To-Do Him List

by Denise Marie

  While on tour, Isabelle described her position as mother hen of the group. She was right. The way she stared at the pictures each day told him it stressed her beyond words not to be at Isabelle’s side, insisting she recover faster. She did now. He laughed at her demand for Isabelle to wake her lazy ass up.

  The messages from the girls he’d expected. The ones from the guys, no. He sat back in the chair and ran his fingers through his hair with one hand, held his knee down with the other. They cracked jokes about how much of an ass he was after she left, about the shows she missed. All of their messages ended with, I love you.

  He sat on the edge of his chair and took her hand when the last of the messages played. “No pressure…okay, lots. I need you. Since the moment you walked into that airport…my life has never been so complete. I hadn’t even spoken to you and was already jealous of the dude who hit on you at the baggage claim.

  “Mine. Remember that, I meant it.”

  ****

  Gah. It’s cold in here. Wait, where am I?

  ****

  “Dr. Harris, it’s been two days. Shouldn’t she at least show signs that she hears us, hand twitches, or something?” He paced along the window beside her bed and threw his hands in the air. Carol sat in the chair on the other side of the bed with her fingers laced and shoulders alert and ready.

  The doctor stood at the end of her bed, his arms crossed. “There is no way to tell. I said at least three days, remember. We will give her another twenty-four hours. If she doesn’t start to come to tomorrow, we will send her for another scan. All the pictures so far show she is on the mend, but the brain is tricky to understand.”

  “Thank you, Dr. Harris. We know you have done everything possible. It’s just a little hard to be patient.” She wandered over to Cole, wrapped him in a hug, and offered her motionless daughter a gaze filled with hope. “We will wait some more.”

  ****

  Cole? I can smell Cole. Mmmm. Mom? I’m so tired…

  ****

  “So you need to relieve me, Abby, and Taryn of this macho fest before someone gets hurt. They are so competitive.”

  Cole laughed as he played the last of the messages, again. He needed her. Every time he returned to the waiting room he shoved his phone at them, demanded they talk to her. He could tell from the eager smiles on their faces, the insistence wasn’t necessary; they could all relate. The guys poked fun at him, said even in love he still had moody days.

  He couldn’t argue, so he left the waiting room for where his strength lay, unconscious. “My love, this is tough. I don’t know what else to do. It’s been two weeks since our last night together, and those pretty blue eyes of yours filled me with so much joy. I need them back.”

  He resorted to a desperate plea to her. The rocker lifestyle, after so many years, had conditioned him. He got what he wanted, when he wanted it. And now, she needed to wake up, dammit.

  The nurse covered her with a heated blanket before she checked her vitals once again.

  ****

  Aw, it’s about time. Seriously people, turn the heat up. Cole. I can hear you, why won’t my eyes open?

  ****

  “What time is she going down for her scan?”

  “Fifteen minutes, Mr. Davies.”

  “You can’t take her sooner?” He scrubbed at his face when the nurse glared at him. Yes, he was an ass, just couldn’t stop it. Isabelle slept too well, him, not so much. A healthy glow had returned to her skin, healthy. The only tubes in her were the IV in her hand and the catheter. Now he just needed to see those beautiful blue eyes.

  He sat on the edge of the chair, again, held her hand tight. To cause her physical pain would be okay at this point, right? Heck, if it woke her, it would only be a blessing.

  Weeks out on the road with the guys held no comparison to the exhaustion that consumed him now. Through bloodshot eyes, he stared at her bed for a moment, hunched forward, and placed his forehead down beside her. He was so worn out.

  Carol stood behind him, her hand on his back. She treated him like a son. With his eyes closed, he sighed at the gentle gesture. The night before, she confided in him about her anxiety when Isabelle had left. How it faded now that she’d come to know the compassionate group of men with her and the other women. She told him she couldn’t wait to have him as a son-in-law.

  “Look.”

  She hit him on the back, startled him just as his body relaxed. He raised his head and strained to open his eyes. Her excitement stopped him mid-yawn, to follow her pointed finger. His eyes opened wider than they’d been in days. It was heaven.

  Isabelle’s fingers twitched, several times.

  She ran and got the nurse, yelling, “She’s waking, she’s waking,” the entire way. Words he’d fix to his memory, and his heart, from that point on.

  The doctor and nurses rushed to the side of the bed. They smiled.

  ****

  Geez. Where is that blanket? Mom? Cole? I’m here. Can you see me?

  ****

  “Isabelle. Sweetheart.”

  His gaze snapped up from her fingers to the doctor. He spoke with enthusiasm. About time.

  “Honey, it’s time to wake up.”

  He scowled. She’s my sweetheart pal, back off.

  “Isabelle. Come on, you have a lot of people here waiting for you to open your eyes.”

  ****

  Hello? I’m trying, jerk off.

  ****

  He shook his head, glanced down at her face, and leaned close to her ear. He chuckled. “Hello, my love. Can you please open those beautiful eyes? I’ll share my cookies with you.”

  ****

  Mmmm, cookies, and his laugh. Oh how I’ve missed you.

  ****

  “Did you see that? I really don`t want to know what you said, but it did make her smile.”

  He beamed with the thrill of hope at Carol, and then back to her. “Always about the cookies, hey?”

  A deep breath, so full, it gave him the energy of a thousand men, overruled his exhaustion. Nothing would ever be the same again. His knee bounced. He didn’t hide it.

  “Isabelle? You have a very impatient boyfriend here to see you and a whole roomful of men and women down the hall. Come back to us, honey.”

  He didn’t miss the tear that fell down Carol’s face.

  He leaned into Isabelle’s ear again and everyone gasped when her chest rose with his nearness. He didn’t want to have to resort to this, but what the hell, he was desperate. “I read your journal, baby. Mmmm, we are good together aren’t we?”

  “Nooo,” she groaned with a raspy voice.

  Cheers and claps of joy filled the room. Carol hugged the doctor and spun back to her daughter with happy tears. He closed his eyes and sat back and let his own tears fall as well, no longer concerned about being tough. She could reduce him to weakness anytime, as long she was there, alive. When he opened his eyes, he was hit in the heart, hard.

  She lay there, facing him, and stared. “You are in trouble, mister.”

  He smiled, his tears poured at the low whisper of her scratchy words. He couldn’t wipe them away fast enough. “Baby, as long as you’re here with me always, you can give me all the shit you want. I can handle it.”

  The doctor stepped up. “Why don’t you two go fill in the rest of the group while we examine her? If everything checks out, we’ll have her moved into another room, where they can all visit her. No more than two at a time, of course. She is still going to be weak and need rest.”

  Yes, they needed to know, but to leave her now seemed impossible. The corner of her mouth rose and she lifted her hand to him. He grasped it and held on tight.

  “It’s okay.” Her voice grew stronger, music to his ears.

  He kissed her, on the lips this time, without a care what others said about it. “I love you,” he whispered and kissed her again.

  “I love you, too.”

  He grinned so big, a spark only she ignited, coursed throughout his entire body. S
he said it. He touched his forehead to hers and let his eyes drift closed with relief.

  ****

  They paced. The hallway was sure to be covered in scuffmarks by the time everyone got to see her. Two at a time sucked, not conducive to his mood swings when forced to wait. He itched to be back with her, and they made fun of him. The opportunity didn’t come often enough, so he let it go for now.

  “So?” Drew smacked him on the back. “If she happens to forget she loves you, ’cause you know, amnesia, can I make a play for her?”

  He laughed and nudged him with his shoulder. “Not a chance man. She’s mine.”

  ****

  Visitors arrived daily and the girls returned to work, autographed pictures and VIP tickets in hand. Their time away from work was still spent in the hospital, and the guys were more at ease leaving her side to explore the city. She’d be there when they returned.

  He never left her side and became quite the annoyance to the nurses. He fussed over her, even had a bed brought in for him to sleep on. Carol just shook her head and said Isabelle’s father would have done the same for her.

  They talked about everything, even Alexis.

  “I’m sorry I left you. I had no idea.”

  He shrugged his shoulders. “No one did, other than the guys. That was the point, to keep her from embarrassment in the tabloids. My life is an open book most of the time. It’s hard to keep secrets with professionals, like Katherine.”

  She laughed. “She is ruthless.”

  “My dad always told me if I found the woman of my dreams, to fight for her. You weren’t getting away from me that easy. I can’t wait for you to meet him, and my brothers.”

  The pride on his face sent a warm, familiar sensation, through her body. She caught herself glancing at him often.

  How did I get so lucky? Maybe next year—wow, next year—I will go to New York with him. Maybe.

  She smiled at him. It’d been a while since she’d imagined a future for herself, but that didn’t mean she’d make nice with his ex-girlfriend just yet. His dad and brothers—that she could do.

  Her mom stayed as often as Cole, but left at nightfall to sleep in her own bed. Every time someone new stopped in to say hello, she glanced at her mom, hugging herself and happy. A sight she would never tire of.

  When she and her mom demanded time alone, Cole pouted but complied. She enjoyed the delight in her mother’s voice as she explained, in private, how the guys and girls insisted they stay until she got home.

  It took a few days before she could ask about that day. Tears streamed down her face at the pain in her mother’s voice; she didn’t like the gaps in her memory. Offers of apology for the panic she created didn’t go very far.

  At the end of the five demanded days of hospital rest by the doctor, her room was filled with cards and flowers from everyone, even her students. She didn’t see herself as that important to others, but this obvious display changed that. Cole told her every few minutes he loved her. The smile on his face when she said it back each time was priceless, as if she’d just said it for the first time.

  ****

  “She will be on bed rest for another week while at home. A nurse will check on her each day and change her bandage. I am sure the girls can help her come up with an attractive hairstyle to cover the slight scar she will have.”

  The doctor laughed. “Someone still needs to be with her at all times to monitor for signs that she needs to come back in, such as dizziness, blurred vision, and vertigo. She will continue to have mild headaches for a while but they should be nothing compared to what she suffered through before.”

  She sat in the wheelchair, and tapped her fingers with a glare at the doctor while he gave the discharge instructions to her mom and Cole, not her. She took a deep breath and smiled at Cole, who took notes with actual pen and paper.

  Many nurses, doctors, and hospital staff stood in the hallway as Cole wheeled her to the elevator. She’d beaten odds that amazed many people. He fussed over every bump and people snickered at his expense. Bedrest with him by her side sounded like the most excellent kind of heaven.

  “What’s funny, baby?”

  She extended her hand over her shoulder, to touch his. “Nothing. Just excited to get home.” Her gaze drifted to the open hospital door. Bed would be nice, too.

  “You, my darling, are trouble.” He leaned over to kiss the top of her head.

  ****

  Carol and Cole each held an arm as she eased her way through the front door to loud claps and cheers. Katherine, Taryn, Abigail, Drew, Brett, and Zander smiled, ready to pounce in with hugs. They didn’t. They each took turns and told her they loved her, even the men. Her heart swelled.

  The crowded house and enormous amount of tattooed individuals would make anyone think a wild party occurred. Nothing of the sort. They all sat and talked, just spent time together. Carol did her usual—feeding everyone until they couldn’t possibly eat anymore.

  She scanned the tiny sitting room, all the tired faces around her. Most of them stood since there were only a few spots to sit, and air mattresses littered the much larger living room on the other side of the wall. “Go to bed already, I’m fine. Cole will help me.”

  “I’m sure he will help you.”

  Carol smacked Brett, but not soon enough.

  They all hugged her again before they made their way to bed. The quiet of the room calmed her. She snuggled into the small loveseat, closed her eyes, and listened to him shuffle around the room. The sound of a zipper sparked her attention, and then he sat beside her. His scent filled her nose when he put his arm around her and huddled in closer.

  “I missed this.” He kissed the top of her head.

  “Me too.”

  She opened her eyes, and he handed her a book, her journal. “Would you like it back?”

  She grabbed it from his hands. “I still can’t believe you read it. Weren’t you ever taught a woman’s journal is sacred property?” She hugged it to her chest and glared up at him.

  “Honey, I grew up in a home full of rowdy men, remember?” He laughed. “We were only concerned about getting into a woman’s sacred property.” He squeezed her tighter when she wiggled to get away. “There’s something in there.”

  She glanced down at the book and up at him again when he nudged his chin in the direction of the book. Eyebrows raised, she opened the journal slowly and flipped through the pages until she revealed the last one, covered in his handwriting.

  Dear Diary, <—lol

  I have met her…the woman of my dreams. She is beautiful, intelligent, sassy, caring, and MINE. I never knew what to expect when I made that offer, the one that would change my life forever. Her desired experiences gave me hope that I could love in a healthy way. Although I may convince people otherwise, life isn’t easy on the road. It gets lonely. I have always dreamed of the day I’d have someone to call after a show to say I love you to—when drunk of course. That probably won’t change, Isabelle, just so you know.

  I will slur my love in a barbaric manner and always hope the next day she will forgive me for any wrongdoing. I want my knee to bounce as I, not so patiently, wait for the plane to arrive home to her.

  I want to share my love with her, with you, Isabelle. As well as my bunk, my cookies, my passion…my children. I have never felt so complete and your strength to survive only makes it clear we were meant to be.

  I only have one bucket list item—to see you walk down the aisle to me. Marry me, Isabelle? Make my bucket list complete and I will move heaven and earth to get that last item on your list complete. <—I would anyway…

  I love you. Say yes….

  Isabelle’s vision, blurred with tears, made it difficult to see Cole’s face. She scrambled for a pen and tissue from the table. She wiped her eyes and held the opened book close. Out of the corner of her eye, his knee bounced while his finger tapped his leg. Although she was done writing, she pretended to scribble and glanced up over the top of the book. When he se
emed like he’d crawl out of his skin if she didn’t hurry, she handed him the book and smiled. He glared at her. She laughed and snatched it out of his hands. “Fine then.”

  “Oh no you don’t.” He tackled her and stole the book.

  A rush of excitement filled Isabelle. She bit her lip as he read her words, or word. A smile spread across his face, one she would remember forever. Now that she had forever.

  Dear Diary,

  Yes.

  He set the book down and lowered himself to the floor in front of her. She scooted to the edge of the couch with her legs on either side of his body. He cupped her face with his hands, caressed her cheek with his thumb, and stared deep into her eyes. Like nothing in the world would compare to this moment. He guided her in for a kiss.

  With her guard no longer in place and her emotions available to him, it swept her away. The kiss grew forceful…. desperate. As if he promised to make up for the many hours they’ve spent apart. The days they’d fought against the current.

  He swayed into her. His hard shaft grazed against her already swollen nub, and she moaned. She was just as weak for him as he seemed for her. She loved him. Loved the effect they had on each other. She placed her hands on his shoulders and used just enough pressure to get the distance she needed. “The doctor said—”

  She had very little time to catch her breath before he cut her off with the smack of a playful kiss. “I know what the doctor said, baby. As long as I have forever, I can wait.”

  He wiggled his eyebrows up and down. “Just don’t be alarmed when you feel me rub up against you with a hard-on that will never go away. Get better so we can go back to your house, and I don’t have to defile you under your mother’s roof. My dick has a mind of its own. When it comes to you, I have no control.”

  She covered her inhale with her hand, embarrassed, and glanced at the open doorway to where the girls slept.

  “Don’t bother Izzy, we heard it all,” Katherine yelled from the living room on the other side of the wall. “And I’m pretty sure you’re engaged now, congrats.”

  “I’ll make celebratory drinks soon,” Taryn yelled and then giggled.