Friday, May 27 We were up early, so we could be ready for our trip. Jess surprised me by asking me to
help her pick out something cute to wear, and then asking for help
with her hair. She is not usually a girly girl at all. I mean it was fun
and all, and great to see her like that, but knowing I didn't have anyone
to dress up for made it hard.
“Why are you so nervous?” I heard Tony ask. They were on the front porch. I didn’t hear an answer, so I assume she shrugged or something. I assume it’s Teresa. “Just chill.”
I pulled my skirt straight, then reached up and fluffed Jessica’s hair up, it was flat on the back. I then shoved her through the bedroom door as the doorbell rang. Jess looked at me, asking without asking if I had heard them. I nodded.
“Jessica.” Mrs. Sloan shouted. She spun and saw us right behind her. “Oh!” She stepped back away from us. “Don’t do that! You scared me.”
“Sorry.” I said.
“Do you two need any extra money to take along?” “Um, no Mrs. Sloan. Peggy.” I said. She knows I have a bunch
of money.
“You girls have a good time.”
“Later.” Jess said.
“When will you be back?” Mrs. Sloan asked. Peggy. She did
ask me to call her Peggy.
“Whenever.” Jess said.
“Late?”
“Probably.” Jess said, sounding irritated.
“Remember, you have to be back by eleven.”
Oh great, they’re still on this curfew thing. It’s sort of funny. I lived alone since before her great-grandparents were born, and she wants me to be in by eleven. Her and Mr. Sloan... Ted, they have this really peculiar view of me. Everyone thinks I’m a kid now. It’s annoying.
“I’m Teresa.” the girl who had been bouncing from one foot to the other said. She gave a little wave and smiled a little before averting her eyes.
“Hi. I’m Brynne.”
“Yeah, so now that everyone knows everyone else, can we get going?” Jess asked. Please tell me everyone isn’t going to be in a bad mood all day. I don’t think I can handle that. I feel a lot better today than I have in previous days, and I’m pretty sure I have enough strength to take them all down.
Tony hurried to the car, and Jess climbed into the front with him. So I get to sit in back with my new best friend. Thanks Jessica, I really appreciate this. Ya know, I wonder if she is trying to find me a new friend so she doesn't have to spend much time with me.
On the two hour trip we played a game. Tony would switch the radio to a new station and then the first person to guess the singer would get a point, and then one point for the song title. Jess was awful at it. Tony wasn’t much better. Teresa was beating me by quite a bit. I had thirty-five points, she had forty-three. At least I didn’t have six, like Jess, or eight, like Tony.
I can’t believe she beat me. The girl is good. She’s a perky little thing, once she gets past her nervousness from being around new people. One of those bouncy, smiley people. She’s got fashion sense, too.
“Where to first?” Jess asked. We were just inside the entrance to the mall.
“Ooh, over here.” Teresa said. She was pointing toward a store with all sorts of trendy jewelry in the window.
“I want to go look for some new jeans.” Jess said.
“So go.” Teresa said. “Come on, Brynne.”
She grabbed my hand and pulled me away from Jess and Tony. I shrugged and shook my head in Jess’s direction, and she laughed as I disappeared into the crowd.
“OMG!” Teresa said. Yes, she actually spelled it out like that. She grabbed a necklace with pandas on it. “This is really cute.” “I guess.”
“Oh, you should get this.” she said. She grabbed a multistranded gold and silver necklace. It is pretty. She held it up to my neck. “Oh, this would look so good on you.”
She kept on like that. She has so much energy, it’s ridiculous. And she likes bows and ribbons. And she likes bows and ribbons on me. It’s sort of weird. We went from store to store, picking out really girly frilly things, and laughing at silly things that didn’t go together, and I had such a blast. I never had this with Jess. I love Jessica dearly, but she never filled my need for a girly friend. Jess is almost tomboyish.
We met up with Jess and Tony for lunch at the food court. They were there before us, and they had pizza. I headed across the to the pizza place and Teresa grabbed my hand.
“Where are you going?” she asked.
“I was going to get...”
“I don’t want pizza.” she whined. She gave me this pouty look.
“Let’s get tacos.”
“Go ahead and get whatever you want.”
“I don’t want to stand in line alone!” She pulled on me. “Come
on.” She’s so weird. Funny, but weird. So we got tacos and then joined Tony and Jess. I was listening to them talk about where they had been, a music store and an electronics store. Every time I looked back toward the table to reach for my taco, Teresa was smiling at me, and then she’d look away quickly and turn red. I wonder what she’s thinking that is embarrassing her.
“We should go look at new televisions.” I told Jess. “Yeah, we need to get one for our room.” Jess told me. “But I wanted to go see a movie.” Teresa said to me. “Come with me.”
“Jess wants to get a new...”
“So! She doesn’t need you to help her pick out a TV.” “I just...”
“Please, Brynne. Please.” She’s pleading with her eyes. Kind
of a sad puppy look. “I really want to go see a movie.”
“Go ahead.” Jess said. She was holding in a smile. Jess is being sort of smug. She talked about me and Teresa being best friends right off, and now she thinks we are. I like Teresa, she’s fun to hang out with, but she’s a bit draining. And I actually do want to spend some time with Jessica, since she really is my best friend. But I do live with her, and I get to see her all the time.
“Please, Brynne?” Teresa said. Her hand was on my arm, and she was waiting for an answer.
“Ter, leave her alone.” Tony said.
“Butt out.” Jess whispered to him.
“I’ll love you forever.” Teresa said.
“Fine,” I said, giving in. “I guess.”
“Yes!”
So now I have a new friend that is way, way too committed to being friends. Sort of clingy, can’t stand to be away from me for five seconds. Great. Well... I guess I shouldn’t make such an assumption, ‘cause I’ve only known her for a few hours. This could just be the way she is around new friends. Maybe by the end of the day the new will wear off and I’ll be able to do things like go to the bathroom without someone tagging along.
I gave Jess some money to get a TV, then Teresa and I hurried to the theater. We waited in line, and when we tried to get our tickets the guy wouldn’t sell them to us. The movie Teresa wanted to see is rated R. So rather than going and finding Jess, she made me watch a PG movie with her. A penguin movie.
The movie wasn’t that good. The penguins were cute, I guess. Just as the movie was starting, she grabbed my hand and patted it with her other hand. She said it had been so long since she had seen a movie. And then I didn’t get my hand back.
I was finally beginning to shake off the huge blind spot I had all day by the time we were driving back to Hanton. This was a set up. Jess had decided to tell this girl, Tony’s cousin Teresa, all about me and talk me up, then set us up on a blind date of sorts. And Teresa knew it all day long, and I’m just now figuring it out. Because I’ve never been out with a girl that was interested in me like that.
When we got into town I started having this slight panic attack about the possibility that Teresa would think we should have a goodnight kiss or something when they dropped us at Jess’s house. She didn’t. She just said bye and that she’d call me tomorrow.
I was holding back my temper as best I could. It helped
that I had several bags in my hands, so I couldn’t choke Jess. She had a new TV in her arms anyway, and I wouldn’t want to break it. But when the front door was closed, and Tony and his cousin Teresa were gone, I had to let Jess know my feelings about what she did.
“I can’t believe you did that!” I shouted at her.
“Did what?”
“You know what.”
“What’s going on here?” Peggy asked. “What did you do,
Jessica?”
“I didn’t do anything!” She sounds offended. As if she had any
right.
“You set me up!” I turned to Peggy. “This wasn’t a shopping
trip, it was a blind date.”
“It wasn’t.”
“Jessica,” Peggy said in her ‘you better tell the truth’ voice. “Hey, I didn’t ever set up a date, okay. I just put the two of
them together and let nature take its course.”
“You set me up.” I complained again.
“Yeah, well, you weren’t complaining when you two were
holding hands and smiling at each other.”
“I had no idea what was going on until we were almost back to
town!”
“Maybe not consciously.” “I... what, you think you can just turn me into a lesbian?” “I’m not trying to turn you into anything, honey.” she said.
She’s got that look, the one people get when they have to explain
something very elementary to a child. “You’re the one that said you
almost went out with a girl before. I figured since you don’t seem very
interested in any of the boys around here right now, maybe you’d like
her. She’s seriously a flaming lesbian, so it sort of works.” “Jessica, you can’t do that to people.” Peggy told her. “You
can’t just trick them like that.”
“Sor-ry.” she said. “I figured there was a good chance I was
wrong, I had no idea they’d be so happy together. Seriously, Brynne,
I’ve never seen you smiling and laughing so much.”
“I... well I thought we were just having fun.” I said. “So just have fun with her. I’m not telling you that you have to
do anything. If you only want to be friends with her, then just be
friends with her. If you never want to see her again, don’t. I tried.” “Yeah, well, she’s calling tomorrow to ask me to go do
something.”
“So tell her to get lost if you want.” she said, shrugging. “I... I mean...” What do I mean? “She’s too nice, I don’t want
to upset her.”
“Uh-huh.” Jess said. That smug smile was back.
“What?”
“Brynne, honey,” Peggy said. She put her hand on my shoulder
and gave a little bit of a smile. “Don’t be embarrassed if you are
interested in this girl.”
“I never said... I didn’t say I was.”
“She’s a very cute girl. You could do a lot worse.” “So now you’re on her side?” I asked, waving my hand in
Jessica's direction.
“No, I’m on your side. I’m on the side of you doing what feels
right for you. And if that’s going out with this girl, great. If it’s not,
just be nice and let her down easy.”
“Yeah, ‘cause she’s totally into you.” Jess added.
“I’m going to bed.” I said.
I stomped up the stairs and threw the bags of clothes on the floor. I can’t believe she would do this to me. She’s my best friend, but I’m so pissed right now! I’m shaking. I’m so angry that I’m actually shaking.
I didn’t even change or wash before climbing into bed. I’ll probably have to do both after I calm down. I’m probably getting makeup all over the pillow.
“Jenna, why did she do this to me? I thought she was my best friend. I thought I could trust her.” Just not with one certain secret. And now I’m not sure what to do. I don’t want to hurt Teresa. She’s a great girl, and I had so much fun with her. We have so many things in common. I thought we could be really good friends, but now I don’t know. Would she be okay with just being friends?
“Brynne.” Jess said. She rubbed my back. “Honey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“Leave me alone.” Great, I’m crying again.
“I should have told you. I was just trying to help.”
“Help what?” I sat up. “Help me feel like an idiot?”
“What? No, I just know you feel left out and alone and you want someone who loves you.”
“And so you trick me?”
“I didn’t even think I was doing anything like that, okay? I just wanted to see if you’d be interested in her.”
“But you told her?”
“Yeah, she knew. She was sort of pushing for it.”
“Well that explains a lot about how she was acting today.”
“Will you please forgive me? I’ll call her and explain that you aren’t into girls, that you aren’t interested in her.”
“So you think it’s okay to just upset her? I mean I think she’d be upset.”
“I don’t know how to avoid that now.” she said.
Great. I don’t know how to avoid that, either. Thinking back on the day, it’s pretty obvious that she really likes me. That she’s really attracted to me. So how do I tell her to go away without hurting her?
“But I don’t want her upset. I like her, Jess. We had such a great time today, and she doesn’t deserve that.”
“So what are you saying?”
“I don’t know!” I stuck my hand up, kind of a ‘sorry, I’m
trying to calm down’ gesture. “You just... I’m so confused now.” I really am. “Okay.” She climbed up the ladder and sat next to me. “Confused about what?” She put her arm around my shoulders. “Confused because you might actually like her?” I nodded and looked away from her. “It’s okay if you do. Really.”
“But... I’m not sure, okay. I’ve never had that kind of fun with anyone. We just clicked. And... it didn’t really feel like just friends kind of clicking, ya know?” Which I hadn’t realized until I thought about it for a few minutes. I glanced up and she was smiling. “And stop being so happy about this!”
“Sorry.” “I’m not saying I’m interested in her. I just... I don’t know what I feel, okay?”
“So you’re more than a century old, and you’re just now getting around to questioning your sexual orientation?”
“I’m not saying... I don’t know what I’m saying.”
“And you’ve never even thought of other girls? Never been attracted to any?”
“I... I don’t know.”
Of course I have. Okay, Brynne, time to stop lying to yourself and everyone else. You've known this for over a century now, isn't it time to trust someone with this secret? And if not Jess, who?
“I guess I have.” I admitted.
“You never told me.” she said, after a moment.
“Sorry.” I whispered.
“You have nothing to be sorry about.”
“Should I go away?” I asked, another sob rising up. “I better
leave.”
“Don't be ridiculous. Nothing has changed.”
“You're not... like, it doesn't bother you that I... I mean I'm...
I'm... gay?”
“It doesn't matter to me, Brynne. You are my best friend, and if
you're happy then I'm happy. You like her, don't you?” she said. “I don't know yet. Maybe.” I admitted.
“Well sleep on it. And when she calls tomorrow, go hang out
with her. If you’re not interested, tell her that. If you are, tell her so.
And if you’re not sure, just tell her.”
“I...” I took a deep breath. “I just don't know if I like her yet.
At least not like that.”
“It will all be okay as long as you'r
e honest with her and tell
her...”
“I...” I nodded.
“You okay?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Good.” She hugged me. “I love you, Brynne. You know that,
right?”
“I love you too. And I'm sorry I lied.”
“About what?”
“I said before that I wasn't gay. I just...”
“No reason to apologize, honey.”
“I just hadn't ever... like, admitted it before. I mean when I was
growing up it just... it wasn't acceptable at all.”
“It's okay now. I just want the best for you, and I don't care if
you're gay or straight, as long as you're happy.”
After showering and changing I laid in bed, thinking about Teresa. She is really, really cute. Especially the way her hair curls up around her face. She’s so bubbly and so much fun. I feel different when I’m around her. But I barely know her. I don't know what to think right now.
Saturday, May 28
Teresa called just after breakfast. I was still chewing on the last piece of bacon, actually.
Ted brought the phone to me and I took it and finished chewing.
“Hello.” I said. “How are you this wonderful morning?” she asked, her cheeriness this early making my head hurt.
“Pretty good.” I said. “And you?”
“I am fabulous. So you wanna do something today?”
“I hadn’t thought much...”
“Well I’ll come over in a few minutes and we can figure it out then.”
“Um, hang on.”
I held the phone down and covered it with my hand. Everyone is looking at me. Barney is just plain staring, Jess is kind of watching in a curious, but not nosy way, and Ted and Peggy are sneaking peaks out of the side of their eyes.
“Is it, um, okay if Teresa comes over?” “Brynne, it’s okay for you to have a friend or two over during the day, you don’t need to ask.” Ted said.
“There won’t be any arguments, will there?” Peggy asked.
She looked over at Jess, like maybe she was waiting for Jessica to apologize for what happened last night, or maybe say she didn’t think she did anything wrong. And I guess it wasn’t, really. She was trying to help.
“Teresa? Hey, yeah, come on over.”
Brynne, Non-Vampire (The Non-Vampire Series) Page 10