EG01 - When One Door Closes

by Joan Jonker

  ‘I wish we had one of those vacuum cleaners. I believe they get rid of the dirt in no time.’

  ‘When me and Bob are married, we’ll buy you one.’

  ‘I’ve managed with a stiff brush all me life, so it won’t kill me.’ Martha looked at her daughter with deep affection. She knew Mary would give her the world if she could. ‘What time d’you want me to call you?’

  ‘Eight o’clock, if you’re awake.’

  Martha groaned as they went through the living room. ‘Fancy having to come down to that! Still, we’re lucky compared to some poor souls.’

  Mary climbed the stairs behind her mother. ‘Aren’t you glad you stood in a queue for that fish today? Otherwise we’d be having conny-onny butties for our dinner.’

  Holding on to the bannister, Martha turned. ‘There’s plenty would be glad of conny-onny butties! When I was a girl, condensed milk was considered a luxury.’

  ‘You won’t forget to wake me, will you, Mam?’

  Martha faced her across the landing, ‘Will you stop worrying! I’ll wake you in plenty of time.’

  As she slipped between the sheets, Mary had so much on her mind she didn’t think she’d sleep. But sheer exhaustion took over, and within seconds of laying her head on the pillow she fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

  Chapter Five

  Martha stood looking down on the sleeping form of her daughter. The sheet was pulled over Mary’s face and all that could be seen was the blonde hair spread across the pillow. Her breathing was deep and even, and Martha was reluctant to wake her. But she’d promised to call her at eight o’clock and it was nine now. ‘Come on, lass! It’s time to wake up.’

  Mary shot up in bed, her eyes blinking rapidly. ‘What time is it?’

  ‘Nine o’clock! I came up at eight, but you were in such a good sleep I didn’t have the heart to wake you.’

  ‘But I never get up till nine when I’m on afternoons.’ Her eyes full of sleep, Mary peered at her mother. ‘What have you got that old mob cap on for?’ She leaned closer. ‘Your face is all black!’

  ‘I’ve been dragging the carpet out into the yard to try and shake some of the soot out of it.’ Seeing Mary’s puzzled expression, Martha reminded her. ‘You wanted to go and see if the Wests are all right.’

  Mary’s eyes widened as the full horror of last night came flooding back. ‘Oh, my God, I must have been dead to the world!’ She threw the bedclothes back and leapt out of bed. ‘Have you been up long, Mam?’

  ‘I couldn’t sleep with all the noise, so I got up about five. I thought I might as well be doing something as lying in bed. I went out to the front to talk to some of the neighbours, but they haven’t heard anything. Their houses are all like ours, but at least they’re in one piece.’

  Mary threw a dress on the bed. ‘Will you be an angel, Mam, and make us some toast while I have a swill and get dressed?’ Ten minutes later when she walked through the living room she was surprised to see most of the soot cleared from the floor. ‘You haven’t half been busy!’

  Martha’s face looked drawn under the streaks of dirt. Dragging the carpet out to the yard had taken all the strength from her. ‘It’ll take weeks to get rid of the soot from the couch and chairs. And I can’t do anything about the walls and ceiling! I tried brushing it off, but I only made matters worse. The whole room will have to be stripped and decorated.’

  ‘I think you’ve done wonders! At least we won’t be breathing and eating the stuff all the time.’

  ‘How you slept through the noise I’ll never know.’ Martha hadn’t closed her eyes. ‘They must have been pulling houses down, and every time one collapsed the whole foundation of this shook and I expected it to come down on me.’

  Seeing the tiredness, Mary tried to cheer her up. ‘Mam, you look like Granny Grunt in that mob cap! You look as though you’ve been up the chimney.’

  ‘I didn’t need to!’ The smile was weak, but it was there. ‘There was more soot in this room than up the chimney! We won’t need the sweep for a long time.’

  Mary struggled into her coat. ‘I’ll be as quick as I can, then I can give you a hand. Unless you want to come with me?’

  ‘No thanks! I’ll have something ready for your dinner when you get back. But be careful, lass! They say there’s unexploded bombs around.’

  ‘OK, Mrs Mop! I’ll be careful.’

  Mary closed the door behind her and stepped into the street. Small groups of neighbours were standing talking, and their serious faces made Mary’s heart beat rapidly. Please God, she prayed, let the Wests be safe. And Eileen and the kids.

  Their next door neighbour, Vera Jackson, was standing at the door and she gave Mary a thin smile. ‘Some night, wasn’t it?’

  ‘You’re not joking!’ Mary walked up to her sighing. ‘I’m going to see if the Wests are all right. You haven’t heard anything have you, Vera?’

  ‘I haven’t, love! I spent most of the night trying to clear away some of the soot.’

  ‘So has me mam.’ Mary swung the gas mask over her shoulder. ‘I’d better get going, ’cos I’ve got to go to work this afternoon.’

  Mary waved to some of the people as she ran down the street but didn’t stop to talk. She kept up the pace until she reached the building which used to be a small Mission hall, but since the war started had been used as headquarters for the Home Guard. Breathless, she pushed the door open and stepped inside. The room was crowded and noisy. Women with children clinging to their skirts were crying loudly, while others looked frightened and bewildered. Mary recognised Annie Callaghan, who lived next door to Bob, and she was crying on her husband’s shoulder. Oh, God, if they were in trouble, then so were the Wests!

  In the far corner of the room a man was sitting behind a desk talking to a group of people, and Mary pushed her way towards him. Impatiently moving from one foot to the other, she waited for the people to move away then stood in front of the desk. The man was in khaki uniform, and when he looked up Mary could see tiredness and despair on his face.

  ‘Can I help you, Miss?’

  ‘I’m trying to find out about Mr and Mrs West, from Bray Street. The streets are cordoned off and I can’t get through.’

  For the first time that morning the man had something to smile about. He had a pretty girl standing in front of him and good news to give for a change.

  ‘Oh, Bob West’s all right! In fact he’s here now, in the back room. I’ll give him a shout.’

  Mary blew out a sigh of relief as she watched the man open a side door and yell, ‘Bob! There’s a young lady to see you!’

  Bob’s dad came through the door looking drawn and weary. His face was covered in black streaks and his clothes were crumpled and dirty. He was a lot smaller than his son, but in features they were very much alike. He smiled when he saw Mary and she rushed to throw her arms around him. ‘Oh, am I glad to see you! We’ve been worried to death because we thought your street had been bombed.’

  ‘It was, lass!’ Bob West let out a long drawn out sigh. ‘Our house got a direct hit. It’s been completely gutted.’ Tears came to his eyes and he wiped them away with the back of his hand. ‘I was on fire duty, and Mam, thank God, had gone down to the shelter. It’s a blessing she did, because she’d have been killed for sure if she’d been in the house.’

  Mary was stunned. Her voice a whisper, she asked, ‘Where is she now? Why didn’t she come to us?’

  ‘She’s at her niece’s.’ He looked ready to drop from exhaustion.

  ‘I’ve got to wait till the fires die down before I can get near enough to see if there’s anything to salvage. But from what I’ve seen there won’t be anything to save! Funny, isn’t it, lass, but we’ve lost everything, and all Mam’s worried about are the photographs we’ve had in the family for years, and our insurance policies. I don’t think what’s happened has sunk in yet.’

  ‘Have you tried to let Bob know?’

  ‘I contacted the Army base early this morning and asked if he could
come home on compassionate leave. I hope to God he can, because his mam needs him now.’

  ‘He’ll get home!’ Mary tried to sound confident. ‘They can’t have shipped him out yet.’ She released her hold on him. ‘D’you know if Eileen’s all right?’

  ‘They were all with Lily in the shelter, thank God! Their house is intact too, because it was our end that caught it. Our house got the direct hit, but the ones either side had to be pulled down because they were dangerous. The next street got it worse than ours, and the men are still sifting through the ruins. It’s a terrible job because the fires are still smouldering, and there’s a danger of gas explosions.’

  ‘I’ll be going to work at one o’clock, but you know if you and Mrs West want to come to our house you’ll be more than welcome.’

  ‘I know that, love! But I think Mam is better at Joyce’s. She’s in a terrible state, and I can’t think properly meself at the moment.’ He shook his head. ‘I haven’t said anything to her, but where are we going to find somewhere to live? And even if we got a house, what would we use for furniture? We’ve lost everything we had!’

  Mary didn’t answer. If she opened her mouth she knew she’d start to cry. She watched Bob’s dad wipe a hand across his face, spreading the streaks already there. ‘It’s hard to take in, love, that the home you’ve had for thirty years is gone in a matter of seconds. All the things we’ve gathered together over those thirty years, wiped out in a flash. I just hope our Bob gets home, otherwise I don’t think the wife will be able to cope.’

  Mary swallowed to move the lump in her throat. ‘The main thing is you and Mrs West are safe.’

  ‘I keep telling meself that, but it doesn’t help.’ He put his hand on Mary’s arm. ‘I’ll have to go, love! There’s not enough men as it is, because they’ve all been sent down to the docks. I only came in for a cup of tea, and I’ll have to get back to let one of the other lads have a break.’

  ‘Will you let me know what’s happening?’ Mary begged. ‘If Bob comes home he won’t know where you are.’

  ‘I’ll let your mam know, I promise.’

  Mary gave him a quick kiss before weaving her way through the crowded room. Some of the people she brushed against wouldn’t be leaving the building as relieved as she was. It was terrible that the Wests had lost their home, but at least they were alive!

  ‘D’you think Bob will get home?’ Martha toyed with the fish on her plate. Her appetite had gone since hearing about the Wests.

  ‘I hope so! They can’t have shipped him out already.’ Mary didn’t feel hungry either, but she wasn’t going to waste the fish after her mam had stood in a queue to get it. ‘Surely they can’t refuse compassionate leave under the circumstances!’

  ‘Why don’t you take the day off?’ Martha asked. ‘You’ve never taken one day’s unofficial leave since you’ve been there.’

  ‘I’ll wait and see if Bob gets home. If he does, I’ll take a few days off so I can go round to Joyce’s. He won’t be able to come here much, because his mam will want him with her.’

  ‘I should think she would! She must be in a right state!’ Martha started to stack the dishes. ‘You’d better get a move on if you don’t want to be late.’

  As Mary reached for her coat, Martha added, ‘Hurry home tonight, in case Gerry starts.’

  ‘OK, boss! I’ll run all the way like little Red Riding Hood.’

  Walking past the streets that were cordoned off, Mary could see people standing in front of empty spaces where only yesterday houses had stood. Some were crying, while others just stared as though they couldn’t believe what had happened. Mary had been walking slowly, now she reminded herself that if she didn’t hurry she’d miss the bus. She quickened her pace but as she neared the Black Bull she saw the bus pulling away and had to wait fifteen minutes for the next. There were only a few travelling on the late bus so Mary had a seat to herself for the twenty-minute journey. Looking out of the window she was surprised that the further away from Aintree they travelled the more normal everything seemed. Even when she reached the factory it looked just like any other day, with latecomers like herself rushing to clock in on time. It didn’t seem real that everything here looked exactly the same as it had yesterday, when only a few miles away there was such devastation.

  It was only when Mary pushed open the cloakroom door that she realised things were far from normal. There weren’t nearly as many women there as usual, and those that were there were clustered around Maisie Phillips who was sobbing her heart out. Her face was red and blotchy and her make-up wiped away by the sodden handkerchief she held to her eyes. Ethel Hignet had an arm round her friend’s shoulder and her own face bore signs of recent tears. ‘They’re bastards!’ she spat the words out.

  ‘Yer can say that again!’ Eileen’s voice rang out. ‘If I had my way I’d shoot the bloody lot of them!’ She caught sight of Mary standing just inside the door and came towards her. ‘Yer all right, kid? When yer weren’t on the bus, I got worried.’

  ‘I missed our bus and had to wait for the next.’ Mary nodded towards Maisie. ‘What’s wrong?’

  ‘Her sister’s ’usband got killed last night.’ Eileen ran her fingers through her hair in an action that said she was lost for words. ‘He was at Spellow Lane when a bomb dropped.’

  ‘Oh, my God!’ Mary whispered. ‘Isn’t that terrible!’ ‘He ’ad two kids, too.’ Eileen snorted. ‘It’s gettin’ to be as dangerous for civilians as it is for soldiers now.’

  ‘Why didn’t Maisie stay off?’

  ‘The two kids were evacuated to Wales, and someone’s gone down to bring them back. After tonight, Maisie’s takin’ a week off to help Florrie.’

  Harry Sedgemoor’s head appeared round the cloakroom door. ‘I’m sorry, girls, but it’s time to be by your machines. The morning shift are waiting to go home.’ He held the door open as the women filed past, then watched as Mary tied the turban round her hair. As she and Eileen walked past him, he let the door swing after them. ‘You and your mam all right, Mary?’

  ‘Yes, thanks, Harry,’ Mary answered briefly then turned to Eileen. ‘You were with Mrs West last night, weren’t you?’

  ‘Don’t remind me, kid! I’ve never been so frightened in all me life! I really thought we were all goners in that shelter. And poor Mrs West … I felt so sorry for her. She was like a raving lunatic!’

  ‘Who wouldn’t be if they’d lost everything like she has?’

  ‘I know, kid! It’s enough to drive yer insane!’

  They were sitting in the canteen and Eileen was speaking through a mouthful of bread. ‘No one knows what’s in store for them, an’ I suppose it’s just as well we don’t. Otherwise we’d be putting a shilling in the gas meter and stickin’ our heads in the oven.’

  Mary pushed a stray curl under her turban. ‘It seemed like the whole of Liverpool got it last night.’

  ‘They reckon it’s the worst night we’ve had! London got it the worst, but from what I’ve heard Liverpool got a real pasting too! They say a lot of the big shops in town were hit, and Paradise Street’s in ruins.’

  Mary sighed as she scraped her chair back. ‘Come on, back to the grind for another four hours.’

  Eileen heaved her body from the too small canteen chair. ‘Thank God I’ve got me two days off to look forward to! Two glorious, bloody days!’

  ‘Mr West came, lass, but there’s no word of Bob.’ Martha watched her daughter’s shoulders slump and she tutted impatiently. ‘I think you forget he’s in the Army! He can’t just pack his bags when he wants to.’ She bustled towards the kitchen. ‘There’s only powdered egg for supper because I was afraid to go out in case I missed Mr West.’

  After supper they sat on the couch with their cups of tea. There was no fire lit tonight because the weather was warm, but Mary missed the cheerful glow.

  ‘Did you listen to ITMA?’

  Martha pulled a face. ‘I don’t know whether it was me not being in the mood, but it didn’t seem as fu
nny tonight. It was probably looking at the state of these walls.’

  ‘Eileen said her house is in a right mess, too!’ Mary grinned. ‘At least that’s what she meant, but she didn’t use the word “mess”. Anyway, she’s got two days off now, so it’ll give her time to clean up.’

  ‘She’s certainly got her hands full! I don’t know how she manages to be so cheerful all the time.’

  ‘She’s a marvel, Mam! Honest, she’s always …’ The wail of the siren cut off Mary’s words as mother and daughter jumped with fright. The cup on Martha’s saucer was rattling as she groaned, ‘Oh, no, not again! I don’t think I could stand another night like last night.’

  Watching her mother’s face drain of colour, Mary stood up and took the cup from her. ‘Come on! Back to the hole in the ground! That place is beginning to feel like home.’

  ‘It must be a false alarm!’ Fred Smith shone the torch on his wrist. ‘It’s twelve o’clock!’

  ‘No such luck! They’re around somewhere.’ Elsie sounded as pessimistic as she always looked. ‘Any minute now and they’ll be here, mark my words.’

  She’d no sooner finished speaking than the ack-ack guns started up, and they could hear the drone of planes. ‘Why didn’t you keep your mouth shut?’ Fred growled. ‘Proper bloody Jonah, you are!’

  ‘Let’s have a song.’ Mary slipped her arm across her mother’s shoulders. ‘Eileen said they sing every night in the big shelter, and it helps pass the time.’

  ‘Yeah!’ Tommy’s voice piped up. ‘What shall we sing, Mary?’

  The whistling of a falling bomb stopped Mary from answering. She sat with bated breath waiting for the bomb to reach its target, and heard her mother give out a long shuddering sigh just before the explosion shook the shelter.

  ‘That wasn’t too close.’ Fred always spoke in a whisper, as though he was afraid the German pilots could hear him. ‘I’d say that was a few miles away.’

  Mary suddenly felt the full weight of her mother’s body leaning against her, then it slumped forward and fell across her knee. ‘What’s the matter, Mam? Have you dropped something?’ When there was no answer Mary started to panic. ‘Mr Smith, there’s something wrong with me mam! She’s not moving!’