The Girl He Used to Love

by Amy Vastine

  “Perfect. You guys are lifesavers. Sawyer’s been gone less than a week and I’m already sleeping on the job. We’ll be out of business in no time!”

  “Don’t say that,” Josie said with a stern look. “It’s a transition. You’re doing fine. I have a present for you.”

  Faith watched her with a furrowed brow as she pulled out a wrapped package from her purse. She couldn’t imagine what Josie had up her sleeve.

  “Why are you buying me presents? I’m trying really hard not to throw myself a pity party and gifts are never required at those, anyway.”

  “This is from your community, which wants to step up to help you keep this place running.” Josie handed her the gift.

  Carefully, Faith unwrapped the package, wondering what the community could do for her that would fit inside a...notebook. Faith opened it up to find a list of names, phone numbers and days of the week they were available.

  “That is your complete list of everyone who wants to volunteer at Helping Hooves,” Josie explained. “Some of them are kids from the high school who need the service hours, but most are the people in this community who have relied on you for a variety of things and want to repay you the kindness.”

  Given the amount of people willing to help, there would be no need to hire someone to do Sawyer’s work. Faith could save her money to pay more therapists. She could update some of the facilities.

  A bunch of Lily’s friends had offered a few hours a week this summer to help at the camp. A couple of the retired guys who loved to hang out at the Sundown were ready and willing to take care of mowing and running the heavy equipment. A few ladies from town promised two or three hours a week to pitch in with the clerical work that Faith often felt burdened with doing. Mrs. Ortiz, who worked at the hospital in Claims Processing, was willing to assist with all of Helping Hooves’s insurance woes.

  Josie was all too pleased with herself. “You’ve got people committed and signed up through the summer. If you look, we started a calendar on the next couple pages.”

  Faith wanted to cry. No one had ever done something this huge for her before. She hugged her friend, finding words hard to come by at the moment. Maybe Helping Hooves would make it, after all. Even without Sawyer.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  “MR. PRESLEY, IT’S DWIGHT. I’ve got some good news. Your car is all done and ready to roll.” Dean hit Save Message on his phone. Thank goodness his car was fixed. One less thing to worry about. And a legitimate reason to go back to Grass Lake.

  “Sawyer, let’s do it again. This time, relax and let the words come a little slower.” Jimmy Young was one of the record producers Dean admired most. He had the best ear and the patience of a saint. Jimmy had produced both of Piper’s albums. “You’re rushing for some reason. You can do this, buddy.”

  Dean watched Sawyer nod from inside the sound booth. They’d been working on this song for a couple hours and Sawyer wasn’t feeling it.

  “Actually, can we take five instead?” Sawyer asked.

  Jimmy looked to Dean, who was footing the bill for the studio time. It wasn’t cheap, especially on the weekend. Lately, Grace Note barely had enough money to book any studio time. They had to be so cautious, and hopefully Sawyer was worth it. In a perfect world Dean would have his own recording studio that would help pay the bills, not create more. But in Nashville, quality space was at a premium.

  “If he can’t do it without a break, let’s take a break.”

  Jimmy let Sawyer know he had ten minutes to get himself together. Sawyer stepped out of the booth and Dean followed him down the hall, where there was a small break room set up.

  “Everything okay?” Dean asked as Sawyer scrolled through his phone. He couldn’t figure out where this particular mental block was coming from. Up until now, Sawyer had been nothing but professional.

  “I’m fine,” Sawyer said distractedly.

  “Is there something you’d rather be doing right now than recording this song?”

  They had a clear plan with a tight timeline. Record the single, get a video out, record the album, get on a tour, single, tour, single. None of it could happen without the first track getting laid.

  Sawyer shoved his phone back in his pocket. “I’m not allowed to talk to you about it.”

  “You can talk to me about anything,” he assured him.

  “Not this particular person,” Sawyer replied, shaking his head.

  Dean’s chest constricted. He’d been worrying about Faith for three weeks now. He’d thought about texting her but had decided against it. His sole source of information was his mother, who could only report she’d seen Faith looking lovely at church on Sunday. He needed a new spy.

  “What’s wrong with Faith?”

  Sawyer sighed. “I don’t know. Nothing. She never answers any of my calls. I text her and she texts back a word or two. I know she’s busy, but is she really so busy that she can’t check in with me?”

  Dean also worried about her overdoing it. She was much better at saying no now, but old habits died hard. She could still be overextending herself and not maintaining a good balance. The difference between Dean and Sawyer was that Dean wasn’t letting his concern interfere with his work.

  “You’re homesick, is that it?”

  Sawyer shrugged. “I can’t even remember the last time I went this long without talking to my sister. I don’t like it.”

  Dean had no solution to this problem. He understood; there were plenty of times he wished he could talk to his sister, as well. Faith was alive and hopefully well. Sawyer might have to be happy simply knowing that.

  “This isn’t going to be an easy transition. The busier you get, the less time you’re going to have to connect with the people back home. Lots of musicians get homesick, but you have to do your job or else you won’t have to miss home—you’ll be back there permanently.”

  Sawyer frowned. There wasn’t a way to sugarcoat it for him, and Dean didn’t have the time or the money to waste if there was.

  “I’ll do better,” he promised.

  “My car’s fixed. Got a call from Dwight just a little bit ago. If you get this done, maybe I’ll take you with me when I go to pick it up.”

  Twenty minutes later the vocals were finished and the mixing could begin. Dean and Sawyer celebrated with some tacos back at Dean’s condo. Sawyer’s stuff was scattered around and never seemed to stay confined to the bedroom Dean was letting him use. The boy had no money to get an apartment or to pay for a hotel. The only person he really knew in Nashville was Dean. It seemed only fair to put a roof over his head...temporarily.

  Dean set the box of tacos on the coffee table and went to grab some napkins. Sawyer turned on the television and found the hockey game. The Predators were playing well and had a good shot at making the playoffs. Sawyer made himself comfortable on Dean’s leather couch and started unwrapping his first taco. “Do you have any hot sauce?”

  Dean was a man living in Nashville. Of course he had hot sauce. He didn’t have bread or anything close to a fruit or a vegetable, but he had four bottles of hot sauce in the cabinet.

  “Do you think you could keep your dirty clothes in your room?” Dean picked up a T-shirt he was certain he’d seen Sawyer wearing two days ago.

  Sawyer snatched it from his hand. “Sorry. Faith used to complain I was a slob. But I’d leave dirty clothes lying around and they’d magically appear in my drawer clean and folded a few days later. Don’t blame me. She didn’t train me very well.”

  Laundry fairy. Man, Dean missed her.

  “Yeah, well, that isn’t going to happen here. So you’re going to have to learn to pick this stuff up. The only place I’m going to put it is in the garbage.”

  Sawyer grunted as he shoved half a taco into his mouth. Dean took that as a “yes, sir.”

 
“Why don’t you try to call your sister?” Dean sort of hoped she’d want to talk to him if she heard he was watching over her brother.

  Sawyer checked his phone. “She’s probably in the barn doing the evening chores. This is what happens—when I have downtime, she’s busy or asleep, and when she’s free, I’m not.”

  “Well, you have nothing going on tonight. Set a timer or something so you remember to call her before she goes to bed.”

  Sawyer put his taco down. “Why are you so eager for me to call her? You hoping she’s going to ask about you?”

  “No,” Dean said in a huff.

  Sawyer grinned annoyingly. “Yes, you are. You want me to put in a good word for you?” His smile slipped. “If she’ll even answer my call.”

  “I thought we agreed we weren’t going to talk about her. You promised.”

  “You’re the one who keeps bringing her up,” Sawyer accused.

  “Well, I’m done.”

  “Oh, so we can talk about her when you want to, but I’m not allowed to acknowledge her existence otherwise. Real fair.”

  Dean ignored him and focused on the hockey game instead. Nothing about Faith was fair. It wasn’t fair that she had to run the farm alone. It wasn’t fair that she’d asked him to lie. It wasn’t fair that she couldn’t see it wasn’t Dean’s fault that Sawyer had chosen to come to Nashville. Dean hadn’t asked him to come, but he had allowed him to stay. Not that Dean had any idea how she felt about the whole situation.

  Dean’s phone rang and Kevin’s name appeared. Boone’s agent had better have a really good reason to call on a Saturday. He tried not to get his hopes up, but he really wanted this to be the news he’d been waiting for.

  “Kev, what’s up?”

  Dean said a silent prayer that he was about to say Boone would go to California and work with Piper.

  That wasn’t exactly why Kevin was on the phone. “He isn’t going to go. I’ve tried everything. I even threatened to quit and he said he’d save me the trouble and fired me.”

  The headache Dean had been fighting off all day quickly returned. “He fired you?”

  “He’ll hire me back by tomorrow. This is how he handles things lately. I’m not sure I’ll accept his offer, though. Part of me is as done as he is.”

  Boone needed an agent and the publicist who, as rumor had it, had been fired twice already.

  “I’ve been patient,” Dean reminded him. “I’ve been more patient than most labels would be.”

  “I’m fairly certain if he was with anyone else, he’d be out. I’m sure under all his nastiness is someone who’s grateful for that patience.”

  “What’s his excuse this time? And it better be good because I am about to make going to this place nonnegotiable.”

  “Too far. He doesn’t want to leave Tennessee.”

  Dean had promised to look for a facility closer to home and hadn’t done it. He wasn’t even sure they existed around this part of the country. Places like that were very west coast.

  “I’m going to find him something here in Tennessee and I won’t listen to any excuses. He’ll go or we’re going to terminate the contract.”

  “I’ll pass that on. Not sure it’s going to get me rehired, but I’m also not sure if I care at this point.”

  “Good luck,” Dean said before hanging up.

  Sawyer stood and picked up every stray piece of clothing in the room, tossing it all into the spare bedroom. He closed the door to his room before sitting back down.

  “What got into you?” Dean asked.

  “I forget you’re my boss now. I better start behaving or else.” Sawyer drew an imaginary line with his thumb across his throat.

  “You’re lucky I like you better than others.”

  The sad thing was, he had really liked Boone in the beginning. There was a time when he used to be someone Dean respected. The first time he’d met the man, Dean had been truly starstruck.

  “You’re not really going to drop him, are you?” Sawyer unwrapped another taco. “I mean, he’s Boone Williams.”

  “He needs help. I need to find a facility that will take him. Somewhere they’ll help him work on his issues without him realizing that’s what they’re doing. You know any place like that?”

  “What’s he supposed to think he’s doing there?”

  “Recharging his batteries. Getting away from the pressures of Nashville.”

  Sawyer didn’t have any good ideas. Just as Dean suspected, places like that didn’t exist around here. Dean went back to watching the hockey game.

  At the beginning of the third period, Sawyer’s phone rang and both men exchanged a hopeful look. Sawyer held it up and showed Dean the photo of Faith.

  “Hey,” he said. “I’m glad you called.”

  So was Dean. He didn’t want to be creepy, but he considered asking Sawyer to put her on speaker phone so he could hear her voice, too.

  Brother and sister caught up. Dean listened to Sawyer tell her about recording in the studio. He couldn’t be sure if Sawyer was oversharing every detail or if she was asking him for it. When it was her turn to talk, Dean had to decipher what she was saying by how Sawyer replied.

  “Seriously? How many people signed up to help? Wow, that’s impressive.”

  Dean couldn’t figure out what that was about. He got up and tried to make himself look busy and not like the eavesdropper he was. He threw away some garbage and flipped through the pile of mail that had arrived today.

  “Sounds like you aren’t missing me at all.” She must have said that wasn’t true because Sawyer smiled. “I feel bad saying good. But good.”

  They talked about the horses and Sawyer made sure Faith was keeping an eye on the bump on Sassy’s hind leg. He seemed satisfied with her answer.

  “I miss your cooking and your laundry talents, that’s for sure.” Sawyer got up and walked to his bedroom, where Dean couldn’t hear him as well. “I miss Scout and the horses, but most of all I miss you, Faith. I miss talking about the day and planning for the next one. I miss hearing what you think. I miss laughing with you and at you. No, really. I miss home. This isn’t as easy as I thought it was going to be.”

  Sawyer wasn’t the only one who missed her. Dean missed her laugh and the way she bit her lip when she was embarrassed. He missed how soft her cheeks were and how it felt to kiss her there. He missed kissing her, period.

  Sawyer came back out. “Well, Dean really wants to talk to you. Do you have another minute?” Dean shook his head but it did not deter Sawyer one bit. “He’s right here. He’s been waiting to hear from you...just talk to him for a second. Here he is.”

  Sawyer held out the phone but Dean couldn’t bring himself to take it. What could he even say that would not make him sound like an idiot?

  “Just talk to her,” Sawyer whispered.

  He was going to find out.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, there,” she replied. Her voice sounded so small, so far away. He wanted her to come closer.

  “How are you?”

  “Good. How are you?” she asked.

  Better now that he could hear her. “Good. Your brother is keeping me busy.”

  Faith was quiet. Maybe she didn’t want to hear about them working together. She finally said, “That’s good.”

  The awkwardness of this conversation was making Dean’s blood pressure rise. There were so many things he wanted to say but couldn’t. Shouldn’t.

  “You hanging in there? Things aren’t too busy, are they?”

  “I’m doing my best, and this town is full of some really great people.” She went on to tell him about how Josie had organized a couple dozen or so volunteers to help her keep Helping Hooves up and running in Sawyer’s absence.

  “I’m not nearly as busy a
s I was a month ago. I’ve got people here doing most of the work. I’ve focused on training them and finding some new therapists. I think I found a social worker who’s willing to work here part-time.”

  “Sounds like getting rid of your brother might have been the best thing to happen to you.”

  Sawyer balled up a napkin and threw it at Dean’s head.

  “All the volunteers make the workday much easier, but at night, it’s just me and Scout. I think I need to get a roommate.”

  “Trust me. Roommates are definitely overrated.” He threw the napkin back at Sawyer, who batted it away.

  “Take care of him, okay? He might be a pain in the butt, but he’s important to me.”

  She was as protective of him as ever. She had accepted his choice to leave her behind and still wanted the best for him. That was a good step.

  “I know he is. I will do my best.”

  He handed the phone back to Sawyer and let them say their goodbyes. Grass Lake was an impressive community. It was amazing that the whole town had rallied around Faith. That kind of cooperation didn’t exist in a lot of places.

  The two men went back to watching the hockey game and finished off all twelve tacos. Dean’s mind kept wandering back to Faith. He hated thinking about her in that big farmhouse all by herself. If she got lonely enough, there was no telling what she might do. He imagined her on a date with Charles Hackney and almost threw up his entire dinner.

  “You know, if Boone Williams spent a couple weeks on the farm, Faith could whip him into shape in no time. Can you believe she’s overseeing all those volunteers? She gets to be bossy for hours on end—I can’t imagine.”

  Dean sat up a little straighter. “What did you say?”

  “My sister is probably loving every minute of bossing those volunteers around. Remember how she was with you?”

  “No, no. The part about Boone.”

  Sawyer kicked his feet up on the coffee table. “I just said a couple weeks on the farm would be plenty of time for Faith to help that guy get his act together. Have him take care of the horses, think about someone other than himself for once. All that fresh air and hard work would definitely get him out of his head.”