Holier Than Thou (The Tome of Bill)

by Rick Gualtieri

  Behind Remington, the barest of smiles appeared on Tom’s face before once more being buried in whatever alien thoughts were clouding his mind. He was still in there somewhere. I just hoped the others had seen it too. I really preferred he not get utterly annihilated during whatever was about to transpire. I had no idea how things would play out aside from one little detail: it would most likely be violent.

  “The witch is meaningless to me,” Remington said, eliciting worried glances from the ones beside him, “although not to my allies. Still, the Icon is our main quarry. The deal is both for one. If the Icon steps forward quietly and unarmed, I might even be willing to let details of your treachery slip from my report.”

  “You’re too kind.”

  “No, I’m really not. For the life of me I couldn’t understand why you would choose to side with this creature,” he said, dismissing Sheila as little more than some animal. To say it pissed me off would be an understatement. “But then I was enlightened.”

  “Huh? What do you mean?” I asked, somewhat confused. The only one from his group who had known Sheila and what she meant to me was Decker, and he was currently pushing up daisies in upstate New York.

  “All in good time. First things first, Freewill. Speaking of treachery, I’m curious. Where is that other one, the little vampire who came to your rescue up north?”

  “She didn’t come to my rescue.” I muttered. “Well, not much anyway.”

  “The details matter not. What does is that she is a traitor to the vampire race, even more so than you. I shall see her punished for more reasons than one.” His hand moved to his midsection, where Gan had none-so-gently eviscerated him. It was obviously healed by now - Remington wasn’t exactly a child by our standards - but most vamps didn’t exactly approach such matters with an attitude leaning toward forgiveness.

  “She’s dead,” I said flatly, a small part of me enjoying the wishful thinking that accompanied the statement. “After you left, the surviving Templars rallied against her. They killed one another.”

  Remington raised an eyebrow Spock-style. “Well now, that is truly fascinating. I’m utterly surprised to hear it, especially considering the news to the contrary I recently received.”

  “News to the...”

  Remington turned and spoke over his shoulder. “Would you care to come in, Dread Stalker? Bring your new minion with you.”

  Dread Stalker?! Fuck! It figured. Leave it to a holdover from Jeff’s days to dick me up the ass.

  * * *

  Dread Stalker would have been bad enough. A few words from that asshole and all our lies from the very start would come tumbling down like a house of cards. Don’t get me wrong - a small part of me couldn’t blame him. We had kept him in the dark, and he would have obviously thought we should be out hunting the Icon like good little vampire drones. Then again, if he had just followed fucking orders like he was supposed to, this wouldn’t be an issue. The asshole was supposed to be out of town.

  “You’ve betrayed us, Freewill,” Douche Stalker said, entering the room. “I believed in you. You killed Night Razor and now this.” I didn’t really hear him, though. He could have been professing his love for me and asking for my hand in marriage for all I knew. My focus was entirely on who was by his side.

  Benny entered alongside him, a brand new set of fangs protruding from his mouth and the glazed look in his eyes indicative of a vamp under compulsion. Motherfucker! The assholes had even stolen our trick.

  Sheila gasped, “Ben? What did you do to him?”

  Remington chuckled in response. “Do? We’ve given him a great gift, my dear. I can assure you, he’s quite happy with his new station in life. Why, his first act upon awakening was to enthusiastically tell us everything he knew about you, Ms. Sheila O’Connell, daughter of Marsha from Syracuse.”

  Oh shit!

  “You son of a...”

  “Tsk tsk, I wasn’t finished. You needn’t worry. Your family is of no consequence to us...for the moment. As for Benjamin here, fret not. He has been well treated. We even rewarded him for his newfound loyalty.”

  “Rewarded?”

  “Yes, with the flesh of the living.”

  Remington nodded and a few of the vamps behind him stepped aside, revealing Ed. Now it was my turn to let out a gasp. My friend was on his knees, his eyes rolled back in his head. That wasn’t what caused my breath to catch, however. On the side of his neck, still dripping blood, was a fresh wound...a vampire bite - one that I had little doubt was made far less carefully than the nip Sally had given him just days earlier.

  As cool as I tried to play it, I couldn’t keep a look of shock from immediately appearing on my face.

  “So sorry, Freewill,” Remington cooed, “but you know how famished the freshly risen can be. Why, there was simply no stopping him.”

  I had no idea what to do or say, so was surprised as anyone by the words that popped out of my mouth. “Nobody kills this asshole except for me.”

  Remington, for his part, appeared slightly less than terrified. “If you had only taken that attitude when and where you were supposed to, this wouldn’t have been necessary. You have no one save yourself to blame. Now, I repeat what I asked earlier. Where is that little urchin? Don’t bother lying. Benjamin here was quite happy to spill his guts when he was finished spilling your friend’s. We know she still lives. So where is she? Hiding in the stairwell? Perhaps hoping the back entrance isn’t guarded? Maybe she’s crawling through the ducts even as we speak, thinking perhaps we were that easy to sneak up on.” He flashed me his long canines in a sneer. “My men are trained killers, you amateurish fool. What possible course of action did you think we wouldn’t consider?”

  “The windows.”

  “What...”

  *CRASH* Wow, couldn’t have planned that better if I'd tried. Gan burst through one of the plate glass windows behind Remington’s men almost exactly on cue, no doubt a result of her superb vampire hearing. It had been her suggestion to do the human fly impersonation. It wasn’t the most subtle thing from the street, even with the storm outside, but it was the perfect cover against being spied from inside of the building.

  In the time it took those thoughts to be processed, three of Remington’s men collapsed into piles of dust, a result of her claws tearing through necks and abdomens like they were tissue paper. Note to self: don’t tick off Gan.

  She wasn’t finished, though. Before anyone else, ourselves included, could react, Gan screamed out something in Chinese. Under other circumstances, it would have been complete gibberish to me, but she sent it out as a mass compulsion. The act of doing so is partially psychic, so my brain filled in any gaps my ears didn’t understand.

  “SURRENDER! ON YOUR KNEES, LIKE THE PIGS YOU ARE!!”

  I only had a moment to consider that her order didn’t make much sense. Did pigs even have knees? I’m immune to the mind control portion of compulsions, but they still ring in my head like a fucking gong. I was momentarily staggered by the force of the compulsion, but I was easily the least affected...at least of the vamp crowd.

  Nearly the entire population of the room dropped their weapons and kneeled as commanded. Unfortunately, that included Sally. Her gun clanked as she dropped it and obeyed. On the bright side, at least it didn’t go off. It would’ve been just my luck to have the back of my knees blown off.

  Sadly, that was one consequence I had forgotten about when we had planned Gan’s entrance. Compulsions can be a focused thing, or sent out as a mass effect - kind of like a principal addressing a school over the PA system. Sadly, at least as far as I’m aware, they can’t be both. You send it out to the entire room and the entire room will be knocked on their asses. No selective channeling there.

  I shook my head to clear it and surveyed the scene before me. Hands suddenly grasped my shoulders. I spun, almost decking the source out of surprise, but thankfully held myself in check. It was Christy using me as support, the compulsion having gotten through even her defenses. />
  Of my group, only I was left unaffected. Wait, scratch that. I looked past Christy and saw that Sheila stood there looking no more confused than if someone had farted in the room and not admitted to it. Was it possible her powers shielded her from vampiric compulsion too? It made sense. Icons would probably be considered much less of a threat if someone could just command them to jump off a cliff. I locked eyes with her and she gave me a quick thumbs-up.

  Most of Remington’s men were down. Dread Stalker and Benny were likewise kneeling. Tom had been knocked off his feet and he sat with a dazed look on his face. Christy’s sisters were less affected, much like Christy herself. They looked shaken, but otherwise would have their wits back amongst them shortly. The only one of their number who seemed to be holding his own, unfortunately, was Remington himself. Oh shit, he must have been older than I thought.

  His lips pulled back in a snarl.

  “IGNORE THE LITTLE TRAMP!!”

  Whoa! It hit me with a force equal to Gan’s. It had a ripple effect amongst the vampires in the room. Their eyes immediately cleared and they began to rise. I put my arm around Christy as the shock jolted her.

  “BACK ON YOUR KNEES!! OBEY ME!!” Gan replied, raising her voice.

  “KILL HER!!” came the counter order.

  Jesus Christ, it was a fucking compulsion battle. I hadn’t seen one of those before. Just for the record, I really hope to never see one again. My head pounded from the sheer power of their exchange. Fuck me! I was going to need an industrial sized bottle of Tylenol after this thing was over.

  They continued with it, each one trying to overpower the other. The vampires in the room looked like jack-in-the-boxes, alternately rising to defend Remington and dropping to their knees before Gan.

  Christy held her head and sobbed from the force of the continued assault. Her coven-sisters had likewise been knocked for a loop. They were all practically falling over each other, trying and failing to mount a defense. That was nothing compared to Tom, though. He was out cold, a thin trickle of blood dribbling from his ears. That was probably for the best. I peered past him toward Ed. Sadly, my other friend was still out of it. I feared the worst. If I remembered my own turning correctly, his heart was probably slowing down even as that thought hit my head.

  We needed to end this status quo. Fortunately for us, we had the Icon on our side.

  “Enough of this!” She stepped forward and flung her sword across the room at Remington, channeling all her rage at the target most deserving of it. For most of us, this would be an utter embarrassment. Swords are unwieldy. Hell, for most people, even a throwing knife would go clattering harmlessly off into a corner somewhere, causing no more harm than to the thrower’s ego.

  Not so for Sheila. The blade flew through the air - end over end on a course straight toward its intended target. Holy shit, she was badass.

  Sadly, Remington saw it too.

  “PROTECT ME!!”

  He smiled as he sent out the compulsion. Unlike the others, I could sense this one was focused.

  The effect was immediate.

  Benny launched himself obediently in front of Remington just as the broadsword finished crossing the distance.

  “No!” Sheila cried, but it was in vain. The sword impaled him neatly through the chest. The shock of dying, for good this time, must have cleared the compulsion from his head. Even as he disintegrated he raised his hand and made the sign of the cross over his own forehead - finishing just as his body exploded into a shower of dust. The poor bastard. He had been an asshole, but he deserved better.

  The sword, with nothing left holding it, landed with a clank at Remington’s feet.

  “You monster!” Sheila screamed and launched herself in his direction.

  Things were getting out of hand, no doubt something Remington was counting on. Thankfully I remembered the plan and still had enough of my wits about me. Being mindful of her powers, I grabbed Sheila’s cloak before she could take more than a few steps, and yanked her backwards - sending her off balance. Even so, my hand got a quick sizzle for my troubles.

  Before things could spiral further out of control, I turned to Christy.

  “Are you still with us?”

  Her eyes refocused and she gave a quick nod.

  “Do it!”

  * * *

  On the way over, through scenic underground New York, I had considered the spell the witches had used to kidnap Ed. It had sounded like the metaphysical equivalent of a stun grenade. I had asked Christy if it were something that could be cast by just one mage, or if it required multiple hands - much like vaporizing the loft had. She had immediately gotten my drift.

  Now, in the middle of the melee, she stepped in front of me, still wobbly but determined. Raising her arms, she uttered a quick chant. A moment later, a concussive wave of pure energy exploded out from her in three directions. Sally, Sheila, and I were the only ones spared the effect.

  Of our enemies, only Remington saw it coming in time to react. He tried to leap back, hoping to avoid the blast, but was a moment too slow. It caught him mid-air, sending him ass over teakettle to crash into the far wall - leaving a nice sized dent in it. Good. I found myself hoping it hurt.

  All the rest, Gan included, were bowled over as if an invisible freight train had plowed into them. There was no helping her, but she knew to expect it. The others, though, hadn’t considered that maybe, just maybe, Christy wasn’t on their side.

  The effort cost her, though, and she stumbled. Fortunately, my vampire reflexes were up to snuff and I caught her before she could hit the ground.

  She blinked a few times and caught her breath. As I helped her to her feet, she said, “That was everything I had. It won’t last long, though.”

  “It’ll have to be enough,” I replied, quickly turning to the rest. “Sally, you take care of Tom...” Sheila stepped forward, but I grabbed her arm. My hand immediately sparked, white flame engulfing it. Fuck me! I pulled back, trying to keep from crying in the process. Fortunately it got her attention. “You get Ed. I think he needs your help most of all.”

  “But...”

  “Revenge is later,” I said. “Rescue comes first.”

  That snapped her out of it. She gritted her teeth, but nodded.

  “Christy, wait by the door,” I continued. “Lord help me, but I’ve gotta grab Gan.”

  * * *

  Sheila kept to her part of the plan, but that still didn’t stop her from throwing a vicious kick at one of Remington’s men as she walked past. She really was a girl after my own heart.

  Sally retrieved her gun - gotta have priorities, I guess - then raced over to Tom. She muttered a quick, “Dumbass,” under her breath, but otherwise did as asked. She lifted him up and tossed him over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. It was good enough. Alive was the priority, gentle was not.

  Gan was already starting to shake off the effect of Christy’s blast. That meant Remington wouldn’t be far behind. No time to waste. I picked up her diminutive form, ignoring her groggy whisper of, “Greetings, beloved,” lest I think better of things and just leave her crazy ass behind.

  Christy was waiting for us. She was still shaky, but appeared to have regained her composure following the frappe treatment her brain had received during the compulsion tug-o-war. Everyone had retrieved their intended targets. Sheila struggled a little with Ed, lacking our vampire-born strength, but fortunately he wasn’t a particularly large guy. Double fortunate was that he hadn’t completed the transformation yet. Otherwise, he would be a lot lighter (but much hotter) in her grasp.

  “Time to vacate the premises.”

  Had we more time and resources, I might have suggested a mad staking party before leaving, but I doubted we’d get too far before a defense was mounted.

  Speaking of staking, Sheila was missing something important. “You forgot your sword.”

  “Oh shit!” she replied, but then glanced toward Ed and shrugged. We were out of time and she knew it.

>   The elevator wasn’t there waiting for us, but I wouldn’t have wanted to try it anyway. With us holding all the cards, it would be a no brainer for our enemies to snap the cables. The ensuing plummet wouldn’t (hopefully) kill me, Sally, or Gan, but it would almost certainly finish off the non-vamps. We made a run for the stairwell instead.

  Immediately upon opening it, voices floated up from below.

  “Do not let them escape!”

  Fuck! We’d have the high ground against whoever was below, but all they needed to do was stall us long enough for the others to wake up and box us in. With Gan out of it and Christy’s batteries still recharging, I didn’t like those odds. Goddamn it. Remington had outmaneuvered us after all.

  “The roof,” Gan slurred from my shoulder. “We can leap to the next building over...carry the humans with us.”

  Well maybe she could. I wasn’t quite so sure my legs were up to the task. There was also Sheila to take into account. None of us were picking her up, at least not without suffering the last sunburn we’d ever experience. Still, it was worth a try. At the very least we might be able to box Remington’s people in at the top of the stairwell. That would give us a fighting chance to figure out a way to escape.

  The good thing was that the office wasn’t exactly situated in the tallest building in Manhattan. Unfortunately, it was tall enough and my coven’s floors weren’t anywhere near the top. But hey, what’s a nice brisk hike when one of your group is pregnant and the rest are lugging dead weight?

  Fortunately, Gan snapped out of her daze only two floors later. The downside was that Remington was probably on the move again as well. She wanted to bring up the rear, and I was tempted to take her up on the offer. However, I knew her temper, having seen it in action. Once she got pissed, she stayed that way. She’d most likely head down to try and take on the entire group single-handedly. Don’t get me wrong, I gave her even odds at pulling it off, but it struck me as a potentially lethal idea to separate our group...especially if she failed.

  Being that she was by far the fastest, I sent her ahead up the stairs instead. If there was anyone above us, she could take them out. If not, it would give her a few extra minutes to scout out the roof situation.