I was living for her.
Her fingers curled in the neck of my T-shirt. Clinging to me, she lifted her head enough to peer up at me. “Here,” she whispered on a throaty sigh.
Groaning, I palmed her bottom, squeezed a little more. “Here,” rumbled from my chest as I took over her mouth. The kiss came hard. Demanding. Aly fucking moaned and opened to me, her tongue all inviting as I swept mine across hers. My hands got lost in the mass of her hair, before they stroked down her spine and came to rest on her glorious ass, which had gotten me started in the first place.
A key rattled in the lock and the front door flew open.
I froze.
Heavy footsteps thudded on the floor as Christopher barreled in. I couldn’t see him. My vision was obstructed by everything that was Aly, hair and hands and every inch of her perfect body. Still, I could feel him stumble to a standstill at the end of the couch where Aly was sprawled across my body.
“Ah… fuck. Are you kidding me?”
Sure as hell could hear him, too.
I tried to nudge Aly off of me, but she just laughed and held me closer, refusing to allow me to push her away.
Instead she lifted herself enough to look at him over her shoulder, her hair falling all around me as she tossed her brother an amused smirk. “Now you know what it feels like,” she said. “At least you didn’t have to find my ass on the couch buck naked with some random hookup.”
I shifted and pushed Aly’s hair back so I could see around her. Christopher cracked a smile and ran an easy hand through his unruly hair. He lifted a nonchalant shoulder, but I could tell he was doing his best to keep his laughter at bay. “Hey now, that’s hardly fair, Aly. You know that only happened once, and I was nice enough to introduce you to her.”
Shaking her head, Aly scoffed, her tone sarcastic but filled with all the tenderness she held for her brother. “And you can’t even begin to imagine how much I appreciated being put through that awkward moment. Believe me, I’m scarred for life.”
I tried to suppress my laughter, but there was no containing it because this girl was just so damned cute, so sweet and funny.
Smart, too.
I knew what she was doing, making the statement to her brother that we were now an us, and he was going to have to get used to seeing the two of us together because there was no tearing us apart. And he had nothing to say about it.
Like my laughter triggered it, Christopher busted up. Apparently he couldn’t hold it in, either, and Aly was fucking grinning between us like she’d won some sort of prize.
I guess maybe she had, getting us all to laugh like that together again. It had been a long time.
Christopher shook it off. As if tossing me a casual hello, he lifted his chin toward me. “So I need you two tonight, the Vine… seven o’clock.” He glanced behind him into the kitchen at the clock glowing from the microwave. “You have twenty minutes to get ready.”
Going to the Vine sounded like about the last thing I wanted to do. I hugged Aly to me. “Not up for that kind of shit yet, man. Aly and I have…” My eyes drifted over the lines of her face, that perfect body still plastered to mine. Lust curled in my stomach. I was pretty sure I wasn’t letting her out this door until I’d explored her body for about the next fifteen hours. “… catching up to do.” That was about all I could say, because I sure as hell wasn’t going to give her brother details on what I did have planned for tonight.
“You’re supposed to be my best friend, remember?” Christopher drew out, all cynicism and snark. Funny, he did sound a whole lot like the friend I used to have. “And you don’t have to stay long,” he continued, nonchalantly tossing his wallet to the bar. “But it’s Cash’s birthday, and the asshole went and got himself a girlfriend, and I refuse to be third wheel in that fiasco. He wants us to have dinner and a couple of beers to celebrate, then the two of them are heading out. Pretty sure I’m gonna need backup.”
Chuckling, I lifted my head to meet his eyes. “What, so you want to play fifth wheel with us instead of third?”
He pointed at me. “Fuck you, dude.”
I laughed.
Aly quickly twisted to her side, her thigh burning into mine as she sat up and looked at her brother. “Wait… what? Cash has a girlfriend?”
“Ridiculous, right?”
“Poor girl. That’d be about as tragic as you coming through the door and announcing you had a girlfriend.” Aly shook her head with the tease. “I’d have to talk some sense into her.”
Christopher rolled his eyes. “Ha, like that’s gonna happen. Not a chance you need worry about that.” He smirked. “I refuse to look at some chick the way this ass looks at you. Don’t need all the shit that comes with it.” He shot me a mocking glare before he slanted a soft one on Aly.
Disbelieving laughter built in my gut, but I held it back. Fucker was a good guy underneath all the asshole. “Whatever,” I said, my smirk just as big as his.
Aly tsked. “I take it back. Maybe a girlfriend to keep you in line is exactly what you need, Christopher.” Playfulness saturated her tone, though there was no mistaking the point she was really making.
Christopher caught it, too. “Instead of riding my ass, why don’t you get off yours and get ready? ’Cause I’m not leaving here without the two of you. I haven’t met his girl yet, Aly, and I need you to run interference.”
One side of Aly’s mouth lifted in question as she turned to me. “I’m actually kind of hungry and don’t feel like making dinner. You up for it?”
“Whatever you want, baby. You know I’m game.” Wasn’t really. I just wanted to stay here, curled up on the couch with her. But if my girl was hungry, then I figured we’d better get her fed.
Aly hopped off me, dipped down to peck me on the lips just as fast. Her expression was tender when she pulled back. “All right, then. Let me get ready, and then we can get out of here. Sound good?”
I touched her face. “Yeah, sounds good.”
Aly disappeared into her room and reemerged thirty seconds later with a wad of clothes balled against her chest, grinning the cutest grin as she passed back by and into the bathroom so she could finish getting ready.
Sitting up on the edge of the couch, I raked a flustered hand over the top of my head while I stared at the space she’d just inhabited. How could one girl affect me the way she did? Control me? One glance from her was an outright provocation, her barest touch a switch.
Motherfucking trigger.
“You okay, man?” Christopher’s voice was low, without even a hint of the contempt he’d directed at me this morning.
Tipping my head, I looked up at my oldest friend. I shrugged, not because it didn’t matter, but because I really didn’t know. “Don’t know what I am, Christopher. All of this is fucking overwhelming. That’s about all I know.” I lifted a single brow. “That and the fact I love your sister.”
He smiled, all cool and casual, the way he always did, as if that was the only answer I needed. “Good thing. That’s what she needs. Aly has all the rest of that shit together.”
Awe filtered out from me in a weighted sigh as my gaze burned into the wall that separated us, to the place where Aly was changing, the goodness in her presence enough to fill up the entire apartment. “Guess she probably does, doesn’t she?”
Urgency clouded his relaxed demeanor. “You know, the whole time you were gone, she just kept telling me she didn’t want to do it alone.” His throat bobbed as he swallowed, and he shifted his attention to the ground before he lifted it back to me like he was weighing his admission. “I don’t want her to have to do it alone, either.”
For a flash I turned away and scrubbed my palm over my face, nodded hard. Because I fucking got it, what he was saying. “Wasn’t lying to you earlier, Christopher. I won’t leave her.”
He just pursed his lips in acceptance, then shoved the intense moment off as fast as it’d come. “Gonna get changed.”
He headed down the hall. I climbed to my feet, w
ent into Aly’s room, and dug around in my bag. Seemed strange, all my shit in here. I pulled on a fresh tee and pushed my hair back with both my hands before I went back out in the main room and plopped down onto the couch to wait.
The bathroom door knob rattled, and I shifted forward at the same second Aly came walking out.
My breath caught. Literally got stuck right in the middle of my fucking throat.
Goddamn.
The girl was gorgeous.
She was wearing black skinny jeans. And heels. Heels I hadn’t seen her wear before that made her about five inches taller. The girl was already all leg, sexy as all hell. Pair her body with those jeans and those shoes and she was a goddamned wet dream.
Just because it was Aly, she had to match it with this soft gray sweater, something that made her appear all innocent and shy, the thick woven threads dark and plush. The hem brushed just over the top of her low-cut jeans. She swayed a little, letting her ankle fall to one side as she chewed at her lip, like she was impatient to see my reaction. Or maybe she was nervous. Either way, it was really fucking cute and a little bit infuriating because this girl had not one single clue the effect she had on me. She fidgeted as I rose to my feet, shifting enough that I caught a flash of the creamy skin of her still-flat belly.
I shook and my fingers twitched, ’cause damn, I just wanted to touch.
The sleeves of her sweater were fitted and long, extending down over her hands. She fisted the material in her palms, squeezed her shoulders together, watching me approach.
I edged her up against the hallway wall and took her by the hips. “Baby… you are… you look amazing.”
A self-conscious giggle left her, and she looked up at me with a blush kissing her cheeks. Chewing at the inside of her lower lip, she set the welcome of her green eyes on mine. “I figured since it was our first date and all, I’d dress up for you.” Then she winked.
She fucking winked.
Amusement curled one side of my mouth, and I dipped in and took over that nibbling on her bottom lip. “Our first date, huh?” I mumbled at her mouth. “Not sure what you’d call all those times I had you on the back of my bike. How about all those times in your room?”
“I’d call that us… getting to know each other,” she drew out.
I nudged her chin up with my nose and buried my face in the warmth of the delicate flesh of her neck. “I’d say I got to know you pretty well,” I murmured at her skin.
I felt her raspy laughter roll up her throat. “Yes, I’d say you definitely did.”
Pulling back, she gazed up at me, brushing her fingertips down my cheek. The girl just looked happy. And maybe it was wrong, but I couldn’t describe how good it felt to be the one to paint that expression on her face.
Christopher yanked his bedroom door open and rushed down the hall. I turned in his direction, and I could feel the joy that witnessing Aly’s had pushed to my face, all uncontained and uncontrolled.
Because I was fucking happy, too.
Christopher smiled a little like it didn’t piss him off so much, him seeing me there with his sister. As he sauntered toward us, his eyes drifted down Aly. As he passed, he clapped me on the shoulder. “Looks like you’re trying to get our Jared here in another fight, Aly.”
I chuckled low. Dude knew me well. Something I was going to have to get under control, too, losing myself to the chaos that simmered below the surface, ready to overpower my heart and mind. I’d lose her if I didn’t, and I’d rather die than let that happen.
Confusion twisted Aly’s mouth into a frown. Her attention darted between Christopher and me.
Figured I’d clarify, though I was pretty sure she had to know exactly what he was implying. Without breaking our connection, I inclined my head toward him. “I think that’s your dickhead brother’s way of telling you that you look really nice.”
Irritation flashed across that gorgeous face. Offense puckered those full lips, and she flung her arms out to the side. “Oh come on, Christopher. I’m completely covered. What do you want me to wear, a sack?” she challenged.
That sounded like a brilliant idea to me, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to voice it. The way this girl looked was dangerous, hazardous to my sanity, fucking perilous to any asshole who even thought about moving in on her.
Not gonna happen.
Quiet laughter seeped from him as he stuffed his wallet into his back pocket because he knew it, too. His tone softened. “You look beautiful, Aly. But you always do.”
Hers was just as soft. “Thank you.”
I wound Aly’s hand in mine. “You ready, baby?”
She turned that softness on me. “Yeah, let’s go.”
FOUR
Jared
Night had taken hold as the shortened fall days threatened to give way to a desert winter. A crush of cars jammed the streets, a string of restless headlights and frustrated taillights as rush hour crammed the city the evening before the holiday. It seemed everyone in the city had someplace to go.
It took us less than five minutes to make it to our own destination. Aly made a left into the gravel parking lot of the Vine. Loose rocks crunched beneath her tires, and she carefully made her way through the overflowing lot to find an open spot. She pulled in between two beat-up pickup trucks, cut the engine, and we all climbed out.
A cool breeze blew through, kicking up loose debris and scattering it along the ground. Dense city lights glowed a foggy haze against the inky dome above. Only the brightest of stars broke through the urban night. In the windows of the square, brick building that held the Vine, neon lights burned with the promise of beer and a moment’s reprieve, and a low thrum of classic rock seeped through the walls of the tiny bar.
Aly rounded the front of her car. I snaked my arm around her waist and tugged her to my side, because I just needed her close. It was weird, too, unsettling almost, being able to step out with her like this. To proclaim she was mine and not some dirty secret that could only happen behind closed doors.
I pulled the door open and stepped aside to hold it for the two of them. Christopher entered first, and I placed my hand on the small of Aly’s back as I followed them in.
A shot of panic hit me, escalating my pulse. I froze at the threshold as a deluge of memories crashed over me.
And not the pleasant kind.
Three months ago, the day Aly’s mom had shown up at the apartment, I’d come here to escape the dread that had taken me over. That night, I’d been propped up at the bar, alone, doing my best to drink away my anxiety, to hide from it. Really just to fucking drown in it. Because the end result was already clear. I’d known destruction was coming. I’d felt the rending, the tearing away that would usher in the ruin.
I swallowed hard as I glanced at the bar to the right.
Sitting there that night, I’d felt it – the fantasy Aly and I had been living getting ready to come to an end. The end had come just hours later.
Roughing a shaky hand over my head, I tried to quell the sudden suffocating impulse that screamed at me to bolt. To run.
I’d been running so long, it was the only thing I knew how to do.
My chest jerked as I sucked in a breath.
God, I was a fucking disaster. A nightmare. I couldn’t even walk into a building without feeling like I might lose my goddamned mind. It was just a building. A place that meant nothing. The only thing harbored here were memories.
But it was memories that chased me. Memories I could never escape. Memories of what I’d done. Every single one of them seemed to lead my mind back to the greatest mistake I’d ever made.
As if Aly sensed my unease, she stilled and slowly turned around to face me. Concern drew her brows together. In the second she turned and caught my expression, it was like she immediately saw inside me, understood the war I’d fought three months ago. Like she knew how fucking badly I’d wanted to stay, all the while knowing the only choice I had was to leave.
Like she knew I’d had to run because I s
till hadn’t come to the place where I fully grasped what she meant to me. The significance of what we were.
Green eyes caressed my face and settled on my gaze.
She also understood why I hadn’t run far.
And in the end, I just came running back to her.
Tender fingers brushed down my cheek. “If you don’t want to be here, just say so, and we’ll go home,” she offered.
Home.
Even when I’d destroyed mine so long ago, Aly was willing to build a new one with me.
I pushed the heaviness from my lungs and reached out to twist a single lock of silken hair around my index finger. Anchored myself to her. An unseen connection traveled through it, a bond that tethered us together. My spirit stirred as I looked down at the complete selflessness staring up at me.
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