Conflict of Interest

by Jae

  "Yeah?"

  Aiden curled her legs under her. "Yes. I wanted to hear how your week is going."

  "It's been great so far," Dawn announced with enthusiasm. "I met an old friend from college. She's a child psychologist and a family therapist, and she suggested that I work as her co-therapist for a while. I'd mainly work with kids and with teens and young adults who have trouble coming to terms with their sexual orientation."

  "Sounds wonderful." Aiden was glad. She knew that going back to work would be another step toward healing for Dawn. "Do you think you'll do it?"

  "Yes, I will. Working with kids is something I always wanted to try. Maybe I'll go back to working with rape survivors in a few months, but for now, working with kids will pay the bills, and it'll give me a chance to expand my professional horizons. How's your week been?" Dawn asked.

  Three dead bodies, two brutal rapes, and a five-year-old who's been molested by her own father, but I don't think you need to hear that. "Oh, the usual... a lot of paperwork, a few search warrants, and a suspect who puked all over my shoes."

  "Ruined shoes? Then the suggestion I have comes at just the right time," Dawn said with palpable satisfaction.

  Aiden leaned back. "What suggestion is that?"

  "Go shopping with me today."

  Aiden scratched the back of her neck. She had been looking forward to spending the day with Dawn, but shopping?

  "You already have other plans," Dawn concluded when Aiden failed to answer. The disappointment was clear in her voice.

  "No! No, that's not it. It's just... well, I'm not exactly Portland's shopping queen." She looked down at her blue jeans and the tight-fitting T-shirt. "It's not that I don't like fashion. I do, but I don't really have the patience for marathon shopping sprees. Before I'm even through the first clothing store, I always begin to wish that I had my service weapon with me to clear the crowd – or at least to put me out of my misery."

  Dawn laughed. "Oh, now I understand. You're shopaphobic!"

  Aiden chuckled into the receiver. "If that's your professional diagnosis."

  "It is," Dawn agreed gravely. "And it sounds like a severe case."

  "Do you intend to cure my shopaphobia, Doctor?" Aiden smiled to herself.

  "Of course," Dawn said with mock seriousness. "Letting a disorder like that go untreated is against professional ethics, not to mention bad for our city's economy."

  "So, what's the treatment plan?"

  "I'd suggest you join a self-help group, but I fear you won't find another woman who hates shopping in the whole city, so I think I'll try confrontation therapy with you," Dawn decided.

  Aiden lay back on the couch, taking the phone with her. "Confrontation therapy? What exactly does that entail?"

  "The patient is confronted with the phobic stimulus until the fear disappears," Dawn explained, sounding like a textbook, but then added, "or, in your case, until we reach the limit of your credit card; whichever comes first."

  Aiden laughed.

  "Come on, say yes. I'll even throw in an added incentive: you help me find the perfect dress for my cousin's wedding, and I'll help you pick out the rest of your Christmas presents that you haven't bought yet."

  "The rest?" Aiden repeated with a laugh. "In view of that generous offer, I should probably tell you that I haven't bought any Christmas presents yet."

  "Not even one?" That concept was clearly foreign to Dawn.

  "Let me guess. You're one of those people who start looking for Christmas presents in September." Christmas had never been big in the Carlisle household, and since her mother's death, Aiden had only bought small gifts for Ray and his family.

  "No – I start looking in January."

  Aiden smiled. She could see Dawn doing that. Dawn was clearly a person who loved giving presents to other people. "Okay, when and where does my first therapy session start?"

  "Right now?"

  Aiden didn't hesitate. "Okay. Should I come pick you up?" She fully expected the offer to be rebuffed.

  "I won't say no to that this time," Dawn said to her surprise. "We're gonna need the bigger trunk of your car."

  * * *

  "Want me to carry some of that?" Dawn nodded down at the shopping bags Aiden held in both hands.

  Aiden grinned. "No, that's okay." She knew that the offer would be short-lived, anyway. All it would take was one more store and Dawn would pass the bags back to her because she'd need both hands to examine the goods on sale.

  On their way to the exit, they passed the art and handicraft supplies section of the department store. Aiden kept her eyes on Dawn and, as she had expected, saw that Dawn looked back over her shoulder as they walked past. This was the third set of art supplies at which Dawn had thrown longing glances and then quickly walked on with one last, regretful look at the price tag. "Is that a hobby of yours? Painting and drawing?" Aiden asked. She recognized the glances immediately. Her mother had never been able to walk past art supplies without stopping to take a closer look either.

  "Yes, it is... or rather it used to be," Dawn answered. "I haven't picked up a pencil or a brush since... the rape."

  The word was like an electric shock to Aiden's system. She had to force herself not to jerk, not wanting Dawn to think that she had anything to be ashamed of. Sometimes it was hard to remember that Dawn had been raped just two months ago, because most of the time, she seemed so carefree and full of life. Aiden made a mental note to go back later and buy the art supplies for Dawn as a Christmas present.

  "Is the shopping anxiety already easing up some?" Dawn asked when they left the store. They strolled side by side down the street.

  "Well, Doc, all these heavy shopping bags have successfully held my flight reflex in check; that's for sure," Aiden said with a grin. To be honest, their shopping spree had been surprisingly painless for her. She hadn't felt the urge to turn around and head home as she usually did. From time to time, a crowded store would get to be too much for Dawn, who still couldn't stand to be bumped and jostled from all sides by strangers, and she would hold on to Aiden's arm until they reached the closest exit. Aiden found that she didn't mind those moments of closeness at all.

  "That's good, because we still haven't found a dress for me." Dawn directed them into yet another clothing store. Strolling along the racks, she found two dresses that she liked and that had a reasonable price. "I think I'll try these on."

  Aiden didn't want to be left standing in the middle of the store, where the saleswomen would undoubtedly try to talk her into buying something, so she followed Dawn into the general direction of the dressing rooms.

  With a small smile, Dawn closed the curtain between them.

  Aiden waited with her back to the dressing room so she could give Dawn some added privacy. She could also observe the other shoppers and direct anyone who was heading for the small room to another, unoccupied cubicle.

  "Aiden?" Dawn's voice from behind the curtain made Aiden turn around.

  "Yes?"

  "It seems I've lost a little weight. Could you please bring me the blue dress one size smaller?"

  Aiden had noticed the weight loss. There were days when Dawn just had no appetite or her stomach was too upset to eat. Aiden was worried but had decided not to say anything for now. She knew it was important to let Dawn have complete control over her body, even in this. "Sure, I'll be right back," she said. Within a minute, Aiden returned to the cubicle with the smaller dress. She lifted her hand and then hesitated. She wasn't sure if Dawn would be comfortable with being seen half-naked, and she didn't want to push things. "Uh... Dawn? Here's the dress you wanted."

  The curtain moved back a little, and Aiden averted her eyes while she handed Dawn the new dress and received the bigger one in exchange. She waited patiently until Dawn opened the curtain again. She had never seen Dawn in a dress before and couldn't help staring. "Wow, Dawn, that's..." Aiden gesticulated, searching for a fitting adjective and finding none that could convey how she felt.

  Dawn
checked out her image in the full-length mirror and tugged at the hem of the dress that ended slightly above her knees. "You don't think it's a little too tight or maybe a bit too short?" She eyed herself critically.

  "No! It's really nice. It brings out the green of your eyes." The color of her eyes was not the only attribute that the dress accentuated nicely, but Aiden didn't think that she should comment on that.

  Dawn was still looking down her own body when a woman ambled up to them. For a moment Aiden thought that it was the saleswoman wanting to encourage Dawn to buy the dress, but then the woman addressed her, not Dawn. "Well, well, well... if it isn't Aiden Carlisle out and about with her girlfriend. How domestic!" The stranger eyed Dawn with contempt. "And here I thought you didn't do relationships."

  God, please, not now! Aiden groaned internally when she finally recognized the woman. She had picked up the blonde in a bar a few months ago and had promptly forgotten her the next day. Unfortunately, it was apparent that the woman whose name she couldn't remember hadn't forgotten her.

  "Could you help me with the zipper, darling? You'll have to excuse her for a second. She's needed elsewhere," Dawn unexpectedly came to her rescue, directing a sweet smile at the blond woman before she tugged Aiden into the dressing room with her.

  Aiden sank down onto the small stool the second the curtain was closed behind them. "God, I'm so sorry, Dawn!" She rubbed her forehead where a dull throbbing had begun.

  Dawn looked down at her. She didn't appear upset. "It's okay. We all have a past. I didn't expect you not to have had relationships before we started... whatever this is between us."

  Aiden shook her head. "I haven't, not really."

  "Huh?"

  "I haven't been in a relationship for about five years, nothing long-term at least," Aiden admitted. "With my job and everything, it's easier to have one-night stands and short flings without the emotional entanglements."

  When Dawn kept silent, Aiden looked up at her. The psychologist was nibbling on her lower lip. "Dawn?"

  "I can't do that." Dawn sadly shook her head. "I was never one for one-night stands, and I'm sure as hell not up for it now."

  Aiden had known that from the start. "Good, because that's not what I want from you."

  Dawn's head lifted. She studied Aiden's face. "What do you want from me?"

  For a moment, Aiden thought about answering with a joke that would lighten the mood, but then decided against it. Dawn needed her to be honest and express her feelings now even if it was hard for her. "Well, I want to get to know you for a start... everything about you. Can we leave it at that for now?" There were still so many insecurities, and she wasn't ready to allow herself to commit yet.

  Dawn nodded, her eyes and lips smiling once again. "Now, unless you want to watch me change, you should go and try to get rid of your stalker."

  Heat shot through Aiden's cheeks at the thought of watching Dawn change. She was sure that she hadn't blushed so much since puberty. She quickly turned to go. "Okay, I should probably go and tell her that my 'girlfriend' has anger issues, and she tends to take them out on my former... uh... romantic interests."

  When Dawn left the dressing room, Aiden stood alone. Her "former romantic interest" had disappeared. "I'll take the blue one," Dawn announced, waving Aiden toward the check desk. "March on, Sherpa."

  Half an hour later saw Aiden navigating her car through heavy traffic. "Home now, or did you already think up another torture for me?" she asked with a quick glance at Dawn.

  Dawn laughed. "No further tortures... for now," she promised. "But we should drop most of these bags off at my mother's; otherwise Jamie will find her presents when she stays at my apartment. That girl is like a gift-seeking missile."

  Dawn unlocked the door of her mother's apartment while Aiden waited behind her, balancing half a dozen shopping bags in her arms. Aiden stopped in the doorway when she saw Grace coming out of the kitchen. She wasn't sure how Dawn's mother would react to her continued presence in her daughter's life, now that the case was resolved and she lacked an official reason for keeping in contact with her.

  "What's all this?" Grace pointed to the bags and parcels both of them were carrying. "Are you moving back in?"

  Dawn laughed. "No. I went out to buy a dress for Tommy's wedding and a few more Christmas presents, and I managed to con Aiden into helping me."

  Aiden saw Grace's eyebrows arch at the use of her first name. "That was nice of you, Detective," Grace said, her tone carefully neutral.

  Detective, huh? Aiden repeated. I guess she doesn't want me to be just "Aiden" to her daughter.

  "Are you staying for dinner?" Grace asked, mainly in Dawn's direction. "It's almost ready."

  "Yes!" Dawn enthusiastically set her bags down and moved to take Aiden's from her. "I'm starving. You'll stay, too, won't you?"

  Grace nodded. "You're welcome to eat with us," she offered with a little more warmth than before, now that she had recovered from her surprise at seeing Aiden in her home again.

  Aiden shook her head. She wasn't ready to deal with Dawn's mother yet, especially since she wasn't sure exactly where she stood with her. "I think I'll head home now. I still have a few reports to go through." Suddenly, she remembered that running off now would leave Dawn stranded at her mother's. "Should I come back later to drive you home?"

  "No, that's okay," Dawn said. "If I can still move after the tons of dinner I intend to consume, I'll wrap the Christmas presents and just stay here tonight. If you don't have other plans, maybe you could pick me up tomorrow and we could have breakfast or brunch?"

  Aiden looked forward to spending more time with Dawn but felt awkward discussing their plans in front of Grace, so she just nodded mutely.

  Dawn climbed over the shopping bags blocking her way and stepped closer to Aiden. She softly touched her forearm. "I had fun today."

  "Me too," Aiden agreed, uncomfortably looking back and forth between Dawn and her mother. She did not dare to hug her under the watchful eyes of Grace Kinsley. "So, I'll see you tomorrow?"

  Dawn nodded. "Tomorrow."

  * * *

  With a satisfied sigh, Ray let the last report of the day sail down into his outbox. "Hey Aiden, want to come home with me?" he said across his desk.

  "If this is your subtle way of trying to pick up a woman, it's been too long for you, Bennet," Jeff Okada commented from his own desk.

  Ray grimaced but ignored him and continued to look at his partner, who was still bent over her work. "The girls told me to ask you. Susan is trying out a new recipe, and they don't want to suffer through it alone." He grinned invitingly. "So? You'll come?"

  Aiden sat back and looked at him. "As promising as that sounds, I can't."

  "You're not on call, are you?"

  "No." Aiden signed her report and threw it into the outbox on her desk. "I have previous plans."

  Ray felt his eyebrows climb upward. This was the third time in the last two weeks that he'd heard that particular answer when he had asked his bachelor partner to join him for a drink or family dinner. "Do these plans include anyone I know?" he asked, studying her face.

  "Perhaps."

  It was clear to Ray that she didn't want to lie to him but was equally uncomfortable discussing it. He would respect that. For now.

  Okada knew no such restraint. "Please tell me it's not that mama's boy from the public defender's office that's been sniffing around you for the last few months."

  "C'mon, get serious!" His partner Ruben rolled his eyes. "She's got better taste than you."

  Okada smoothed back his hair. "I'll have you know that –"

  "Cool down, guys!" Aiden ordered. "And please find something else to discuss other than my private life."

  The simple fact that Aiden even had a private life was amazing enough to Ray, but he kept quiet and trusted that his partner would confide in him when she was ready to.

  CHAPTER 25

  THE SHRILL RINGING of her phone almost made Dawn fall from the couch
. In her haste to reach the phone before it stopped ringing, she stumbled over her nephew's building blocks. "D..." She caught herself just in time as she remembered that she had underage company. "Dumb toys." She snatched up the receiver. "Kinsley."

  "Hi, Dawn," Aiden's cheerful voice answered. "How's the kiddie shrink business?"

  Dawn laughed and sank back onto the couch. They had talked on the phone at least every other day and as a result were much more at ease with each other. Dawn was happy about that and hoped that this easy, comfortable interaction would eventually transfer to their face-to-face meetings. "It's going really well, thank you. Are you done with playing the bad cop for today?"