by Elle Linder
“You’re telling me you don’t want me? And you want him?” It was senseless to lie. He could probably read her mind with his superhero powers. Or more like she was a horrible liar. So, she remained silent as her labored breathing answered for her.
He cupped her face, “Tell me you don’t want me.” He stared fiercely into her eyes. “Say it, if that’s how you feel.”
“I can’t be with you.” A tear broke free, then another. She might as well admit her heart’s desire because Parker was no fool. Stubborn in her resolve though, she remained unyielding to him despite the tears that gave away her true feelings.
“‘Can’t’ and ‘don’t want to’ are different things.” Then her imprisoned desires got their wish—his mouth smashed hard against hers, and his arms wrapped around her tightly. Slowly his hands traveled down her back to her ass, where he caressed her until she weakened. Lost in him, his touch, his lips…his mouth on her neck, her body yielded as he licked a path up to her earlobe. Nibble after delicious nibble, powerful tingles erupted when he pulled her body even tighter against his.
Her breath caught, and she was instantly wet. “We can’t do this.” She pushed him back. “I’m having dinner with another man tonight.”
“Cancel.”
“No, I can’t.”
“Why are you doing this? None of this makes sense. You want me, but you’re holding back. Why?”
“Parker…” She took an exasperated breath.
“No... I am not giving up on us.”
“Please, in the long run, you’ll see it was the right decision.”
“I can’t even believe this!” He threw up his hands, turned on his heel and walked out of her office, defeated.
In his Range Rover, Parker’s heart pounded against his chest while Marie’s words whirled around in his head. Her taste still on his lips. He had to call the one person who could help. But first, he called Dave. He needed him to ask Brooke for Ann’s number. Five minutes later he called Ann on his way home.
“Hello.”
“Ann, it’s Parker.”
“Oh, what can I do for you?”
“Don’t pretend like you have no idea why I’m calling. You’re her best friend. Why is she doing this? She said she’s going out tonight with some guy.”
“Parker, I’m sorry. But you know I can’t tell you anything. I can’t risk losing her trust.”
He hit the steering wheel. “Dammit! Please help me. I need her, Ann. And she needs me. What is she afraid of? Why is she pushing me away?”
“I can’t tell you anything. But if you asked me questions, I could answer yes or no,” she offered.
“Okay. I’ll take it, thank you. First question, Marie wants to be with me, doesn’t she?” He held his breath waiting for her response.
“Yes.”
He knew it and sighed, releasing his tension and fear.
“Does this have to do with what Craig said on Saturday?”
“Yes.”
“Ann, this will take all day. Please.”
She sighed and grumbled under her breath. Parker knew Ann would be risking her friendship with Marie if she told him anything. But he was desperate.
“I better not regret this. She believes she’s doing you a favor ending it before it gets started. In her mind, she’s beneath you and you deserve better than her. She doesn’t want to complicate your life with her mess. And she believes you’ll leave her for a younger woman and break her heart. Basically, she’s afraid. She thinks if she stops now, she won’t fall in love with you.”
“Can you believe this? What about the guy? Who is he? She said he’s divorced, and he understands her. And he’s a real guy. Whatever that means.”
“You’re the ‘fantasy’ guy. The ‘out of her league’ guy. This other guy is a distraction to help her forget about you. He’s nice and attractive, but he’s not you. But, he wants her. And she’s insecure and very vulnerable. I’ll be straight with you, that’s a dangerous combination in a woman. It makes us weak, and we don’t think straight. We need affection and to feel desired. Read that as sex.”
“Shit, and she’s having dinner with him tonight.”
“Yes. I hope you can get through to her. She cares for you. It’s why she’s giving you up. Just remember, she’s scared. Her pathetic ex did a number on her their whole marriage and he’s still controlling her.”
“I hate that guy. Thanks for your help, Ann.”
“You bet…good luck.”
Marie prepared for her date with Seth and in the process worked herself up into a nervous frenzy. Parker stayed on her mind after he had left her office. The pain in his eyes tormented her, while his words played over and over in her head, “Tell me you don’t want me.” The knock at the door rattled her. It would be Seth, and she was having second thoughts about their date after seeing Parker. But alas, there was no turning back now.
“Hi.” She smiled as she opened the door. Seth looked handsome in a blue button-down oxford shirt and khakis.
“Marie, you’re gorgeous.” A sweet compliment to be sure, however, the taupe sheath dress and black wedge heels were her standard work clothes. There was nothing special about them. Marie had carefully selected her clothes, so as not to tempt him. Unfortunately, by the look on his face, she had failed.
“Thank you.”
“Shall we go?” She nodded.
They walked out to Seth’s charcoal grey Ford Explorer. The evening was off to an average, non-intimidating start.
Dinner was pleasant and typical as it was before Parker. Just everyday, ordinary Marie who flew under the radar and whom no one cared about. Why would she want to change it? It was a stark contrast to her dates with Parker and worrying about fans or the paparazzi.
This was fine, other than one fundamental fact—she wasn’t with Parker. As much as she tried to open herself up to Seth, it wasn’t easy. Seated across from him comfortably, she enjoyed his company. But comfortable didn’t mean much, now that her head had cleared, and she wasn’t coming apart at the seams. Through their entire meal, she couldn’t dismiss the shame residing within her for what she did with him. Even though she had lost her mind, she felt she owed him a do-over, to make up for using him, and to see if something would develop. The thought had entered her mind earlier that her feelings toward Seth might change after she got over Parker.
They arrived back at Marie’s, and she invited him in for a cup of coffee. They had been talking about custody issues on the drive, and she was curious about his experiences. His wife hadn’t cooperated with his kids, and Marie could relate. Craig was never cooperative. Now Seth’s kids were adults, and his ex-wife didn’t have control over when they visited him.
“So, when will you see them again?” Marie asked as she sipped her coffee.
“I’m planning a week with them before they go back to college. I’d like you to meet them.” Seth ran his hand down the length of her hair. A sweet display of affection that didn’t light her fire. Perhaps she needed to try harder.
“Seth, that might be premature.” There was no might about it. It was crazy.
“I’m here with you now, and you’ve given me hope.” Seth kissed Marie, probing her tight lips actively and it became clear he was trying to stir her up like the other day. But, she quickly realized, it was futile. With Seth, she remained detached and unemotional. It wasn’t natural like it was with Parker.
He pulled back. “It’s him, isn’t it?”
“What do you mean?”
“When we kissed the other day… Oh, I get it. That was your pain and neediness. You wanted to forget him. It wasn’t about me, was it?”
“I’m sorry. I was in a bad place. I told you that, but I’m trying now.” She leaned forward and kissed him, in a friendly, benign sort of way.
“I don’t want to compete with another guy. If it didn’t work out, that’s one thing. If you still want him, then I’m the distraction.” He held her hands. “I like you, and I want a chance with you, but only w
hen you’re ready. I want you to kiss me with passion like the other day, but not because you’re thinking of him.”
“Seth, you’re right. Let’s try one more time.” It was her turn to take charge of the kiss. She pulled him close, and with a passionate intent pressed her lips to his. Then she touched his arms, enjoying the strength within them as she tried to turn him on. It worked. In one swift move, she was on her back, and he was on her. The kiss, his hands touching her hips—nothing. No arousal. Just a blank emptiness. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t muster up the passion. The heat. A rapid knock at the door startled her, and she froze. Three more rhythmic beats echoed.
“Are you expecting anyone?” Seth asked, from atop her with a firm package pressed against her thigh.
“No, but I should answer the door,” she said with relief.
He climbed off her reluctantly and helped her up. Before she could leave, he kissed her once more. Still nothing. On her way to the door, she took a deep breath…grateful for the Good Samaritan’s interruption. She fixed her dress, then ran her fingers through her tousled hair. Marie opened the door, and her eyes widened.
“Hi, beautiful.”
“Parker,” she whispered, pushing him backward. She fumbled for the doorknob and managed to close the door. “What are you doing here? I told you.” He pressed his fingers to her lips silencing her, and familiar tingles coursed through her body as he held her gaze.
“Yeah, I heard what you told me, and I told you I wasn’t giving up on us. I assume your date is still here by the looks of your messy hair, flushed face and the fact that you didn’t invite me in?” Parker didn’t hide the tension in his jaw or his disappointment, and it broke her heart. “I’ve interrupted something, so I’ll leave.” He turned around to walk to his car.
“Wait!” She covered her mouth, shocked by her panicked tone. Parker stopped and looked back at her. “I…” The door opened, causing Marie to stumble back into the house, right into Seth. His hand gripped her waist and Parker glared.
“What are you doing out on the doorstep with,” —he paused— “Parker Nichols?”
Parker nodded.
“Wow, please come in.”
As Parker stepped inside, he winked at Marie. Even as he teased her during an uncomfortable situation, she still found him intoxicating. She closed the door, then leaned against it for support. This couldn’t be happening. They stared at each other...the worst kind of awkward moment.
“Seth, this is Parker Nichols. Parker, this is Seth Gibson.” The two men shook hands. Could she crawl under a rock? Parker didn’t take his eyes off her, and neither did Seth. Just weeks ago, she didn’t have a man and now she had two men in her foyer. Was she getting punked by life?
“Is he the guy?” Seth asked.
Marie nodded.
“Holy shit!”
She looked at him, insulted. “Holy shit? What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I just mean he’s a celebrity.”
“And?” She crossed her arms over her chest but when she pushed her hip out, a small curve formed in the corner of Parker’s mouth and she glared at him.
“Look, I’ll leave you to your evening,” Parker announced, then promptly took Marie’s hand and pulled her outside, closing the door behind him. “We aren’t done. I don’t care about this guy. I’m not giving up on us,” he declared, turning to leave. “I’ll call you.”
“Parker,” she called, following him down the cement walkway, “Why did you come? I told you this afternoon we wouldn’t work.” The door opened and before he could say anything. Seth walked out toward them, a determined expression on his face.
“Marie, I’m leaving. I can’t stay when you want him, Parker Nichols!” he said in disbelief. “If things don’t work out, you know where I live.” He kissed her on the cheek. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Nichols.”
“Yeah, and Seth…”
Seth stopped and turned around.
“We will work out.”
Seth nodded and threw up a dismissive wave. Parker looked at Marie, whose mouth was ajar.
“How can you say that? You don’t know if we’ll work out!” She pushed her hip out and crossed her arms. He smiled, taking her hand, and they walked back inside. Marie’s reluctance as she tried to pull back didn’t dissuade him. Parker stopped at the sofa, motioning for her to sit. Once she did, he sat beside her, thighs touching and shoulder to shoulder. And tingles sparked.
“Yes, I know we’ll work out. I feel it in my bones. You need me and I sure as hell need you.” He played with the tips of her fingers, a seemingly benign gesture that melted her every time. She knew that the power within his fingers was the same power that filled every inch of his body; she couldn’t help but fall under his spell.
“Now talk to me. I’m not going anywhere until we work this out.”
“You barged into my home like you’re a damn celebrity. And Seth gushed over you!” She paused, staring at his handsome face and million-dollar smile. But Marie had to keep her wits about her before she crumbled to his charms. It would be so easy to succumb to the fantasy of him and taking a stroll, albeit a short one, into the vortex that was the Rich and Famous. Then Jackson entered her mind, and she knew she had to be stronger than Parker’s sensual fingers. “I mean really, I had a guest, and it was after nine. You can’t do that! You knew I had a date tonight.”
Marie suddenly realized that with the tension in his jaw and the hard stare that bore through her, even he couldn’t maintain control at all times. He was real.
“I don’t want you dating other men,” he said abruptly.
“You don’t control me! We take a quick trip to Vegas and what, now you own me?”
“It’s not like that and you know it. Why do you continue to push me away when I’m here pouring my heart out to you? Damn it, Marie! Don’t you think it’s fucking killing me that that guy Seth was kissing you before I arrived, and I don’t want to know what else.” He shuddered, squeezing his eyes tight as if blocking the image of her with Seth out of his head. The glossy sheen blanketing his eyes when they opened gripped her. “Shit, I’m not made of steel!”
“I guess you’re not, Professor Pierce,” she whispered, looking down at her lap. “Did you see the look on Seth’s face when he said, ‘he’s a celebrity’? You’re out of my league, Parker. You deserve better than me.”
“No, you’re out of my league.” He held her hands, and she met his distressed gaze. “You’re the most incredible woman, don’t you see that? It’s only you, baby… Only you.” His sincerity was more than she could take. With every fiber of her being she wanted to believe him…she wanted…him.
Quiet, tension-filled seconds passed between them. Parker’s words hung in the air. The moment she leaned toward him as if knowing her thoughts, he engulfed her lips, kissing her with a passion that was, well, real. Parker never hid his emotions as he kissed her. It was just how she loved it, since their first kiss. Every nerve in her body awakened. It was only him too.
Time stood still for them, filled with warm and tender kisses. With their dance of tongues, they were desperate for the song to never to end. Overcome by the sensations triggered by his mouth, her body trembled, and a soft moan flowed out of her. Painful yet pleasure-filled, the melody unleashed his desire for more; he pulled her onto him, splayed his hands over her ass and their bodies molded into one. The desperation of her kisses took off when he cupped her breast. The gentle, tantalizing way he kneaded and pressed his thumb over her nipple sent tremors through her. Even through the barrier of her clothes, his touch elicited arousal.
“I need you, Marie,” he said through his kisses. “You matter to me more than I can express. Spend the weekend with me?”
She shook her head.
“Spend the night with me, and I’ll show you how much you matter to me.” To further entice, his hand moved down between her legs.
“Oh, Parker!” She quaked while he tempted her one stroke at a time. Each thoughtful glide of
his fingers intended to rouse her craving for more. It worked, and she about came apart right there in his hands. The force of his touch intensified her kisses, increasing her thirst for him while she held him tight, pressing against him.
“Say yes,” he coaxed as wetness seeped through her satiny undergarment. “Say…yes.”
“Yes.”
Chapter 13
Making Love
Friday afternoon, Marie left work early to prepare for her weekend with Parker. Ann planned to meet her at home for moral support, and because Marie likely would come unhinged. But it was a call from Lexi that unhinged her.
“What do you mean you won’t be home this weekend? Isaac and I were going to stop by. Where are you going?” Lexi asked. Marie collapsed on her bed. She couldn’t tell her she’d be spending the weekend with Parker. That would be inappropriate, and Abuelita would surely turn in her grave, or worse, return from the dead to scold her for her lack of virtue and chastity in person.
“I’m spending the weekend with Brooke,” she blurted.
I’m a liar.
“Ha! Not true. I saw on Twitter that Brooke and her hunky boyfriend Dave will be in San Francisco this weekend. Why are you lying to me?”
“Oh, I meant to say, Ann. Did I say Brooke?”
“Mom, if you’re spending the weekend with Parker, you can be honest with me. I’m not a kid, and it’s not like I haven’t had sex before.”
“Lexi!”
“Mom relax, I’m an adult.” She laughed.
“No, you’re my little girl. Are you using protection?” The second the words left her lips she cringed. How could she ask such a question when she wasn’t even on birth control and had plans for a sex-filled weekend? Well, she hoped it would be a sex-filled weekend.
“Seriously, that’s the question you’re going to ask me? After all the talks you gave me about unplanned pregnancy and condoms failing. ‘Take control of your fertility, Lexi,’ you chanted. In case you didn’t know, I actually listened, Mom. I’ve been on birth control for two years now. After taking the pill for a year I forgot to take it two days in a row and freaked, so I got an IUD put in. I’m good as gold. Or more like copper.” She laughed. “Now fess up.”