Her Online Addiction

by Ruby McQueen

  And Ezra. I can’t get the way he looked at me tonight out of my head, and it’s true, if it wasn’t for Derek, I would have been super excited about Ezra. Smart, goofy, hot, tattoos and an edge. Lord only knows why I’m such a sucker for ink, but things like long hair, body ink, ear spacers, different cultures etcetera all make people interesting to me. Individual with a unique flavour.

  I rinse the conditioner and body wash from my body before stepping out onto my bathroom mat to towel off. I decide to put everything behind me and put on a movie. I usually go for something martial arts, but in light of my new friends’ appearance and my need to switch my whirling mind off from hyper drive I opt for something creepy instead. I put ‘Insidious’ into my DVD player, as it’s recently made my top ten for supernatural thriller/horror movies. I go to get Ermac out of his terrarium and rest him over my neck and make my way to the couch. I reach for my phone and check my text messages, I have a few from the ‘brat pack’, Flynn has sent me a few memes and there is one from Aly-B telling me she will kill Loman, one from Nikko about playing online tonight, but none from Derek. My heart sinks a little.

  The truth is I actually like my own company most of the time. I’m a loner in many ways, albeit my friends are more like family and after the despots I inherited I am more than pleased with my recruited family. I might get my kicks from hitting the social scene and getting a few laughs with my crazy, loud antics, but I usually treasure my alone time too. The balance is absolutely crucial to me, the yin to the yang. Usually. One day down, four more long days to endure and counting...

  ~ Chapter 10 ~

  The night has eyes

  Friday morning, I get into work feeling a little more upbeat knowing that the gang are all getting together tonight for Izy’s Birthday, the oldest one of the group. I would say the mother hen of the group, but that so doesn’t fit her personality! Izabella Ashby is an enigma. A high-energy party girl with a love of fashion, shopping, self enhancement and a collector of accessories, not limited to the men in her life. The quirkiest of the bunch, she so often has ‘der’ moments that Merrick has affectionately nicknamed her ‘Dizzy Izy’. At my height she has a very different build, very lean and petite, graceful like a gazelle. Almost as into sports as I am but much more girly. She has warm, light caramel brown hair that tussles just below her collar bone. She has had a little work done, breast implants, Botox and most recently her nose. She is a massage therapist but an osteopath in training part time.

  She is a very sexual person, very open to exploration which has led to some very funny incidents in the past, the stand out being the phone call I got at one o’clock in the morning with a frantic Izy in hysterics over some very inventive uses with food during sex-gone-wrong. Apparently if you use a frozen banana, the integrity of the banana’s structure is compromised upon thawing leaving it subject to breaking apart much to Izy’s horror she discovered this when fragments of disintegrated banana were left behind inside her ‘v-jay-jay’. I accompanied her to the emergency rooms to offer moral support, which was hard to do being it was super hilarious, especially trying to explain the post coital situation to her rather hot male attending doctor. Made funnier by the fact she ran into the same hot doctor in the fruit and veg section of her local supermarket. He apparently asked her out after teasing her by recommending she stays away from the bananas. She is such a barrel of laughs and no matter your level of creativity you just can’t make up her best stories if you try!

  She turn’s thirty today, and it’s an important Birthday. The fact that she has just split from her boyfriend of eight months, was a bit of a blow, as Samuel was the longest relationship she’s had in a long while coupled with the disappointing fact that she seemed really into him. I guess her and I have it in common that we are dysfunctional in relationships, although hers has been more due to choice, mine a lack of ability to get started.

  “Morning, Anus Juice.” I say as I round Aly-B’s desk placing a white paper bag down in front of her.

  “Sup, Greasy Waffle.”

  “No Bird-Shit-Lips today?” I enquire hoping the answer is yes as I stare at his vacant desk.

  “HA! I wish! He’ll be back in an hour, had a dentist appointment apparently one tooth was killing him. Sook! Hope he gets septicaemia from it and dies!” I can’t help but laugh in amusement although she’s clearly in a terrible mood so I’m glad I stopped into the bakery and bought us a couple of treats.

  “Maybe if he just brushed them every once in a while? Problem solved.” I scoff.

  “Yeah, that too! What did you get me?” She picks up the bag looking interested as she unravels the top.

  “Sex-on-a-stick.”

  “Oh my god! I fucking love you, I need junk food so bad! You’re the best!” Sex on a stick is what we renamed the delightful little log shaped truffles from the bakery around the corner, silky, melt-in-the-mouth chocolaty bites of heaven rolled in coconut. I’m all about eating real food for optimal health, but sometimes a girl just needs her some sex-on-a-stick!

  “So, what’s going on with you and Bird-shit-lips? All week, it’s been so crazy!” He’s never in our good books, but the levels of hostility have certainly been on the rise lately.

  “That prick will be lucky to make it to tomorrow the way he’s going. First of all, Eldon, has a deadline for this new Dolan Bros development contract. First stage release of finance is due like Tuesday. Well, Dick Wrinkle, has been having a melt down over it! Oh, but it gets better, then he comes over yesterday and tells me I need to scan stuff for him and copy and a bunch of other stuff.”

  “Whose bitch does he think you are?” I sneer in sympathetic disapproval.

  “I know right? So, I say, I’m up to my eyeballs in stuff already, can’t help you. THEN he starts threatening me, says he will recommend I be sacked due to insubordination because this client is really important, gets all up in my grill, and you know I like my personal space! So disgusting! That gingivitis breath of his too, yuckies! He just stood there being a prick about it for twenty minutes, he’s lucky he didn’t get my lunch fork in his eyeball!”

  “We hate him.”

  “We so hate him.”

  “So, let me get this straight? He was into you about a paperwork deadline, but he had plenty of time to stand there and threaten you?”

  “See, that was my argument too. I said to him, you’ve been standing there for twenty minutes and in that time, you could've had the paperwork done. But he just continued on, like hello?”

  “Well the wheels turning, but the hamster is dead, you know this.”

  “Yeah! How does that moron get through a day, honestly? Oh, and the funniest thing was Eldon chewed his ass yesterday, made my afternoon!”

  “He did? Ha! Do tell?” I’m at my desk but riveted at this point!

  “Well, he made a bunch of shit calculations on another contract and Eldon didn’t proof-read it cos he trusts that little wank-stain! Well, the developers picked it up and chipped him about it, made him look like an idiot, so Loman got his rim ripped so hard I could hear it out here. Then he took off early, looked like he was gonna cry too. Sooky-la-las.”

  “Holy shit balls dude!”

  “Yeah, it was great.”

  “I can’t believe he gave me attitude last week, at least my work is good.” I shake my head almost in disbelief, but I’ve been saying it, the dude is borderline incompetent!

  “Yeah, and it’s not my fault he fucked the figures up, so jump out of my ass bitch.”

  “Yeah, but that’s the difference isn’t it? You and I can clear the air with people, including our boss and move forward, him, not so much. He’s clearly taking it out on you.”

  “Clearly he’ll end up in another face brace if he doesn’t get off my tits!” I laugh a bit at that. I need to cheer her up.

  “True dat! How ‘bout some music?”

  “I think we need some.” She smiles at me as she starts enjoying her sex-on-a-stick. So, I take out my phone and flick through my music
, settling on “Theory of a Deadman’s- Truth is”, funniest song ever. I crank it up and we sing along to it for a bit and you can feel the mood lift from the room like the sunshine lifting a heavy fog on a gloomy day.

  As time rolls by, it’s clear that Loman isn’t coming back to the office anytime soon and we continue on with our music and work. Every time I get up to collect documents from the printer, I bust out a few over the top theatrical dance moves to draw out a laugh from Aly-B. We have moved from “Theory of a Deadman” to “Avenged Sevenfold”, “Puddle of Mudd” and “Five Finger Death Punch” and onto playing the classics like “Led Zeppelin”, “Dio” and “Queen” and “Queen” is just too hard not to sing and dance too. At one-point Brian rang, and she sang a few bars down the phone, I’m pretty sure he thought we’d finally lost the plot or had started drinking early, but it’s Friday after all, and it’s hard to keep good party goers down.

  The afternoon winds down and I leave work and head home to scrub up for the celebrations tonight. I pop on some faded skinny leg jeans that make my ass look killer, showing off all my curves. I choose a golden-creamy coloured low cut dressy sleeveless top that has what almost looks like upside down black embroidered peacock feathers staggered at the bottom, so the hem is uneven, each detail enhanced with gold threading which is also filigreed around my breasts. Good old fashion bling for the girls. I choose some low hanging drop earrings some chunky gold and black bangles and some sexy high heels that are a peep-toe stiletto sandal hybrid, all curvy straps tangling over the top of my feet each strap jewel lined in crystal diamantes. I’ve left my long dark hair out and flowing tonight and finished my face off in a smouldering Smokey eye with a neutral lip. I am ready to tear it up tonight!

  I grab the bag with Izy’s present inside it and head down to the red wrinkle. I didn’t want to catch the bus alone into the city all dolled up, so I drive to Merrick and Flynn’s place so we can travel together.

  Flynn whistles through his teeth appraising me as he answers the door.

  “Daaaaamn girl! You are looking hot! Breaking hearts tonight for sure.”

  “Why thank you.” I counter giving a slight twirl showing off my attire before stepping inside.

  “You as well.” I add waving my hand over him. He’s wearing very dark jeans with a blood red shirt over a black tee, very cool and add in his gelled hair with a stylish flip at the front, oh yes, he’s definite arm candy! Merrick comes striding down the hallway with a present under his arm wearing some really cool distressed jeans and a white embroidered dress shirt which is undone at the top just enough that you can see the top of his ripped chest. Oh, he is on the prowl tonight!

  “Jesus, T, you look fucking amazing!” He stops in front of me, checking me out before giving me a cheek to cheek peck. He smells great too, something almost like cocoa and almonds, a definite double whiff!

  “As do you Merk. Getting some lucky lady’s engine revving, huh?”

  “You know it.” He chuckles softly as he pulls the door closed behind us.

  We ride the bus in, and Flynn tells us about the gigs he has coming up in the next few months. We continue to chatter amongst ourselves, Merrick dropping me in it with, Ezra, Monday night and I cop a ribbing from them until we reach the corner closest to ‘The Vibe’ before exiting the bus. I don’t mind, it’s all in good humour. I walk arm in arm with both Merrick and Flynn, partly because they are just the best friends a girl could ask for, but mostly because my heels are huge and the pavement is uneven and I don’t need to trip over making a dick of myself while trying to look sophisticated. We get a few odd looks as we enter the club making our way through the small crowd to the area down the back which we have all but claimed. Most weekends there is a live band playing, sometimes Flynn’s band plays, it has to be said, they do offer a unique vibe, and it is the best place to come and chill out at. Swankier than most clubs, heaps less immature types, it’s definitely a bit more upscale than most places near us.

  We see Aly-B, Brian, Nikko and Izy sitting together at our usual booth which is very casually decked out with contemporary looking black leather arm chairs surrounding a low, round, tinted plastic coffee table while some large decretive glass beads on a cord hanging ceiling to floor giving the effect of a slight privacy screen. When Izy spots us she jumps up and runs over letting out little squeals of delight.

  “Hi you crazy Mofo’s.” She exclaims before bounding up to us, throwing her arms around me before giving me an exaggerate air kiss.

  “Happy Birthday, Gorgeous, this is for you, might want to open it in private though.” I give her a naughty full teeth cheesy grin as I pass her my gift bag.

  “I’m sure it will be fine. Hi guys.” She lets me go and hugs both Merrick and Flynn in turn giving the same big air kisses in all round typical Izy flair. God, she soooo shouldn’t open it in front of the guys!

  “Happy Birthday, Dizzy, you are looking even more radiant than your usual cute self.” And it’s true, for someone who sounded so wounded about the breakup through the week, she sure does look amazingly put together tonight. She has on a skin-tight, thigh high emerald green dress that flares out from the waist down showing off her lean legs that seem to go on forever thanks to her nude tone stilettos. She has on diamond encrusted tear drop shaped pearl pendant hanging close to her amply enhanced assets with matching earrings set off by a chic side ponytail with her soft flowing loose curls framing her face perfectly, fringe pulled across her face to the same side. She is wearing a gold shimmery eye shadow and the whole look just suits her so well! She could be a celebrity stylist! I’ll be shocked if guys aren’t just dripping off her later on in the night when this place is jam packed.

  “Look what Alyssa Brielle and Brian bought me.” She exclaims bouncing up and down. “Isn’t it to die for?” She points down at a gold cuff bracelet and beams at me. I grab her arm and lift it admiring it.

  “It’s just gorgeous Iz-”

  “Ok, Ok, let’s sit down, I want to open the rest of my presents.” And she is whisking me off towards the chairs by the arm. I am glad to be sitting though. She removes the pink tissue paper from Merrick and Flynn’s bag and digs down into it. She lifts out a bottle of pink Champagne followed by a box of chocolates and some beautiful candles and a bottle of rather fancy looking bubble bath.

  “A thanks so much guys, that’s perfect!” She jumps up to hug them both again before returning to her seat.

  “Just thought it would be a nice pick-me-up for you. Some girl time, soak in a bath sucking back some champers and all that.” Merrick adds in his warm earthy voice.

  “I’m going to enjoy it, most definitely.” She picks up my bag and rests it on her lap. I squint through one eye looking like this might be painful as she takes the first item out of the bag.

  “Holy shit!” She stares stunned for a second before cracking into a full laugh. It’s a plastic cupcake with pink icing and a cherry on top. The guys stare puzzled exchanging glances at each other looking for a clue. She flips it over and hits the switch and it starts to buzz.

  “Ermehgerd! You put batteries in it too?” She lets out a shrill of giggles.

  “Yep, ready to go.” I join her laughter.

  “Ok, is that what I think it is?” Merrick chimes in.

  “It’s a stim-u-lat-or.” Aly-B says giving the air quote marks and doing a doctor evil voice impersonation.

  “Oh, Ok, it is what I think it is.” Merrick sits back in his chair shaking his head. “You girls, seriously.”

  “Am I missing something? Shouldn’t it be cock shaped?” Flynn enquires.

  “The cupcake is a novelty toy, I love it!” She reaches into the bag and brings out the next item.

  “Where the fuck do you find shit like that anyway, Trinity?” Nikko chimes in.

  “I ordered them online.”

  “God, I’m gonna destroy myself later.” Izy adds laughing as she shows off her next item, some excite stimulating lubrication gel. By now the guys are laughing as they h
ave figured out the theme of my gift bag.

  “Next we have...Vibe therapy kegel balls.” She scrunches her nose as she reads the packaging.

  “Ooooooh that will be fun.” She adds and I grin at her and say, “I know right?”

  “Give it here.” Merrick pipes up and extends his hand to take it. Izy hands it over and goes searching around the bag for the last item.

  “Ok, it reads: ‘Our silicone kegel balls from vibe therapy are a combined pleasure and exercise system for the pelvic floor, being specifically designed to provide us gals with a hint of spice to those otherwise tiresome pelvic floor exercises, especially as they can be worn secretly, even for hours’. Well...I’ll be fucked.” He says bemused as he hands it back to Izy. “Does beat a frozen banana though.” He says laughing.

  “I dunno, the banana was pretty fun, up until the retrieval effort that is.” Izy adds of the cuff.

  “You kinky minx, Trinity.” Nikko gets up to grab the toy packaging to have a look.

  “That’s brillllllllliant!” She exclaims holding the DVD up. “Pirates. Thank you, Trinity, you dirty minded freak, come give me some sugar. We are practically twins-ies!” Pirates as in the porn DVD because she’s a collector. She gets up and gives me another hug.

  “You’re so welcome, should keep you busy, huh?” I wink as she recoils back away from me.

  “You know it.” She winks back at me before going back to her seat.

  “What I wanna know is, how the hell you even know that stuff is out there? I know Izy is kinky as fuck, but, Trinity?” Nikko’s interest seems peaked.

  “Google! You can find just about anything on there.” I offer as an explanation dismissing it as no big deal.

  “Aaaah, our mysterious, Trinity, full of sooooo many secrets.” Merrick looks over at me smiling like the Cheshire cat. You ass!