Secrets of Submission

by LK Shaw

  With nothing more to say, I walked out to my car and drove home. When I pulled in, I warily glanced around for any signs of danger. All seemed quiet, so I let myself in the house and crawled in to bed, wanting to forget about everything. I drifted off, only to toss and turn throughout the night with dreams of danger and death.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Marcus

  Immediately after Penny left, I called Donovan and Connor and told them to come over. Even though Donovan had nothing directly to do with Evan, we’d been friends since college, and he knew about Grace and Hailey. I poured myself a finger of whiskey while I waited for them. Donovan arrived first and poured his own whiskey before settling into the wingback chair next to the fireplace in my home office. Once he sat down, he broke the silence, “What’s going on, Marcus?”

  “Fucking Evan Banks is what’s going on,” I shouted, wanting to punch something. Or rather, someone. “Evan was within five feet of Penny today. He was at the coffee shop that Penny goes to and introduced himself to her. He also gave her a message for me. What if he’d hurt her again, Donovan? I know he was the one who almost ran Penny down. He’s sitting back and laughing at the fact that he can fuck with my head, and I can’t do a goddamn thing about it. We both know he’s followed her since I received those pictures along with the various letters. That bastard is a psychopath. I should have known he wouldn’t leave well enough alone. Especially, after he no longer had access to Grace.”

  “I’m sorry, Marcus. I know how much you care about Penny. I wish there was something I could do to help.” I almost winced at the pity I saw in Donovan’s gaze. I didn’t want his fucking pity. I already felt sorry enough for myself without his pity added to the mix. I wanted to fix this and make Evan go away. But my hands were tied. Overtly, he’d done nothing wrong that I could prove. I knew he was the one sending me letters and the one who’d threatened Penny. I was spending thousands of dollars for Connor’s security company to find this son of a bitch and the minute they caught a lead, Evan somehow disappeared again. He always stayed one step ahead of them. Like he knew their every move.

  He didn’t say anything more. We sat there in silence as he nursed his Johnnie Walker. I paced back and forth, sipping on my own drink and running my hand through my hair in frustration and anger, as we waited for Connor. Ten minutes later, he finally arrived. He declined the offered drink and instead took a seat on the couch opposite Donovan.

  Connor broke the silence that descended. “What happened that has you all worked up?”

  Knowing my anger level, Donovan jumped in and explained the situation. I flung myself into my office chair and pounded my fist on the arm rest. “Goddamn it, what am I going to do? This was another warning. He’s taken this game to the next level today, and I can’t afford for things to escalate. We all know he’s not going to quit until he finds Grace. I can’t risk him hurting Penny again. I fucking love that woman.” I froze as the words spilled out of my mouth. I knew they were true, and I didn’t want to take them back. I sat in disbelief that it had taken me this long to admit it.

  Connor cleared his throat uncomfortably. “I believe I’ve discovered why he’s been staying one step ahead of us. I think he has someone inside my agency. Someone who feeds him info. I haven’t narrowed down who it is yet. I’m sorry, Marcus. I feel like Penny getting hurt is partly my fault since whoever the mole is works for me. I swear to you, I’m close to finding out who it is. There will be retribution when I do.”

  After Penny gave me the message from Evan tonight, I knew what needed to be done. I didn’t realize it was going to be this hard or come this soon. I had to do whatever was necessary to protect her, even if it meant breaking her heart, and mine, in the process. Especially since he could have killed her. He was obsessed with Grace and hated me because I was the one keeping him from her. With Grace out of his reach, he’d keep going after Penny until she was dead. Because she had the bad luck of being someone I loved.

  Even Penny almost being run down by the car wasn’t enough evidence for the police. There was no way to prove Evan had been behind the wheel. I could talk with Penny and the police about my suspicions, but I knew from experience it wouldn’t matter. If Evan wanted to get to Penny, he would. The sad thing was, he didn’t give a shit about her. Everything he did was about Grace, even threatening and hurting Penny. He’d almost killed Grace once, even with a restraining order against him. A piece of paper didn’t mean shit. Now he was targeting Penny as a means to fuck with me. If I didn’t get her away from me, he would realize she was my weakness and by hurting her, he’d hurt me. I wasn’t about to let that happen. I had to do whatever it took to protect her.

  “I have to protect her from him. Until you can find the informant and Evan, this isn’t going to go away. I know what needs to be done, but God, this is going to break her.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Penny

  I woke the next morning exhausted, after my argument with Marcus. I was so angry that he wouldn’t tell me what was going on. I thought we’d reached a place of trust in our relationship. I guess that’s where I deluded myself. We didn’t have a relationship. At least not the kind I wanted. Clearly, what we did have wasn’t working, because neither of us fully trusted the other. I wanted to enjoy my last day of vacation, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. This whole situation with Evan kept running through my head.

  I just finished doing laundry when my phone rang. “Hello.”

  “I’m sorry about last night,” were the first words out of his mouth. “Can we put aside our anger for a night? I need to see you. If I remember correctly, our agreement was that you would be available any time I commanded. Unless you want to use your safe word, I’ll be coming over tonight.”

  I hesitated, still hurt that Marcus was keeping secrets from me. But I was in love with this man, and resistance was futile. “Yes, Sir. I’ll be home for you tonight.”

  I sensed the relief behind his response. “Thank you, Sweetness. I’ll see you tonight then.”

  After spending the rest of the day running errands, my hip ached a little. I came home to soak in the tub before he arrived, which helped. Around 7:00, my doorbell rang. I opened the door and let him in. Neither of us said anything as he made his way to the kitchen. I went to the living and turned on the stereo before joining him. With soft music playing in the background, we worked together in the kitchen, but with an awkwardness that had never been between us before tonight. We put together a delicious, easy meal of caesar salad, lasagna, and garlic bread. Several times, he opened his mouth like he wanted to say something. He stopped short of uttering any words though. I set the dining room table and lit the two candles in the middle for a soft, romantic glow to the room. We took the food dishes out and Marcus began plating our meal as I took my seat.

  We ate our meal in an unusual silence. We never seemed to run out of things to talk about until now. Lately, with everything happening, my gut told me Marcus was slipping away from me. He never failed to be attentive in bed, but he seemed more and more tense, especially since the accident. Sipping the Moscato I’d poured myself, I glanced over at him and noticed a far away look in his eye as he picked at his meal. The silence overpowered everything. When it started to drive me insane I had to do something to break it. It was laughable to try and make it less uncomfortable by acting as though the tension between us was non-existent. The idea that if we didn’t talk about it, maybe it would go away wouldn’t continue to work.

  “I’m glad we decided to stay in tonight. With everything going on, I don’t think being at the club right now is a good idea. I’m so tired of fighting with you.”

  Marcus cleared his throat, “I don’t want to fight with you either. I also know you want more than I can give right now.”

  I reached over to clasp his calloused hand, squeezing his fingers in support. “I want you to talk to me. I want to know if there’s anything I can help you with to relieve you of some of your burdens. You do such a
great job taking care of me, that I want to take care of you in return. That’s what people in relationships do, you know. They support each other with whatever is going on in their lives, and help them with any problems they’re having. If you’re having a problem, I want to help.”

  Leaning over, Marcus pulled me out of my chair and into his lap. I snuggled closer, inhaling the familiar woodsy smell, and wrapped my arms around his muscular shoulders. His arms surrounded me, with one arm around my back and the other across the top of my thighs. His fingertips traced invisible patterns on my hip, where a bruise still showed.

  “I appreciate your concern, I do. Honestly, though, it’s better for you if you don’t know. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but that’s the best I can do right now. Now, we’re done talking about this. Are you finished eating, because I’m ready for dessert.”

  Mentally smacking myself on the forehead, I groaned in frustration, “Damn, I forgot dessert. I was going to stop for a coconut custard pie, and it completely slipped my mind. So, unless you’re having a craving for banana ice cream with chocolate and walnuts, you’re out of luck for dessert.”

  He moved his hand from my hip to slip between my legs, and he teased my slit. “This is all the dessert I need right here.” He plunged two fingers inside my weeping sex. Pleasure cascaded through my body at his touch. He never ceased to inflame me with a single brush of his hand or finger. I was so in love with this man that I was always ready for him. He had brought me out of my shell and showed me how it felt to be desired by a man. He never failed to tell me every day how beautiful I was. My confidence soared, and I truly believed I was as beautiful as he said. I had finally learned to love myself.

  My fervent wish every day was that Marcus would realize he was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I just didn’t know if he felt the same. There were times when I swore I saw love in his eyes, but it was always gone before I could be sure. Even if he decided today to end things between us and move on, there would never be another man like him. Never again would I let a man take away my confidence and belief in myself. He’d either fully embrace me and take me as the gorgeous, curvy woman I knew myself to be or he’d be gone. I would never subject myself to another toxic relationship.

  “Make love to me, Sir,” I purred against his ear. I rose up from his lap and threaded our fingers. With only a slight tug, I pulled him to his feet and blew out the candles on the table before leading him to my bedroom. I stood at the foot of my bed and slowly began undressing him. I gently ran my hands up the rock-hard abs and chest I’d exposed inch by glorious inch as I raised his shirt higher and higher before pulling it up over his head. I dropped to my knees and, with great care, unbuttoned then unzipped his pants and lowered them to his ankles as he raised one foot after the other to step out of them. Lovingly, I reached my hand out to clasp the cock that had sprung free of his pants and now stood at attention. With a quick swipe of my tongue, I laved the end, before sucking the full length deep into my mouth. Before I began to fully enjoy myself, Marcus groaned, “Stop,” and pulled me up to my feet.

  “Sir, I wasn’t done,” I complained, giving a mock pout.

  “If you continue your current course, this will be over before it even begins. Now, be quiet and let me enjoy unwrapping my present,” he scolded as he slowly unbuttoned my dress. It was agony waiting as he gently released each button, torturing me with his relaxed pace. I was about to burst and he prolonged my agony by taking his time, but I knew not to rush him. He would go at his own pace and not a second faster, no matter how much I begged and pleaded. I accepted that he controlled things right now.

  He brushed my collarbones as he pushed the material off my shoulders and down my arms. It caught briefly on my hips before cascading down to pool on the floor around my feet. My nipples pebbled beneath my bra in the cool air as his heated gaze skimmed my breasts.

  “You are so beautiful, Penny. I don’t ever want you to forget that. No matter what happens in the future, know that you are a strong, gorgeous woman who deserves only the best in your life.”

  My heart skipped a beat at his words. I also sensed something almost like regret. For some reason, I didn’t want to dig too deep to find out. I wasn’t sure I’d like what I discovered. Later, I would realize I should have dug deeper.

  “You make me feel beautiful, Sir. Never before has anyone done for me what you have. You’ve given me everything I ever needed. More than I ever dreamed. You make me a stronger person. I know you may not want to hear this, but I love you, Marcus.”

  I stared into his green eyes and knew beyond a shadow of doubt that my love was returned. He didn’t respond beyond threading his fingers through my hair, wrapping his other arm around me, and pulling me flush against him. He looked into my eyes for a second longer, and for a brief moment, I thought he was going to say something; instead, he lowered his face to mine and placed the gentlest of kisses on my lips. He kissed my lips again before moving up to my nose and then my eyes as they fluttered shut. He rained soft kisses over my face before returning to my lips where he deepened the kiss.

  He unclasped my bra, and it quickly joined my dress on the floor. He broke the kiss and helped me step out of the puddle of clothing before leading me to and laying me on the bed. He worshipped my body with his touch as he traced his fingertips down my arms to my fingers and back up again. He made his way to my breasts before giving each nipple a slight pinch to increase the pleasure. He followed my breast bone down the middle of my chest, over my belly, and stopped right before he reached the place that ached for him. I closed my eyes as I reveled in his touch.

  “Sir, please,” I begged. I needed him tonight more than ever. I could have been killed the other day, and I didn’t want to waste one second of my life.

  When he didn’t say anything, I peered up at him. His hand shifted to the bruise on my hip as his eyes followed suit. “I’m so sorry you were hurt. I’m sorry I didn’t protect you. I won’t let it happen again.”

  My brows furrowed in confusion at his cryptic words. “Marcus, it wasn’t your fault. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was an accident. Regardless, I don’t want to think about it anymore. Make me forget.” I brought his head down to me and poured all my emotions into the kiss, transferring my love to him.

  When I tried to deepen the kiss, he pulled back a hairsbreadth. “There’s no need to rush, Sweetness. We have all night.” He gentled the kiss, tasting every inch of my mouth, softly, sweetly. We kissed for what seemed like hours as he softly caressed my side, his thumb resting just below my breast. He reached out to grasp my hand and brought my arm up next to my head where he interlaced our fingers. He moved on top of me, and I spread my legs wider to make room for him, never breaking our sensual kiss. This gave him access to my other hand, which he positioned to mimic the other, so both of my arms were bent near my head and our fingers were intertwined together.

  He broke our kiss and stared straight into my eyes, no words spoken between us. With our gazes locked, I felt him shift and his cock slide up and down my slit, becoming wet with my juice, until he reached my pussy. His cock slowly entered me with gentle ease, his eyes never leaving mine. Once he was fully imbedded, I wrapped my legs around his waist as he began to thrust, taking his time, pausing slightly when just the tip was left before pushing back in. With every thrust of his hips I counter thrusted, bringing us as close as two people could get. Every time our pelvises met, the friction increased on my clit.

  We continued our dance, until the pressure that had been building exploded and a kaleidoscope of colors burst across my vision, but I refused to break eye contact. Within seconds of my orgasm rushing over me, I was awash with his seed as Marcus reached his climax right behind mine. On and on tiny tremors continued to rush through our bodies until finally my body relaxed.

  I unlocked my legs from around Marcus, and he rolled to his back, taking me with him. I cuddled up next to him with my arm across his chest and my head rested
on his shoulder. His heartbeat thudded against my hand where it rested on his chest, and I matched my breathing to his until our hearts beat in harmony. I savored the moment until exhaustion overtook me and I drifted off.

  “We need to talk.” I heard the tense voice whisper behind me, as I lay basking in the afterglow of the most beautiful lovemaking I’d ever experienced. I turned my head to peek over my shoulder at Marcus.

  “I should have told you this before last night. I meant to. You looked so beautiful sitting there in the candlelight. The desire to touch you was beyond my control. My body overruled my mind and not touching you was no longer an option. Then one thing led to another. Penny, I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I have some things going on that I need to take care of for a little while. Things I can’t really talk about right now. I wish it were different. When I get everything taken care of, I’ll call you. In the meantime, I think we need to take some time away from each other. Time away will also give you a chance to re-evaluate your feelings. I think you’ll find that they are as I said before, gratitude.”

  I rolled over and my brows and forehead crinkled in confusion. “What are you talking about, Marcus? I don’t understand. Does this have something to do with the accident? Or Evan?”

  Not even looking me in the eyes, he only repeated what he’d said. “I’m sorry, Penny, but I think we need to spend some time apart.”

  When he didn’t say anything further, I realized he was serious. I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. I stopped breathing for a minute and sucked in a shuddered breath when I started again. I fought to bring it under control. I would not let this man see me cry. I was in such shock that all I could do was watch him stand up from the bed and dress. All thought processes stopped. I shook my head back to awareness when what was happening finally started to sink in.