Only A Memory Away

by Madeline St. Claire

  She cleared her throat. “By the way, did you get any calls before you left?”

  “No. I’ll call the phone company tomorrow about turning off the service.”

  “Perhaps we could have your calls diverted here.”

  Judd shook his head. “Thanks, but I think it would be a waste of time. I don’t want to sound pessimistic, but if anyone really wants to find me, I left your address with the landlord.”

  She suddenly wondered if Judd had really been as much of a loner as circumstances seemed to indicate. He was personable and had a good sense of humor when he allowed himself to show it It seemed strange he hadn’t made at least one or two friends in the months he’d spent here; Silver Creek was a friendly little town…She realized again that the two of them were all alone here. What had been a stirring thought made her vaguely uneasy for a moment.

  Judd rose and started to clear away the plates.

  “No, let me do that,” she said, eager for something to do to shake off her unwelcome doubts. “Why don’t you sit on the back porch—it’s screened to keep the mosquitoes out—and I’ll join you in a minute.”

  He offered to help her with the dishes, but she insisted.

  It took her only a few minutes to clean up the kitchen, and by then her moment of unease was forgotten. When she went out to the porch, he was leaning against the framing, looking up into the night sky, and for a moment, Karen studied him. His profile, backlit by the moon, was strong, and powerful arms were crossed over his chest. He was so solid, so capable and clearly used to being his own master. It seemed impossible that a man such as this could be afflicted with any mental infirmity, much less total loss of memory! She wouldn’t have believed it if someone had pointed him out on the street and told her.

  “Would you like some coffee, or tea maybe?” she asked quietly.

  He turned, white teeth flashing. “No, thanks. I’m looking forward to an undisturbed night’s sleep tonight.”

  “If you’d like to retire now—”

  “No, it’s too nice out here, and I’d much rather talk for a while.”

  Karen’s stomach flip-flopped with pleasure, and she told him, “Me, too.”

  There were a couple of rickety lawn chairs, and a big, old-fashioned swing was chained to the porch rafters. Her professional conscience urged her to take one of the chairs, but another, more beguiling voice, tempted her to live dangerously. She lowered herself onto the end of the swing and crossed her ankles underneath. Her legs felt deliciously cool in shorts after wearing panty hose all day.

  Judd joined her. Her respiration quickened as he settled into the opposite corner of the swing, resting his right thigh on the seat between them so he could face her. He gently rocked the swing with his outstretched leg, then leaned back, his left hand holding the chain, and closed his eyes.

  After the heat of the day, the evening was pleasantly balmy. The flowered scent of Karen’s baby powder mixed with the ever present mountain pine to perfume the air. The resident blue jays had settled in for the night, and the only sound was the gentle throbbing of the stereo from the living room.

  “It feels good to relax,” Judd said. “I haven’t felt this at ease since…” He searched his mind, then chuckled and added, “Since I can’t remember when.”

  She wanted to tell him that his words closely mirrored her own thoughts during dinner, and that she hoped her presence had something to do with his rejuvenation, just as he was making her feel so happy, but all she said was, “It’s good to see you this way.”

  Judd looked seriously at her. “I want to thank you, Karen, for our talk this morning, and for bearing with my moods—” he stayed her as she began shaking her head in denial that he’d been a problem “—and for opening your home to me. I know you’re going to say you don’t deserve any gratitude and that you’ve just been doing your job, but letting me stay here is not, I am sure, in your job description. In short, thanks for having faith in me.”

  “It’s no big deal, really. I’m sure you would have done the same if you were me.”

  “I don’t know.” He stared into the distance. “From what I remember, the ability to trust is a rare quality these days, and not many people are willing to take the risk. I’m not sure what kind of life I led before, but I have a feeling I was pretty hardened when it came to believing in other people.”

  “Perhaps you were just solitary by nature. Some folks are.”

  “And some become that way, because of what life does to them. Perhaps it was like that for me.”

  Karen knew she should feel glad that Judd was opening up to her, finally trusting her. But she was suddenly tired of playing his caseworker. His overt masculinity had stirred the woman in her, and the night was making her long for something quite different, even forbidden, from him. He’d kissed her once before. Would he want to again?

  “Is anything wrong?” he asked abruptly.

  Had he read her mind? She wanted to tell him how much she cared about him, but she also wanted the first move to be his. In confusion all she could think to say was, “What?”

  “You were frowning just now, like I’d said the wrong thing.”

  “No, not exactly. I’m sorry.” She threw up her hands in a gesture of frustration. “I’m very glad you’re feeling better—it’s wonderful.” How could she talk around the issue? “It’s just that, well…do you think it’s possible to get tired of having a Florence Nightingale reputation?”

  Judd grinned. “Florence Nightingale, eh? Let me try to remember. Wasn’t she a perpetual spinster?”

  “I’m afraid you hit it on the head. She was every dying soldier’s sister.”

  He stretched his arm along the swing back and toyed with the shoulder of her short-sleeved blouse. “But you told me the other day you usually work with seniors, not younger men, and surely your boy-friends haven’t treated you that way?”

  “Haven’t they?” She couldn’t believe she felt comfortable enough with a man to say that.

  “That’s impossible!” He looked satisfyingly astonished.

  “Well, not all my boyfriends have treated me like a pal. There was the up-and-coming mining engineer who wanted to marry me. His plan was that, following his next promotion, we’d move to the state capital, where he could get a really high-paying job, and I would progress to a desk job and eventually become an assistant director of the state Social Services Department, so between us we could afford to live happily ever after in a five-thousand-square-foot home. Which neither of us would spend any time in, much less playing with our children, because we’d both be too busy working!”

  “Sounds like the guy needed an accountant, not a woman.”

  She liked the way he said “a woman” rather than “a wife.”

  “When I told him what social workers make in salary,” she continued, “Mark almost choked. I think he instantly regretted he’d proposed. He told me he thought all government workers were on the gravy train. I had to tell him that social workers are the paupers of state employees. I guess it’s because the legislators figure our work should be its own reward.”

  Judd knit his brows. “So, what ever became of this loser? Is he still around?”

  “Not around me, but he still lives in town—in a very large, and for this area, expensive apartment.”

  “Well, I hope his friends are properly impressed. But if you ask me, he’s an idiot.”

  Karen giggled. “You don’t even know him, so how can you say that?”

  “Because he obviously didn’t know when he had a good thing. He passed up the most attractive, sweetest woman in Silver Creek.”

  “I don’t know about the attractive part.”

  “You don’t? Surely you must know how gorgeous you are.”

  Karen just looked at him blankly. What could she say? He seemed serious, but her slightly plump, farm-girl face and figure were obvious, for all the world to see.

  “From the first time I saw you clearly, there in the diner the other afternoon, I tho
ught you were one of the most stunning women I’d ever met”

  Karen did balk at that—he must be exaggerating horribly.

  “I love your eyes,” he said, staring thoughtfully at her. “Even by moonlight, they’re a beautiful sea green. I like the way they light up when you laugh. And your hair—” he stroked the curls around her face “—is the richest auburn I can imagine.”

  “You really think so?”

  He chuckled. “Yes, of course. I’m glad you’re not a skinny rake of a fashion model. Frankly women who look like they’re starving turn me off. And those legs of yours. I swear, when you walked in the living room before dinner, I almost dropped the frying pan.”

  Karen threw back her head and laughed. At the sound, Judd’s eyes darkened with desire. He moved closer and put his hands on her shoulders, drawing her near. Eagerly Karen accepted his kiss, opening her lips when he sought entry there.

  “Mmm, you taste good,” he murmured. He made it sound as though he’d been sampling a very fine wine, and the thought made Karen’s heart thud even faster.

  “So do you,” she said as she welcomed him back to sample some more.

  As though kissing her so thoroughly weren’t enough, he deliberately spread his hands out over her upper back, the massaging pressure of his fingertips communicating his desire for her. His caress deeply aroused her, and she cried out in her mind for more, each touch of his hands, each stroke of his lips, fulfilling one craving even as he created another.

  Then his hands slid down her back to the waistline of her shorts. Her spine tingled as his fingers played there, then reversed and slowly ran up her sides. Her back stiffened in a catlike stretch of anticipation, but he stopped the upward stroke just short of her breasts.

  He feathered kisses from her mouth to the sensitive skin of her hairline, sending a shiver of pleasure down her neck and through her shoulders. When he cradled the back of her head and gently guided her cheek down to his shoulder, she nestled there and sighed.

  But her bliss was soon shadowed by a creeping doubt Her mystery man had taken her where she’d longed to go, but would she be able to keep him? Would some unexpected revelation in the days ahead make her regret her choice? Before her fears could ruin her happiness, she reminded herself that everything happened for a reason.

  Meeting Judd hadn’t been an accident, and she should have faith that everything would work out for the best. In fact, she was sure of it.

  HALF A DOZEN official vehicles idled in a crabbed line along the verge of Wheeler Grade. Red-andorange rotating lights stabbed into the inky sky, shooting weird shadows between the trees.

  Half a mile into the forest, halogen lights with battery packs were strapped to the pines. The stark white light drained color from the faces of the uniformed deputies ringing the small clearing. One of them twisted away, another held a handkerchief to his face as he watched the two men with shovels. A German shepherd panted, strained forward and broke the circle of men, then whined and cowered back to its handler.

  “Easy! That’s enough.”

  Those with the spades gladly stumbled back, wiped sweat from their foreheads and moisture from their eyes.

  A man in shirtsleeves and tie, carrying a black duffel and a flashlight, made his way through the trees.

  “Coroner, over here.”

  “What have we got?”

  “Woman in her late twenties, throat cut. Looks like she’s only been in the ground a few days.”

  Chapter Seven

  The two men wore suits, but they didn’t look like salesmen, and it wasn’t even nine o’clock in the morning yet. Karen removed her eye from the peephole and opened her front door.

  “Miss Thomas? I’m Lieutenant Rossini, and this is Deputy Talmadge. We’re from the Granite County Sheriff’s Department. Is Mr. Judd Maxwell staying with you?”

  “Yes, he’s right here.” She glanced over her shoulder down the hall to the living room. The bell had finally awakened her guest, who had declined to open up the sofa bed in favor of simply throwing a sheet and blanket over the cushions. Judd was sitting up, stretching on the couch. “Come in, please. I hope you have good news. How did you find out Judd was here?”

  “Your office gave us his home address, and the apartment manager directed us here,” the deputy said.

  Judd stood up in his sweat shorts and T-shirt as she showed the men into the room and offered them coffee.

  “No, thank you, ma’am,” Rossini said. He shook hands with Judd; the officer was of an age with Judd, but thinner, with pinched features and a sharp look. Rossini introduced his partner, a clean-cut blond fellow a few years his junior.

  “You’re detectives?” Judd said as the men took chairs and Karen and Judd sat on the rumpled sofa.

  “Yes, we’re with the investigations division of the sheriff’s department. We’d like to ask you a few questions.”

  “Have you found the people who robbed Judd?”

  Rossini pulled a pen from his inner jacket pocket. “No, I’m afraid we’re still working on that. Now, Mr. Maxwell, can you tell us where you were headed on Highway 18 last Friday evening?” He began scribbling on a small pad.

  “No. Unfortunately my memory still hasn’t returned.”

  Rossini looked up from under his brows. “You have no recollection of the events of Friday night?”

  “I have no recollection of the last thirty-three years, as far as my personal life is concerned.”

  “Since leaving the hospital, have you been able to reconstruct your movements last Friday?”

  “To a certain extent, yes. Apparently I worked my afternoon shift at Summers’ Chevron on North Main until five o’clock. I was gone from the station for two hours. Returning briefly, I spoke with my boss around seven. Where I went after that, I can’t tell you.”

  “Can’t?”

  Though to all appearances Judd was calm, Karen could tell from his stilted answers that he was uncomfortable with the questioning. She jumped in to help him out “We’ve been trying very hard to find out what happened to Judd, but it’s difficult because he was new in town and didn’t know many people.”

  Rossini wrote on the pad.

  “I have a feeling these questions aren’t related to the theft of my belongings from my car,” Judd said, looking directly at the lead detective.

  Rossini matched his stare. “That’s correct, Mr. Maxwell. Actually we’re investigating the murder of a young woman. Her body was found last night, in a shallow grave in the woods along Wheeler Grade. We don’t have a final coroner’s report, but it had been there approximately six days.”

  “A murder! But that has nothing to do with Judd!”

  Judd covered Karen’s hand. “They’re talking to anyone who was spotted in the area the night the girl died,” he explained in a low voice, then said to the investigators, “I’m sorry, gentlemen, but there’s nothing more I can tell you. My doctor, as I’m sure he’ll inform you, believes my memory will return, but it will take some time. If at any point I remember something that could be helpful, I’ll be sure to call you. Do you have a card?”

  Both men handed him one.

  “I’m sorry about the girl,” Karen said. “How, ah, how was she killed?”

  Talmadge made a face. “Her throat was cut.”

  “How awful. Was she…?” Karen wasn’t sure she wanted to ask.

  “Raped?” Rossini said matter-of-factly. “No, we don’t think so.”

  Karen shivered—the other was bad enough. They’d never had a murder so close to Silver Creek. Wheeler Grade was miles down the highway, toward Granite City, but still…

  The deputy raised his brows at Rossini, who nodded. “Thank you for your time, Miss Thomas, Mr. Maxwell. If we need to contact you, will you be here?”

  “You’ll have to ask Miss Thomas about that.”

  “Yes. Judd’s looking for a new job in town.” As soon as she said it, she wondered if she should have—the fact that he’d lost his job might make him look even more s
uspicious to these men. “He’ll be staying with me probably until then.” She reassured herself Judd’s unemployment shouldn’t make any difference; it wasn’t like he was suspected of having anything to do with the killing.

  “That is,” Judd was saying, “if I don’t wear out my welcome first.” He grinned, and though it looked natural, Karen suspected he was acting for the officers. It made her vaguely uneasy. He continued to smile amiably as they all rose and shook hands again.

  They followed the detectives to the door and watched as the men climbed into a white Taurus. It was obviously supposed to be an unmarked car, but the large aerial and the spotlight mounted on the front window frame stuck out So did the government license plate.

  Karen was about to close the door when an enormous, light blue Mercedes sedan pulled up in front.

  “Oh, darn!” She was dying to discuss the police visit with Judd, and now it would have to wait. “It’s my landlady and her husband. I hope they didn’t see the car. I forgot they were coming over this morning.”

  “I think I’ll get some coffee.”

  “Good idea.” Karen didn’t relish the idea of Mrs. Cohen, with her booming voice, being introduced to her houseguest on the front steps.

  Karen wasn’t sure if Judd would completely disappear, so she didn’t mention him as she settled the Cohens in the living room. Mrs. Cohen was in full flight, describing her gardener’s comic skirmish with the squirrels that had once again invaded the grounds of her family estate. The sleeves of her lime-greenand-lemon muumuu were flapping as she gesticulated, when Judd strolled in, cup in hand. Mrs. Cohen stopped abruptly, eyes popping.

  “Hello there.”

  Karen was surprised the older woman didn’t smack her brightly painted lips.

  “Judd, I’d like you to meet Ruth and Truman Cohen. This is a friend of mine, Judd Maxwell.”

  “No introductions are necessary. We’re already acquainted with Judd,” Mrs. Cohen declared, grasping Judd’s hand up to the wrist with her pudgy, jewel-studded fingers. “Though perhaps you don’t remember.”