Wanting (PAVAD)

by Calle J. Brookes

  “Leave your bag,” he told her. “You can’t stay here tonight. Not until the scene is cleared.”

  “But where will I go?” Her mouth trembled as she looked up at the fourth floor windows of her building.

  He made a split second decision. “With me. You still plan on helping me find Ashleigh, right?”

  “Yes. Someone has to help you look.” She breathed deeply and squared her shoulders, becoming Special Agent Sparks right before his eyes. He nodded in approval. Damned woman was stronger than he ever would have expected. “I’ll deal with this, and then we can keep looking for that kid.”

  “That’s it. Focus on that little girl when this starts to bother you.” He told her, moving one hand to the small of her back as they approached the glass entryway. “Pretend it’s just another crime scene. Can you do that?”

  “I can. I can get through this,” she whispered, unconsciously thrilling him when she moved just a bit closer. “I’m ready.”

  Hellbrook met her in the hallway, him and Dan Reynolds. The older man quickly hugged her, an embrace that she tolerated far longer than Sebastian would have expected. “Danny, where’s my cat? Where’s Linux?”

  “I didn’t see a cat, kiddo,” the man said, “But that doesn’t mean he wasn’t hiding. Carrie, they did a lot of damage. But the local LEOs need you to provide an inventory of what’s missing. I’ll go in with you if you want.”

  “No. That’s ok. Sebastian will.” She didn’t look at him, or at the other two men’s faces after her declaration. Just looked at the damage done to her door.

  Sebastian didn’t miss the other Unit Chief’s darkening expression. It surprised him, too. Until he remembered her words about how Hellbrook and Dennis had never stayed in her apartment for longer than half an hour at a time. Then remembered how he had been there for several hours. She was most likely more comfortable with him in her space than even those she worked so closely with.

  He didn’t pause to evaluate how her sudden trust affected him. He tucked her close to his side, not missing the sudden hostility on Reynolds’ or Hellbrook’s faces as his hand gripped her shoulder and they walked into her apartment. He’d deal with them later.

  Her indrawn breath was loud enough for the apartment’s entire occupants to hear, and covered Sebastian’s instinctive curse. Her couch had been slashed, the black leather sliced with an unforgiving knife in a pattern of vertical tears intersecting with diagonals. Her glass and chrome coffee table—the one on which she’d sat his first night in her place—had been shattered into a thousand smaller pieces. Just the legs and trim remained, and even those were bent. Her potted plants were uprooted, dirt spread ruthlessly down the steps separating the kitchen from the living area. Sebastian didn’t even look toward the bedroom off the back of the loft. His attention was suddenly focused right back on her.

  “Carrie. Breathe, baby. Focus.” He saw the panic settling in her eyes. She turned to him immediately, and her thin shoulders squared. She nodded, and he knew she was remembering their earlier conversation in the car. “Let’s find the cat. Then make a list of what’s missing.”

  “Linux.”

  “Where would he be?” Sebastian asked softly. He was aware of Dr. Dennis moving closer, one hand reaching for Carrie. He shook his head at her warningly. Carrie didn’t need sympathy at that moment, didn’t need Dennis or the rest of the team—which he saw spread out amongst the local law enforcement officers—coddling her. She needed to focus on what she was doing, and then get out for a while until she could better deal with it.

  “He’s hiding. He’s not used to people. He’s just met you, Paige, and Georgia. Not even Hell. He’s shy.” She whispered in a confiding tone. He could see the obvious love she felt for her cat in her big eyes. “All these people, they bother him. They scare him. He’s hiding. Probably where it’s dark and he can’t see them.”

  “Carrie,” Dennis said, her voice trailing off when Carrie refused to focus on her. Dennis looked at Sebastian for direction, surprise and speculation in her dark eyes.

  “There are too many people in here for her at the moment.” Sebastian realized, when Carrie’s arms wrapped around her stomach and she began to rock ever so slightly. Sensations bothered her; she’d told him that. Told him that it was worse when she was highly stressed. What would be more stressful for Carrie than the destruction of her sanctuary? Nothing. “In her home. She doesn’t like people in her space. Not at all. You, Paige, Hellbrook, and I—we’re the only ones to be here at all—ever.”

  “Everybody but Lorcan and Carrie—out!” Dennis ordered, in a surprisingly effective tone. Not even the local cops questioned her sudden directive. In less than thirty seconds everyone was out in the hall, with the exception of Carrie, Sebastian, and the one local LEO chosen to make sure the two federal agents didn’t tamper with the scene. He blended seamlessly, efficiently in the background.

  “Call for him,” Sebastian ordered her in a soft but firm tone. “See if he’ll come out at the sound of your voice.”

  “Linny? Linny? Linux? Where are you, baby?” It took another two minutes of this before a thin and plaintive meow was heard coming from the back wall. “He’s in the computer room.”

  “How did he get in there? Did you shut him up in there when you left?”

  “No. He has a tunnel. From the bathroom, under the sink, through the base of the wall, and into the vent. I put a flap in when I realized he found the hole under the sink. I didn’t know he could open the cabinet door. But he did! Smart cat.”

  “Carrie, you need to check your computer room. See if everything is still in there.”

  “How would someone have known they were in there?” Carrie asked. “You and Paige are the only ones who know about the room.”

  Sebastian stood behind her as her hand rose to work the tiny, almost imperceptible mechanism to swing the door open. He vaguely heard the cop’s surprised exclamation. To Sebastian’s eye, the room looked completely undisturbed.

  Carrie went straight to the center console, where the big black cat lay on top quivering. Linux, on the other hand, looked horrible. His hair stood on end, over two inches of dark black spikes rising from his body. Sebastian looked closer; some sort of gel coated the beast’s fur. As he moved further into the room behind Carrie, he caught the strong scent of vanilla. Shampoo? Why would the cat be covered with shampoo?

  Carrie picked him up and cuddled him tightly, her lips forming the softest little cooing sounds. The cat began to purr. Sebastian ran an eye over the beast, checking for anything else out of the ordinary with the cat. His ear was bleeding. And there was another raw spot on one back leg. Like someone had grabbed him by the fur and yanked.

  “Carrie? Is everything all right in here?” When she nodded he turned toward the officer waiting just outside the computer room. “Good. Let’s close it up, now. Unless you want everyone else to know about it?”

  “No!” Her eyes widened and she looked around his shoulder at the cop staring in curiosity at the both of them. “I forgot he was here!”

  “Officer…Thompson?” Sebastian turned toward the other man. “You understand that this is a private room? That Agent Sparks doesn’t want anyone to learn of its existence? Like a panic room?”

  “Of course. As long as it doesn’t turn out to be pertinent to my investigation. Nothing’s missing, you say?” the officer said, looking at Carrie with a mix of sympathy and interest. “Agent Sparks?”

  “No. This room is exactly as I left it.”

  “Can you give me an approximate list of what you think may be missing from the rest of the loft?” Thompson asked. “Is your cat ok, miss?”

  “He’s fine. Don’t know why there’s shampoo all over him, though.” Carrie stroked the cat between the ears. “He needs ointment on his ear.”

  “We’ll take him to an all night vet. But first, you need to go through the house and look. I’ll have him carried to my vehicle, ok?”

  “By a stranger? He won’t like that.” />
  “I’ll get Dennis to do it.” She was holding up remarkably well. But he didn’t want to push her too much. “Then we’ll make a list, and get out of here for a while. Until the police can get finished, deal?”

  “Deal. We’ll find Ashleigh while Hell finds out who did this.”

  Chapter 23

  *****

  Sebastian carried the vanilla-scented cat out into the hallway, where Hellbrook and the rest of his team waited, worry written on their faces. “Dr. Dennis?”

  “Yes? How is she?” the woman asked, moving out from behind Hellbrook. Sebastian looked down at her—she really was a small woman—and smiled. He needed her cooperation. And he was genuinely fond of the woman he’d helped save two months ago.

  “Understandably upset, but better now that we’ve found this.” He lifted the cat slightly. The beast hissed at the gathering of strangers. Sebastian tightened his hold. “We need someone to take him to my car.”

  “And you want Georgia to do it?” Hellbrook asked, skeptically. “That thing will shred her.”

  “Carrie says he’s just shy. And only Georgia can carry him.”

  Dennis sighed, took the beast gently, and held him away from her slightly. “I don’t suppose she has a carrier for him?”

  “Uh, no. She didn’t mention one. And I think she would have mentioned it. I somehow doubt he’s left the apartment since moving in.” Sebastian handed her the keys to his vehicle. “Just put him in the backseat. We’ll take him to a vet once we leave here.”

  “Once you leave here, you mean?” Hellbrook asked. Sebastian wasn’t blind to the animosity wafting off her unit chief. It was stronger than the vanilla on the cat. He knew Hellbrook was protective, but he just didn’t care. Carrie was an adult—she didn’t need Daddy Hellbrook smothering her. Even now.

  “Yes. She’s staying with me. We’re working on a project for a friend of mine. And she can’t stay here tonight.” Sebastian heard the challenge in his own voice, but he didn’t back down.

  Why was it so important to him that Hellbrook to step down?

  “We thought she’d go home with K.D. this evening.” Reynolds said, stepping between the two younger men. “She stays in hotels with her all the time. Thought that would be easiest for Carrie.”

  They hadn’t even bothered to consult her. She was a grown woman, capable of getting this far on her own. He wondered how much of her history her team actually was aware of. If they knew just how long she had been on her own.

  “She’s already agreed to come with me,” Sebastian said, bluntly. He wasn’t backing down unless Carrie told him to. “It was her decision. Her choice. One she’s perfectly capable of making.”

  “Was it?” Hellbrook asked softly. “I’ll be making sure of that.”

  “I’m sure you will.” Sebastian nodded at Dennis, and the now pliant cat hanging limp in her hands. He said not another word as he turned and reentered the apartment. Carrie stood by her kitchen island, a forlorn look on her pretty face. “Carrie?”

  “Nothing is missing, Sebastian.” Her voice held clear puzzlement and he stepped closer. His hand rose automatically to caress her arm through the wine-colored hoodie she wore. “All my electronics, all my jewelry, all my paintings and prints, all my CDs, my keyboard, my guitars. Anything worth any money—it’s all here. I don’t understand. I don’t understand.”

  Sebastian didn’t either, because if nothing was missing, nothing taken, then why the hell had someone targeted her?

  Her place, while not completely secure, was still not easily accessible. Someone had to actually work to get inside the building far enough to reach the elevator that led directly to her floor. The staircase wasn’t even directly accessible.

  Not an easy place for a random act of vandalism. And if nothing was missing, the only question in Sebastian’s mind was why?

  “You absolutely sure nothing is missing, Agent Sparks?” Officer Thompson asked.

  “Yes. I’m sure. Sebastian, why would someone do this and not take anything?” She turned toward him, her eyes so puzzled, so hurt, that he didn’t stop to think, just pulled her to his chest.

  “I don’t know, baby.” Sebastian was beginning to have his suspicions. The bastard or bastards who’d done this were in a rage. Most likely a rage against Carrie. “But we’ll figure it out. Are you ready to go?”

  “Yes.” She dropped her head to his chest, closed her eyes. He gave her a moment, suspecting she just needed to block out the sight of the destruction of her sanctuary for a little bit. Needed to feel someone around her protecting her from what had happened. He’d gladly do it.

  “I think Hellbrook wants to talk to you for a moment. Then we’ll go. We’ll take Linux to the vet, and then head to my place. Work on finding Ashleigh, ok?”

  She nodded, opened her eyes, just looked up at him. Sebastian’s hands tightened around her, settled on her waist. He cuddled her closer, dropped a kiss on her lips without thought. He was encouraged when she didn’t pull away. He deepened the kiss, running his tongue over her lips, darting inside for just a little taste.

  Then he pulled back, aware of Carrie’s door being opened again. He gently set her away from him, as Hellbrook and Reynolds entered, followed by Norton. “You ready?”

  She nodded.

  “I’ll be outside talking to the locals. You gather anything you think you may need over the next few days and deal with Daddy Reynolds and Mommy Hellbrook. I’ll be back in a minute.”

  “Ok.” She nodded, firmed her chin. “I can do this. I can.”

  “I never doubted you for a moment.” He nodded at Hellbrook and Norton, then stepped outside. He’d question the locals and the rest of Carrie’s team. Find out what was being tossed around between them. Because his hackles were raising, and every instinct he possessed was telling him this wasn’t random.

  Someone had targeted Carrie deliberately.

  Chapter 24

  *****

  Carrie didn’t want Sebastian to leave. Didn’t want to face the destruction of her apartment alone. Still, this was her problem to deal with. Not his.

  It would be too easy for her to be dependent on him right now. She never would have expected that. Everything she’d observed of him before he’d shown up at her apartment had frightened her. He was intense, cold, and swift with censure for agents that didn’t pull their own weight.

  But he was also supportive and helpful to those agents who did their jobs and beyond. She’d seen that a few times, and Paige had confirmed that. Said that he was a very compassionate team leader under the initial exterior. He cared—that’s why he did the job. She’d seen that in the way he’d searched for Ashleigh. In the way he’d held her while she’d cried earlier. He cared about her, too.

  Regardless of his slightly abrasive attitude, he cared. And she admired that. Found it very attractive. He’d smelled nice, when he’d held her, like mint. Felt strong beneath his black polo when she’d been pressed up against him. He’d tasted like coffee and chocolate M&Ms. She’d seen him consume the candy on the ride back from Indiana.

  He’d kissed her. She’d have to think about that. When she got the chance.

  Hell wrapped one hand around her arm, pulled her closer. It felt different when he touched her, compared to Sebastian. What did that mean for her? She cared about Hell and knew he cared about her. But Sebastian’s touch felt different. “Are you ok, Sparkie?”

  “No. I’m upset. Why would someone do this?” She’d done nothing to anyone, she went to work, came home, kept to herself—except for her work with the runaways. But they wouldn’t do this to her. And she’d certainly never brought them to her home. She made sure to keep Carrie-the-counselor separate from Carrie-the-agent. She’d brought very few people to her home—Paige, Georgia, Hell, Dan, and now Sebastian. That was it. She didn’t even let her neighbors on her floor. “Break all my stuff? Destroy my home? It doesn’t make sense to me.”

  “I don’t know. But I’m going to find out,” Hell said. Carrie
looked at him closely. She heard the anger behind his words. She’d heard him angry before. “Carrie…”

  “Yes?”

  “About Lorcan…”

  “Sebastian? What about him? Did he say something? Does he have any ideas who did this?”

  “No. How long have you been helping him?”

  “Night before last. You were still in Tennessee. He needed my help to find his friend’s little girl. Ashleigh. She’s fourteen and has run away.”

  “He called you?” Hell asked. Dan and Zeke were listening, Carrie could see them watching her and Hellbrook. Why? Why was it so important to them that she had been with Sebastian? “Why you?”

  “Computer searches and because both our teams were on assignment. I really was the only one available to help. Why?” Carrie felt the anxiety rising again, and she started rocking. She knew she was close to flipping out in front of the rest of the team, but she couldn’t stop. Not this time.

  “Honey, I’m glad you went with him,” Hell said. Did he know how close she was to shutting down? Carrie hoped not, hoped she’d kept it hidden. “I’m just concerned for you. He kissed you. We all saw it. And it wasn’t just platonic on his part. Promise me you’ll be aware of that.”

  “Ok.” Carrie was confused. Why was this any of Hell’s business? “I don’t know why you’re worried. I’ve kissed men before. Done a lot more than that.”

  Hell’s cheeks reddened. Was he embarrassed? Why? “Still, I want you to promise me you’ll be careful, ok?”

  “Ok. I promise.” Sometimes it was just easier for her to agree with her team, even when she didn’t understand them.

  “Good. Are you sure you want to stay with him? We can get you a hotel room or you can stay with any of us.”

  “No. Sebastian needs my help. I’ll stay with him. I stayed with him last night.” Carrie grabbed the bag of cat food—half of which had been dumped over her stove. “I think this is all I’ll need, Hell.”