Marry Grinchmas

by ChaShiree M

  Asshole! Steeling myself, I turn around and face the douche. I take a second to look at him and wonder for the life of me what I saw in him. I know I am comparing him to Ham, but seriously, it is comparing apples to oranges. Jasper is clearly a little boy living a man’s life. He would never have been the type of husband I needed and wanted. He is handsome enough, I suppose, with the beach blonde hair and the piercing blue eyes. His body is in shape for a man that hardly ever lifts a finger to do anything, but there is something elemental and basic missing about him. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but I know whatever it is, Ham has it in spades. Oh well, might as well get this over with.

  “Jasper. What are you doing here?” I ask, getting straight to the point. What I did not expect was what happened next.

  He walks over to me and stares straight at my face and says “I want my fiancé` back.” The recoil I feel is automatic. Before I can protest how wrong that whole statement is, he grabs me by the waist and kisses me. I am completely stunned for a second, but by the time I come to my senses, I hear “Oh fuck no!!!!” I knew this was going to be a clusterfuck.

  WHAT THE FUCK DID I just witness? I don’t want to admit how much it hurts to see that douche kiss my girl. “Are you fucking kidding me with this shit?” I say pulling Avalynn behind me. “Are you ok babe?” I ask her, but since I saw the whole thing go down, I doubt it.

  “Who the fuck, are you?” Jasper asks.

  “This is Hammond.” Avlalynn says before I have chance to set this prick straight.

  “Are you slumming it with him, and why?” Jasper says.

  “He’s a friend, not that it is any of your damn business Jasper.”

  “A friend? Are you kidding me babe? You know its way more than that.” I growl out through clenched teeth.

  “Ham. Now is not the time or place for this.” Not the time and…is she fucking kidding me right now? I was just balls deep in her pussy, seeing rainbows and shit, picturing her swollen and round with my kid, and now is not the time to discuss how she just relegated me to a God damn friend in front of this tool?

  “Avalynn. Don’t fuck with me right now. I walk in here to see him with his hands and his fucking mouth on you, and now you’re calling me a friend? This is enough to give a guy not so nice ideas, babe.”

  She lowers her head and doesn’t look at me for a second. I feel my gut tighten because whatever she is thinking can’t be good. Instead of answering me, though, she addresses douchetard. “Jasper seriously, what are you doing here and how did you find me?”

  “You are my fiancée and I came to bring you back home. After our falling out, I took a few days to cool my jets and think about what I want for my life. I know what I did was wrong, in hindsight. But seriously Lynn, you have to admit any guy in my position would have done the same. Making me wait was cruel, especially after I proposed.” Jasper pipes in.

  It is taking everything I have to keep from kicking this guys ass. Is he serious right now? He is trying to blame her for his fuck-up? This guy is classic. I didn’t even know they still built ‘em like this. Weak.

  “I’ve decided I needed a wife like you. You are sweet, giving, and innocent.”

  A chuckle leaves my mouth before I can attempt to hold it in. Innocence is no longer an affliction she has. I got that shit up and running. I look at Avalynn and see the color of her face turn pink. I know she is thinking of what we did all night. She better be thinking about me. I see when she realizes that she doesn’t have to deal with this. She lifts her head and I can seriously see the steam pop out of her ears. Then she makes me proud.

  “I broke up with you asshole. You had sex with ten different girls that I know about. Who does that?”

  “You weren’t giving it up and I’m a man, I have needs that you weren’t meeting. If you weren’t such a prude that never would have happened” The jackass says. “Now let’s go home and talk about this in private, not in front of strangers.” Who the hell is he calling a stranger? And he is so fucked if he thinks he is going to take her anywhere?

  “You are not a man. How the fuck do you cheat on a Goddess? Instead of getting your dick wet, you should have been on your knees worshiping the ground she walks on. You are a fucking idiot to do anything that would upset her, let alone cheat on her. Loyalty is the key and you have none.” I turn to look at my woman. “Are we done with the piece of shit, Avalynn?”

  “Uh, yeah! Fuck you, Jasper. Don’t fucking come near me again. You are smarmy and deceitful. I am so motherfucking glad I never let you come near me with your tiny, diseased dick” Whoa! Ok. This is some shit.

  “What the fuck do you mean diseased?” Jasper shouts. People are staring at us and I don’t give a fuck. This is getting good. Now I see why people watch that Jerry dude.

  “You might want to get checked out. The real classy stripper from that space ship strip club on Dale Mabry, said she caught something from you.”

  “Which one?” He asks. Which one? Is this fucktard insinuating he slept with more than one? He is definitely not good enough for my baby.

  “Are you fucking kidding me? Your father is a senator. You want to be a senator. You fucked more than one stripper bareback? Then you were goanna fuck me with that dirty dick? This gets better and better.”

  She shocks the shit out of me when she lunges at him. I pull her back just before she junk punches him. He puts his hands up and backs away from her, finally getting the picture.

  “You won’t see me again. Our NDA is still in place. Don’t say anything to anyone.”

  “I have no intention of airing your dirty ass laundry anywhere. You did it yourself. Take a look around at all the people with their cell phones out. Dumbass.” “Let’s go Ham,” she says, grabbing my hand and pulling me away from that train wreck.

  As soon as we are alone, I pull her into the unisex bathroom in the hotel lobby and lock the door behind us.

  “Friends,” I say as I kiss her neck. “Do you fuck all of your friends?” I am beyond pissed but her sexy ass still turns me on. I know I shouldn’t fuck her angry, but there is no way I can wait to get her ass home.

  “You know I don’t.” She moans as I pull her sweats down to her knees while kissing her lips. I roughly turn her and bend her over the counter, getting her into position from the ride. I am solid hard as she has brought out the caveman in me. Unbuttoning my pants and fisting my cock, I smooth my hands down her tight ass, giving her a slap on the right cheek and then left cheek. When she gasps, I slam into her tight wet heat where I can see the glistening juices on her parted thighs. I reach my thumb around to her clit and bring her off.

  This is a fast fuck to remind her that she is mine. She moans into the crook of her arm, but it isn’t enough to muffle the sound. With each thrust into her tight pussy, I remind her who she belongs to. “Friends huh. My ass. You. Are. Mine. I love you. Don’t. Fucking! Forget. That.” Unexpectedly I cum more than I have before. With each stream that shoots into her pussy, I can picture it as they take root and make her round and supple with my kid. It will let everyone in the whole fucking town know who she belongs to.

  I am just pulling out of her when there is a pounding on the door. Tucking my cock back into my pants first, I then pull her pants up. Laying a kiss on her lips I remind her, “don’t ever downgrade what we have baby. I won’t take it too calmly next time. You understand me?”

  Still in a fog, she licks her lips and nods her head. “I do know and I love you, but I wanted him gone and not running back to my town telling my business. Especially to my mom. You have no idea what she is like sometimes. Ask my Nana.”

  The pounding on the door is still going and annoying as fuck. I open the door and I am greeted by an even more annoying, unwelcome blast from the past.

  “Well fuck, this day keeps getting better and better.” I say as Avalynn comes up under my arm.

  “Elizabeth?” She says, incredulous.

  “Ava? Is that you? It’s been forever.” Elizabeth says, grabbing her hand
s.

  “Yeah. Not fucking long enough.” I turn to Avalynn as she drops Elizabeth’s hands like they are poison. I arch my eyebrow at her because I didn’t even know they knew each other, let alone that they had bad blood.

  “How do you know Elizabeth?” I ask.

  “Frenemies from way back.” Avalynn says with a sneer. Ooh, my sweet girl has a catty streak it seems.

  “You guys are together?” Elizabeth asks as she is gesturing between us.

  “Yes.” I say, wrapping my arm around Avalynn’s shoulder. “Can we help you?”

  “That is interesting, given our history.” I feel Avalynn flinch. Fuck. I need this like I need a hole in my head. Elizabeth laughs and touches my forearm. I jerk my arm away from her talons.

  “Wow! What are you doing here? I thought you were a real estate agent.” I say.

  “I was, or, I am. My grandfather passed away and left his place to my sisters and me. We are slowly remodeling.” She says, her face softening.

  “I am sorry for your loss. He was a good man.” she shrugs her shoulders in a way I come to expect from her.

  “Anyway, you guys can’t have sex in a public bathroom. I am going to have to ask you to leave.”

  I say “we were just leaving” at the same time Avalynn says “What history?”

  Before I can say anything, Elizabeth chimes in “Ah honey, you didn’t know? We were engaged about three years ago.” That is not fucking true, but Avalynn doesn’t give me time to explain. She runs out of the bathroom and out into the lobby. If looks could kill, Elizabeth’s will set the world on fire.

  “Are you insane?” I ask her.

  “No, Ham. Finally getting a little revenge. You ruined my life asshole. Good luck with her, because she can hold a grudge.”

  Fuck my life, I think as I run after my girl.

  ENGAGED! I CAN’T WRAP MY mind around it. Ham was engaged to her. It’s not the fact that he was engaged that has me upset because everyone has a past, it’s that he was engaged to her. Elizabeth. She is so far from the type of person I am, and hearing her say that made me realize I have been deluding myself yet again by thinking Ham and I could have a future. If Elizabeth is the type of woman, substance, and means he likes, then there is no hope for us. I could never measure up to her and I am done trying to be something I am not.

  I hear Ham yelling my name, but right now I want to go to my Nana’s and cry. As I make it to the truck in record time I ask “Max can you please take Nana and me back to her house?” I see the indecision in his eyes and hear Ham yelling “Max don’t you move that fucking truck. I swear to God Max.”

  “Max please. I don’t want to talk to him right now. Please.” I know he is going to do what Ham says, but then Nana says “You heard her Max. Drive. When a woman asks you for something, it’s the gentlemanly thing is to do as she asked. Lawd. I told you’re mama she wasn’t done raising y’all yet.”

  Thank God for Nana. He starts the truck and speeds off like lightning. I glance back and see Ham standing there with his head hanging and his shoulders hunched like he is about to morph into the Hulk or something. I want to get out and go to him, but it’s too much pain knowing that I should have stuck to my plan.

  Nana looks at me with questions and I give her a slight shake of my head, letting her know I am not doing this in the car with his brother. When I look up, his brother is giving me the same look, and I. I just can’t. The whole ride I am conscious of the stares I am getting from both of them, but I don’t care. Knowing that he likes his women rich, bitchy, and trashy has me feeling used in the worst way; and I don’t know what to do. What could he possibly want with me, other than to say he broke my cherry? I am nothing like her.

  We finally pull up to the house, and I jump out before Max can say anything. I run inside as fast as my feet can carry me. I enter and have an overwhelming feeling of emptiness, which makes no sense. I barely know him. So how can I feel like I just lost the one thing I have been searching for my whole life?

  “Girl you wanna tell me what happened? You took off like your britches was on fire. What made you run this time?” I flinch as she says that because from the outside looking in, that is exactly what it looks like. I run. But seriously, can you blame me?

  “I found out he was engaged to Elizabeth McIntosh and I couldn’t believe it. We are complete opposites, and it hit me that I don’t know anything about him. What could he really want with me when he marries girls like that?” I know I’m spiraling at this point, but panic has set in. Is this always going to be my life? Me, alone?

  “Girl, slow down. Now who in the Holy Hell told you they used to be engaged?”

  “Elizabeth.”

  “And what did Ham say?”

  “I don’t know. I just got out of there.”

  “Ah. You ran without listening to the man you love.”

  “Love…Nana I just met him. I don’t lo…”

  “Now child, you might be able to fool yourself, but I been around this town a few times. I know love at first sight when I see it. You need to sit your obstinate butt down and listen to an old lady for a second. I swear you are just like your mama. An ear full of wax and the temperament of an alley cat.” What the hell is she going on about?

  “Ham was no more engaged to that plastic trollop than you would have been happy with the Ken doll.” “But, she said…” “Shut it and listen. She has a grudge against Ham because he exposed her. Three or four years ago Ham went away to some training school their father insisted all the boys go to. He would only send them one at a time, and for a year each, to help prepare them to take over the family business.

  While Ham was away, Max and Elizabeth began seeing each other. The whole town thought it was serious, including Max. If anybody had asked me, I would have told them that girl got so many miles, even a rotation wouldn’t fix all those uses.” Lord. I smack my forehead with my hand. What the hell is wrong with her, the sweetest old lady but vile sometimes. God I love her!

  “When Max went away, he thought she would wait for him to get back. Ham came home after Max left and he and Elizabeth started seeing each other.”

  Ugh. That is even worse he stole his brothers’ girlfriend.” I didn’t mean to say it out loud, but the way she just popped me in the lip says I did. I can’t remember the last time I was physically punished. Ghee’s! She is still a pistol.

  “Hush your mouth and stop jumping to conclusions. Ham didn’t know about her and Max until Max came home. Don’t ask me how a secret like that stayed hidden in a small town like this, but no one breathed a word. I could only surmise people wanted to see the fallout. To make a long story short: when Max came home, he caught them in bed together. They fought. When Ham realized what happened, he dropped her; but Max was too but hurt to listen. They hadn’t spoken in three years, until this morning with you.”

  Oh God. If this is true, then what did I do? Jumping off the couch, intent on finding Ham and apologizing, I make it to the door just as I hear someone pull up. Relief floods through my body because he came for me. I ran from him and didn’t listen to what he had to say, and he still came for me. Love for this man is all I feel right now.

  “AvaLynn get your fine stubborn ass out here right now, woman. Don’t make me come and get you.” Hmm, that sounds promising.

  I AM BEYOND PISSED. THAT bitch has fucked with this family for the last time. I fly into Greta’s driveway and throw her grandmother’s car into park. I rush to the door and shout “AvaLynn get your fine, stubborn ass out here right now, woman. Don’t make me come and get you.” When she throws the front door open and hesitates, I know what she is looking for. I open my arms as she flies into them. I catch her and spin around.

  “Ham, I’m sorry I ran from you. I didn’t want to look like a fool again. But…I love you.” She says with a sigh of resignation. So fucking cute. Even when she is professing her love for me, she struggles with the inevitability of her future.

  I lift her face to mine and look deep into her
ocean blue eyes so when I say this she knows it’s the truth, and nothing but. I would rather cut off my man meat then to lie and hurt her. “I was never engaged to that evil incarnate.”

  “I know.”

  “Oh, you know do you?”

  “Yes. My Nana told me everything about what she did to you and Max. I am so sorry I didn’t give you a chance to explain.”

  “It’s ok baby. Just don’t let it happen again. You have questions, doubts, or just want to plan on annoying, me it doesn’t matter; you come to me. Understand?”

  “Yes, Ham. I understand.”

  “Ok. Let’s go home baby.”

  As we turn to get in the truck, I see Greta leaning in her open doorway. “It’s about time you two get your heads out of your asses. Young folks. Indecisive. You two get on. It’s supposed to snow again soon. Gimme my keys, Hammond.” I can’t help but chuckle at her. For as long as I can remember, her and my mom has been bosom buddies, and Greta hasn’t changed one bit.

  “Well, if she didn’t inherit your stubborn streak this would have been wrapped up days ago, ornery old woman.”

  Smack. Did she just muff me?

  “Who are you calling ornery? Now get that girl outta here before she finds another reason to run from you.” Hell, she’s gotta point. Better get her to the house and tied down.

  Chuckling, I hand the keys to Greta and kiss the crazy old lady on the cheek. Trudging back to my truck where Avalynn has already gotten inside, I run around to the driver’s side and start it up to drive home. Our home.

  Once inside, I divest us of our coats and pull her into my arms. I kiss her until we are breathless beside the big leather sofa in the middle of my living room. Sitting her on the middle cushion as I kneel between her legs, I grasp her left hand in mine. First I have to adjust my cock, as it is pretty painful in this position.