Where the Light Glows

by Dena Blake

  “Not really.” Mel’s voice softened.

  Izzy planted a hand against the tree on either side of her and moved closer. Mel could feel her warm breath on her lips. God help her, she wanted desperately to kiss them. “But you said…” Izzy’s words were barely audible. Mel flipped her gaze from Izzy’s mouth to her innocent blue eyes, seeing the vulnerability in them.

  Mel stared into the deep pools of blue. She couldn’t think with her this close. “We both said a lot of things.” She steadied herself against the tree, her mind hazy. She didn’t know what to think anymore. “For God’s sake, Izzy. I need you to keep your distance.” Mel slipped under her arm and hurried to the edge of the pond.

  Izzy pushed off the tree and followed her. “You don’t talk to me for months, and now you tell me you’re not okay with it?”

  Mel watched the ducks dipping their heads in and out of the water. “Are you still seeing her?”

  “I was never seeing her.” She took in a deep breath and blew it out. “You know, when I first met you all I wanted to do was get in your pants.”

  “And?”

  “And then I got to know you.” She studied the ground. “Now I’ve hurt you.”

  “That’s a fucking understatement.”

  Izzy’s head snapped around at her choice of words.

  She watched a family of ducks swim across the pond. “Why Dana?”

  “It was the night I saw the tabloid. I got really drunk. I mean, carry-me-out-of-the-bar drunk.” She raked her fingers through her hair. “The last thing I remember is the bartender telling me the wine bottle was empty. The next morning I woke up next to Dana and had no idea how I got there.” Her soft blue eyes were glassy and filled with regret. “Will you ever be able to forgive me?”

  “You shouldn’t worry about that right now. Bella’s sick. You need to take care of her.”

  “You didn’t answer my question.” Izzy moved closer and took her hand, stroking the back of it with her thumb. “Can you forgive me for being such a fucking idiot?”

  Mel tried to shake the jolt afflicting her midsection. “I…” She pulled her hand away and slapped it to her neck, trying to rub away the unwanted tingle rushing it. She hadn’t expected her feelings for Izzy to remain so strong. “I need more time, Izzy.”

  “I guess that’s the least I can give you.” Izzy leaned forward, pressed her cheek to Mel’s, and held it there for a few minutes. “You can see Bella anytime you want,” she whispered in her ear before backing up and turning toward the lake.

  “Thank you.” She was back. The warm vulnerable, compassionate woman she’d met that first night in the alley behind the restaurant. “You deserve someone better than Dana.”

  “You think so?”

  “I do.”

  “Someone like you?”

  Mel’s insides quivered, and she shot out a breath. “What makes you think I’m any better?”

  “You visit my mother every day. She likes you. Bella’s a very good judge of character, you know.” Izzy turned to face her, capturing her gaze. “And even after…you’re still here.” She reached up to brush her thumb across Mel’s cheek but pulled back, letting her hand drop to her side. “You’re notches above Dana.”

  Mel’s cheeks flushed, and Izzy spun around and headed back to the hospital.

  “Izzy, wait.” Mel ran to keep up with her.

  Izzy didn’t slow as she slipped through the electronic doors, almost running into them as they opened. She rushed down the hall, pulled open the door to Bella’s room, and went straight to the windows.

  Mel glanced at Bella and saw she was asleep before continuing on to the window, moving in behind Izzy. She fought the natural urge to snake her arms around her waist. Instead, she put her hands on Izzy’s arms and squeezed. “There’s nothing you can do to change the fact she’s not going to be around forever.” Mel eased her forehead to Izzy’s back. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. The scent of lemon and verbena filled her head. She’d missed it desperately.

  “I’m so sorry I hurt you, Mel.” Izzy’s voice cracked as she turned into Mel’s arms and looked into her eyes. Mel could see the strained emotion in them. Then came the tears. She pulled her in, holding her closely as Izzy sobbed into her shoulder. This felt so right. Being here, holding Izzy, comforting her. The woman she loved. The woman she loved. Fear tore through her. Did it really matter that she’d slept with Dana? She tensed. Will I ever be able to trust her again? Suddenly she couldn’t stop her own tears. What am I going to do?

  At the sound of the glass door sliding open, Izzy immediately let go of Mel and turned back to the window.

  “Hey,” Angie said.

  “Hey.” Mel wiped the tears from her face. “How are you?” she asked, trying to deflect attention away from Izzy.

  “Good. How’s Mom?”

  “About the same today, I’m afraid,” Mel said, watching Izzy intently as she crossed the room to her sister.

  Angie sat down next to the bed and held Bella’s hand. “She looks so frail.”

  “This has taken a lot out of her,” Izzy whispered. Standing behind Angie, she leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

  “I don’t like seeing her like this.”

  “I know, honey. None of us do. The doctor said once she gets the transfusion, she should be better. Then we can take her back home.” Izzy seemed to have compassion for everyone but herself.

  Mel glanced at her watch—almost six. She didn’t want to leave. But she had a meeting she couldn’t miss.

  Izzy must have seen her check the time, because her disposition changed immediately. “You have someplace to be?”

  “I have to meet a client.” A client that may change her mind if I don’t lock the deal in now.

  “Then by all means, go.” The attitude was back again.

  Mel let out a heavy sigh and pulled her lips into a solemn smile before pushing out through the door.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Doug bumped Angie with his shoulder. “That girl from class is staring at us.”

  Angie snapped her focus to the blonde who seemed to be studying the two of them intently. “What the hell? She sure is,” she whispered back at Doug. “Whaddaya think’s up with that?”

  “I don’t know, but here she comes.”

  “Hey, Doug.” The blonde looked right past Angie and gave him a smile.

  “Hey.” Doug sat up straight and grinned.

  “Seriously?” Angie hit him in the ribs with her elbow.

  “Ow, that hurt.” His attention snapped back to Angie.

  “Good,” she said before looking at the blonde, who had conveniently slid into the chair adjacent to Doug. “What’s up?”

  “It looks like both our groups are working on restaurant websites. You want to collaborate on a few ideas?”

  Doug smiled real big. “Yeah, su—”

  Seriously. Angie gave him another shot to the ribs. “What kind of restaurant is it?”

  “It’s kind of nouveau Italian.”

  Doug tilted his head toward Angie and said, “That means modern.”

  Angie scowled at him. “I know what it means, Doug.” She turned her attention back to the blonde. “What’s the name of the place?”

  “Gustoso.”

  “That’s—” Angie stomped on his foot this time. “Knock it off, will you,” he squealed.

  “How’d you guys come up with that place?”

  “We couldn’t find a business. So the instructor gave it to us.”

  “It wasn’t on the list she gave us.”

  “Yeah. I know. They were all taken.”

  “Wow.” Angie jammed her papers into her book and slapped it closed. “Are you coming?” she asked Doug as she popped out of her chair.

  The blonde seemed totally baffled. “So do you want to work together?”

  “It’s a competition, remember?” Dumbass. Angie headed across the library.

  “Sorry. We gotta go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow
.” Doug jogged to catch up with Angie, who was already on her way out the door and down the steps to the parking lot. “Hold up, will ya?” He pulled the key from his pocket and hit the unlock button. The car chirped and the lights flashed.

  “What are the fucking odds of that?” She pulled open the car door and tossed her books into the back. “My sister’s gonna flip.”

  Angie rushed into the kitchen and told Izzy how Gustoso’s website had been offered to one of the teams as a project assignment in class.

  “That can’t be true. Mel wouldn’t do something like that.”

  “Call her.” Angie yanked the phone from the wall and handed it to her. “Ask her yourself.”

  Gio chimed in. “What’s that saying you told me, Iz? Nothing worse than a woman screwed?”

  “It’s scorned, smart-ass,” Izzy said, narrowing her eyes. She hung the receiver back on the cradle. “Tony, can you handle the kitchen for a while?”

  “Sure.”

  She took off her chef’s coat and tossed it on the counter before slipping on a chambray shirt over her tank top. No matter what Izzy had done, she’d never thought Mel was the vindictive type. She wouldn’t try to purposely hurt Izzy’s business. There had to be some sort of explanation.

  Izzy blew by the receptionist and pushed open the door to Mel’s office.

  “Hi,” Mel said, popping up out of the chair behind her desk. She seemed surprised to see her.

  The receptionist followed her in. “I’m sorry. She wouldn’t stop.”

  “It’s okay.” She rounded her desk. “Do you want to sit down?” Her emerald-green eyes sparkled as she motioned toward the club chairs in the corner of her office.

  “No thanks. I’ll stand.”

  “Okay.” Mel leaned back against her desk, planting a hand on either side. “This is a coincidence. I was going to come see you this evening.”

  “Oh? What about?”

  “I need to talk to you about Gustoso.”

  Izzy held back, waiting to see what Mel had to say. “Go on.”

  “That’s where I went the other night when I left the hospital.”

  “So it’s true.” She watched Mel’s mouth drop open, then close again. “Angie told me you have one of the groups in her class working on a website for them.”

  Mel’s forehead puckered as she shifted her weight. “Yes. But—”

  “Is Gustoso one of your clients?” She pushed forward.

  “I guess you could say that.”

  “Did you know about it?” She tried to tamp down her anger, but it was getting more difficult by the minute.

  “Not until after it was assigned to the group. Nancy chose the clients for the class.”

  “What the hell, Mel? That’s Dana’s place.” The words came out louder than Izzy intended, and Mel’s face hardened.

  Her eyes had turned cool green. “You never told me the name of the restaurant, and you said it wasn’t Italian.”

  “That’s not the point. Why would you create a website for a restaurant that could pull my business?”

  “I can’t turn away every restaurant because they might be your competition.”

  “Why not?”

  “That’s bad business, Izzy.”

  “And you care more about your business than you care about me.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “Apparently it is, or you wouldn’t have taken Gustoso on as a client.” Mel didn’t respond but pinched her lips together. “Wow.” Izzy rubbed her forehead. “I know I hurt you, Mel. But I didn’t think you’d be so bitter.”

  “Angie’s designing a wonderful website for Bella’s.” She moved toward Izzy, who backed away. “The site the other team is creating will never compare.”

  “But it will when you’re done with it.”

  “Izzy, Gustoso isn’t your competition. I—”

  Izzy put up a hand. “Any restaurant is my competition.”

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  “It is what it is.” She shrugged. “It looks like neither one of us is innocent in this mess.” She pulled open the door and took off.

  *

  Mel listed the details on the whiteboard as she and Nancy brainstormed ad ideas for the new hardware-store contract they’d acquired. Business had been booming, and she was thankful she’d decided to bring Nancy on as her partner.

  The phone rang, and Mel reached across her desk and picked it up. “This is Mel.” She leaned back against her desk.

  “Hi, honey.”

  “Hi, Dad. What’s up?”

  “It’s your mother, dear. She’s had a heart attack.”

  Adrenaline rushed through her, and she shot to her feet. “Is she okay?” She held her hand to her stomach.

  “I’m afraid not. It happened some time during the night. When I tried to wake her, she was already gone.”

  She let the phone slide from her hand and dropped to her knees. No. No. Not her.

  “Mel? What is it?” Nancy picked up the phone, and Mel could vaguely hear only her side of the conversation.

  “Hello, Mr. Collins. It’s Nancy.”

  “Oh my God. I’m so sorry.”

  “Is there anything I can do?”

  “Yes. I’ll take care of her.”

  Mel sat, crumpled to the ground in a zombie-like state. She’d just spoken to her mother on the phone yesterday. “I was supposed to have dinner with her last night, but she said she was feeling flu-ish and went to bed early. I should’ve checked on her.”

  “Honey.” Nancy put her arm around her shoulder. “The doctor said it was a massive coronary during her sleep. You couldn’t have done anything.”

  “But if I’d checked on her, maybe I might have seen something.”

  “No, honey. You wouldn’t have. Your dad was in the same bed with her and didn’t even know.”

  “I need to see him.”

  “Okay. I’ll take you.”

  *

  Mel touched the end button on her cell phone and set it on the table. It immediately rang again. She picked it up but didn’t answer it. She just couldn’t do it anymore.

  Nancy took it from her hand. “Hello.”

  “No, she’s lying down.”

  “I’ll let her know.” She touched the red button and disconnected the call. “That was Rick.” She slid the phone back onto the table. “He wasn’t very happy when I wouldn’t let him talk to you.”

  “Thanks. I really didn’t need to deal with him right now. He’s been in real mega-prick mode lately.”

  Nancy gawked at her like she was startled by the foul comment coming out of Mel’s usually proper mouth.

  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be that way.”

  Nancy pulled her lips up slightly. “No, you’re spot-on. He is a prick.”

  Mel let out a laugh, which quickly turned into a gurgling sob. Nancy wrapped her arms around her, holding her closely. Mel dreaded the days to come. When this part of the ritual was over, she would be the one to make the arrangements. She was stronger, more responsible than her brother Mike.

  She dried her eyes and sat in the living-room chair silently while her dad told her how he’d rolled over to wake her mother and she wouldn’t stir. How he’d called 911 and when the paramedics arrived they hadn’t even tried to administer CPR. How she’d looked so peaceful, like she hadn’t felt the slightest twinge of pain. How he’d wanted them to leave her there long enough for Mel and Michael to come say good-bye, but they wouldn’t.

  She watched her father, his head cradled in his hands. How would he survive without her? Who would take care of him now? He certainly wouldn’t let her; that would show weakness. She watched Mike as he sat beside him and knew he would tend to him for the time being. At least until her father reached a place where he could accept her for the daughter she was, not the daughter he wanted her to be. Mike was the golden boy. He could do no wrong in her father’s eyes. While her father ignored all of Mike’s imperfections, he always spotted Mel’s. She’d never b
een able to live up to his expectations.

  Her mind wandered to the day she’d come home from college so excited to tell him how well she’d done that term. During dinner she’d told him she ranked third in her graduating class. He’d looked up from his plate just long enough to ask who the other two students were. She remembered the sting like it was yesterday. Even though she owned her own business and made a very good living, he had an innate way of making her feel inadequate.

  She popped up off the couch and moved toward the terrace doors but stopped at her mother’s chair and picked up the plaid throw she’d often used to keep her legs warm. She held it to her nose, warming herself with her mother’s familiar scent before wrapping it around her shoulders. She couldn’t take any more of this. She needed some air.

  Nancy followed Mel out, keeping a close watch on her. Mel was sure Nancy thought she was going to lose it any minute. She was numb. Her mother was her rock, her source of strength when things got tough. She had no idea how she was going to live without her.

  *

  “Bella’s,” Angie said as she picked up the phone and pressed it to her ear. “She can’t come to the phone right now. Can I help you with something?” There was a moment of silence. “Just a minute.” Izzy craned her neck to see Angie wave the receiver at her. “It’s Mel’s friend, Nancy. She says it’s important.”

  “Get her number and tell her I’ll call her back.”

  She put the receiver back to her ear, and her expression told Izzy something was wrong. She pulled it from her ear and covered the mouthpiece. “Mel’s mom died.”

  “What?”

  “Her mom…she had a heart attack and died this morning.”

  Izzy left what she was cooking on the stove and took the phone from Angie’s hand. “Where is she?”

  “I don’t know,” Nancy said. “I checked her office, my place, and a couple other places I thought she might be, but I can’t find her. I hoped maybe she’d come to see you.”

  “She hasn’t been here.”

  “I’m worried about her, Izzy. She’s acting strange. Like nothing happened.”

  A rush of panic swept through her. “I’ll call you back.” She spun around and took off out the back door. She could think of only one other place Mel could be. She sped down the highway pushing eighty, ignoring the horns as she weaved in and out of traffic. Izzy would never forgive herself if anything happened to Mel.