Shattered Dreams

by Linde Lean

  From his vantage point at the poolside Ryan watched Jenny, as she stood talking to Mary. She wore a layered white and blue floral, chiffon dress, with thin straps. Hell he was sure that she did not realize what a sexy sight she made.

  The chiffon dress had a thin lining, but this did not prevent the sun from highlighting Jenny’s silhouette, as the sunlight from behind her defined her full breast, round belly and beautiful legs. Ryan swallowed something that had lodged in his throat, his cheek muscles working.

  Just then Andy came running to her, and with no hesitation or regard to herself or her clothes she picked his wet body up. Hugging him to her, as he planted his kisses on her. Her wet dress now clung to her large abdomen.

  Mike stopped his conversation, when he saw that his brother was not listening to a word he was saying, Ryan’s whole attention and concentration focused on Jenny. Mike watched the play of emotions on his brother’s face. This woman was eating at him.

  “When are you going to make an honest woman of her?”

  Ryan came out of his reflection of Jenny, and startled he answered hoarsely.

  “I’ve offered, but the lady has refused me.” Not waiting for further comment from Mike he went to collect Andy from Jenny, he could see her arms straining to keep his son in place on her hip.

  “Hi, Honey, give him to me, he’s heavy.”

  Giving Andy a quick kiss she handed him over to Ryan, and then held her face up for Ryan’s light kiss on her lips.

  The guests shared in the moment as the three stood together. They made a lovely couple.

  Mike took a photo of them from his mobile phone, Mary would be able to make up a nice gift of it for Jenny and Ryan, catching his wife’s eyes, they too shared a secret.

  When Mike saw Jenny go back to the house, he assumed to change out of the wet dress, he followed her, he wanted to talk to her for some time now, and of course he had an alterative motive, they had news of their own that they wanted to share with the family which Mary stubbornly refused to do until Jenny and Ryan resolved their status quo.

  Jenny had almost reached the house, when Mike caught up with her.

  “Jenny, a moment.”

  Jenny waited for him, the pleasant smile wiped from her face, with Mike’s opening words.

  “My brother is hurting, I’m not sure that you can see it, but he does love you. No person here doubts it but you.”

  Looking back at the people at the pool, Jenny saw Ryan with Paul, but although Paul was speaking to him, Ryan was watching them.

  “My brother is a patient man, but only up to a point, how far do you want to push him. We all accepted you in the family, why won’t you let us into your life? Mary thinks of you as a sister, and you are the sister I never had, come on Jenny, give the man a break”

  Lifting her hand to Mike in an affectionate gesture, Jenny said. “I am working on it, believe me Mike I am.” She then turned away from him and walked away.

  Ryan saw this exchange and wanted to go to Jenny and Mike to find out what was going on, but he had to let her go for now as Paul cornered him to give him his final update.

  Paul confirmed that Derrick never connected Jenny with Perry. Derrick had been too selfish to take care of his brother when a terrorist bomb killed their parents. This the reason Perry ended up in the orphanage.

  But Paul had done as Ryan had instructed, and destroyed Perry’s aspirations of running for Parliament. Some very tough characters made him understand very well, that he had no political career waiting for him anywhere in the world.

  Rumor also had it that he was in any case more inclined towards men than woman. His attack on Jenny was most probably an attempt, to prove him a man.

  Ryan was further detained as other guests waylaid him. By the time he reached the house he was told that Jenny had called for a taxi, and had left.

  Ryan did not have time to confront Mike for the reason for Jenny’s hasty flight. Last time he’d hesitated it had almost cost her life. On the way to his car, he punched in the local Taxi Dispatch center on his mobile, and got her destination.

  When he arrived at the orphanage in the Cape Flats, the taxi driver was still parked in the road. When Ryan enquired, the taxi driver confirmed that Jenny had asked him not to drive into the grounds, but to wait for her there. Ryan paid him his fee, and gave him a generous tip and told him he could leave he would wait for Jenny.

  He sat in his Porsche waiting for her, some two hours later he wondered what was keeping her, but he did not want to intrude, but then doubt set in, what if she’d left via another entrance?

  Ryan did not drive into the grounds either but made his way on foot. The buildings were situated quite a distance from the gates, and there was ample parking space, why had Jenny elected to take this long walk?

  When he came into the building the coolness was a relief, an elderly lady came out of an office, as he was about to press the bell for attention.

  “I’m looking for Jenny Smith, she came here about two hours ago.”

  “And you are?” The woman enquired.

  “Ryan Barnard,” Before he could qualify the answer she said.

  “Jenny’s friend,”

  Ryan thought what an understatement.

  “How nice to meet you. Jenny usually visits us once a month; she is late with her visit this month. Usually she drives in with her car, but today, she did not want the attention it usually attracts., The kids know her car by now, and she always has something for everyone. Jenny expressed her wish just to spend some quiet time here. She wanted to have a look at her old room, and then she wanted to spend some time with the babies in the nursery. I feel I should share this with you, I get the feeling Jenny has important decisions to make, if so, then, this is the best place. Some or other time, these kids usually find their way back here. It is as if they cannot move on with their lives, until they do.”

  “I see, thank you for telling me, could I also have a tour, but I would prefer to avoid Jenny for now, I want her to have this time to herself, if we could do it discreetly.” Ryan requested.

  Walking around the dormitory, the kitchens and showers, Ryan again came to realize how he had failed Jenny. By not taking an interest in this place and by ignoring her background he had made it difficult for her to share this part of her life with him.

  She obviously had a desire to see and visit and to help the children here.

  He felt ashamed that he never considered the needs of these children before. Other institutions and Charities yes, but not this one!

  Instead of having empathy for this place, as it gave him Jenny, he’d acted as if this part of her life no longer existed. He only now comprehended that she would interpret that he was ashamed of her, and guilty of withholding something of himself. He’d only allowed her the freedom to share with him, what they now had in common, while he avoided her past.

  Ms. Botha, showed him Jenny’s old room, and told him that not much in it had changed. He also saw how little privacy the girls would have in the showers, as all the division walls around the cubicles were only about 4 foot high, thus anyone coming into the open plan shower area would have a full view of all the shower cubicles. He understood the need for it, as this made it easier to monitor any impropriety, but it gave him a better understanding as to why she was so shy and protective of her privacy.

  They then went to the nursery, Ms. Botha, confirmed that Jenny was still there, but like everything else, one could view the vast open plan area, she indicated with her finger on her lips, that they should be quiet if they were not to disturbed Jenny.

  Ryan watched as Jenny sat on an old rocking chair, holding a small baby of about three months on her lap. She fed him his formula, while gently rocking the chair.

  Ryan nodded to Ms. Botha, and they left undetected.

  “I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t mention my visit. As you noticed she’s pregnant, with my child. I hope that this visit will give her the insight she needs to accept my love and my offer of marria
ge. I’ll wait for her outside.”

  A smiling Ms. Botha, saw him to the front door.

  Jenny spent a wonderful three hours, and then went to find Ms. Botha.

  “Thank you for the visit today. I needed some quiet time and this is just what I needed. I’ll come and see the children as usual next week.”

  The two women hugged and when Jenny left the main building she put her sunglasses on, and walked to the gate. She hoped the taxi driver was still there. The first person she saw as she reached the gate was Ryan, leaning against his Porsche.

  “What are you doing here?” Ryan heard the surprise in her voice.

  “Making sure you come home.” Ryan pushed himself away from his car, and opened the car door for her. “I sent the taxi away.”

  Perplexed, Jenny allowed Ryan to help her into his car. Coming around the car he got in and gave her a warm loving smile.

  “Did you really think you could disappear for what, three hours, and think no one, much less me, would be non the wiser?”

  “At the time I was not really thinking, but no, in hindsight, I would be missed and you would be worried, sorry.” Her voice was contrite.

  “No harm done, please just don’t do it again, I don’t think my heart can stand anymore shocks.”

  Jenny smiled at him, and turned and looked out of the window at the passing countryside as they made their way home.

  Once on the freeway, Ryan made up lost time. She was in a contemplative mood and he left her to it.

  They arrived back just in time, to see most of their guest off, his family would stay for a while longer.

  Mary in the meantime was talking to Jenny, and Ryan shared with his parents and Mike where Jenny had been.

  “Jenny I ‘v seen the way Ryan looks at you, he loves you very much. Why won’t you marry him?”

  “Mary, he asked Natalie to marry him for his son’s sake why should I think I am any different?”

  “I saw Ryan with Natalie, there was no chemistry. But you and Ryan set fire to a room when you are together. You are all consuming and the rest just falls by the wayside.” Mary shared with Jenny.

  “That could just be good sex.” Jenny blushed as she said this.

  “Well, that too, but I never saw Ryan look at Natalie the way he looks at you. Even now pregnant he watches you with hungry eyes; his hunger for you to be his wife is eating at him. He doesn’t know where to go from here. So he’s just keeping the status quo. For Ryan to be in this precarious position is unusual. He is a man who is used to taking action and making decisions in a split second everyday. For his family as well as at the Company.”

  “As strong as what Reed and Mike are, there can only be one leader, and that is Ryan, it suites him and he is able to do it, but when it comes to you, well you have him floored, you have from the first day. If that is not love then I don’t know what is.”

  “How was he with Natalie when she was pregnant?”

  “Well, he was courteous and considerate, but they did not share a room, and sometimes the look he gave her, as her body filled out was almost, dare I say, it … contempt.” Seeing Jenny’s startled look, Mary nodded her head.

  Ryan, who was watching them, then came to join them.

  “Jen, my parents want to leave now.”

  Jenny, Andy and Ryan saw the last of their guest off.

  Later that night, when Andy was settled, Jenny saw the watchful looks that Ryan was giving her, but he did not elaborate, other than to say, that he would set up a Trust for her, for the Orphanage, and that he would get involved as much as she needed him. Laying with him in their big bed, she felt safe and loved in his arms.

  Ryan left before dawn on Monday morning, as he had to visit a site off the West Coast. He gently woke her with a tender kiss, so that she would know that he was leaving.

  She waited until the sound of his helicopter receded, before she turned over to snuggle into his pillow and then fell asleep again.

  Jenny spent the day at home still in her pensive mood. She had to give him her decision that evening; she had left it far too long already.

  Ryan resisted the urge to phone Jenny during the day, and it was late when he returned home. Wondering if she would still be awake, he noticed the pool lights on. There was only one person who would be in the pool at this time.

  Ryan felt his strong reaction to her in his loins, as he felt his shaft stiffen and his groin ache in anticipation of making love to her tonight. For someone who had been able to remain celibate for long periods of time, despite his high sex drive, he now found that his usual iron will and control, was mooted by his overwhelming desire for her. Once the pilot landed the helicopter on the roof, he quickly exited and ran hunched over under the still moving blades, he quickly made for the stairs.

  His stride did not slow as he negotiated the stairs, and headed for the swimming pool. Jenny had the ‘Do not disturbed/occupied’ sign on the door, and he quietly opened the door, going in he placed his bag, and laptop down on a whicker table, and hastily discarded his jacket and tie, loosening the buttons to his pink shirt he collected a bath-sheet towel before making his way to the far end of the pool.

  He stood motionless as he appraised her careful negotiation of the pool steps with a tender smile. She had no clothes on, except for a black costume G-string. As she came out of the water, she lifted her arms to wring her hair out, her full breasts rested on her burgeoning stomach, ripe with his child.

  She looked so desirable. Only then did she become aware of him, and her delight and pleasure at seeing him radiated from her.

  As she eagerly moved into his embrace, he ran his hands over her stomach and tenderly kissed her temple.

  “Hello, you.” Ryan’s greeting was especially tender.

  “Hello, you too.” Jenny whispered back.

  Bending his knees so that his body could accommodate her stomach his head descended. He captured her eager lips, his demanding kiss drew from her all she had to offer. His tongue invaded her mouth, seeking all her sensitive areas. His warm mouth caught her gasp, as his hands and body molded her to him.

  By the time they came out of their passionate embrace his shirt and pants were wet, but neither had a care for his clothing except to have him out of them as speedily as possible.

  Jenny had already undone all his shirt buttons and pulled it from his waist. His black belt was unbuckled and his black suit pants button was already loose and the zip partially undone!

  Ryan picked up her almost desperation to hold him and have him hold her as closely and tightly as possible. Looking at the loungers and the practicalities, he gave a humorous laugh.

  “I’ll have to carry you to my bed, my beauty, my size and you added proportions, will not allow us to make love comfortably here.”

  “Well then carry me away, dear Knight, but can you still carry me all the way considering my added ‘proportions’ as you so nicely put it?”

  “Honey, I can carry and take you all the way, I assure you.”

  Laughing into his green eyes, Jenny tenderly brushed his hair back from his face. “Then proceed, man of mine, proceed.”

  “A few practicalities, I do not want to share this view with any of our staff.”

  Ryan helped her dry off and took one of the robes off the rail he helped her into it. Then with one smooth and easy movement he swept her off her feet and carried her all the way to their bedroom. Her head nestled in his shoulder.

  Once there, he took her into their dressing room and gently placed her down on the couch and then dried her hair with the dryer.

  He mused that his business associates would not recognize him as an astute and ruthless businessman if they saw the gentleness in him now, which came to the fore, only for this woman.

  Once her hair was reasonably dry, he picked her up and carried her to their bed. Not once taking his lips from her body, as he took liberties with his mouth, her whispered sighs fueling his ardor.

  That night he made tender love to her, her growing
body, not distracting from his desire for her. But his lovemaking had gentled into just what she needed at this time, satisfying her own heightened sexual needs while hopefully sating her desire to feel loved and special.

  Then, just before he fell asleep, she whispered to him. “I love you, and yes I will.” She felt him still, then his husky enquiry.

  “Yes, you will … marry me?”

  Cuddling up to him, she whispered again.

  “I will marry you, yes.” Jenny then fell soundly asleep.

  He lay with her in his arms, a rueful smile on his lips, trust Jenny to choose her own time and place and then to fall asleep as if she had not just delivered the most important news that he had been so desperately waiting for.

  [Back to Table of Contents]

  Chapter Nineteen

  The next morning Jenny was woken by a call from Susan, she was ecstatic about the news, and so the day progressed with calls coming from all and sundry as Ryan informed everyone of their pending marriage.

  Later in the day a florist came to deliver the flowers Ryan had ordered, the whole house was filled with white and yellow roses, Jenny’s favorite, but he’d also sent her a single red rose, which she placed on her beside table next to their bed.

  That evening when he came home he and Andy made her feel extra special, and the two men in her life took her out to dinner. People watched the family and thought how happy the family looked, the handsome man, with his pregnant wife and son.

  Later when Andy was asleep, they were laying in their bed discussing the wedding, Ryan informed her that it must take place as quickly as it can be arranged, she just had to say what she wanted and the firm who did their Company, corporate functions would take care of the rest, Jenny told him she just wanted a small intimate wedding with the family and their best friends. Ryan said that what ever she wanted she could have.