The Girl He Used to Love

by Amy Vastine

  “Let me check it out and I’ll get back to you. I’m not sure he’s ready to pursue this right now. The more time I spend with him, the more I see he might have too much on his plate. I will get back to you, I promise.”

  “He’s not ready? You said this was the one. What’s changed?”

  Everything had changed. He had finally made amends with Faith. That would be ruined if he offered Sawyer an out. How would she ever run Helping Hooves by herself? There was no way.

  “Nothing. I’m in the middle of brunch with my family. Let me go online and see what’s happened this weekend and I’ll get back to you. Relax.”

  “Relax? This company needs more than Piper for it to survive. You are in charge of finding the talent. You told me you found talent. Sign the talent.”

  Dean felt sick to his stomach. Grace Note needed Sawyer just as much as Helping Hooves. If what Landon was saying was true and Piper’s fans were taking a liking to him, he absolutely was the answer to their troubles.

  “I’ll call you back.” Dean hung up, but needed a minute before returning to the kitchen where they were still laughing and sharing memories.

  Once Sawyer began making music, there wouldn’t be time to work on the farm. He’d be traveling and touring. He’d be up late, and mornings on the farm were much too early for a music star. There wouldn’t be a compromise. They couldn’t share him.

  Dean sat down on the couch and rubbed his face. All the weight that had been lifted off his shoulders this morning was quickly replaced by this burden.

  “Everything okay?” Faith took a cautious step into the room.

  Just the sight of her made him feel better. And worse.

  “I’m fine. Work,” he deflected. “You know how that is.”

  She sat beside him and ran a hand up and down his back. Her touch was so familiar. It felt more like home than this house did.

  “It never ends, right? I wish I could help the way you helped us.”

  She could help. Give me Sawyer, he wanted to say. It would make things so much easier if she let him go than if Dean had to take him away.

  “You’re sweet to offer, though.” He put his hand on her knee. “I don’t want to think about work right now. I’m having too much fun laughing at you.”

  She playfully pinched the back of his neck. “Nice.”

  “How does someone who’s now an amazing baker make the ugliest cake-fail ever?”

  Faith shrugged. “I blame Addison, one hundred percent.”

  “That I do believe. She was a menace in the kitchen. Somehow that girl could create a sink full of dishes and dirty every surface by pouring a bowl of cereal. She was so messy.”

  “It’s nice to see you talk about her without getting that look on your face.”

  “What look?”

  Faith traced the line of his jaw with her finger. “This would get really tight and kind of pulse. And your eyes would narrow into angry slits. And this spot—” she ran her finger between his eyes “—would wrinkle up.”

  “That doesn’t sound very attractive.”

  “I’ll admit, it made you look mean. And it made me sad,” Faith said, running her finger down his nose and onto his lips. He gave it a kiss.

  “I don’t want to make you sad anymore.”

  Her finger was quickly replaced by her lips. “Good, because you make my heart happy when you smile. You smile more when you talk about her. It’s my favorite.”

  “You were right about needing to tough it out and get through the sad stuff. It wasn’t easy, but it wasn’t as impossible as I thought it would be.” Dean had been so afraid of unleashing the sorrow. The anger had been safer somehow. It made him feel in control even though he was far from it. “It almost felt good to cry about it. I held all that in for so long, I wasn’t sure what would happen if I loosened my grip. But this morning I let it go and it was exactly what I needed.”

  She took hold of his hand and kissed it. Dean quickly realized how much he had missed kissing her. He felt twenty years old again, when everything was right with the world...when he held her in his arms and kissed her until their lips were sore. If only kissing her now would solve all their problems.

  “I’m still trying to wrap my head around how different everything is. A week ago I was sure you would never want anything to do with me. I thought we were destined to be strangers.”

  “A week ago, at the picnic, I wanted to kiss you after we danced. So it’s not all that different for me.”

  Faith’s cheeks turned red as she bit down on her bottom lip. She turned her head, embarrassed. “We should go finish brunch before our families wonder what we’re doing out here.”

  That was probably for the best. Dean had used up all his self-control when it came to Faith a long time ago.

  * * *

  DEAN WALKED THE Strattons to their truck when brunch and the friendly socializing came to an end. He made sure Faith got in the truck and resisted making a fool of himself in front of Sawyer. No kiss goodbye, just a promise to talk soon.

  He was climbing the porch steps when Sawyer called his name. He jogged up behind him. “I didn’t want to say anything in front of my sister, but is this normal?”

  He handed Dean his phone. Sawyer’s Instagram account had thousands of followers that hadn’t been there a few days ago.

  “I keep getting notifications that all these people like the photos Lily made me take. I have my phone on vibrate and it’s been shaking all day. Tell me that’s what we wanted to happen.”

  It was exactly what Dean had wanted a few days ago. Piper’s fans were falling in love with Sawyer just as Dean had predicted. Only, he hadn’t thought it would happen so soon.

  “It’s good,” Dean replied, trying not to make too much of it. He didn’t want to get Sawyer excited about something he might no longer be able to offer him. “We’ll have to see if it keeps up. You might want to turn off the notifications.”

  “Maybe I’m blowing up,” Sawyer said with a hopeful grin.

  “Maybe.”

  Faith waved from the passenger seat as Sawyer ran back to the truck. Dean lifted his hand and tried to keep his expression neutral. He didn’t want her to worry before she needed to do so.

  Once Dean got inside the house, he went straight for his dad’s home office. He sat down at the computer and pulled up everything he had set up for Sawyer. Everything he had wanted to prove to Landon was right there. Piper had helped launch him into the stratosphere.

  “What’s going on?” his dad said, poking his head in the room.

  “Checking some things for work. Do you mind if I use your computer?”

  “Fine by me.” His dad sat down on the small leather couch in the corner. “It was nice to spend time with old friends today.”

  He was baiting Dean into a conversation about Faith. Dean wasn’t sure he could talk about it given the current situation. “It was very nice.”

  “I take it you and Faith have made amends. You two seemed...happy to be around each other.”

  “We didn’t know about Addison and Aaron until Mom told me this morning. It made a big difference. We’ve been blaming ourselves this entire time.”

  “Goodness, you and your mother are exactly the same. Except she wouldn’t do work on a Sunday. What’s so important that you have to worry about work on this beautiful day?”

  Impressing his father had always been a goal of Dean’s. He wanted his father to be proud of him and aware only of his success. He didn’t bother sharing information about his trouble.

  “Just checking on a few things. Music happens 24/7. We don’t take a day off.”

  “Something changed after that phone call you got in the middle of brunch. You sure nothing’s wrong?”

  His dad’s probing wasn’t going to end. Dean had to give hi
m something. “We’re on the lookout for some new talent. There’s been some issues with Boone. Landon’s worried, but I know we’ll get it figured out.”

  “Hence why you were down in Birmingham last weekend. Looking for the next big thing, huh?”

  “I’ll find him.”

  “Him? How do you know it’s going to be a him? Maybe the next big thing is a woman,” his dad challenged.

  Dean’s gaze fell back on the computer screen and Sawyer’s smiling face, which now had ten thousand likes. Where would he find another guy like this?

  “I have a really good lead. And it’s a guy.”

  “Really? You’ve been trapped here since you left Birmingham. Where’d you find this someone?” His dad sat up a little straighter. “Wait...are you thinking about signing Sawyer?”

  There weren’t a lot of other country singers in Grass Lake. It was amazing it had taken his dad this long to figure it out.

  “Sawyer is very talented, but he also has a lot of responsibilities at the farm.”

  “Well, what’s he want?” His dad waited patiently for Dean’s answer. But Dean hadn’t been thinking about what Sawyer wanted. His focus had been on what Faith needed.

  “I think I have to talk to him some more. Make sure he’s ready to make a commitment to something that could really change his life.”

  Dean’s dad rose and hitched up his pants. “His life and Faith’s.” He blew out a breath. “That will be interesting.”

  It would.

  * * *

  “WHAT ARE YOU smiling about over there?” Sawyer asked as Faith stared out the passenger window, admiring the wildflowers that were blooming along the roadside.

  “It’s been a really good day, that’s all.”

  “You seemed ready to kill someone when you first came into church. Then you left and came back like life was beautiful. And I think you and Dean ran off to make out in the middle of brunch, but I guess I should be glad he didn’t jump across the table and kiss you in front of all of us because he sure looked like he wanted to.”

  Faith pressed a hand to her warming cheek. She closed her eyes and took a breath. It had been so long since she’d felt so free. No guilt, no worry, no heartbreak. It didn’t seem possible and she didn’t want this freedom to be taken away.

  “Remember when you told me Addison’s death wasn’t my fault?”

  “Yeah,” Sawyer said, glancing over at her.

  “I believe it now.”

  Sawyer grinned and nodded. “It’s about time.”

  “And I think maybe I want to be more than friends with Dean.” She waited for a smart or teasing remark but none came. His smile had faded. She nudged him with her elbow. “What? No comment on that one?”

  Sawyer inhaled and exhaled loudly. “I feel like we should talk about something.”

  Faith turned back to the window. “No way, little brother. Do not try to pretend to be Dad having The Talk with me. That was excruciating enough the first time. I do not want to relive that even as a joke.”

  Sawyer turned into the drive that led to the farm. “I wasn’t talking about that. It’s about me and Dean.”

  Faith gave him a good smack on the arm. “That is not funny.”

  “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m trying to be serious here. I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a couple days, but there was never a good time, and I almost hate to do it now because you’re in a good mood.”

  “What are you talking about?” Faith asked as he pulled the truck up by the house.

  Sawyer ran a hand through his hair and scratched the back of his neck. “Dean and I made a deal.”

  The deal. Faith knew there was a deal. She’d let it go because, deep down, she was worried it was going to take away the little bit of happiness she had going on. Now it threatened to ruin the big happy she’d been given today.

  “What kind of deal?”

  Sawyer kept his eyes forward. “I asked him to help us get the farm ready for our inspection in exchange for letting him experiment with my stuff online.”

  Faith had thought for sure he was going to say he planned to go to Nashville even though he had promised her he would stay here. This seemed much less worrisome, except it didn’t make a whole lot of sense. “What does that mean?”

  “We set up some profiles on some social media sites and Dean stirred up some interest. I guess his partner wasn’t as gung ho about signing a complete unknown as Dean was, so this was supposed to help Dean prove to his partner that I was worth the risk.”

  “But you aren’t going to Nashville, so it doesn’t really matter, right?” She waited for Sawyer to agree, but he didn’t. He didn’t say anything at all. “We passed inspection. We’re going to be listed as a NETA-accredited facility. We’re probably going to have to hire some staff. There’s a lot of work to do.”

  Sawyer’s grip on the steering wheel turned his knuckles white. “You’re right. We’re going to need some more staff. We can hire someone or get volunteers to help you in the mornings with the horses. You can hire a maintenance person. The things I do around here don’t have to be done by me.”

  Faith’s whole body was trembling. This could not be happening. “Yes, they do.”

  Sawyer parked and faced his sister. His eyes locked on hers in a way that silenced her completely. “No, they don’t.”

  “What happens when this music thing doesn’t pan out and you have to come home and I have to fire some poor guy because you decided to play country star for a couple months?”

  “Wow. Thanks for the vote of confidence there, sis.” Sawyer pushed open his door and jumped out of the truck.

  Faith scrambled to catch up with him as he stormed toward the house. “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m trying to be realistic. How many talented people end up singing in dive bars their whole lives? A lot. Becoming a famous singer is like becoming an NFL star. Very few people make it to that level. It’s just a fact, not a put-down.”

  Sawyer stopped and spun around. His face was as red as the tie around his neck that he’d loosened on the ride home. “Dean thinks I have what it takes and he’s in the business. His opinion matters a whole lot more than yours.”

  He headed into the house without another word, leaving Faith at the bottom of the porch steps. She tried to come up with another argument for keeping him in Grass Lake. She considered bribery and guilt trips that included using their father’s wishes for both kids to run the farm when he was gone. She did her best to think of a way to change Sawyer’s mind. That was when it came to her. Maybe it wasn’t Sawyer’s mind that needed to be changed.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  DEAN’S MOTHER HAD had enough. “How long you gonna stare at your phone like that? Doesn’t it make you go cross-eyed after a while?”

  Dean had watched Sawyer’s popularity increase by the hundreds every hour today. By ten o’clock in the evening, he had more followers on Instagram and Twitter than some of Dean’s currently signed acts.

  Sawyer had been feeding his fans new pictures and videos all day. Shots of him and his dog. A picture of his guitar. A video of him singing on his bed—shirtless. The boy suddenly had it all figured out and he was working it all over the internet.

  Landon had been right about it being possible that he could attract the wrong kind of attention, aka the competition. Even if Dean backed off, he’d already got the ball rolling for Sawyer in a big way. Other record labels could come a-knocking.

  “Sorry, Mom, but some of us have to work no matter what time or day it is. Plus, I think I’ve seen this one. The husband killed her.”

  The family was all gathered around the television to watch some police drama. It was Dean’s mother’s guilty pleasure.

  His dad turned the volume up a click. “It’s always the husband. And if he’s the victim
, it’s always the wife. What does that say about our society, huh?”

  “Marriage makes you homicidal?” his mother guessed.

  Dean laughed. His parents were more entertaining than the show. “I hope that’s not true. I don’t want to have to visit one of you in jail.”

  “It would be your mother doing to the killing. I am much more tolerant of her quirks than she is of mine.”

  “What? That’s not true.” Marilee perked up from her spot on the couch. “I don’t have any quirks.”

  Dean turned his attention back to his phone. At the rate he was going, Sawyer was going to have an agent within a few days and then his price would go up.

  Faith sent a text. Can I come over?

  Dean smiled. When he wasn’t thinking about what he was supposed to do about her brother, he was thinking about her.

  Always, he replied and got up to wait for her outside.

  “Where are you going?” his mom asked.

  “Gotta talk to a girl and make sure she’s not the kind that’ll kill me if we get married someday.”

  “Good luck with that. The odds are apparently not in your favor, son,” his dad said without looking away from the television.

  Dean sat on the old porch swing his dad had installed but rarely used. He hoped Faith was coming over to spend time with him, but something told him she needed to talk, most likely about Sawyer.

  Faith pulled in a few minutes later. Her little blue sedan wasn’t much newer than Dean’s rental car.

  He got up and moved to the railing. “You must have known I was thinking about you all day,” he said as she got out of the car.

  Faith didn’t smile like the way he had hoped. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she was dressed in what appeared to be makeshift pajamas.

  “I’m sorry about coming over so late. I had to wait until Sawyer went to bed.”

  “I thought we were done with having to sneak out of the house to see one another,” he said, hoping for that smile but not getting it. “What’s the matter?”

  Faith joined him on the porch. “I need to talk to you.”