Remind Me, Master [The Martinis and Chocolate Book Club 5] (Siren Publishing Everlasting Classic)

by Lara Valentine

  She pulled out of his arms and sat back down on the bed, her shoulders hunched. “You don’t think I’m good enough?”

  He sat down on the bed next to her, his arm around her shoulders. “How would I know? I know zilch about art. I just want you to be sure about what you’re getting yourself into. It will be a lot of work and stress. Are you sure you want to put yourself through that?”

  She lifted her chin, her heart squeezing in her chest. “I do. I appreciate you wanting to protect me, but I’m a grown woman who can handle a little bit of work and stress.” She grabbed his hand. “I want you to go with me. I’ve already talked to Brianne and she can keep the kids. It can be that second honeymoon we talked about a few nights ago. I know it’s not Hawaii, but New York isn’t chopped liver. We could eat at 21 and walk through Central Park looking at the autumn leaves, maybe see a show. What do you say, handsome?”

  She already knew his answer from the look on his face. He shook his head. “I can’t. Work is crazy. I’ve already handed off cases so I can be home every night. If you really want to do this, you’ll have to go alone.”

  Was he hoping she would give in and stay home? He was going to be disappointed if so.

  She nodded. “Then I’ll go alone. I wish you could go, but I understand.”

  She did the best she could to hide her disappointment. She’d counted on Conor wanting to accompany her. The trip would still be exciting, but it wouldn’t be the same. The man she loved wouldn’t be there to share this with her. She felt a frisson of fear run through her that this new relationship wasn’t going to work. She’d wanted it to so badly, but she had to face the fact that Conor may simply not be able to change. Maybe she couldn’t change either. She shook off her fear and straightened her spine with determination. She wouldn’t, couldn’t, give up on them.

  “I’ll purchase my ticket and book my hotel room then. I leave a week from today. I’ll firm up the plans with Brianne. I’ll only be gone a week.”

  Conor looked like he wanted to say something, but instead he turned and went back into the bathroom. She heard the sounds of him brushing his teeth as she slumped on the bed.

  She was going to make sure this show of her work was successful. She wanted Conor to be proud of her.

  * * * *

  Miller’s breath was warm on her neck as his rough fingertips stroked her arm. Tammy wanted him to kiss her, was desperate for it. They’d spent every moment of every day together this last week, working on the presentation for the clients. She couldn’t believe he didn’t feel the heat simmering between them. Their chemistry would be explosive, she was sure. She snuggled closer to him on the couch, the bare feet brushing sending tingles to her fingers and toes.

  Maybe he’s shy.

  Perhaps he was the type to let her make the first move? It wasn’t her usual style, but for him she could make an exception. She took a deep breath and tried to gather her courage, but the ringing of the doorbell made her sag against the cushions.

  A reprieve.

  She definitely wasn’t the aggressor type and the doorbell may have been the universe telling her she needed to be more patient with him. Miller hopped to his feet and pulled open the door with a happy grin, pulling the person through the door and giving them a big hug. It was obvious Miller had great affection for their visitor.

  Her first glimpse of him almost took her breath away. He must have been what people thought of when they used the words “tall, dark, and handsome.” His hair was jet black, his eyes a dark brown. He wore jeans that hung low on lean hips and a flat stomach, a black T-shirt. His arms were decorated with colorful tattoos which gave her an unexpected urge to trace them with her tongue. From his fingers dangled a black helmet, on his feet heavy leather boots. Her pussy started to drip honey at the biker fantasy come to life in the doorway.

  Holy crap, that is one fine bad boy.

  Miller pulled the man further into the room. “Tammy, I want you to meet my boyfriend, Sam. Sam, this is the Tammy I’ve been telling you about.”

  It took a second for the words to register. His boyfriend.

  Well, shit.

  She shook the man’s hand and swore steam actually rose where their hands met. Sam didn’t smile but looked her up and down, and not like a guy who was gay. He was looking at her like he wanted to get her naked.

  “Miller’s told me a lot about you, Tammy. You’re even sexier than he said.”

  Sam dropped his helmet on the kitchen table. “So, have you gotten her to bed yet?”

  Miller turned red. “Shit, Sam. Cool it. Tammy’s a nice girl.”

  Sam leaned against the table, oozing sex from every pore. “Nice girls like sex. Do you like sex, Tammy? How would you like to have sex with both of us?”

  Tammy swallowed and tried to speak but words wouldn’t come. Miller shoved Sam’s shoulder.

  “Cool it, Romeo. She’s not attracted to us that way. Leave her alone.”

  Sam’s eyes narrowed, taking in her obviously shocked expression.

  “Tammy hasn’t said one way or the other.”

  She pinched herself to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.

  Ouch, that hurt.

  She may never get a chance like this again.

  She lifted her chin. “I like sex.” She looked from Sam to Miller, then back to Sam. “Where’s the bedroom?”

  Sara laughed with delight. “I like this girl. She’s a lucky, lucky girl. I should know.”

  Lisa, Brianne, and Sara were sitting in Lisa’s kitchen having their book-club meeting. Noelle and Cam were on a getaway, just the two of them, Serena had to work, and Tori was on her honeymoon. The Montana ladies weren’t attending every book-club meeting by Skype. They were having their own meetings weekly and meeting with the larger club once a month.

  Brianne got up and poured them all more wine. “We’re all pretty lucky. Our men are terrific. Of course, I wouldn’t know what it was like to have two men, but Nate is plenty for me.” She rummaged through the chocolate box and finally selected a truffle. “So did you get your plane ticket and the hotel room squared away?”

  Lisa nodded. “I did. It’s all happening so fast.”

  “It’s too bad Conor can’t go with you. That would have been a nice vacation for the two of you,” Sara said.

  Lisa pursed her lips. The whole subject was a complex one. “It would have been nice. Conor…well, Conor seems to be having some issues with my going to New York.”

  Brianne frowned. “He asked you not to go? Shit, did he go all Master on you and tell you not to go?” Her lips pressed together. “Asshole.”

  Lisa shook her head. “No. No way. Conor would never do that. He just doesn’t seem as happy as I am about this. He’s never said he didn’t want me to go. He’s…really calm about the whole thing, that’s all.”

  Sara sipped her wine. “Isn’t Conor known for being calm all the time? You’re always telling me what a rock he is. After all, this isn’t happening to him, it’s happening to you. It’s only natural you would be more excited than he is.”

  “It’s happening to both of us, for both of us.”

  Brianne put her hand on Lisa’s. “No, it’s not. It’s happening for you. Yes, it affects Conor and the kids, but this is about you. About your work. When Conor wins a case, he wins a case. You don’t win it with him. When you sell a sculpture, you sell it. You share in the reward, but the experience is really your own.”

  Tears started to well in her eyes. “I feel so badly for Conor right now. I see what he’s going through and I can’t help him with it.”

  Sara looked confused. “I don’t understand. What’s Conor going through?”

  Lisa wiped at her eyes. “Everything is changing on him. Conor fucking hates change. He hates not being able to control the world around him. Personally, I blame his father for this, although it could be his personality as well.” She twirled her wine glass. “His dad is sick and Conor can’t make him better. He’s going to have to watch his father deteriorate
. It’s the last straw in a series of things that are slowly driving Conor to behavior we wouldn’t normally see.”

  “What do you mean the last straw?” Brianne asked.

  “Things are changing around him and he can’t control it. I’ve changed, Nate’s changed, the kids are growing up and are less and less influenced by us and more by their friends. Heck, his assistant Naomi doesn’t even take his crap. When I threw his clothes on the front porch it was to get his attention and get him to face that life was moving on without him. He was hiding at the office, avoiding having to deal with things.”

  Sara grinned. “You got his attention. He gathered up his clothes and straightened up, right?”

  “He did. But this thing with his dad has knocked him back again. If that hadn’t happened, I think he would have been more happy for me. Taken it more in stride. It’s all just too much for him.”

  “Wow, you really know your husband,” Sara said.

  Lisa waved away the compliment. “Don’t be all that impressed. Conor’s like so many men. His needs are simple. He never felt secure when he was growing up. His dad never treated him well. So, he craves security and love now. I wasn’t a psych major for nothing.” Lisa grinned, but it quickly faded. “I can’t help him with this. He needs to deal with it himself. He needs to come to terms with his father. It’s time. He’s been dancing around about it for years.”

  “I’m afraid to ask,” Sara said slowly, “but just how screwed up is Conor’s relationship with his dad?”

  Brianne groaned. “Like screwed the pooch. Their father is a real piece of work.”

  “When Conor graduated law school, I was so proud of him. He was so proud of himself. His father came to the ceremony but only grilled Conor about what law firms had offered him jobs. Never said a nice word to him. Fast forward a few years when Nate graduated medical school. Conor had to watch while his dad hugged Nate and told him what a great job he had done. It tore my heart out to see Conor have to endure that.”

  Brianne’s expression was horrified. “I never knew that. Nate said his dad never treated Conor well in some lame attempt to make him a man who could take over the family if he had to, but, oh my God, I never knew that.”

  Lisa looked away, staring out the kitchen window, playing back that day in her mind. “Conor never said a word about it. Not. A. Fucking. Word. God, I love that man.” She turned back to them. “I think he’s figured out that with his father’s Alzheimer’s, the chance of ever getting his father’s approval or having any sort of relationship with him is well, not in the cards. He’s got to make peace with that. He’s got to make peace with the fact he can’t control it. Or me. Or anyone else.”

  She took a deep breath. “Then and only then, will Conor be able to be one-hundred-percent in this marriage. Until then, my job is to love him, support him, and be patient. It’s only a matter of time.”

  Lisa took a gulp of her wine. “You know the funny thing that came out of this? Conor is the man his father wanted him to be. Conor will take over leading this family when his father can’t any longer.”

  Sara sat back in her chair. “You’re a saint to deal with this.”

  Lisa laughed. “No, I’m just a wife. A wife who’s sure her husband will come around. He’s too smart not to do it. I’ve seen how close he’s come in the last few weeks. He’s almost there. Lord knows, I’ve dropped enough hints and pushed him in that direction. He just has to take the last few steps himself.”

  Lisa knew he would. It might not be tomorrow or the next day, but he would certainly take them. She would be waiting at the finish line.

  * * * *

  He fucking missed Lisa.

  She’d only left the day before but already there was a gaping hole in his life and heart where she had been. She’d called when her plane had touched down at JFK and then again when she was checked in at the hotel in Times Square. She’d sounded excited, anxious, and a little sad. She’d wanted him to be there with her, but his schedule was too crazy. If only she’d given him a little more notice he might have been able to make it work.

  He leaned back in the leather chair and stared out the office window ten stories above the street, a full moon hanging over the city of Clearwater and lighting up the sky. His cell phone ringing interrupted his brooding. He glanced at the screen and hit the Accept button.

  “Hey, Nate. What’s going on?”

  He could hear the kids in the background and felt even more alone. Brianne and Nate were watching his kids so he could be an asshole and work all hours of the day while Lisa was gone. He glanced at the file folders stacked on his desk. There would always be work to be done. It sure as hell wasn’t going anywhere. He could spend twenty-four hours a day in the office for the next week and the work would still be there. It was a blessing and a curse.

  “Brianne made lasagna for dinner. Are you coming over?”

  Conor let his gaze linger on the framed wedding photo on his desk. He’d never thought he could love a woman more than he did the day he married Lisa, but how he felt now blew it away. They’d both been so damn young. They’d finished their bachelor degrees and Conor had been about to start law school the summer they married. Lisa had given up her dream of being a psychologist to put him through school, working at a crappy clerical job she loathed. They’d treated her like dirt, and he’d hated that she’d had to go every day. But she’d done it. Because she loved him and believed in him. He’d always felt it was the least he could do to spoil her now.

  “I’m still at the office. You should eat without me.”

  “You don’t want to have dinner with your kids?”

  “Shit, Nate. Don’t tell me you don’t work late and on weekends because that would be a fucking lie. You work as crazy hours as I do, asshole.”

  “I work those hours when I have to. I don’t hide out at the office like you do. I like coming home to my family.”

  “What the fuck? I love my family.” Conor was starting to get pissed at his baby brother.

  “I’m not saying you don’t love them. I’m saying it’s easier to be at the office. It is, isn’t it? At least admit that, brother. You’re lord god king wrapped up in gold there. No one questions you, no one tells you to take out the garbage, and sure as fuck no one talks back. And they say doctors have a god complex. Shit, you have a bigger god complex than I do.”

  Conor felt the anger churn in his gut. His brother was spouting shit just to get him riled up.

  “Fuck you, Nate.”

  Nate’s laughter came loud and clear through the phone.

  “That’s all you got? Fuck you? Fine, stay at the office where you have absolute control over absolutely everything. You’ll be safe there. Safe and alone. You’re so much like Dad sometimes.”

  Conor stiffened. “I’m nothing like Dad.”

  Nate snorted. “Bullshit. That’s why you and Dad butt heads like you do. You both like everything your way. I’m like that, too, although not as much as you. Do you think it’s an accident we both ended up as Dominants?”

  Conor had often wondered if it was something genetic. He’d always liked to run the show, even when he was a kid in school.

  Conor took a long drink from the bottle of water on his desk as Nate continued. “We didn’t have much control growing up because Dad needed all the control. As we grew older, we gravitated toward professions that would give us control and women who would be submissive to us. I’m sure there’s a Dominant streak in our DNA as well, don’t get me wrong, but you and I are a product of our upbringing.”

  “You’ve given this a great deal of thought, little brother.”

  “With everything going on with Dad, I guess I have.” Nate paused. “So is this how you intend to live your life? Using work as a shield from anything you can’t control and dominate?”

  Conor pondered that question. As much as he hated to admit it, Nate had made some valid points. As the kids had grown older, he’d spent more time in the office. He’d blamed it on the crappy economy
but crime never takes a rest no matter what the Dow Jones Industrial says. His practice was more successful than ever.

  It had only served to make Lisa more independent, which was an ironic twist. Yet, he couldn’t be unhappy about it. He was so fucking proud of her he wanted to climb to the top of the building and yell it across the entire Tampa Bay area.

  When she’d given him the news, it was as if some alien had taken over his body and forced him to say shit he didn’t mean. Even as he was saying the words, he knew they were wrong. He’d hidden behind being concerned for Lisa, but the fact was the only person he’d been concerned with was himself.

  “I’m scared.”

  He thought Nate might laugh at him, but there was only silence on the other end of the phone. Nate simply waited for Conor to keep talking, knowing there was more to be said.

  “I’m scared of losing her, okay? I know that sounds stupid, but it’s true. Suddenly, I had the overwhelming need to keep her close to me. I’m not proud of it.”

  He was so ashamed of himself. Lisa deserved a better husband, and better Dominant, than he’d been lately.

  “You tried to manipulate your wife. I can’t imagine Lisa putting up with that.”

  Lisa was his submissive, but she had never been his doormat. She’d always had an inner strength that Conor admired. Her spirit was strong, and she’d shown it time and time again. She was the nucleus of their family.

  Tears stung the back of Conor’s eyes, and he was glad for the cloak of darkness in the office.

  “She didn’t get mad. She just seemed sad I wasn’t going with her.”

  “Are you afraid to say you’re sorry? That would be a good start if you haven’t already done that.”

  Conor shook his head in frustration even though there was no one to see his gesture. “It’s not enough. What if I do it again? I have to make things better. I can’t lose Lisa. She’s my whole damn life.”

  “Can I give you some advice? Because I think you really need some. Stop fucking saying Lisa’s important to you, and start fucking acting like it. Your problem is you’ve had everything too easy. Lisa’s loved you since the moment you met. You’ve never had to work for her love, never had to win it. Well, life just handed you the reality check. Time to pay your tab. You want to make Lisa happy, then fucking put her first and keep putting her first. Not for a day or a week, but for a lifetime. If you don’t, I can guarantee you someone else will.”