by Renea Porter
“Mustang Sally. Really?” He arches his eyebrow at me.
“Yes, that is her name. And this handsome fellow is Billy. We rescued him, as well as Mustang Sally,” I say, petting the horse. “He is a little wilder than Sally.”
Layne runs his hand over Billy’s black mane. By the noises Billy is making, I think he likes Layne. “Sorry about my dad earlier. Sometimes he thinks he’s a comedian,” I tell him.
“I’m sure he is. Was her referencing to Chase?”
“Yes, he was. My family likes Chase, but I made it perfectly clear we were just friends. My parents just like to play matchmaker sometimes without knowing anything else. I actually had to tell my mom that I had feeling for someone else, in order to get her to stop,” I say as we walk through the other side of the barn.
“You told your mom about me?” he asks with a smile.
“Yes, I did.”
He places his arm around my shoulders. “Awe, I feel loved.”
“Very funny. Next, I’m taking you to a very special private place. It’s my most favorite place to go. Especially if I’m feeling down I think you’ll love it.” I turn my head and smile. We walk a little farther into the wooded area and then like magic appears the lake. It is seriously my heaven. “Here we are.” I extend my arms out, motioning to the lake. “This is my own little hidden gem,” I say.
“Wow. It’s so peaceful here, and the view is amazing,” he says as he looks around. “And I have the girl of my dreams here too, this day can’t get any better.” He pulls me into him, wrapping his arms around my waist. His lips lightly graze mine and our tongues dance together, while he runs his hand over my back. I pull away for a second to catch my breath and he motions for us to sit in the grassy area. I sit in front of him with my back against his chest, and he wraps his arms around me while I tilt my head back on his shoulder. We sit in silence for a long time just enjoying the view of the lake. Summer is in full swing all around us; wild flowers are popping out of the ground, birds are singing, and the love of two young lovers is in the air, mixing with nature. “What am I going to do without you?” he murmurs in my ear. I barely hear his words. It’s almost like he was thinking out loud and the words just slipped out.
“You’ll move on that’s what people do. The world doesn’t stop. It keeps going, and will yours,” I say with a soft tone to my voice.
“That is unthinkable. I can’t even think about moving on. We need each other, like fire needs water. I need you,” he says in my ear. My eyes water at his comment. There is a slight calmness to his voice. His words are touch my soul.
“I’m at peace with the decision I made. I’m glad it’s out there in the open now and there are no more secrets being held by either of us. I think it was me that needed you all along,” I say, quickly wiping the tears from my cheek. He tilts his head down kissing my cheek so many times that it causes me to giggle.
“So you could do chemo if you wanted?” he asks.
“I could, but I’ve done it twice already, and it kept coming back. I just don’t want to wear my body down again. It’s painful. It will just come back and keep coming back until my body can’t take anymore. And the doctor told me I would have a year to live if I didn’t do it. I was at the age that I could make my own decisions about it, and I just decided not to do chemo, and to live my last year the way I wanted to live it. My parents were okay with the decision after a little while,” I tell him as we continue to sit on the grass.
“I can understand your thinking behind your decision. How about we just make it the best summer ever?” he suggests.
“Sounds like a great idea. And no more tears,” I announce. “You know what, I think it’s probably been an hour, and we agreed to meet up with Renee and Dylan,” I tell him.
“You’re right, but we have to come back here, for some private time.”
When we walk back, I point out the cow pasture off in the distance, and then they moo at us, causing us to laugh. “Oh and I’ll warn you now; my mom lives in the kitchen, so don’t be surprised if she pushes food on you. Just don’t ever refuse it. You don’t have to eat it all, but don’t offend her by not taking it. She does it out of love, and she loves to have company. It’s been a long time since we’ve entertained, until recently. And as you’ve witnessed my dad has a weird sense of humor.” I laugh.
He nudges my arm with his. “Thanks for letting me know.”
We walk back to the house hand in hand, and we stop inside my house before meeting Renee and Dylan. “Surprise!” everyone yells as Layne and I walk in. “Happy Birthday!”
“Oh my god, I can’t believe you guys,” I say in astonishment. Everyone is gathered round the table, including Renee and Dylan, with a cake lit with twenty candles on it. They sing Happy Birthday as my cheeks turn red. Taking a deep breath I blow the candles out, and I have to blow once more to blow some out. Layne is watching me, and he’s showing off his dimples by smiling at me. Everyone claps, and my mom starts passing around cake slices.
“Our girl is the big 2-0!”
I can’t help but giggle with delight. Everyone is smiling and having a good time as we are all cramped in the kitchen, but this is one of those moments that you live for, one that you would never forget, being with the ones you love the most. This is the life. Everyone I hold dear to me is in this very room and I couldn’t be happier.
*****
It’s been nearly a week since Layne, Renee, and Dylan have been here. They did end up going back to the dorms to get clothes for the summer, but they came back that very same day. Layne and I have snuck in some couple time, giving Renee and Dylan theirs as well.
“I have a surprise for you,” Layne says as we walk around the property.
“You do? What is it?”
“It’s a surprise. Come with me and I’ll show you,” he motions.
We walk hand in hand through the barn and walk in the wooded area to the lake. As soon as the lake comes into full view, I see it. “You made that?” I ask, pointing at the tire swing hanging from the tree.
“Yeah. Your Dad even lent me the tire, and helped when I did it,” he says with a sparkle in his eye.
“Can we use it now?” I ask shyly. The weather has turned hot; it is sure to be a scorcher this summer.
“I’ll meet you in there.” He strips down to his boxers and swings across the grass and jumps right into the water, making a big splash. “Come on; the water’s nice,” he says, flashing his dimples.
As many times as I‘ve come here I’ve never gotten into the water. “Come on. It’s okay,” he says, motioning with his hand for me to jump in. I strip down to my bra and underwear, swing on the rope and jump in as I scream. Layne comes over to me and pulls me into him. I wrap my legs around his waist and kiss him. He slips his tongue inside while gripping my thighs against him. His fingers dig into my skin, and I’m in a sweet bliss I never want to leave. “I love you, so fucking much it hurts,” he pulls back to say.
I place a hand on each side of his face and gaze into his brown eyes. “I love you, too, so fucking much.” I can feel his hard erection against me, and I want him so bad right now. “God, I want to feel you inside me; like right now,” I say breathlessly.
Without skipping a beat, he walks toward water’s edge, and we climb back up to the grassy area. He lays his shirt and shorts down for me to lie on. The spot is pretty secluded so we don’t have to worry about being seen. I lie down on my back and he climbs up my body. His lips cover mine and our tongues tangle as our hands search the other’s body. His back is so muscular and wide, his abs are taunt, and he has that sexy V going on down there. His muscled legs entangle with mine and we take our time. He looks at me for the go ahead to slide inside me and I give him a nod, assuring him.
This time, he is gentle when he slides inside me. He takes his time, making me feel every bit of him inside me. He leans down, sucking on each hard nipple and giving each one the right amount of attention. He presses further inside me, causing a moan to escape
from deep within. I cry out his name when he sends me over the edge, and my body shutters as the wave of ecstasy takes over. Layne soon follows my lead and moans into a sweet bliss that only lovers share.
Standing up, we slide our clothes back on, and I feel my nausea setting in and I rush over to the tree and get sick. I’m so embarrassed that Layne has to see this. He approaches, but I try to wave my hand to shoo him away. He reaches over and rubs my back, and it helps calm me. One last wave rushes over me and I stand up to catch my breath. I take a few minutes standing in place, getting my heart beat back to normalcy, while Layne just watches me with a close eye.
“Is this what happens?” he asks with concerned eyes.
I nod yes. “Maybe it isn’t a good idea for you to be here after all,” I tell him, feeling frustrated. I stomp through the wooded area ahead of him. How was that for a knife in the heart? I’m mad at myself for letting things get to this point. How could I be so stupid?
He rushes up behind me and spins me around. “You honestly think I’m just gonna leave that easily? Do I not mean anything to you? Does what we just did mean anything to you?” His brows are furrowed and he looks just as frustrated as I am.
“It will only get worse. I don’t want you to remember me like that,” I point at the tree, reminding him I was just sick.
“When I look at that tree, I think of us jumping in the water, and for a little while you were carefree, and you enjoyed yourself. We made love, Amber. That’s what I see. And we are in this together. We are a team, a family, a couple, whatever, but we are in it together,” he says with a harsh tone. “Just how many times do I have to fucking tell you that?” he says, grabbing my shoulders while looking into my eyes.
“This afternoon meant the world to me, but I love you enough to let you go,” I say. “But I’d hate myself if you did leave. I just can’t stand being sick, and you seeing me like this,” I tell him as we continue to walk.
“We’ll get through it, together,” he says, bringing my hand up as he kisses it.
Chapter Twenty Five
Back at the house, we walk inside to find Mom making dinner. And she’s insisting everyone is to come. Normally, she would deliver food upstairs or has me take it outside.
“I want everyone to wash up. We are going to have a formal dinner this evening,” Mom announces. Layne and I go upstairs to tell Renee and Dylan.
“Knock, knock! Are you decent,” I ask, announcing Layne and I.
“Yes, we’re decent,” she says with a laugh.
“My mom is making dinner and is insisting on everyone’s presence,” I tell them both.
Honestly, I have no idea where everyone will sit, because we don’t have that many chairs at the table, but she has plenty of good china. Eventually, everyone comes in, and mom instructs everyone like a drill sergeant. Apparently, three chairs magically appeared and everyone will be squeezing around the table after all. She’s cooked enough for an army. There are dinner rolls, homemade mashed potatoes, pot roast, and plenty of veggies to go around; as well as homemade gravy. We’re all gathered around this table, eating off fine china for no apparent reason, other than Mom wants to. I know she loves having people around the house, and she spoils us. Layne is sitting next to me and his hand has made its way on my thigh. Just having him near me does crazy things to me.
My sister decides to share her struggles with drugs with everyone at the table. They are hanging on her every word, listening and asking questions. “I’ve also decided to enroll in night classes this fall,” she says bashfully.
“That is amazing! I’m so proud of you,” I tell her. I walk over to her and hug her. “I’m so happy for you.”
“What are you going to major in?” Layne asks.
“I’m really thinking about nursing. It would take up a lot of free time, so I wouldn’t be getting into trouble. Plus, I’d love to be able to help people,” she beams.
“You should go for it,” Renee says.
“We’re very proud of you, Sarah,” Mom says, smiling.
After dinner, we all pitch in to help clear the table, because Mom deserves to kick her feet up. “Who likes smores?” I ask, rubbing my palms together while licking my lips.
Everyone answers me in unison. “How about you boys get the bonfire going out back and grab some sticks, and we will bring out the food?” I say, and Layne flashes me a wink. “Okay, here we go,” I say, locating the graham crackers, Hershey bars, and marshmallows.
“Oh I’m so excited,” Renee says as I hand her some of the stuff.
“You and Dad are free to join us,” I say to Mom as we pass through the room, sliding the glass doors open.
“Oh, you guys go on ahead,” she says as she sits next to Dad on the couch.
I nod and walk outside. “Here we go,” I say unloading everything. The pit is far enough away from the house so any noise we make won’t bother my parents not that it would, but still. We position the lawn chairs around the fire. Layne is on my right while my sister is on my left and Renee is next to her, with Dylan directly across from me. Of course the two guys sit next to each other. Layne leans over to kiss me, and then we put the huge marshmallows on the stick.
“It’s good having you home,” my sister says, looking over at me, as she’s holding her stick over the fire.
“I can’t say it’s good to be home, but I’m glad we are all together, making memories that are worth remembering,” I tell her with a smile.
“Agreed,” she says, nodding.
We are making the smores and getting the marshmallows all over us, even licking our fingers as they make a mess. “These are good,” Dylan says, getting chocolate all over his face.
“I’ll go grab us some napkins,” I say, standing up. My mom comes into the kitchen as I grab some napkins.
“You’re definitely gonna need a lot of those,” she points.
“Thanks. Hey I have a question, but you can totally say no, and I will understand. But I was wondering if you guys would mind if Layne slept in my room.” I make a cringe face, feeling slightly embarrassed asking such a thing.
“Like, in your bed?” She makes an exaggerated gasp.
“Yes, in my bed,” I say. “It won’t be every night; I think he wants to give Renee and Dylan some alone time,” I tell her.
“Uh huh, okay, I guess it’s okay.” She shrugs like it’s no big deal, and walks out of the room.
“Alright, here you go.” I pass the napkins around to everyone. We all make another one by putting another marshmallow over the fire.
“I asked Amber to marry me,” Layne blurts out.
“Wait, what?” Both Renee and Sarah ask.
He smiles. “I asked her to marry me. Of course she said no, though. But the offer is still on the table,” he says, turning to me.
“You are fucking nuts if you think I’m going to marry you. Especially at this point and time,” I say.
“Wow, I don’t even know what to say. I’m just at a loss for words right now,” Sarah says with a shocked look.
“Me too,” Renee agrees. “Layne, you are crazy,” she says.
“I drive a race car, so this is nothing new.”
We all nod in agreement. “Will you two ever have to race against each other?” I ask, referring to him and Dylan.
“Maybe one day, but it’s all good,” he says. Dylan comes over and they high five each other. Boys! The girls and I just shake our heads’.
Leaning over in my chair, I whisper to Layne. “You are sleeping in my bed tonight,” I say with a grin.
His eyebrows raise. “Oh, am I.”
“Yep.” I nod. “I didn’t think you would mind.”
“I don’t mind at all,” he says, flashing his deep dimples. He has on the same black tank top on that he had on the night I met him and he still looks just as delicious. “I’m probably cramping their style, anyway,” he says nodding toward Renee and Dylan.
“Well it won’t be every night, cause us girls need some time to ourselves,
too,” Sarah leans over my chair to tell Layne.
Sarah is so cute. She is a petite little blonde with big blue eyes, and she isn’t afraid to say what she’s thinking. I don’t know how our looks turned out so opposite, but she never had any trouble with boys while in school.
“Well, she’s mine tonight,” Layne says. “Speaking of which, maybe we should cut out.” He nods toward the house.
I can’t deny him. “I think we are going to head inside, but you guys are free to stay out here as long as you like,” I say as Layne and I stand up. We all agree to go out for breakfast in the morning, so we can give Mom a break, even though she loves to feed us. Layne leads us by taking my hand.
Inside my room, he shuts the door immediately after we walk in and presses me against the door. He takes my face in his hands and kisses my lips ever so gently and tender. We can’t rip our clothes off fast enough as we move to the bed. My body is fighting against me and becoming weaker, and Layne notices.
“We don’t have to do it tonight, if you just want to rest. It’s okay,” he says.
“I really want to, though; I’m just not sure my body will cooperate.
“Here, lean against me. Just holding you right now in my arms is enough,” he says, turning on his side so my back is against his hard chest. I take his arm and wrap it around my waist, so he holds me tight.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, not knowing if he heard me or not.
“Hey. You have nothing to be sorry for. I love you. If we make love that’s fine, if not that’s fine, too. I promise,” he says, adding a kiss to my bare shoulder.
“Sorry, my bed is small. I know you probably feel cramped,” I tell him.
“No, I get to sleep close to you. I like having you against me; feeling your body against mine is comforting somehow. I probably sound like a damn pussy, but I don’t care.”
I giggle at his comment.
“I still love you,” I tell him, leaning over to kiss him. I turn to face him and wrap my legs with his. “You’re going to miss a lot of racing time,” I say, looking up.