don't feel that way," I argued, lifting my hand to ruffle my hair.

  "I know you do, but we don't need to wait for you to 'feel' like you're about to have a seizure before you go see Savannah," Brax scolded.

  "You're acting like Logan."

  "I'm trying to protect you, Jinn. Maybe you're not concerned, but we are," Brax snapped.

  I didn't say anything as I peered into my locker to avoid looking into Brax's green eyes. I sighed, knowing I shouldn't be upset with his concern.

  Braxton had been watching me like a hawk, and it was just his way of protecting me, but I didn't want to worry anyone. My health was my own concern. I didn't feel like I needed to bother other people.

  "I'm just a little irritated today. Sorry," I mumbled. Brax nodded, and I felt his left hand slip in my right.

  "We're in public."

  "I don’t think anyone gives a hoot about either of us right now," Brax countered, squeezing my hand gently. "Plus, can't see our joined hands when we're facing the lockers."

  I pressed my lips together and squeezed his hand back, needing the extra reassurance. Even with my headache, I'd been feeling uneasy, but I couldn't pinpoint why.

  Was it from my dreams? Or was it just a lingering fear of being watched or jumped? I could defend myself just fine, and with all the installments of security cameras, the likelihood of it happening was slim, but it was something to keep in mind when walking the halls alone.

  I wasn't going to depend on the guys to always be with me, especially when I was a guy myself. I needed to handle my shit on my own, just like a guy would.

  "Promise you'll go to the nurse's office before class," Brax whispered.

  I lifted my gaze to look at him. "Kage will worry." I knew the excuse wouldn't get me out of Brax's order, but it was worth a shot.

  Brax grinned, catching onto my attempt. "I'll text him."

  "Fine," I capitulated. Braxton was stubborn, and there was no way I'd get my way.

  "Good," he replied with a quirk to his lips. I glanced to my left, noticing the hall was getting quieter as the number of students walking up and down the hall lessened.

  My eyes caught a glimpse of an orange head, and my heart skipped a beat while my mind pondered if it was the same person with silver eyes.

  "Jinn?"

  I waited for the student to turn and to my relief, it wasn't the person whose presence I still felt was around the school. Could that person be Lark, and is he after me?

  "Jinn," Braxton said again, the hardness of his voice bringing me out of my thoughts. I turned my gaze back toward him, and I noticed how close his face was to mine.

  "Wh...what?" I stuttered. He frowned, glancing in the direction I'd just been staring at before his green eyes locked onto me.

  "Are you still seeing Lark randomly in places?" Brax asked with a low voice. I bit my lip and gave him a little nod.

  "A part of me wants to come to terms with the possibility that I'm seeing things...but this is the fifth time this week, Brax. I told Savannah, and she thinks it could be my anxiety or a hallucination of sorts, but each time I've spotted him, he's looked directly in my eyes...the same way he did when I fell off the tower."

  My lip trembled as I explained, and I squeezed Brax's hand so tightly, I wondered if I'd stop his blood circulation.

  "I haven't told the others, because I don't want them worrying. But...I don't...I..." I let out a frustrated grunt. "As a guy, I shouldn't have to rely on you guys, but I'm freaking the fuck out by keeping this in, and I'm honestly scared to walk to class alone. Stupid right? Like...I can defend myself. Why the fuck am I acting like a 'pussy.' Or that's what all you guys like to say to call us weak."

  "You know pussy is a really poor example of weakness," Brax pointed out which made me chuckle.

  "Ya, ya, pussies can take a pounding."

  Brax leaned in and pressed his forehead against mine. My eyes grew wide, and I desperately wanted to look around to make sure no one was watching. "Brax, we're in the hall."

  "Jewel," he whispered. I froze at his gentle voice while I got lost in his lime green eyes with the beautiful specks of gold that seemed more vivid than usual.

  "Just because you're a guy, doesn't mean you have to feel afraid and alone. Your gut has never steered you wrong, and if you think that Lark is somehow free and walking around school, we won't turn a blind eye to it. He shouldn't be on campus period, but I'll look into it. Understood?"

  "But Brax, you're dealing with a lot."

  "I'm perfectly fine. Now, off to the nurse's office you go," Brax urged. He pulled back with a confident smirk, and I shook my head.

  "I don't know how you do it."

  "Do what?"

  "Make everything somewhat better? You can walk into a situation with no knowledge of what's going on but give such confident answers and deal with the problem at hand like you have all the evidence regarding the situation." I sighed, tension draining from my shoulders and allowing me to relax a little.

  "I'm used to it," Brax said with a small smile, but I noticed the sadness in his eyes. Braxton?

  "Get going." Brax slipped his hand out of mine so I could grab my remaining books. I nodded, snagging one more book before I quickly placed the old texts from earlier that I knew I wouldn't use for today back on the shelf.

  Brax moved to help close th
e door of my locker but put his arm over my shoulder as if to give me a half hug. "Brax? What are you-" I began, turning my head to look at him once more, but his soft lips pressed against mine.

  If it weren’t for the door of my locker and how closely we both stood to the row of gold-tinted lockers, we would undoubtedly be seen kissing. I still was trying to get a grasp on the thought of kissing another guy and doing my best not to get hard from the simple action, but it was harder than I thought. And I wasn't referring to my cock, but it was getting there.

  For a second I let go and kissed him back, my body craving his touch. But just as quickly, I pulled away.

  "Brax! Someone could see," I murmured. He merely grinned as he pulled away and helped close my locker.

  "Don't see anyone," he replied and ever so slowly licked his lips. "Kage should be here in a minute, but I have to head to the other side of the school. You're going to be okay?" he asked.

  I nodded but gave him a confused look as I put my backpack on. "How do you know Kage is coming? You didn't pull out your phone."

  "My familiar told Koa, who told Kage, who's on his way." A wide grin spread across Brax’s face.

  "I've yet to meet your familiar," I grumbled.

  "In time, grasshopper. In time." Brax chuckled and I groaned, punching his arm playfully.

  "Go to class."

  "I'm going, Jinn. Make sure you head straight to the nurse. Kage will tell me." Brax raised his brow, staring me down.

  "Whatever. I hope your three-way communication fails." I raised my chin and huffed, and Braxton merely laughed.

  "See you later, Jinn," he replied, waving his hand as he walked away.

  I looked around, thankful that there was no one left in this section of the hall. I sighed, turned to rest my head against my locker, and lifted my right hand to press my fingers against my lips.

  He doesn't even take into consideration that I'm a guy right now. Ugh...that kiss turned me on though. Damn boy hormones. Wait...boys have hormones, right? I give up.

  "Shouldn't the guaranteed Mage Warrior be getting to class?"