Blind Faith

by Kimberley Reeves

  “I hope I’m not late,” Will said as he entered the kitchen.

  “No, you’re right on time. Unfortunately for Rufus, that means he has to eat dog food again tonight.”

  Will chuckled, sending Rufus into a tail wagging fit. “I hate to kick him when he’s down but I can pretty much guarantee there won’t be any leftovers either.” He wandered over to the stove where Serena was just pulling out the pot roast. “It smells wonderful. Maybe I should have opted for some cooking classes instead of torturing myself with stale vending machine sandwiches and cardboard pizzas for so many years.”

  “Why didn’t you just hire someone to come in and cook for a few nights a week?”

  “I’m afraid my budget wouldn’t allow for anything as extravagant as that. I’m just a poor college student in debt up to my eyeballs who has stooped to begging his new house mate for a decent meal.”

  Serena couldn’t help feeling sorry for him. “Maybe we could strike some kind of deal,” she blurted out before giving it any real thought. “There are things I could use your help with that I either can’t do myself or have difficulty with. In exchange for your help, I would be willing to make dinner three or four times a week.” She paused for a moment to turn off the oven and retrieve a serving platter from the cupboard, wishing she had considered what being in such close proximity that often would do to her jittery nerves. But it was too late to retract the offer, so she forged on. “It’s nothing major or too time consuming, just little things like repairing a hole in the fence out back, taking the trash can out to the curb on Sunday nights, fixing the dripping faucet in the bathroom.”

  Will’s stomach rumbled as the enticing aroma of the roast wafted through the air. “You’ve got a deal, but I’m definitely getting the better end of the bargain.” He watched her move around the kitchen as effortlessly as a sighted person, his admiration for Serena growing by the minute. “Do you need any help carrying food to the table? And before you jump to any wrong conclusions, I’m offering because it’s the gentlemanly thing to do, not because I don’t think you are capable of handling it by yourself.”

  “You’re not going to let me forget what a fool I made of myself, are you?”

  “I swear I will only bring it up when I need to counter act my own foot-in-mouth blunders.”

  “In that case, I’ll let you put the roast and vegetables on the platter while I get the rolls out of the warmer and finish up the potatoes.”

  This isn’t so bad, Serena thought as she mashed the potatoes. She’d enjoyed her new found freedom from her worrisome mother, but it did get a bit lonely at times, even with Rufus here for companionship. She liked how laid back Will was, and she liked it that they could tease each other or simply work side by side in comfortable silence as if they were old friends. Not that they’d actually been friends back in high school, but she hoped they could develop that kind of relationship now. She hadn’t allowed herself to get close enough to anyone to form a true friendship since that awful night, but she didn’t want to be that frightened little girl anymore. Which meant she had to start trusting people again.

  “Help yourself,” she said once they were seated at the table. “Just make sure you put everything back in the same place or I’ll reach for a roll and end up plunging my hand into the mashed potatoes.”

  Will sliced off a generous portion of the roast and vegetables then spooned out a mound of potatoes, careful to place it in exactly the same spot before helping himself to the rolls. He watched in fascination as Serena reached out and felt for the edge of the platter with the roast, then inched her fingertips around until she found the knife and serving fork. Certain she was going to cut herself, he held his breath while she pierced the meat with the fork and slipped the knife between the prongs, cutting a perfectly even sliver off. Will didn’t breathe easy again until Serena finished filling her plate, and even then he kept waiting for her to hack off a finger with the steak knife she was using.

  “Rose tells me you’re a teacher,” he said, in an effort to focus on making conversation instead of the danger the sharp blade posed to her elegant hands.

  “Yes, I teach history at a school for the blind.”

  “I assume the textbooks are in Braille, but how do the students take notes or tests?”

  “Each student is equipped with a laptop computer that responds to voice commands. I provide them with a CD at the end of each class on the material we covered that day as well as a Braille copy of their homework. They enter their answers into the computer and I retrieve them the next day by saving them onto a flash drive. Sometimes I just plug it into the computer and let it read back the answers, but most of the time I print it off with a Braille embosser so I can read it.”

  “That’s…amazing, Serena.”

  “What? That a blind woman can become a teacher?”

  Will grinned when he noticed how her slender shoulders stiffened. “Actually, I was talking about the whole process of teaching blind students.”

  “Oh.”

  “Was it difficult to learn Braille?”

  “Not really. Braille is based on the arrangement of one to six dots within a cell. One dot represents an ‘A’, two dots placed horizontally is a ‘B’, and so on. It’s relatively simple and probably didn’t take me more than a few hours to memorize. Of course, it’s more difficult for children who are just learning to read.”

  “Soooo, penmanship isn’t really a consideration when you’re grading then.”

  Serena burst into laughter. “I think I’m going to like having you around, Will Duncan.”

  Her radiant smile did a number on his heart, and for that moment at least, Will was glad she couldn’t see the sappy grin he was sporting. He liked making her laugh and fully intended to make sure she did it quite often from now on. From what Rose had told him, Serena led a very solitary existence and her aunt was worried sick she would never put the past behind her and learn to live again. Outwardly, Serena didn’t appear timid or seem to be the type to shun forming relationships with people, and maybe she did have a circle of friends among the other teachers, but it never extended past the school grounds. Will was going to change all that.

  He’d purposely portrayed his reasons for wanting to live here as selfish ones, and that part was true. He did need a quiet place to study without being disturbed by a drunken roommate stumbling in with an even more intoxicated woman hanging all over him. But he also wanted to help free Serena from the demons that haunted her, and in the process…well, maybe he could rid himself of a few demons too. The night Serena was attacked had altered her life forever, but it had changed his life too. And now he was here to set things right.

  Chapter 2

  Serena finished grading the last of the essays and slipped it into her briefcase with the others. She had been disrupted a few times by the sound of Will hauling things upstairs, and had to stifle a wild giggle once or twice when there was a loud thump followed by muttered expletives. The noise had quieted down over an hour ago, and since she’d heard the shower running shortly after that, she assumed he was done for the night. It seemed strange having someone else in the house, but in a way it was comforting too.

  “Come on, Rufus,” she stood up and shuffled towards the kitchen, “it’s time for your nightly potty break and my nightly tea.”

  Serena let him out the back door then turned and took a few purposeful steps towards the stove when she had an unexpected encounter with a very firm, bare chest. Throwing up her hands was an automatic response, but splaying her fingers over the corded muscles so she could prolong the pleasurable sensations pulsing through her was as surprising to Serena as it was to Will. She felt his heartbeat jump, felt his lungs fill with air as he drew in a sharp breath, followed by a hissing sound as it was slowly expelled. Her behavior, and his reaction to it, was difficult enough to assimilate but Serena was even more perplexed to discover the raw fear that always speared through her whenever anyone got close enough to touch her was little more than a twinge
of apprehension.

  “I…uh…didn’t hear you come in,” she finally stammered when his warm hands settled lightly on her hips.

  Touching Will was one thing, but having him touch her sent that thread of apprehension spider webbing through her entire body until she felt every raw nerve quiver from it. What a pitiful existence she had; wanting to be normal and experience the same thrill other women did in the company of a man they liked, and yet unable to stop the gnawing fear that twisted her stomach into knots and made her feel as if she was going to throw up. Somehow, Serena doubted Will would still think she was an amazing woman if he knew how close she was to bolting like a scared little rabbit.

  “I’m sorry if I startled you,” she heard Will say through the haze of chaotic emotions rippling through her. “I’ll try to make a little noise coming down the stairs so you have some warning.”

  Will bit back a groan when she tilted her head back, placing her lips perilously close to his. At six foot four, he was used to having to lean down to kiss a woman, but Serena couldn’t have been more than five inches shorter than he was so it wouldn’t have taken much to close the gap between them. He envisioned lowering his mouth onto hers and tasting the sweetness he knew was waiting for him. Lord, he was tempted, and if he hadn’t felt the tremor of her body, he might not have stopped himself from doing it. Her fear of intimacy on any level was perfectly understandable, and if he wanted Serena’s trust he would have to earn it first.

  “I hope you don’t mind,” he tried to sound casual as he moved away from her. “I was coming down to pilfer another piece of your fabulous apple cobbler before hitting the books.”

  “H-help yourself. I was going to make some tea then head off to bed but I…I think I’ll skip it tonight.”

  Serena turned back towards the door, absently rubbing her hands down the sides of her jeans. She could still feel the heat of his skin against her palms and there was a strange tingling sensation that seemed to have migrated from her fingertips all the way up both arms. She was mortified by her behavior and was grateful Will had been kind enough to pretend he hadn’t noticed. After letting Rufus in, Serena mumbled a hasty good-night and left the kitchen as quickly as she dared. She was embarrassed enough as it was, she didn’t need to add to it by running into the wall or falling flat on her face!

  The entire time she was taking a shower, she kept having visions of Will as he’d looked in high school. Her girl friends practically salivated whenever he walked by, their breathless sighs even more pronounced if Anthony and Sawyer happened to be with him. They would go on and on about how tall Will was, what a fabulous body he had, how dreamy he was to look at, and though she couldn’t help noticing all those things too, it was his smile that always set her heart to racing. Like half the girls in school, she wondered what it would feel like to have Will Duncan kiss her, and for one brief moment in the kitchen Serena thought he was going to do it. God, what a disaster that would have been!

  As it was, she had narrowly escaped having a full-fledged panic attack in front of him and was lucky her shaky legs had held out long enough to carry her back to her room. She could still feel the weight of his hands on her hips; big, strong, capable hands that had sent a thrill racing through her entire body. It astonished her that she hadn’t reacted violently as she usually did when a man touched her. Even more shocking was that for a few fleeting moments she had actually liked it. Serena fumbled for the water handle, her brows drawing together as a vague memory began to stir.

  “You like that, don’t you? You like it when I touch you…”

  “It’s not the same,” she murmured to herself as she climbed out of the shower and dried off. “Will’s touch was different, and just because I liked it doesn’t mean I wanted him to…to…” No, she wouldn’t allow herself to finish that thought.

  Looping the towel over the rack, Serena made her way to the dresser and pulled out a silk nightgown and slipped it over her head. Even as she blow dried her hair and brushed it out, she couldn’t stop thinking about Will. He’d been here for less than one day and had already managed to shake up her quiet, hum-drum life. And to think she had planned to lay down the law about keeping to a schedule so they wouldn’t be using the kitchen at the same time! She’d volunteered to do it, for crying out loud, so what did that tell her? Serena slipped into bed with a disgusted sigh. It told her she was weak, and if she wasn’t careful she would be making Will dinner every night and offering to cook Sunday breakfast too!

  ***

  Will tumbled into bed, exhausted after four solid hours of reading and taking notes. In the three weeks he’d been living with Serena, they had fallen into a comfortable routine that seemed to suit them both, although he would have liked it better if he had more time to spend with her. He usually went to the campus library after classes and studied until five-thirty then headed for home so he could take a quick shower before dinner. Rose hadn’t been stretching the truth when she said Serena was an excellent cook, though it still made him a little uneasy whenever she used anything sharper than a butter knife.

  There had been a period of adjustment, which was only natural when two people were getting used to having each other around, but he was sure it was harder on Serena than it was on him. Twice during that first week he forgot to scoot his chair in after getting up from the table and still felt guilty as hell that she’d run into it and wound up with a few bruises as a result. But the one that really made him feel like an inconsiderate jerk was when he left his empty coffee cup sitting beside the sink instead of washing it out and putting it away.

  How many times had he watched in utter fascination as Serena moved around the kitchen with the confidence of a person who knew exactly what she was doing because she had memorized the precise location of everything in her house? And yet it hadn’t occurred to him that she wouldn’t expect the cup to be there, or that she would send it flying when her hand swept across the counter. Will was just coming downstairs to leave for his morning classes when he heard the crash as the cup hit the floor and shattered. His heart had slammed against his chest when he came racing in to find Serena on her hands and knees, gingerly feeling around for the broken pieces and cutting the tip of her finger in the process.

  He’d crossed the kitchen in three long strides and pulled Serena to her feet, alarmed to see how shaken she was by the incident. Her entire body was trembling as he led her to the sink and gently washed away the blood while he openly admitted to being an idiot and offered several heartfelt apologies. After drying the wound, he was relieved to find it was a minor cut, then cursed himself all over again when she refused to let him bandage it because it would inhibit her ability to read.

  “Honestly, I’m fine,” she said with a wobbly smile as she twisted away from the arm he’d looped around her waist.

  That’s when it finally hit him that it wasn’t the mishap with the cup or the cut on her finger that was making Serena so edgy; it was the fact that he had been touching her. He knew about the phobia she had developed. Rose warned him before he moved in, but he foolishly assumed the time he’d spent with Serena had put her at ease with him. It was a crushing blow to discover he was no closer to gaining her trust than he’d been on the first day he arrived here.

  Will closed his eyes, certain he would drop off to sleep in a matter of minutes, but his mind kept wandering back to that night when Serena hadn’t heard him come into the kitchen and run right into him. Her soft hands had seared his skin and her mouth had been so close to his, he’d felt the warmth of her breath on his lips. There had been an awareness of each other as a man and a woman, a connection he believed would continue to grow stronger as they got to know one another better. At least that’s what Will thought at the time, but now he wondered if he had only imagined it.

  Rose assured him Serena didn’t remember anything about the night she was attacked, but if that was true then why did she have such a negative reaction to being touched, and why was she plagued with nightmares nearly every nigh
t? He’d heard Serena crying in her sleep more than once, and a few times he’d gone down to check on her but she had usually quieted down by the time he got there. The one time he mentioned hearing her, she shrugged it off and insisted she never had bad dreams so he hadn’t brought it up again.

  That’s why he ignored it when the sound of her muted cries drifted up to him, and why he tried to block it out when it went on longer than normal. But when Serena let out a wail that sounded more like a wounded animal than a human being, he couldn’t bear listening to her suffer any longer. Will leapt out of bed and yanked on his jeans, his heart thumping erratically as he tore down the stairs and made his way through the darkened hallway to Serena’s bedroom.

  Even though the door was partially opened, he hesitated to enter without knocking. But when Serena cried out again, followed by a woeful whimper from Rufus, he pushed it open and stepped inside. It was too dark to see anything except the vague outline of the bed, and since he couldn’t tell where Rufus was, Will flipped on the light switch to avoid tripping over him.