Fusion (Explosive #5)

by Tessa Teevan

  I moved his hand back to his own thigh. He groaned and leaned his head against the wall.

  “Sierra, you’re killing me here. It’s been over a month and you won’t even let me kiss you. I get it. You’re young, but I thought we’d be a little further than this by now.”

  My nerves rose as he stared down at me. “I don’t… I’m not…” I stammered, sounding like an idiot. What did he expect? I mean, I knew his reputation, but he’d always been sweet and patient with me.

  “What about homecoming, Sierra? There’s an after party, and I was thinking I could get us a hotel room. I can properly introduce you to everything physical. It can be romantic if that’s what you want,” he told me, running his fingers down my arm.

  “A hotel room?” I gulped, my eyes widening as I shook my head. We’d never even kissed. What the hell was he expecting with a hotel room? I slid my chair back and grabbed my purse. “Excuse me. I need to use the restroom.”

  I spent a couple of minutes trying to calm my nerves in the bathroom. When I finally settled my stomach, I splashed water on my face and then walked back towards our table.

  What I saw stopped me in my tracks. Apparently, Danny’s patience had ended. Sitting in his lap was the loosest girl in school, Mallory Buchanan. He was kissing her neck, and his hand was sliding up her skirt. Oh God, what had I been thinking, going out with this guy?

  Part of me knew that it was my fault for trying to date someone I wasn’t all that interested in, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Not to mention everyone in school would know about this by Monday. Danny could’ve at least waited until our date was over before moving on.

  Mallory gave me a wicked grin when she looked up and saw me. Danny shrugged as if it were no big deal.

  “Sorry, Sierra. I just don’t think we’re compatible,” he offered.

  “Right.” It wasn’t a great comeback. “Have fun, assholes.”

  As I turned to leave, Danny called my name. “Just so we’re clear, I don’t think we should go to homecoming together.”

  I wasn’t sad because this thing with Danny was over, but I was embarrassed. Still, I held my head high and nodded.

  “Thank goodness,” I answered, ready to turn on my heel and flee.

  My initial reaction was relief. But a second one hit me square in the chest. I wanted Jeremy. Clearly, a month of barely spending any time together had done little to squelch my desire for him.

  Mallory, however, had one last dig to get in. It was as if she read my mind.

  “Oh, and, Sierra, if you plan on calling your knight in shining armor, I wouldn’t bother. I saw him earlier with a blanket on the beach. You wouldn’t want to interrupt, now would you?” Her taunting made me want to rip her over-bleached blonde hair out of her head. “Especially if he’s with Heather.”

  That, more than anything, was what made me want to break down. The idea the Jeremy was off getting physical with someone when I couldn’t even kiss a boy I’d thought I’d liked. With the flick of my middle finger, I turned and ran, pushing the door to the restaurant open just as the tears began to fall. Not wanting anyone to see me, I rushed in the direction of the beach, blinded by my tears.

  I ran as fast as I could, racing in the sand when, out of nowhere, I tripped over something and went flying, taking a face full of sand. My mouth sputtered as I tried to spit it out.

  “Sierra?”

  My heart stopped. I quickly rose to my feet and groaned when I saw that I’d tripped over Jeremy. Sure enough, he was sprawled out on a blanket, and I covered my eyes before I could see who he was with.

  “Sorry! Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. I’ll be fine. Just…just leave me alone, Jeremy. Enjoy your date.” I nearly choked on the words as I fled, running down the beach as fast as my feet would take me. I didn’t stop until I got to a dune I could hide behind and lick my wounds.

  When I fell to my knees, a year’s worth of tears started to spill out. It was finally happening. Jeremy was dating. This was harder and so much more painful than I’d expected, if the sudden ache in my heart was any indication.

  Moments later, the very object of both my affections and my current consternation showed up. I wiped my eyes, trying to mask my tears.

  “I thought I told you to leave me alone,” I said curtly.

  His eyes softened in the moonlight. “That’s not possible, Sierra. You know that. I’ll never leave you alone.”

  I choked out a disbelieving laugh. “You can’t go running away from your dates whenever I need rescuing, Jeremy. It’s time I become a big girl and take care of myself.”

  He folded his arms across his chest and stared at me. “That’s the second time you’ve mentioned my being on a date. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “The beach. The blanket. Mallory said you were on a date. Sorry for interrupting.”

  I wasn’t actually sorry. And I didn’t feel bad for it.

  “I’m not on a date. I’m here by myself. Solo. Single. Just me. But what about you? Weren’t you supposed to be on a date?”

  My heart was far too happy at his admission. Even so, I let out a wry laugh and shook my head. “You were out enjoying the peace and quiet. You don’t want to hear about my disastrous date. I’ll be fine. You can leave me alone.”

  Instead of doing that, he reached his hand out. I stared at his silhouette in the moonlight. Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to place my hand in his and embrace his warmth. So I did.

  We walked to his blanket, and he didn’t drop my hand. He was silent until we sat down, and then he brought his hand to my cheek, wiping my tears away.

  “Sierra. How many times do I have to say it? Where you go, I go. I’ll never leave you alone. Especially when you’re hurting. Now, tell me why you’re crying and whose ass I have to kick.”

  At that, I laughed and felt better than I had in the last month. God, I’d missed him.

  He listened as I told him about Danny and Mallory. The entire time, he ran soothing circles on my arm, calming every nerve that’d been swirling around my insides. When I got to the part about the hotel room, he tensed, his body so rigid it caught me off guard. He started to move, but I placed my hand on his arm.

  “It’s okay, Jeremy. No need to defend my honor.”

  He frowned, his forehead furrowed in anger, and I quickly continued.

  “It’s not even that I really liked him. I mean, he’s cocky but so hot. And I don’t know. I guess I just wanted someone to like me.” I shrugged. “So much for going to homecoming.”

  I’d never admitted it to anyone but Jenna, but I’d really been looking forward to the dance. I wanted to go with my girlfriends to pick out my perfect dress then spend the day getting ready together and the night dancing, laughing, and having a great time.

  “Go with me,” Jeremy blurted out, sending a wave of shock throughout me.

  I shoulder-checked him and laughed. It felt like the first time I’d done that in weeks. “You don’t mean that,” I said, secretly wishing he did.

  “Yes, I do.”

  I caught his gaze in the moonlight. “You’re serious, aren’t you?” I whispered.

  When he nodded, my brows came together.

  “You hate dancing, Jeremy. Why would you go?”

  He shrugged, but his eyes were telling a story I couldn’t quite read. “Because you want to.”

  “And?” I prompted.

  He gave me that look.

  “Where I go, you go?”

  He nodded. “Precisely. Even if it means I’ll be spending the next two weeks brushing up on my MC Hammer and Vanilla Ice.”

  “Jeremy, you do realize we’re in the back half of nineteen ninety-nine, right?”

  “Sierra, Ice Ice Baby will stand the test of time. Just you watch. Our kids will still be listening to it even when they’re teenagers. You can take that to the bank.”

  My stomach twisted at the idea of our kids. I knew he didn’t mean ours together, but the thought was already impla
nted in my mind. And, even though I wasn’t ready for sex, I could picture a little Jeremy-Sierra baby.

  I smiled and leaned my head against his shoulder. “You’re the best, Jeremy,” I told him. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

  “You’ll never get the chance to find out.” With that, he stood up, pulling me with him. “Now, come on. We have a dance I need to practice for.”

  Just as I’d thought, by Monday, the whole school knew that Danny and I weren’t a thing anymore. And you know what? I didn’t even care. Jeremy was more pissed about the looks and the whispers in the hallways than I was, and he stayed closed to me whenever he could. He was being overprotective, and I didn’t mind one bit.

  “I’m so sick of this,” he grumbled as we walked into the lunchroom together.

  Across the room, Danny was sitting with the other football players, and Mallory, naturally, was practically in his lap. Jeremy scowled and clenched his fists at his sides.

  I placed a hand on his arm. “Calm down, Rambo. I don’t mind. I promise. I’m over it,” I said, waving them off.

  He peered down at me. Then his eyes lit up as an idea struck him. Instant worry swirled in my belly. I was used to Jeremy’s not-so-brilliant plans, and I had no idea what he was about to propose. Before I could ask what the hell he was thinking, he grasped my hand, entwining our fingers. Then he pulled me in close, and my heart started beating fast as his lips hovered just above my ear.

  “We’ll show them you’re really over it,” he whispered.

  I barely had time to catch my breath as he dragged me over to the table where they were selling tickets to the dance. In his loud, booming voice, he asked for two tickets and let everyone in the room know that he was going to have the prettiest date there. My face flushed with embarrassment until I saw Mallory’s mouth gaping. I decided to play along with Jeremy and slid my free hand into the back pocket of his jeans. I wasn’t prepared for the tight, toned cheek to feel so incredible beneath my fingertips, and he wasn’t prepared for my touch. He jerked as he nearly choked on his spit.

  I looked up at him innocently. “Oops. I was just going for your wallet, sweetheart,” I teased. “Did I pick the wrong pocket?”

  His jaw tightened as he gazed down at me, heat in his eyes. I hoped I wasn’t misinterpreting it.

  “Be careful, Sierra. You know what happens when you go into places unannounced.”

  My eyes widened as I realized just what was happening. Jeremy and I were flirting. And I loved every second of it.

  Once the senior sitting at the table handed Jeremy the tickets, he surveyed the room. Danny was scowling in our direction, and Mallory was now looking at Jeremy if he were the new it-man she wanted a piece of.

  Over my dead body.

  Jeremy took us to an empty table on the other side of the room, where we sat down next to each other, our thighs brushing. We couldn’t have been sitting any closer to each other if we’d tried.

  “And that, my sweet Sierra, is exactly how it’s done.” He brushed his hands off as if he’d finished some exhausting project.

  Feeling bold, I leaned over and placed a kiss on his cheek. When I pulled back, I gave him a saucy wink. “Just so you know, that’s more than Danny ever got. If you play your cards right, you may get even luckier.”

  “Don’t go teasing a man, Sierra, if you don’t plan on following through.”

  I met his eyes. “Who says I won’t?”

  Silence, along with rounded eyes, answered me—he hadn’t expected me to say that.

  For the first time since I’d met him, I’d rendered Jeremy Banks speechless.

  It was minor, but it gave me hope. Things were changing.

  “Oh, Sierra,” Lexi breathed. Her eyes were shimmering with tears. Next to her, Mom was looking at me the same way. “Jeremy’s jaw is going to hit the floor.”

  My sister was disappointed that she hadn’t been asked to the dance. She’d planned on going with some girlfriends, but when she couldn’t find a dress, she’d opted to just stay home. Still, a part of me felt bad. She’d told me she’d be fine. Some new book had come out and she said she’d rather stay home and read. The stars in her eyes, however, told me the truth. It was her first high school dance, and instead of dressing up with me, she was just watching from the sidelines. But that was Lexi. She didn’t do anything half-assed, and if she didn’t have a flock of butterflies in her stomach at hello, she wasn’t interested. After what had happened with Danny, I got it, and I didn’t blame her for it.

  My cheeks flushed with heat. “Don’t be silly, Lexi. Jeremy doesn’t look at me that way.”

  She laughed and shook her head in disbelief. “Are you freaking kidding me? That’s the only way Jeremy looks at you.”

  Those same butterflies Lexi’s looking for attacked my stomach, making it clear that for me, Jeremy was the only one I wanted. Still, I willed myself to calm down. Lexi’s a romantic. She’d been hoping for a Jeremy-Sierra love connection since she’d discovered the L-word.

  “And what way is that?” I asked, hoping she’d spell it out for me. That maybe I wasn’t the only one who had noticed Jeremy’s change towards me.

  She sighed dreamily before her eyes rested on mine. “You know, I’ve always been a little bit jealous of your friendship with Jeremy.”

  I raised my eyebrows in surprise and opened my mouth to protest, but she held a hand up, stopping me.

  “From the moment the two of you met, you’ve been inseparable. This solid unit that nothing could ever come between. Sure, you guys included the rest of us, but that didn’t matter. It was always the two of you. And I don’t know when it happened, but sometime over the last year, things have changed.”

  Lexi paused to gauge my reaction, causing me to squirm under her scrutiny. Those damn butterflies took flight again. I sat on the edge of my bed, suddenly feeling a little bit dizzy and overwhelmed. Was she right? Things had changed. But I’d thought it was just me. Lexi had apparently noticed it, too.

  “What exactly do you mean, Lexi?” I asked, my voice a bit shaky.

  Mom and Lexi exchanged knowing glances.

  “Sierra,” Lexi said, “you walk into a room and Jeremy’s eyes light up. Then they track your every move. They narrow and his nostrils flare if another boy so much as checks you out. And, according to Jenna, he was a grumpy toad the whole summer until you got home. You know, kinda the same way you were in Ohio.”

  Even though my heart was fluttering, I protested. “That doesn’t mean anything. We’d never spent the much time apart. That’s all,” I said, waving her off.

  They exchanged another look.

  Mom crossed the room and sat next to me, placing an arm around my shoulders. “Oh, honey, that’s where you’re wrong. Everything your sister just said is true, and it’s not nothing. It means everything. The question is, do you feel the same way?”

  My eyes shimmered with tears. All of this time, I’d been keeping my feelings to myself, and it felt so good to finally let it out.

  I nodded. “I do. I have for a long time. But he’s my best friend, Mom. What if he doesn’t like me like that?”

  Mom wiped away a lone tear that had spilled over onto my cheek. Then she cupped my face and brought her forehead to mine. “Sweetheart, I don’t think that’s something you need to worry about. Jeremy Banks has always worn his heart on his sleeve, and I’m pretty sure you’re in that heart. He just needs to know you want to be.”

  “So…you think I should tell him?” I asked, wondering if tonight could be the start of something so new, so beautiful, with Jeremy.

  She pulled back and gave me a smile. “I can’t tell you what to do, Sierra. The best advice I can give is to follow your heart. I know how scary it can be, putting your heart on the line when you don’t know how it’s going to be received, but that’s what life and love are all about. Taking risks. You may get burned a time or two, but everything worth having is worth fighting for. And the way Jeremy looks at you? It’s the way eve
ry mother wishes her daughter would be looked at. It’s how your dad looks at me still to this day.”

  Lexi’s sniffling had my own tears welling up. She bounded across the room and joined us on the bed.

  “It’s true, Sierra. If a man ever looks at me that way, I’ll be the happiest girl alive,” she declared.

  Little did she know, it wouldn’t be long until she had that. And just like me, she’d be too blind to see it. But that’s her story to tell.

  This time, it was Mom’s turn to tear up. She put her arms around both me and Lexi, and the three of us looked at our reflections in the mirror.

  “When did my girls grow up?” she asked. “I swear you were just two little blondes with pigtails. Now, you’ve blossomed into beautiful young women I’m very proud of.”

  “Love you, Mom,” I whispered, and Lexi echoed my sentiment.

  “I love you both, too. And so does your father. Although he’s going to have a cow when he sees how grown-up Sierra is in that dress. We’re not ready for the two of you to grow up, but I guess it’s inevitable.”

  Before I could respond, the sound of the doorbell filled the room. Lexi clapped her hands, Mom beamed, and my stomach was suddenly twisting in knots.

  “He’s here!” Lexi exclaimed as she jumped up and ran to the door. But then she stopped and looked back at me, her face softening. “I hope you two have the best time, Sierra. You deserve it. And, for the record, Jeremy’s ten times the guy that creep Danny Moyer would ever be.” With a parting smile, she left the room with me reeling from her words.

  I smoothed my dress out and checked my makeup in the mirror. Mom was watching me intently, perceptive enough to know I was stalling.

  “Do you really think…?” I trailed off.