My Beginning With Mr. Darcy [Book Two]

by Lauren King

  “Please, join me, Elizabeth. I would like for you to accompany me if you are not dancing this set.”

  “My partner for this set seems to have forgotten our dance; he is busy with other…more interesting things to do, I suppose. I would be glad to accompany you, Lady Matlock.” Elizabeth needs a distraction or else she will wallow in self pity and disappointment. She is very glad that Lady Matlock seems to be on her side. Would she still be on Elizabeth’s side if she knew of her new daughter-in-law’s involvement? Elizabeth is hurt that William forgot about their dance set because he was pleasantly occupied by Miss Juliet and her mother. She was afraid that something like this Miss-Juliet-situation would happen, and now it is happening. She must take a hold of her feelings and not let it overwhelm her here.

  As Elizabeth starts to walk off with Lady Matlock, she sees from her peripheral view that William is walking towards her. She does not stop or turn towards him; she continues walking with Lady Matlock. After a few more steps, William reaches her side. “Lady Matlock, Miss Elizabeth, I beg your pardon.” Darcy says amiably as all three of them stop. “May I escort you ladies?” After quickly looking to his Aunt, Darcy turns his gaze back at Elizabeth, but she continues to look at Lady Matlock. She refuses to look at him.

  “Miss Elizabeth was standing alone, so I have asked her to accompany me. I plan to introduce her to some important society lady friends of mine. Are you done with your friends, Darcy?” Lady Matlock is also curious to hear Darcy’s explanation. She is afraid that there will be trouble as a result of Darcys conduct. She hopes that it will be resolvable to everyone’s satisfaction. Elizabeth is a sharp young lady; she will not be easily pacified with just any excuse.

  “Yes, Aunt; I was persuaded to help Richard with something, and then it became an unwelcomed situation that I could not remove myself from without looking rude to your guests. May I escort you both to your friends?”

  “Why do you not go settle things with Richard while I introduce Miss Elizabeth to some of my friends, and then I will guide her into supper? Will that be all right with you, Miss Elizabeth?”

  “Yes, that is fine with me, thank you, Lady Matlock.” Elizabeth still looks only at Lady Matlock.

  “Miss Elizabeth, I will wait to escort you into supper.” Darcy says nicely while intently gazing at Elizabeth. He impatiently awaits for her to look at him directly.

  Elizabeth briefly looks at William when she says, “You need not if you are busy, sir.” Her response is forthright and serene – no smile, just composure. Elizabeth fully comprehends that William does not need her smiles when he can have plenty others from young ladies who are more fitting with him.

  “I am not busy, Miss Elizabeth.” Darcy counters gently. He wants to reach for her hand so he can feel her love, but he cannot be that forward in public when they are not yet married.

  “As you wish, sir.” Elizabeth’s response is casual – hurt and jealousy overcomes her; she, intensely, tries to contain them. She detests these emotions, especially as they pertain to William. It is further accentuated when William does not explain his actions immediately. However, she realizes that he cannot stand here and explain in front of Lady Matlock; nonetheless, it is irritating and heart wrenching. She needs to calm herself before anger and tears burst forth to embarrass her.

  As Lady Matlock introduces Elizabeth as a close family friend, some of the ladies’ sons appear by their mother’s side; obviously, everyone is introduced to Elizabeth. It is evident that Elizabeth is admired by these young men. Lady Matlock does not want there to be any misunderstanding; Darcy will be very upset. Promptly, Lady Matlock quietly corrects herself with her lady friends – Elizabeth is betrothed to her nephew, Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy. Instantly, her friends seem disappointed. Lady Matlock can tell that Elizabeth could easily attract men who would extend themselves to her regardless of her dowry size. Darcy must recognize this, does he not? Elizabeth is too loyal and loving to do anything improper, though. On the other hand, Darcy should not take this for granted and conduct himself as he has been towards Elizabeth. How could he have left her standing by herself while he spoke with other ladies? And how is Richard involved? Lady Matlock sighs slightly; she will find out from Richard.

  Darcy sees that some of Lady Matlock’s lady friends are introducing some young men to Elizabeth. They must be their sons. Elizabeth seems to greet them courteously; the gentlemen are apparent with their admiration of her. Is Elizabeth upset with him? He has to explain to her why he missed their supper dance set. Yes, that must be what she is upset at. He should have been firmer with Mrs. Barrington to prevent their conversation from progressing that long. He just did not want to be rude because Mrs. Barrington was so pleased to speak with him. Now, he has to stand here and observe his betrothed being admired by all these men – his betrothed! His jealousy and possessiveness surfaces; on top of which, he is angry at himself for missing their dance set. Elizabeth is going to think that he forgot about her; he is really annoyed and anxious with his mistake, now.

  About a quarter of an hour later, Darcy sees his Uncle approach his Aunt and Elizabeth; his Uncle offers both ladies his arm, and then they walk towards the formal dining room. Darcy efficiently intercepts them. “May I offer you my arm, Miss Elizabeth?” He tries to catch Elizabeth’s eyes, but she does not look directly at him.

  “Thank you, sir.” Elizabeth stiffly takes his arm as she looks to the side away from him; she barely has her hand resting on his arm as they walk at a polite distance from each other behind Lord and Lady Matlock. She does not want him to feign his continued interest in her. He should just go and talk to Miss Juliet, already. However, Elizabeth knows that William would not be that blatantly rude and ungentlemanly. After all, they are still considered engaged. Elizabeth wishes that this night would simply end; she has had enough.

  Elizabeth and William are seated at a separate table from Miss Juliet’s, but they are facing her directly. From her discreet glances, Elizabeth sees that Miss Juliet is gazing at William, often. William smiles back at her only once, but that is sufficiently bad! This is unbelievable! She knew that marrying William was too good to be true. Well, she will think of it all as a dream – a loving, cherished dream – nevertheless, a dream. It is cruel to be plucked away at this point, but everyone has to wake from a dream.

  Elizabeth answers William’s questions nicely, but she does not add more to their conversation. She does not feel up to chatting with him as if nothing has occurred. She barely eats any of her food because she has lost her appetite. That is what happens when she is worried or is depressed; in this case, she is both. With a polite smile, she continues to answer William throughout their supper. She does not want to cause a scene or cause gossip. Their situation is personal; therefore, she will not let anyone, especially Miss Juliet and her Mother, know how distressed and disturbed she is. If William wishes to part from her, then at least she can leave with self-respect, pride, and poise. She will be the epitome of a gentlewoman: dignified, composed, unaffected.

  Quietly, Darcy says to Elizabeth, “Lizzy, we do not have to stay until the end of this party.” He wants to talk with her away from all these people.

  Elizabeth responds while looking down at her plate without eating. “I understand if you would like to take me home, sir.” Of course, if she is not present, then he could have the excuse to converse with other young ladies. “Maybe we should finish this meal so that we do not cause talk for leaving the celebrations midway. I would not want to appear rude or ill-mannered in front of your family and friends.” She does not know how she can tolerate not talking about this subject until tomorrow, but she will have to control herself. Georgiana and Mrs. Annesley will be riding with them. That will be good; they will distract her.

  “You are never rude or ill-mannered, Miss Elizabeth. I only offered to take you home if you were not feeling well.” Darcy is surprised at Elizabeth’s comments.

  “Why would you think that I was unwell?” Is he just trying to come up with
an excuse to take her home? She understands his dilemma of having her stay longer while Miss Juliet is also present, but he does not have to pretend.

  “You do not talk to me as you normally do. You do not seem happy to be here.” Darcy replies quietly and with concern.

  “I am sorry that I have been too unguarded and too bold in the past months. It will not happen again.” She should not have allowed so many liberties between them. That is right; this may be their last outing with each other. It hurts her heart to think that William will no longer be with her, but she cannot force him to want her above his past desire. He will attend parties with Miss Juliet. Elizabeth will reside with her Uncle’s family by herself. The crush of her heart is excruciating.

  “Miss Elizabeth, you are misinterpreting what I am saying, but this is not the right place to discuss this.” Darcy is worried at the direction of their conversation.

  “You are correct; this is not the place to discuss this.” Elizabeth remains quiet.

  After a quiet, unremitting supper, Elizabeth tells William, “Mr. Darcy, if you do not wish to leave yet, then I would like to sit with Georgie for a bit. Please, you do not feel that you have to entertain me. I want to check in on her again and make sure she is well.” The only dance set that she is promised to is the last set with William. She does not want to force William to stand by her side while Miss Juliet gazes at him, yearningly, and he cannot reciprocate. More importantly, she definitely does not wish to ever see William admire another young lady; she would not be able to restrain her pain if she saw it.

  “Is she unwell? You have checked in on her already?” Darcy says with some concern.

  “I am sorry if I alarmed you. She is well; I just did not want her to be bored or tired, so I checked in on her earlier.” Elizabeth responds straightforwardly but blandly.

  “We can go check on her again.”

  “If you wish.” Elizabeth could not very well keep him from checking on his own sister.

  After Georgiana assures Darcy and Elizabeth that she is fine, they leave to go back out to the ballroom. Richard merrily approaches them.

  “I thought you both had decided to leave already. Darcy, are you not going to dance?” Richard is amiable and animated.

  “You should go dance, Mr. Darcy; Colonel Fitzwilliam is correct. You both should go dance.” Elizabeth makes a deliberate effort to tease Richard so she does not have to converse with William. “Colonel Fitzwilliam, I think Miss Grace Winchester is looking at you as we speak. You should go be with her.” Elizabeth smiles nicely to show that she is fine with the idea. If William leaves her here and goes to dance with another young lady, then she will know what to do.

  “Miss Elizabeth, would you like to dance this set since we did not dance the supper set?”

  “That is alright, Mr. Darcy; there is no need to recompense for it. It was merely a dance set. I will go speak with Lady Matlock; do not worry about me. Please, have fun with Colonel Fitzwilliam and your other friends.” Elizabeth smiles prettily but inside she is a wreck. This reminds her of when she felt that William did not want her at Darcy House. Her angst and unease prod at her, but she pushes it back to the recesses of her mind. She feels worse as more time goes by and her imagination runs wild without William’s explanations.

  “Come on, Darcy. Miss Elizabeth says you can go; you need to help me.” Richard pronounces gaily as he flicks his head towards Miss Grace Winchester who is approached by Miss Juliet and their respective Mothers.

  Elizabeth casually looks over to where Richard is indicating his interest, and she sees two giggling young ladies – Miss Grace Winchester and Miss Juliet Barrington. If William follows Richard over to those two young ladies, Elizabeth will end their engagement tonight when he escorts her home. Minimally, he can, have the decency not to flaunt his interest in front of her face! Breathe calmly, breathe.

  Elizabeth takes slow calming breaths to slow her anxious, tense heart. She is surprised that Richard seems oblivious to what he is asking of William. Elizabeth has figured it out. Richard probably asked William to dance with Miss Juliet so that he could dance with Miss Grace Winchester. But, why would Richard need William’s help in order to dance with Miss Grace Winchester? Maybe, Miss Grace Winchester said that she wanted Miss Juliet to dance the same set with her, thus Richard had to persuade William to dance with Miss Juliet. That sounds logical. However, that is not a good enough reason for William to dance with a hopeful young lady with whom he has had history. Did he not figure that the young lady would misunderstand his intentions? He cannot see that? Really, who could not see that Miss Grace Winchester was trying to create an opportunity for Miss Juliet with William? It was clear as day! If William and Richard cannot see this, then they are dense! In any case, it was partly Richard’s fault for putting William in that position.

  Richard must know that many of these young ladies have some sort of hope in regards to William; therefore, they should be avoided at all costs. William should not be dancing with any of them. Richard seems so worldly and wise to these types of situations, yet he involved William while Elizabeth was present. Maybe Richard is too caught up in his own situation to think clearly? But he is a colonel in the Army for goodness sakes; they have to be able to think strategically with thoughts on potential outcomes, possibilities, and consequences in mind in order to be successful in battle. There is no way Richard cannot recognize the adverse ramification for William in this circumstance.

  Elizabeth will rethink her friendship with Richard. Elizabeth does not want a friend who will disregard her feelings; she would not disregard his. She does not think Richard has considered her feelings as William’s betrothed. It is unbelievable that Richard cannot see that he and William look like eligible bachelors pursuing two young ladies with the way they are acting tonight. She is certain that Richard could have secured Miss Grace Winchester’s dance set without involving William. Anyways…if Elizabeth and William break up, then she will most likely not associate with Richard anymore, anyways. She is certain that Richard will not feel the loss of her friendship. She cannot be more disappointed in Richard and William for their comportment tonight.

  Elizabeth wants to see what William will do. She will not give any hints of what she wants from him.

  “Elizabeth, is your dance card full?” Darcy asks nicely.

  UNBELIEVABLE! William is actually considering helping Richard again? He is going to dance or talk with Miss Juliet again for Richard? Elizabeth is more certain, now, that Richard asked William to dance with Miss Juliet previously. HOWEVER, William should have known better than to dance with Miss Juliet. This is humiliating, but Elizabeth calmly says, “Mr. Darcy, do not worry about me. It looks like Richard needs your help with a young lady.” And to think that William has told her that he would not put any of his friends before her…well, Richard is a cousin, not a friend. Perhaps, his relatives will take precedence over her. She should be happy that she comes before one group of people, at least.

  Darcy is surprised at how easy Elizabeth is with all of this; he thought that she would have been annoyed. She wears a polite smile; she has been courteous and reserved throughout supper. Now, she is tolerating standing by herself while he helps Richard with a young-lady-situation. This is definitely not right. He would not have tolerated it if Elizabeth was in his shoes today. “But I always worry for you.”

  “You should not have to worry about someone constantly like that. I am sure it must be tiresome.” Elizabeth states plainly.

  “Miss Elizabeth, we need to talk.” Afterwards, Darcy turns to Richard and says, “I need to talk with Miss Elizabeth; I cannot help you this time, Richard.”

  “Aww, Darcy. Come on, Miss Elizabeth said she does not mind.” Richard coaxes.

  “But I mind.” Darcy states resolutely. Darcy gives Richard the do-not-say-another-word look.

  “I did not say I did not mind, Colonel Fitzwilliam.” Elizabeth says decisively with a serious expression. Goodness gracious, Richard does not realize what
he is doing! She is very peeved with him, currently. She will have to make her viewpoint clear. “I said that you need Mr. Darcy’s help with a young lady.” Elizabeth looks at Richard emotionlessly to show her dissatisfaction. If Richard does not figure out that he has offended Elizabeth with what he has done and has asked of William, then she will distance herself from him as soon as possible. She will only consider Richard as an acquaintance; she refuses to be close with someone who disregards her so easily. He cannot be so naïve that he does not know that involving William in this manner will definitely offend her tremendously.

  Richard can see the change in Elizabeth’s speech and demeanor even though she is still polite. Something must have happened between her and Darcy. He hopes that it is nothing serious. “Well…I will go speak with Miss Grace, then. I will see you both a little later. Everything alright?” Richard quickly looks at Darcy and then glances at Elizabeth, but she has already turned her face away.

  Elizabeth does not answer Richard’s general question; he should know what he did is not ‘alright’. What he did was provoking and insulting towards her. Richard and Darcy look at each other with concern and apprehension about imposing any more questions upon Elizabeth. Richard bows quickly before leaving.

  Once Richard leaves, Elizabeth says, “You can join Colonel Fitzwilliam if you like, Mr. Darcy.” She does not look at William, but she decides that she will show him that she is not angry so he can make his decision without undue influence. She wants him to be happy with his decision. Elizabeth smiles prettily but without enthusiasm.

  “I would like to stay with you.”

  “I hope you know that you are not obligated to stay.” She refuses for him to ever turn this around and blame her for obligating him when he had a clear opportunity to pursue Miss Juliet.

  “Miss Elizabeth, are you upset at me for missing the supper dance set?” He cannot wait until they can talk openly about her apparent irritation.