Being Human

by Patricia Lynne

  I followed her gaze, noticing a group forming. Mini flame-throwers were out and one human even had a tire iron. The group watched me, waiting for me to make a move. I quickly wiped the anger off my face and took a step back. “Not your fault. Thank you for helping. No, I didn't get the address. The old human fell asleep and I couldn't wake her.” I paused. “I'll go back and maybe she won’t fall asleep so I can ask.”

  “She probably fainted.”

  “Why would she do that?”

  The human looked at me curiously, some of her fear melting. She was careful to avert her gaze from mine when I looked back. “You really have no idea?”

  “No,” I said. “I wasn't going to kill her. I told her I'd only do it if she was going to die because that would be a waste of blood.”

  She laughed nervously. “Wouldn’t that make you faint?”

  “No.” I glanced up at the sky, then the mob and back to the human. “Thank you for trying to help... have a good day?” I wasn't sure about the last part, but I threw it in to make sure I sounded harmless. If I wanted to harm her, I wouldn't say that, right?

  “You too... I guess,” she replied.

  The mob surrounded her as I walked away, asking her if she was okay, if she wanted to sit or needed something to drink. I rolled my eyes. Humans were paranoid. If I wanted her blood, I wouldn't have wasted time talking to her; I would have bit her neck and enjoyed myself. Who wants to talk while they eat anyways?

  ****

  I couldn't find my brother all week. All week! I rested close to the cabin and as soon as the sun set, I rushed to it. When I didn't find him there, I went to our home. I had to be careful when I did that. The old human I apparently scared had raised the alarm. The humans were looking for me, looking to destroy me before I killed again.

  How else was I going to get fresh blood?

  Not that I hunted while looking for my brother. He was more important than the hunger gnawing at me. I knew I'd have to take time off from the search one night to sate myself. I kept pushing it back, hoping each night would be the night I found him.

  I knocked on the door, feeling the wood buckle with each blow. “I just want to know where my brother is. I won't kill you. Promise. You don't even have to open the door.”

  “Demon be gone!” the voice on the other side commanded.

  “What? I just want to know where–”

  “We know what you want, monster,” the voice interrupted. “And we're not telling you. We will not let you condemn poor Da–”

  “If you say his name, I will rip the door off and then rip your tongue out!” I interrupted this time.

  A pause on the other side. “We won't let you condemn his soul. God will not be denied another child.”

  “Who's God?” I asked. “Does he have my brother? Where is he? How do I find him? I thought our aunt and uncle had my brother.”

  “The only one interested in you is the Devil. You will burn in hell, monster.”

  This human wasn't making any sense. My brother was God's child? And where was Hell? Did he even know who I was looking for?

  The wail of a siren pierced the night. Red and blue lights flashed and a bright light washed over me. A silver and black car squealed to a halt, Vampire Forces gleaming on the side, and two humans jumped out. They stationed themselves on each side of the car, guns aimed at me. The one on the left was calm, his gun steady. His eyes held determination, a level of control that showed he knew what he was doing. The other was nervous. The gun in his hand wavered and sweat covered his brow.

  I gazed between the two, mind and instincts racing. I knew the threats these two humans were to me, understood who they were. Vampire Forces, humans who hunted and destroyed vampires. They combed the darkness, searching for the hunters and turning them into prey.

  The one to the right yelped when I lunged at him, knocking him into the car. A crack echoed, the other human shooting as I raced away. I ran until I reached the city, immersing myself in humans that didn't care I was a vampire.

  There, I resumed the search for my brother, pushing my close call with Vampire Forces to the back of my mind. I moved from street to street, approaching each human with extra caution. My first approaches had been too fast. To the human, I had simply appeared. The reactions were the same though, silence and stares.

  I asked other vampires about my brother as well. They shook their heads like the humans and hurried on their way. One warned me what streets Vampire Forces staked out in hopes of destroying vampires. If you value your survival, young one, avoid those streets, she warned.

  The restrictions made it hard; I wanted to search the streets I had to avoid. Often I abandoned my search, diving into the shadows as I caught sight of a silver and black car. Staying calm when talking to humans was becoming a chore. I sank a fang into my tongue more than once when biting my anger back.

  All to no avail. My brother had vanished into thin air. I desperately missed him, searching my mind for memories, sometimes hoping to stumble across a human memory that hadn't vanished. There were none and I replayed the few I had of him over and over.

  I knew I shouldn’t use his name, but I didn’t care. I wanted to find him. “Danny, where are you?”

  The only answer I heard was the city. It pulsed around me, thousands of rhythms beating out life. I trudged through it, feeling weak and fatigued, unable to focus or concentrate.

  I needed blood.

  I melted back into the shadows, pushing every thought but one away. My stance turned predatory, instincts whispering what to do. Each step became more careful, every sound taken into consideration as I hunted. I scanned the city streets, a sliver of nervousness tickling my mind.

  This was my third time hunting, but the first time in the city. What if something went wrong? What if the human fought? What if Vampire Forces caught me and destroyed me?

  Down a dark alley, a rhythm called to me. A human was curled on a pile of discarded newspapers, his snores bouncing off the alley walls. I moved closer, scanning the darkness. Why was he alone? Humans in the city knew to stay in groups.

  I stalked around the alley, checking and double checking for signs of other humans hiding, but there were no others hidden in the darkness. I turned to the human, rolling him over and exposing a dirty neck. A stale odor was thick on his breath, his body reeking of sweat and waste. Was this why this human was alone? The other humans were repelled by his filth?

  I rubbed at the dirt, trying to clear a spot. I licked my fingers, spit on the skin and cleaned until there was a sizable spot. Need warred with a nauseous feeling, the odor turning my stomach. My fangs refused to cooperate. Finally, I forced them out and bit.

  The stale smell of his breath was also in his blood. I gulped it down, choking as I struggled to finish. The stale taste coated my mouth and I licked at my lips, smacking them. Now I understood why this human was safe alone. I was tempted to find another human, wash the bad taste away. But I didn't. The weakness was gone and I was ready to begin my search for my brother anew.

  The air around me begged to differ, growing warmer as the sky lightened. It wouldn't be long before for the first rays appeared. Minutes maybe. I fled the city, heading for the cabin. A tingle crawled over my skin, the start of a burn as I rushed through the trees. I slammed to a halt and started digging, immersing myself in the ground.

  I waited in half awareness, trying to be patient. The stale blood had revitalized me and I was eager to resume my search. My mind mused on places to look, each spot revealing my brother. By the time the sun disappeared, I could barely stand it. I clawed my way out of the ground, racing towards the city.

  A scent drifting on the night air stopped me and I fell forward, my sudden halt throwing me off balance. I scrambled to my feet, turning in circles and catching the scent again. I raced back the way I came, the scent leading me straight to the cabin. Of course, the one night I opted to go straight to the city was when I should have checked the cabin first.

  I dashed around the
car parked next to the cabin, smelling my brother's scent. It led me to the front and I raced up the steps, stopped only by the energy surrounding the building.

  “Danny?”

  “I thought you said not to use each other's names?” He was relaxed in one of the sheet covered chairs, feet kicked up and a grin on his face. The smile faded as I remained in the doorway. “Can't you come in?”

  I lifted my hand, pressing against the energy. A snap cracked through the air, blue lightning spidering from where I touched it. My hand was thrown back, a jolt of pain running up my arm. “You have to welcome me in.”

  “Damn.” He jumped up and stopped on the other side. His hand was unaffected as he waved it through the doorway. “I wonder why it does that.”

  I tilted my head at him, then remembered he didn't like that. “Wouldn't it be bad if vampires could enter homes? There'd be no humans left. We'd kill you and then starve.”

  “Disturbingly, you have a point,” he sighed. “Well, come in.” He gasped as I lifted him off the floor in an embrace. He squirmed and struggled, face turning a little red. “Tommy, let go!”

  It was like I had no choice, my arms released him and he thudded to the floor. He grunted and winced in pain, then yelped in shock when I pulled him to his feet.

  “I've been looking for you,” I informed him. “All week. You weren't here or home, then an old human told me our aunt and uncle took you to the city and then she fell asleep on me. I've been half mad with worry. I thought maybe God took you to Heaven!”

  “What?” The question was accompanied with a burst of laughter.

  “I was looking for you, trying to find where our aunt and uncle took you, and this stupid human started rambling to me about God and Heaven and the Devil. Who are they and what do they have to do with us?”

  Tears were in my brother's eyes. He slumped back into the chair, beating on the arm with his fist as he roared with laughter. “You thought God was a person and heaven a place on earth? I can't breathe I'm laughing so hard!”

  “So this human was lying to me?” Fury boiled in me. I was going to find that human later and kill him! “Why are you laughing? I thought I wasn’t going to find you.” My voice turned timid, the anger fading into fear. “I thought I'd never see you again.”

  His laughter died and regret filled his eyes. “I'm sorry, To–”

  “When I said your name and you mine, that was an exception.”

  “Oh,” he mumbled. He looked at me, curiosity shimmering in his eyes. “Have you really been looking for me all week?”

  “Yes. Why didn't you come back here? How come you were never home?” I demanded, releasing my pent up worry.

  “I was getting settled in at Aunt Dee and Uncle Dick's. Do you remember them?”

  “No, who are they?”

  “Mom's sister and brother-in-law. We'd always go visit and you and I would sit bored out of our minds the whole time. No games or TV or anything,” he explained. “I spent the whole week moving stuff from home to there. Next week I go back to school.”

  “You're not going to live at home?” I asked, crestfallen. “I thought we’d be together, in our home.”

  His eyes widened in shock. “You want to stay with me?”

  “Yes, I figured if I behaved, the humans wouldn't bother me. That’s how it was in the city.”

  “Aunt Dee said there were a bunch of vampires in the city. She said they're like bees, let them be and you won't get stung. Uncle Dick said people should call VF and every vampire be destroyed. I reminded him you were one now.” His smile turned into a frown.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked. If my brother was staying with our relatives, then so was I.

  “Everyone expects me to believe the same, that I should hate you.” He looked away, voice hollow and sad. “Maybe I should, but I can't. When you got home, you went straight to your room without a word to me. I sat in the hallway trying to figure out what was wrong. I stayed there until Mom made me go to bed.”

  “That other room is mine?”

  “Yeah, we used to share a room, then Dad separated us. We spent all our time in yours because you had the TV.” He fondly smiled and I felt slightly envious he remembered and I couldn't. “Anyways, I don't know what woke me. Don't even know why I got out of bed. Something pulled me down the hall and there you were; Dad already dead and Mom dying. I was horrified.” He looked up at me. “But it was you and I... You had been missing almost two days. You never left without telling me before.”

  “So you don't know how the vampire found me?”

  He shook his head. “There have been rumors of vampires staring in windows and willing people to open them. Nobody said it, but I knew that’s what Mom and Dad thought happened to you.”

  “But if they thought a vampire got me, why did they let me in?”

  “Probably didn't think about it, they were too happy to have you home to even notice how you looked,” he sighed.

  “Are you still upset I murdered our parents?”

  “I'm not upset.”

  “Good.”

  “I'm sad.”

  “Oh.”

  He shook his head. “Your apathy is going to take some getting used to. I'm always gonna be sad about Mom and Dad and if you were human, you'd be too.”

  “They'd be alive if I were human,” I pointed out.

  He grumbled. “I'll be sad for the both of us. I'm sure there are support groups or something. Anyways, I saw you killing our parents but I dunno, I can't hate you. You're all I’ve got now.”

  “You're all I’ve got too,” I replied. “What do we do now? I'll go where you go.”

  He averted his eyes. “You can't, Uncle Dick wouldn't hesitate to try to kill you himself.”

  “I'll kill him first,” I replied darkly.

  “No,” he sighed again. “You're not going to kill any more of our family.”

  It didn't miss my attention that he didn't use my name. He could have used my name and I'd be more likely to listen – would listen. Maybe not using my name was his faith in me. He hoped deep down there was something human left.

  I tilted my head at him, staring until he shifted uncomfortably. “I'm not human. Don't treat me like one in hopes I'll change. I kill whoever I want and anyone that tries to keep us apart.”

  “Will you?” he challenged.

  “Yes!” I insisted, then remembered my internal struggle on my second night. “No,” I amended. “I wouldn't kill someone if it hurt you.”

  A faint trace of a smile filled his face. “Guess I can settle with that for now.” He kicked back, lacing his fingers behind his head. “I'll just have to work on training you again. Took me fifteen years to get you to listen to me when you were human. Should take no time this time around.”

  I laughed despite myself.

  “Creepy,” he informed me. Sadness crossed his face, along with guilt. “I better go. I kinda took the car without permission. Aunt Dee would crap kittens if she found out I took it out of the city after dark – with no license.”

  “But when will I see you again? Are you sure I can't come?”

  “You know, your voice almost sounded like it had emotions,” he replied. “You can't and I dunno when I'll get the chance to visit.”

  I exaggerated every emotion so he wouldn't miss them. I scowled and frowned; irritated, I told him I wouldn't kill someone because of him. If I could kill my uncle, then this problem would be solved. Our aunt sounded like, as long as I didn't bother her, she wouldn't mind me there.

  “You're acting like a baby,” he chuckled.

  I bit back a growl, annoyed I didn't have a retort.

  “You were always bad at comebacks too.” He shrugged, trying to act casual despite the hitch in his heartbeat my glare caused. “Fine, you big, fanged baby. How about this: I'll show you where I'm living now and you can visit whenever you want.” He jabbed a finger at me. “But you can't come inside.”

  “Not your home to welcome me in to,” I smugly retorted.


  He waved his hand dismissively. “The roof of the back porch is right under my window. You can sit outside and we can play video games until the sun comes up. Just like we used to. Come on, I'm driving.”

  ****

  “Do you dream?”

  I sat outside the window to my brother’s room in our aunt and uncle’s house. He was almost opposite of me, sitting on his bed, and leaning against the window frame. A curious look filled his face, waiting for me to answer.

  “I don't sleep. I close my eyes and relax and when the sun sets, I open them.”

  “Relax?” he asked after a curious silence.

  “I rest,” I clarified. “My mind is still active, still thinking, but at the same time I'm relaxed.”

  “You think?” he teased with a smile.

  I frowned long enough for him to see. “Didn't I as a human?”

  “I'm joking,” he replied in a sour voice. He turned his back to me, a succession of clicks sounded as he grumbled at the video game. Once he finished assaulting the buttons, he turned back to me. “Are you sure you don't want to play?”

  “No,” I said, staring across the rooftops.

  Lights glimmered in windows, most only thin lines of light that escaped through closed curtains. In the distance, tall, dark buildings rose into the night sky. At the end of the street, twin lights appeared and a familiar drone grew in the night, one I learned to recognize as a Vampire Forces car.

  I froze, pressing against the side of the house. “Turn the light off and shut the curtains.”

  “Why?”

  “Just do it!”

  The light died and fabric slid along metal. As quickly as it came, the car disappeared around the corner, the drone fading.

  “Okay, you can turn the light back on.”

  “What was that about?”

  “Another vampire told me to watch out for Vampire Forces. She said they'd follow until sunrise, finding where I rest,” I explained.

  “You know other vampires?”

  I shook my head. “I saw her on the street while looking for you. She said to avoid certain areas because of Vampire Forces.”