A Nest of Sparrows

by Deborah Raney

  “Ah, good morning! I see you two have met.”

  Dee turned to greet him. “Well, no, actually we haven’t.” She turned again and held out a hand to the brunette. “You must be Darrin’s fiancée.”

  The woman smiled warmly and took Dee’s hand. “Yes, I’m Carma. Carma Weist. And you must be Dee.”

  “Dee Thackery. Nice to meet you. Glad you could get in on a visit. Is this your first time to meet the kids?”

  “Yes, but I would have known them anywhere.” She moved to put a hand on Beau’s shoulder and stooped to his eye level. “You are the spitting image of your daddy. But you probably hear that all the time.”

  Beau looked at the floor, silent.

  Darrin stepped in and knelt between the two little girls. “Lacey, Danica…Beau, I’d like you to meet Carma. She’s my fiancée. She’s going to be your mama in just a few months.”

  “Well, your step-mama, anyway,” Carma said, with a nervous laugh.

  Dee watched the children carefully.

  Beau ducked out from under Carma’s hand and moved toward the bookshelves in the corner. “I’m gonna go put a puzzle together,” he mumbled.

  “Great idea,” Darrin Parnell said, catching his fiancée’s eye and giving a shrug before starting after Beau. He turned back to Carma for a moment. “Honey, why don’t you and the girls come help us.”

  Carma slid her handbag off her shoulder and laid it on the coffee table near where she’d been sitting. She took Dani’s hand. “Come on, Danica, Lacey. Is there a favorite puzzle you like to work?”

  Dani looked up at Dee with wide eyes, as though asking permission to go with the woman.

  Dee smiled and gave an encouraging nod. “I’ll be right over here. You go on ahead and play with the puzzles, Dani.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry.” Carma knelt and faced Dani. “I called you Danica. Would you rather go by Dani?”

  The little girl gave a slight lift of her shoulders and nodded.

  “Well, it’s a pretty name either way. Now, let’s go see what those boys are doing.”

  Dani giggled. “Darrin isn’t a boy.”

  Carma rolled her eyes. “Well, you’d have a hard time proving it by me. He sure acts like one sometimes,” she said, laughing at her own joke. She pulled a child-sized chair up beside Darrin Parnell, patting his knee under the table.

  Dee watched as Lacey and Dani hung back, apparently not quite sure what to make of this new wrinkle in their weekly visit with their father. Beau had plopped in a chair in the corner, head down, concentrating on a piece of the easy jigsaw puzzle. Every few seconds, he glanced up through a curtain of long blond bangs, eyeing Carma warily.

  “Come on, girls, pull up a chair,” Carma said, pulling out the chair on the other side of her. She patted the seat. “Come and sit beside me.”

  The girls sat down and quickly became involved in the puzzle. The five of them worked together in silence for a few minutes. When Lacey snapped a corner piece of the puzzle in place Carma purred, “Ooh, good job, Lacey. I’ve been looking all over for that piece. You’re pretty good at this.”

  “I’m good at puzzles, too,” Dani said.

  “Yes, you are. Just look! We’re almost finished with this puppy.”

  Wrinkling her nose, Dani tilted her head and looked at the puzzle. “It’s not a puppy,” she said. “It’s a merry-go-round.”

  Carma burst out laughing and leaned in to give her a squeeze. “It’s just a figure of speech, sweetie.”

  Carma Weist wasn’t the least intimidated by the children. Dee looked on as the woman asked them questions and made little jokes. Soon the girls and even Beau were laughing right along with her. Carma seemed to bring out a softer side of Darrin too. Dee watched with interest as he followed his fiancée’s lead in interacting with the children.

  It struck Dee that they really did look like a family sitting around the table enjoying their time together. There was no doubt Beau Parnell was his father’s son, with their matching hazel eyes and dark blond hair. And even with their pale yellow hair, the two girls could have been Carma’s daughters as she bent her head between them, joining in their giggling.

  Dee thought about how very quickly October––and the date for the next hearing––was approaching. And watching this broken family together, seemingly mending before her eyes, she knew that, with this woman by his side, Darrin Parnell would easily be granted full custody of his children.

  Dee thought of Wade, and her heart broke for him.

  Chapter 34

  The last weeks of summer took on a dreary familiarity for Wade, punctuated only with brief moments of happiness each Tuesday morning when Dee brought the kids out for their weekly visit. She was bringing them earlier now that school had started. She usually had them at his place around seven. He fixed breakfast for all of them, and then she dropped them off at school on her way back to work.

  He and Pete had finally finished the addition south of town and were beginning another project just a mile from his place. It was nice not to feel like he was wasting so much time on the road.

  This morning he had a case planning conference at St. Joseph’s at ten o’clock, but he’d gone to the site early and put in a good three hours with Pete before he had to come home and clean up for the meeting.

  Now, freshly showered and shaved, he hopped in the pickup. He turned the key in the ignition. Nothing. He tried again. The starter had been acting up lately, but he’d always been able to get the engine to finally turn over. He yanked at his tie and looked at his watch. The meeting would be starting in fifteen minutes. He didn’t have time to mess with the truck now.

  He slammed the driver’s side door harder than necessary and ran into the house for the keys to Starr’s car. He’d only driven her car a few times since he’d lost the kids. He never had changed over the title or insurance, not feeling quite right about even having Starr’s car in his possession, though he’d continued to pay her auto insurance bills every month.

  He backed out of the garage and raced down the drive, quickly reaching sixty on the gravel road.

  The only good thing about these meetings was that they gave him a chance to see Dee Thackery. After their rough start, he and Dee had settled into a comfortable routine. They’d seemingly reached a compromise, with her joining into his games with the children occasionally, and him being more careful to respect the professional distance she needed to keep between them.

  Ironically, he’d learned to know Dee even better since she’d told him she needed to back off. Maybe she’d just needed to make sure he understood the boundaries. Whatever it was, she had begun to open up and share more of herself with him, and he’d felt comfortable doing the same with her.

  After she’d brought the kids out for their visit last week, he finally admitted to himself that, were it not for the constraints of professional integrity keeping them apart, he would definitely ask Dee for a date.

  The realization was unsettling. He felt almost as if he were being disloyal to Starr. Yet it brought with it an awareness that Starr––and her children––had changed him in ways he was only beginning to understand.

  “What have you done to this confirmed bachelor?” he whispered into the emptiness of Starr’s car. He wasn’t sure if he meant the question for Starr or for God. He’d spoken to the former less often as the months went by, and to the latter far more often. That it took tragedy to bring him closer to his Savior shamed him, and yet how grateful he was to have a place to take his sorrow.

  He’d started attending church on Sunday mornings again. Pete and Margie always saved him a place, and though it was still hard to walk through the front doors every week knowing he would be inspected and probably pitied, he’d found comfort and fellowship there, too.

  As he turned on to the blacktop, he looked at the clock and punched the accelerator harder. He did not want to be late for this meeting.

  A mile and a half from town he was making good time when he glanced in his rearview mirror
and saw the dreaded strobing red and blue lights of a Coyote County police car behind him.

  Wade hit the brakes and slammed the ball of his hand on the steering wheel. He did not have time for this. He pulled over and dug in his back pocket for his wallet. As Wade watched in the side mirror, the officer strolled to the side of the car. It was Bill Etchison. He and Wade had graduated from the same class at Coyote High.

  Wade rolled down the window. “Hey, Bill. How’s it going? I guess I was driving a little fast, huh?”

  “I clocked you at seventy-five,” Bill said in the slow drawl that made him the most-impersonated cop in town.

  “I’m sorry. My truck wouldn’t start and I was late for a meeting. Not making excuses, just giving you the facts.”

  “I understand,” Bill said, reaching into his pocket. “Happens to the best of us.”

  As Bill slowly folded back the cover of the citation pad, Wade held his breath, hoping to see the word Warning at the top of the page.

  “Hate to do it, Wade, but I’m gonna have to give you a ticket,” Bill said. “I’m gonna need to see your driver’s license and some proof of insurance.”

  “I understand,” Wade sighed under his breath, and dug his license and the red and white State Farm Insurance card out of his wallet.

  While Bill carefully copied the information onto the ticket, checking every little bit to see if the carbon was going through, Wade tapped an impatient rhythm on the steering wheel and watched the clock mark off the minutes. Great. Now, besides being late for the meeting, he could add a traffic ticket to all the strikes against him.

  “I see you’ve still got the car insured in…her name. You probably ought to get that changed over.”

  Wade rested an arm on the open window. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ve been meaning to do that.”

  Bill tore the ticket off the pad and handed it back to Wade, along with his license and insurance card. “You have a good day now.” He gave a half-mast salute.

  Wade resisted rolling his eyes. “Thanks, Bill.” He waited until the cruiser had disappeared over a hill before he pulled the car back onto the road. It was an effort to stay within the confines of the speed limit as he drove the last mile into Coyote.

  Frank Locke was supposed to be at the case planning meeting. Wade would ask him what he should do about Starr’s auto insurance. There went another hour of work time down the drain.

  Sophia Braden grabbed two meatloaf dinners––the Monday lunch special––off the pass-through and headed for the booth in the corner. “There you go,” she said, sliding the plates onto the table and removing the soup bowls. “Holler if there’s anything else I can get for you.”

  The two elderly gentlemen nodded over mouthfuls of mashed potatoes, and waved her off.

  As Sophie headed back to the kitchen, she noticed Wade Sullivan waiting to be seated. She hadn’t seen Wade since that day she’d gone out to see the kids at his place. She turned and walked over to him. “Hey, Wade. How’s it going?” She hoped the slight quaver in her voice didn’t give away her apprehension.

  “It’s going okay. Do you have a minute?”

  Her stomach turned a somersault. She tossed her bangs out of her eyes and cleared her throat. “Um…sure. Let me get rid of these dishes.” She tipped her head toward an empty section of the restaurant. “Go ahead and have a seat over there. We’re not busy. I’ll sit with you for a minute. You ordering?”

  He gave a nod. “I’ll just have iced tea.” He walked back to the table and sat down with his back to the door.

  Wade hadn’t been in the café in months. Sophie knew he’d been working out of town, but still, he used to bring the kids in for supper once a week or so. Maybe coming in here reminded him too much of the kids––and Starr. After all, this was where they’d met. She closed her eyes and tried to push the thoughts of her sister from her mind. It was still sometimes hard to believe Starr was dead.

  She dumped the dirty bowls in a dishpan, poured an iced tea and went over to sit across from him.

  “Thanks,” he said, when she set the glass in front of him.

  She eyed him carefully. “Is everything okay?” He looked different. Thinner and pale, almost––in spite of his deep year-round tan. “How are the kids?”

  He brightened a bit. “They’re okay. They’re handling the whole thing pretty well, I think.”

  “That’s good. You still get to see them every week?”

  “Uh-huh. It…it’d be nice if you’d come and see them sometimes. Since school started they’re usually there around seven. I know that’s kind of early for you, but… I’ll fix you breakfast.” He ran a finger through the droplets of condensation that had formed on his glass.

  She didn’t respond. Didn’t know what to say.

  “I had a meeting with my attorney this morning,” he told her. “You know the hearing comes up next month? The big one.”

  “Yeah, that’s what I heard.” Oh, had she ever heard it. Hadn’t Darrin Parnell reminded her of the fact every single week for the past three months?

  Wade took a swig of his iced tea, then put the glass down and looked at her. “Frank Locke––my lawyer––says it would be really helpful if you could spend some time with the kids––until the hearing anyway. Parnell’s engaged now and Locke says it would help a lot if we could show that I…that the kids have a…you know––a female role model in their lives.”

  She opened her mouth to protest, but he held up a hand and cut her off.

  “I know it’s the worst possible time for your schedule, Sophe, but…I’m begging you. Locke won’t come right out and say it, but I know he thinks Parnell is going to get the kids.”

  “Really?” Her heartbeat quickened. If that were true, why did Darrin need her so all-fired bad? “He really thinks you’ll…lose?”

  Wade’s voice rose half an octave. “I’ll make it up to you, Sophie. I don’t know how. We’re behind at work and this lawyer is costing me an arm and a leg. But I promise I’ll make it up to you somehow––when this is all over.”

  “You don’t owe me anything, Wade. And––” She hung her head, genuinely ashamed. “It’s not like I don’t want to see the kids. I do. I love them. But––” Her throat filled and she motioned for him to wait.

  Wade reached out and put a hand over her wrist on the table. “Is something wrong? What is it, Sophe?”

  Her mind raced to come up with a response that wasn’t a lie. “I’m not the best role model for Starr’s kids. You don’t know the…junk I’ve done.”

  “I know most of it. And I know it’s in the past. Those kids don’t give two hoots if you had some rough years. They love you anyway. And”––his grip on her wrist tightened––“if Starr were here she’d tell you that’s exactly the way God loves you.”

  She pulled her arm away, rubbing the place where he’d touched her. “No, Wade. I’m not buying it. You think you know what I’ve done…what I’ve been. But you don’t know the half of it.”

  He looked at her, a question in his eyes.

  She turned away, shunning his gaze.

  “I don’t care,” he said finally. “The kids won’t care. It doesn’t matter, Sophie. Love doesn’t keep score. There are no degrees of sin.”

  “Yeah, right.” She’d heard that line before. It never had made sense. He wouldn’t be saying that if he knew the truth about her.

  “Sophie, will you help me? I don’t want to lose them.” Wade’s voice broke.

  Sophie felt a hard place inside her soften ever so slightly. “I…I can’t make any promises. I’m working extra shifts every chance I get. I can’t keep that up if I don’t get some sleep and I can’t pay my bills if I don’t work the hours.” That, at least, was true.

  “I know. I’m sorry. Maybe I could work out something in the evenings. I don’t know how flexible Dee can be. I’ve already changed the time on her once.”

  “I’ll see. I’m not making any promises,” she said again.

  “All I’m asking is tha
t you try. For the kids’ sake.”

  She gave a slight nod, avoiding his eyes. Laughter floated in from the entry and Sophie looked up to see a group of women from the office across the street waiting to be seated. She slid her chair back and stood. “I’ve got to go.” She started toward the front of the restaurant, grateful for an excuse to end their conversation.

  “Thursday morning’s the next visit,” he called after her. “Seven-thirty.”

  She pretended not to hear him.

  Chapter 35

  Wade opened the door to the State Farm Insurance Agency and let out a short breath as the blast of chill air hit him.

  A ponytailed college-age girl looked up from behind a computer on a cluttered desk. “Good afternoon. How may I help you?”

  Wade took his wallet from his pocket and slipped out his proof of insurance card. “I’d like to cancel this account.” He laid the card on the only clear spot on the desk.

  The girl pushed some papers out of the way and picked up the card. “Starr Parnell?”

  Wade nodded.

  “And your name?”

  “Wade Sullivan. I’m…I was her fiancé. She’s…deceased.”

  The girl’s head jerked up. She stared at him. Wade prepared himself for an embarrassing display of sympathy, but after a moment, she pulled her keyboard closer and began keying in information from the card. “And are you still”––She stopped and looked up from the computer––“Oh, sorry. Please have a seat.”

  Wade pulled out the molded plastic chair in front of her desk and sat down.

  “Now, are you still driving the vehicle? We could transfer the policy over to your name if you like.”

  “Um…no. It’s––” He cleared his throat. “It’s kind of complicated. Her estate hasn’t been settled yet, and my lawyer advised me to just cancel the account for now. No one is going to be driving the car.”

  The girl turned back to the computer, clicked a few buttons, and leaned in to read the information that appeared on the screen. Wade was not computer savvy, but he instinctively sat forward on his chair to gaze at the screen. The computer was sitting at an angle, so he had a clear view of the screen, but the glare off the overhead fluorescent light obscured the page.