The Suffocation of Katie

by Glenna Maynard

  “Promise me that when I’m gone you will call me, no matter what time it is, if you dream bad stuff. And if for some reason you can’t reach me or you just miss me…I want you to come get in my bed, and look at the painting hanging up above.”

  I look up at the ‘just breathe’ hanging over our heads. “I promise Kai.”

  He kisses my forehead and rubs his hand down my arm, which leads to him teasing at my panties with his fingers, and sucking on my earlobe whispering, “Want you so bad Kat.” I love it when he says those four words.

  “Take what you want Kai.” I tug on his boxer briefs eager to give him what he desires.

  He is gazing deep in my eyes as he rocks into me; I swear our souls were two lost halves made whole when we finally connected sharing our first real kiss. “I love you Kat.”

  “I love you Kai. You are the other half of my soul. So remember that when you go and get famous on me.”

  “Kat, my soul knows that it is only ever truly whole when we are together. Like this right here.” He pushes my knees down on the bed and thrusts hard and deep banging my head against the headboard. I swear I can feel him in my stomach as he makes love to me.

  Our bodies are moving together in perfect harmony as one. I swear this boy will always be a part of me no matter what happens. Kai touches me in places that only a lover could. No one will ever know my body the way he does.

  “Roll over baby,” he tells me.

  I am face down with my stomach flat against the bed. I have to turn my head to the side so I can breathe. Sweet gentle kisses and licks trail down my back slowly. It’s excruciatingly torturous and the most wonderful pleasure in one. When he reaches my rear he bites my cheeks harshly, I have to bite my lip to stop the yelp from leaving my throat. His hand comes up under my stomach and he pulls my butt up in the air. “You’re beautiful Kat.”

  Kai takes my ankles and crosses them right before he slides between my cheeks. I give him some assistance finding his way. He is teaching me so many things I never thought of trying. His hand grabs my hair tugging my head back. His lips crash into mine as he climaxes.

  An inaudible sound hisses through his clenched teeth. We collapse, lying side-by-side sweating and panting unable to breathe.

  “Fuck, Kat the things you do to me. I don’t know if I can get on that plane Monday without you.”

  “You can and you will Kai. You will put your ass on that plane for me.”

  “You make me think you are happy to be getting rid of me,” he says with a pout, reminding me of Khloe.

  “Kai I will likely feel like I am about to die, when I wake up next week and you aren’t here with me.”

  We drift to sleep promising each other that we will text as often as we can.

  ~**~

  Our Saturday is one hell of a day. I have spent most of the day hiding in my room, texting with Penny, while Kai fights with his dad over LA. I told him to wait until his mom came home, but his dad caught us in bed this morning, and Kai brought up his band to deflect Kent’s attention from me. His dad made some weird comment that Kai wasn’t going to put them through this shit again, with another girl. Only one name comes to mind—Raven. Now my head is spinning a web of scenarios wondering the full story of what happened with Raven, Kai and his brother.

  Penny: So let me get this straight. You and Kai Cooper are together together and you are living with him?!?!?!

  Me: Correct. God I love him so much Penny sometimes I can’t breathe.

  Penny: You’ve never liked anyone like ever. OMG Katie but this is Kai Cooper we are talking about!

  Me: You don’t know him like I do. He is so amazing. So tell me about this car!

  Penny: I’m so excited my dad bought me a Mustang can you believe it! It isn’t brandspankin new but it’s new to me.

  Me: I have other news but keep it DL.

  Penny: Okay pinky swear

  Me: Kai’s band is flying to LA Monday to meet with a record label!

  Penny: No way. God Katie you have all the fun. Living with your rock star boyfriend. Wait you said band…any cute single members.

  Me: Well there is Hunter and Vance I can try you introduce you soon oh and Jake but he is kinda in a thing with Raven

  Penny: Don’t be stingy you can’t keep them all to yourself and is that weird being around Kai’s ex all the time?

  Me: Sometimes…but Raven is pretty cool once you get to know her

  “Secretive but cool,” I mutter to myself.

  Me: TTYL I have to go.

  Penny: I mean it Katie hook me up I am not sitting around moping over Aaron he has wasted enough of my time!

  The house has grown quiet and I hear a door slam. Kai comes to my room a few minutes later looking exhausted and sad. “I hate fighting with my dad, but he doesn’t get it. My music is my life.” He flops down on my bed and looks over at my phone with a raised brow as he sees whom I have been chatting with. “Friends again?”

  “Yeah we worked it out.”

  “That’s good Kat. I am surprised you lasted this long without talking to her.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “Just never seen you two without each other much, always attached at the hip with Beckett. Does that mean he is back too?”

  “I don’t know Kai, but he was one of my best friends.”

  “I won’t tell you not to talk to him. He just better not try to swoop in and steal you away from me.”

  “Told you Kai. Wild horses.” He flashes his dimples with a heartbreaking smile. I say heartbreaking because he is so dang beautiful.

  “Wanna’ help me go through my song books so I know what to take on Monday?”

  “You got it.”

  I am lying on Kai’s bed going through his stack of notebooks with him. It makes me feel good that he trusts me with his most private thoughts. It makes me feel…special.

  His mom and Khloe make it home. Khloe comes running up the stairs and jumps up on the bed giving me a tackle hug.

  Kai mocks offense and says, “what about me?”

  Khloe jumps from me to Kai and he tickles her as she shrieks, rolling over his notebooks. Kelli comes and fetches Kai. His dad is waiting in the study to talk to him. He takes a deep breath as he walks slowly to the hallway. His hand is resting against the doorframe and he looks back at Khloe and me with that weird expression again.

  What are you hiding Kai Cooper?

  He smiles at me halfheartedly and goes to face his dad.

  “Okay, Khloe-bug…how about you help me put these notebooks away for Kai?”

  “No, Khloe go play.” She slides from the bed and takes off to her room. She is so rotten. I start gathering the books and stacking them back next to his desk, only leaving the ones out he needs to pull from. Kai’s phone is vibrating on his nightstand. I can’t help but look. It’s Raven.

  Raven: Kai you can’t avoid it forever. We need to talk about this.

  There it is—COMPLICATED flashing in my face. It’s as if a neon arrow is pointing at the message, begging me to respond pretending to be Kai, to see what she says, or at least read their messages and see what I can uncover. I stand here debating for nearly five minutes. I keep hoping someone will interrupt me—to stop me. My finger twitches over the screen.

  Deep breath. Stop it Katie, you are getting crazy over this boy.

  I put the phone face down. I won’t be one of those girls. I won’t get all nutty like Penny. You won’t see me spray painting shit on the side of anyone’s house.

  I throw myself face down into Kai’s pillow and muffle my frustrated scream. Rolling over I pull the pillow over my face and kick my legs out.

  “Are you okay?” My cheeks burn red. Slowly I lower the pillow and sit up. I see Kirk standing in the doorway chuckling.

  “Yup, I’m good. Perfectly fine. Nothing to see here.”

  “Must be hard?”

  “What?” Kirk Cooper…what are you getting at?

  “Being in the dark?”

  “Then shine t
he light on me,” I mouth off.

  One second Kirk is getting ready to say something back to me and the next he is ripped from the door by Kai.

  “Told you to stay away from Katie,” he seethes.

  Kirk holds his hands up. “Easy little brother was just talking to her. I live here too ya know.” He looks to me and winks while mouthing the word later. I almost laugh because the way his face scrunches when he does it is so awkward.

  “What was he saying to you?” Kai snaps at me stomping into his room and slamming the door.

  I don’t appreciate the tone he is taking with me. “Nothing really. But that reminds me Kai…Raven told me about her cheating. Why was that so hard for you to tell me? Your girlfriend cheated on you, it’s not like it’s some BIG thing. I mean, I am sure it sucked really badly. But why wouldn’t you have just told me that?”

  “Because it’s embarrassing Kat. Do we have to talk about this right now? My dad is being a real asshole. My parents are fighting. Nothing ever goes as smoothly as I want it to. And now you’re mad at me.”

  “I’m not mad at you Kai. I just want you to be able to talk to me about anything. You’re the other half of my soul remember.”

  “I’m sorry Kat. You’re right. You have shared things with me that you probably would never tell anyone. I’m a selfish prick. What can I say?”

  “Hmm…my pride got in my way and I want to get you naked and do bad things to you.” I smile as his eyes go wide.

  “Killing me Kat.”

  “That’s the plan Kai.”

  Chapter 23

  Kai’s dad reluctantly agrees to allow Kai to fly to LA as long as his mom accompanies him and he doesn’t drop out of school. They are leaving late tomorrow night and driving up to Lexington to make the flight. I volunteer myself to help with Khloe. I will be using Kai’s car to drive her to daycare Monday morning, and I will pick her up after I get out of school, and bring her home and we will be doing what we normally do on any other Monday.

  Right now, we are having an awkward ‘family’ dinner. His dad hasn’t said anything more about my being in bed with Kai this morning and I hope he doesn’t, but he keeps giving me these side glances, like he is thinking of saying something, but isn’t sure what. It is freaking me out.

  “Can we all get over the elephant in the room? The silence is killing me!” Kirk suddenly blurts out unexpectedly.

  “What would that be?” Their mom asks.

  Kent’s face is red. I just want to crawl under the table afraid that he means me.

  Kai squeezes my hand and I shrink down in my chair. Kirk grins at me and says, “You know Kai and the band getting some sort of deal. We should be celebrating!”

  “Have to actually see it on paper,” their dad says with a grunt.

  Dinner continues with us all chewing our meal slowly and no one speaking. Khloe is already in bed or I am sure she would be entertaining us.

  After that mess, I don’t escape the night without an awkward sex talk from Kai’s parents.

  They call us into the study, as we are getting ready to head to Jake’s for a small party. Kai wasn’t too thrilled when I sent Penny a text and invited her, but he will get over it. I am sure Vance and Hunter will appreciate the thought.

  I take a seat next to Kai on the small chaise. His dad is sitting on the leather sofa with his mom. “We need to discuss this morning. You two know the rules and you broke the main one. I won’t tolerate you two disrespecting our wishes. The thing is…we know you are going to have sex. I wish you would have waited, but we are past that now. I hope that you are on birth control Katie. We don’t need…” Kelli squeezes Kent’s knee. “Well you two aren’t ready for kids. You haven’t even been dating that long. So just, keep that in mind. And next time lock the damn door.”

  I just want to die right now. So embarrassing.

  We are excused and told to be home by one a.m.

  We get into Kai’s car and he says, “See that wasn’t too bad was it?”

  “I could actually be dead right now. I haven’t decided. You need to check…do I have a pulse?” I hold my wrist out to him.

  He rolls his eyes. “You are being dramatic.”

  “Your parents now know we have sex!” my tongue hisses the X.

  “Yeah they do and they have sex too. It’s a natural thing that couples do Kat.”

  “Are we done talking about your parents and sex?”

  “Can we still talk sex and just leave my parents out of it.” He cracks a smile with those dimples that own me.

  “You are horrible!” I smack his stomach. He clutches my hand in his and holds it against the top of his thigh.

  “You like it.”

  “Maybe a little,” I joke.

  We make it to Jake’s and Penny is sitting in her car waiting for us.

  “You been waiting long?”

  “Only about ten minutes. I felt weird going in alone. I don’t know anyone besides you.”

  Kai barely acknowledges Penny with a chin lift. Guess I will have to settle for him tolerating her for now. She will grow on him, eventually.

  When Penny walks in with Kai and me, Hunter and Vance jump up, nearly tripping one another, rushing over to say hello…

  A distasteful look washes over Raven’s face. Oops, I forgot to tell her we are friends again. Maybe I will take a play from her books and say it’s complicated. Vance and Hunter are practically drooling over Penny and she is loving the attention.

  Kai pulls me off to the side. “I think we should have just stayed home in my bed tonight.”

  “Don’t be a party pooper. The guys are excited Kai, and you should want to celebrate with them.”

  “I am more concerned about missing you,” he says pouting with sad eyes.

  Grabbing his mouth, I squish it between my fingers, giving him a quick peck. I turn his head towards his bandmates. “Look at them Kai. They are so damn happy. Now get your butt out there and have a good time with your friends.”

  “I like it when you get all bossy Kat.” He runs his tongue over my top lip distracting me.

  Next thing I know, he has me pushed against the wall in the corner, with his hand down my pants and his tongue down my throat.

  A pillow comes sailing across the room knocking Kai in the back of the head.

  “Get a room!” Jake shouts.

  “Want a brownie?” Vance asks Penny, holding up some gooey square.

  “Do NOT take that brownie!” Kai calls out. “You see what happens Kat. You bring a friend and Vance tries to get her high.”

  “What’s wrong with his brownie?” Penny asks us, totally clueless.

  “Wow, she really is a dumb blonde isn’t she,” Raven insults Penny and rolls her eyes.

  “Like you are so smart,” Kai fires at her.

  “Shut up Kai!” She shouts at him.

  “Well this is going nowhere fast. Kai, why don’t you guys play a song for Penny?” I suggest hoping to lighten the mood.

  Jake speaks up, “might not be such a bad idea. We need to warm up for Monday.”

  That decides it. It is really funny watching Hunter and Vance trying to one up each other in front of Penny.

  “Wow they are amazing!” Penny exclaims listening in awe.

  “I know right?” I nudge her shoulder. Raven is sitting on the other side of me still being rude.

  “I can’t believe the guys are going to LA, and we just have to sit back. I have been their manager since they first formed Cooper’s Religion. Aren’t you pissed that they didn’t want you Katie?”

  “No Raven. I’m really happy for Kai, all of them. They worked hard and they deserve this. You are still in high school, and you said yourself, you aren’t even sure if you are going with them this summer, but I guess that won’t matter when they sign a contract. Things will change. They have to do what’s best for the band.”

  Instead of saying anything more, Raven goes to the fridge to grab a beer.

  The guys stop playing and Penny jum
ps up clapping and cheering like the ultimate fan girl. Hunter and Vance are rushing back to her side, competing for her attention. I hope she puts them out of their misery soon, and picks one.

  “I thought this was a party?” Raven shouts at Jake.

  “It would be if you actually liked people, and didn’t veto everyone I wanted to invite,” he snaps at her.

  Vance pipes up, “Why don’t you take Raven upstairs and fuck her so she’ll stop being such a bitch!”

  Crickets. That is all that can be heard.

  “WHAT did YOU just say ABOUT ME?” Raven’s head turns in his direction like the damn Exorcist Movie.

  “WHAT? We were all thinking it. You are being a real downer.”

  “WHATEVER! I need to get home anyway. JAKE? Drive me home,” she orders him.

  “Yeah sure,” he says shrugging and scratching the back of his neck as she storms passed us all.

  After Jake follows her out Hunter says, “Damn I hope he drops her ass soon. She’s got a real big stick up her ass over this whole not having her manage us anymore thing.”

  “Dude, we aren’t going to have to worry about it much longer. Once we get to LA, there will be pussy everywhere and Jake will be like Raven who?” Vance says, trying to give Kai a fist bump. “Don’t leave me hanging man,” he whines, appearing wounded when Kai shakes his head.

  “You are an asshole,” Hunter says punching him.

  “Katie you gonna’ give Kai a free pussy pass?” Vance says to me.

  “Don’t need one,” Kai chimes in.

  “What is a p-pass?” Penny asks.

  “Say pussy Penny,” Vance demands with a snicker.

  Her pale skin turns crimson. “I’m good thanks.”

  “Kai is whipped, I bet Katie has a leash attached to the head of his cock to lead him around with,” Vance jokes, rolling sideways in the chair he is in, clutching his stomach laughing.

  “What’s this pussy pass you speak of Vance?” I ask calling his bluff.

  “Uh, you know, you give Kai a pass to get laid while we go on the road and stuff.”

  “Kai. Do. You. Want. A. Pussy pass?” I smile at him sweetly.

  “I already have a season pass for yours Kat,” he teases.