Soul on the Street

by William Roache

  CHAPTER 10

  Thinking Things Through

  ‘The more you believe, the less you know.’

  One thing that Dr Maugham told us was to think things through. This might sound obvious to some, but it was a revelation to me. Until that time I had never thought anything through. I had never thought through the army, I had never thought through any of my paranormal experiences, I had never thought through the fame and fortune, the life I was leading – I had just accepted whatever came to me and carried on.

  During the ’60s everything had been opening up. Everything had been up for grabs, as it were. After the austerity of the war years and the post-war years, suddenly there had been a lot more freedom – financial freedom, sexual freedom, freedom in thinking. And in some ways I had been of the time, and had enjoyed those freedoms, but my thinking had not developed. At a fundamental level I had always wanted to get to the heart of what life and death were all about, but I hadn’t done anything about it. Now I felt that at last I was taking the first steps on a journey of understanding. After meeting Dr Maugham I finally started to think things through.

  ‘The moment we fully and vitally realize who and what we are, we begin to build our own world, even as God builds His.’

  To do this properly, of course, you have to be aware of who you are and where you are and what is going on around you. One of the little exercises Dr Maugham set us was to spend a day watching ourselves, being an impartial observer in our own lives, just listening to what we said and what others said to us and seeing what happened to us. That was fascinating to do. When you become an independent observer, you realize that you often change when you’re with different people, become somebody else. You realize how much prattle and inconsequential chatter is part of your daily routine. How much of your life is unthinking habit. How much is absolutely automatic: get up, clean your teeth, get dressed, get in the car, go to work, have coffee, lunch, afternoon tea… How often do you make a conscious decision before you do anything? In my case, it was very, very rarely.

  As you become an observer of your own life, you also become self-aware. You may see aspects of yourself that you don’t like, aspects that are really crude. Then you can gently start to improve on those areas, maybe by swearing a bit less and drinking a bit less or whatever. There’s no need to do this harshly – you don’t need to wear a hairshirt or anything. Simple measures will be effective. And as you carry them out, you will find that you become even more self-aware. It is an ongoing process of self-improvement and in time it becomes part of you – you don’t even think about it, but it’s there, built in.

  And then you learn the truth of something else that Dr Maugham taught, which was: ‘You yourself are the greatest hindrance to finding the truth.’

  This might sound paradoxical – if we are the ones looking for the truth, how can we be our greatest hindrance? The reason is that our opinions and beliefs can often get in our way. We all tend to take beliefs and absorb them into our understanding of reality so that they become unconscious and we barely realize that we have them, let alone that they are just beliefs, not the truth. So unconscious beliefs can hinder our development – they are something that has been instilled in us, they are stepping stones but at some point in our lives they need to be challenged. In order to overcome this problem, we first have to become aware of what they are, to make them conscious. Then we can examine them and the role they play in our lives and see whether they are serving us or not. So again we have to gain greater awareness. Awareness is the key to everything and that means we should always be ready to change.

  As we become more aware, we may not only see our beliefs for what they are, but even discard them. Beliefs can be stepping stones to the truth. Whatever they are, they should be examined, thought through. If you blindly follow something without thinking it through, then you’re in trouble.

  The endeavour should really be to turn belief into knowledge. That is a gradual process and comes about by putting your beliefs to the test of experience in order to find out whether they are genuine or not. This is the way to develop your own spiritual understanding.

  It was in this process of looking at my own beliefs and prejudices that I first began to think about politics. By then I’d actually voted in several elections. It was high time I worked out where I stood and why.

  Politics had never really been discussed in our family, but my parents were natural Conservatives and voted Conservative except on one occasion when they voted Labour for some reason. I don’t remember why. There was no great political conviction in our house. There was no great religious conviction either. It seemed that there was no great conviction about anything, though it may be that my parents were simply too busy to discuss such things, as they worked jolly hard.

  When I was away in the army my father was asked to stand for the local council as a Conservative member, and he said, ‘Well, you can put me up if you like, but I’m not going to do any electioneering,’ and he didn’t, but he got elected all the same. It was a safe seat. But he wasn’t a conviction politician and he was busy enough helping people as a doctor, so he served one term, which lasted three years, and that was that. He had dutifully attended the meetings he had had to attend, but he really didn’t want to do it anymore.

  So I was of a naturally Conservative background, but I hadn’t really thought about it too much. A lot of people vote a certain way because of the environment they’re born into and grow up in, and I was like that. I’d just gone along with it. When I was growing up there’d been no indoctrination whatsoever, but there’d been no awareness either. So this was something that I started to look at.

  By this time I had already got to know some politicians through the Street and had realized that certain people categorized others according to what party they belonged to, even thinking of them as party members rather than people. I thought it was ridiculous and my first reaction was not to like the political world very much. I knew that some politicians were wonderful, idealistic people, but a lot just seemed to be careerists. It also struck me that if you were a member of a party, you would distort the truth to defend your party. The minute a label is put on you, you have a tendency to defend that label, even against the truth. It’s human nature, but I didn’t like it and it seemed to me that that was what politics tended to be. I have always had great respect for anyone who has a sincere political view – I can happily sit with fascists, communists, Labour voters, Liberals, Conservatives, whatever, and hear their views, but if they start quacking dogma or there is a confrontation, then forget it, I don’t want to know. I’m interested in discussions, not arguments.

  The ’60s were very interesting, politically. Everything was being broken down; it was a free-thinking era. At the time I was enjoying the freedom on a social level, but I wasn’t aware of all the political developments. It’s only with hindsight that I realize quite how radical it all was. During the early ’70s, when I was thinking it all through, I began to understand the issues more. And although I fully sympathized and understood the necessity for the Labour movement and the unions, and I realized how wonderful some people in that movement could be, my leanings were towards greater individual freedom. I felt it was necessary for each person to take responsibility for their actions and to bear the consequences of those actions, rather than be told what to do. Labour is too hands-on and interferes too much in our daily lives. So that led me to stay Conservative.

  I have to say, though, politics was not high on my agenda then and never has been since. Thinking it through was really enough for me. I got to know Margaret Thatcher quite well in later years and went to Downing Street and Chequers, though. I am now quite friendly with George Osborne, who is my MP, and have met David Cameron quite a few times and like what he is doing.

  As part of my search for the truth I also had a good look at astrology. Before that I would read my daily horoscope and, to my annoyance, would be affected by what I read. The reason for my annoyance was that I thought i
t had to be nonsense – how could all Taureans, from babies to old men, have the same experience on the same day? I put this to the doctor, expecting him to be dismissive of astrology, but he surprised me by saying, ‘Go and study it and have some fun with it.’

  He was always telling us to enjoy ourselves. Spiritual development should be a joy. It should never become a chore. If you’re not enjoying yourself, if everything’s hard work and you’re lashing yourself onward, you might be sorting something out, but you’re not really becoming a loving, joyous, happy person. There’s great humour in being truly spiritual, which is something that people often forget. Dr Maugham knew about it, though, and, as I have mentioned, whenever he said goodbye, he would add, ‘Enjoy yourself.’ That was lovely, because we’d often had a very serious conversation – perhaps about battling with inner difficulties or facing up to outer problems – and it was a gentle reminder to lighten up.

  I took a course with the Faculty of Astrological Studies, a highly reputable astrological college. It was a correspondence course, but I had a local tutor called Alice Back. I never met her, actually; it was all done through correspondence.

  I learned to take the date, time and place of birth and cast a chart showing the planets in their signs and houses and their aspects to each other, and then interpret it. That was initially a science, but as I improved I found that my intuition would sometimes play a part. After I’d drawn up a chart and drawn in the aspects, with different coloured inks and dotted lines or straight lines according to whether they were major or minor aspects, just by looking at it I’d get a feeling for the energy. Some charts looked gentle and harmonious and nicely balanced and some looked stark and a bit harsh. I suppose a really good astrologer would get to the point of being able to read a chart intuitively as well as intellectually.

  When I first started there were no computers and it would take me a whole evening just to draw up a chart using logarithms. At school logarithms had been a nightmare and I hadn’t seen the point of them, but now they were very, very useful. After a year of quite hard work, I passed the exam and received the certificate from the Faculty of Astrological Studies in 1976.

  One of the first charts I did, of course, was my own. I checked out the dates of 23 and 25 April and was inclined to think I was born on the 23rd, even though of course my birth certificate said the 25th. The little nursing home I was born in no longer existed, so there was no way of going back and checking the record.

  Studying my own chart helped me to understand aspects of myself. I have a Grand Trine, which means a lot of good things will come to you fairly easily, and I’ve certainly been very lucky in many things, but I also have the sun square Saturn, which is just the opposite. That means you have to earn everything you get and work hard to keep it, otherwise it’ll be taken from you. I could certainly see both of those aspects at work in my life. I could also see my Taurus sun in my love of good things and luxury, and tendency to put on weight, and my Gemini rising in my acting career. Your rising sign is the face you present to the world, the way other people see you. I also have Venus in the first house in Gemini, which would indicate a youthful appearance, and people have always commented that I have looked young for my age.

  A lot of planets are in my twelfth house, which indicates that you’ll come to things as you get older. Throughout my life I always seemed to be the last in things, to stay on a bit longer than everyone else, in almost everything I did – the Street is the perfect example. Anyway, it also means things will happen as I get older and that’s nice in one sense, as it may mean I’ve got things to look forward to – though I’m probably there now!

  Our personality, characteristics and traits are all there in our charts. I was able to establish this to my complete satisfaction. The reason behind this is that creation is swirling, moving and changing all the time, and when you’re born, you reflect the pattern of the state of creation at that moment. You are of that time. So how do you look at that time? How do you understand what you are? The best way is to look at the largest moving things that we can see in creation, which are the planets. They are essentially symbols of the energy that is around at any given moment. From ancient times, people have observed that certain planets seem to indicate certain energies and therefore patterns of behaviour – Mars is energizing, Jupiter is beneficent, and so on. So astrology is really about reading the great movement of creation.

  At one time sceptics often said that computers would prove once and for all that astrology was a fallacy. On the contrary, they have shown its validity. Large groups of people can now be studied for planetary influences and it has been found that certain planets feature strongly in certain professions. People in the armed forces will usually have Mars strongly positioned, for example, while for actors it is Jupiter – and all way beyond the laws of chance.

  We do not have to be subject to these cosmic influences, as we have free will, but it is very helpful to know about them, and to know about ourselves, in order to work in harmony with the great plan. This is how astrology should be used. It’s also worth bearing in mind that the strongest people are often those with the most difficult charts to overcome.

  Also, there are periods when our personality is affected by the position of certain planets. There are difficult times and easy times, and these can be predicted. To be forewarned is to be forearmed.

  I once had a phase when everything was hard going for me and nothing was working out, and when I looked at my chart I saw that Saturn was badly aspected to my sun. Saturn is the planet of limitation and restriction. However, I could also see when this would move away and things would get easier, so I knew I just had to take things steadily and wait for the better time.

  I have also been able to appreciate how useful synastry – the comparison of the charts of two people in a relationship – can be. This was brought home to me when I was asked to do the chart of the girlfriend of someone I knew. I had not met the girl, as she lived in Holland, and knew nothing about her. She happened to have a very striking chart, so it was possible to give a very clear description of her personality and characteristics. My friend couldn’t believe how accurate this was, and said that I was very clever. ‘No,’ I said. ‘It’s not that I’m clever, but that astrology is true.’

  Quite a few colleagues on Coronation Street also asked me to cast their charts and were impressed by their accuracy.

  Astrology should be used as a tool on our journey of understanding. What it does is inform us. Obviously, in any situation, the more information you have, the better your judgement will be. So you should use it to inform yourself, but not let it dictate to you, as some people do. You’re not governed by it. But it does help you to understand yourself and the forces around your particular situation.

  ‘The personality evolves in time. The soul evolves in eternity.’

  Astrology also helps us to see our relationship with the universe. It is impossible to look at the order in the cyclic movement of the planets and to recognize its similarity with the movement within an atom without realizing the presence of an infinite intelligence.

  And, fortunately, it is also possible to have a little fun with it. So I did manage to enjoy myself.

  Having proven to myself there was a validity in it, however, after a while I stopped using it. I don’t really know why. It’s strange to know that something has validity but not use it. I think I realized that what I really needed at that stage was to work on myself. I knew that at the end of the day astrology didn’t make the decisions. Astrology can assist you, but it won’t do anything for you. That’s up to you. So I left it for a while and carried on with my development in other ways.

  Much later, one of these was to become a director of a company which published the Lancashire Magazine, in which I now write the monthly astrology column. But more of that later. In the meantime, big changes were in store.

  CHAPTER 11

  Settling Down

  ‘Peace does not come from without but from within.’r />
  Personal failures, like my first marriage, are also lessons. What you have to do is to take the positive view of such a situation, if you can, and move forward. No good will come of looking back in regret. It is worth checking over any errors you’ve made to make sure you don’t repeat them, but then you have to look forward and go forward.

  ‘Failures are a means of learning the lessons of how to succeed.’

  I think if you have failed in one marriage and you have the chance to make a success of another, you’ve been given a great opportunity to learn. If you can make a success of the second marriage, it may be that you can do in one lifetime something that might have taken two incarnations. I don’t know. But you’ve definitely been given a second chance and you should make darn sure that you don’t make the mistakes you made the first time. I was lucky enough to be given such a chance.

  It came about because Dick Everett, the producer of Coronation Street, asked me to attend a fund-raising evening for charity in November 1972. He and his wife were members of an amateur dramatics society, the Green Room, in Wilmslow, and they were hosting an event based on the television programme Going for a Song, where antiques were brought on and you had to try and guess what they were. He asked if I would go along and take part. I was a bit busy, but I made the fatal mistake of saying, ‘If you can’t get anybody else, come back.’ Well, of course he couldn’t get anybody else and he came back and I did it. A very glamorous model called Sara Mottram brought on the antiques. Her parents were also involved with the Green Room, but I later found out that she hadn’t been very keen on being there either.