Crushing Summer

by C. M. Stunich

  “So, what, you just pick names out of a hat?” I knew this wasn't true, based on what Heidi had told me, but I wanted to test Cage, see if he was being honest with me.

  “Everyone that gets chosen is chosen for a reason,” he said, eyes darkening. “I can't tell you for sure what everyone else was thinking, but I have some guesses.”

  “Me, for example?” I asked, hoping he'd have some insight on the situation. Cage sighed and shook his head.

  “I don't know, honestly. Maybe Shayla thought you knew, too.”

  “Knew what?”

  “About Tatiana's pregnancy.” My mind went straight to Heidi, and I felt sick to my stomach. No wonder she'd been acting weird the last few months. I can't even imagine how hard it must've been to keep that secret or why she'd felt the need to hide it from me in the first place. My guess was, of course, Justin Haldeman.

  I turned in my seat to look at him, narrowing my eyes as I tried to process the information he was giving me.

  “First off, how would Shayla know about that?” Cage looked down at his lap for a moment like he was trying to control his emotions and then flicked his eyes back up to the road. He sighed like he was beyond exhausted.

  “Look, it's so complicated. I don't even … ” Cage took a massive breath. “I didn't want you involved in all of this. You're a nice girl, Chloe. I like you, really. I wasn't joking about any of that.”

  “Why were you at the beach kissing Shayla last night?”

  Cage froze up, his whole body tensing, muscles going rigid. He sat frozen like that for a minute.

  “I had to get Shayla to open up to me. It didn't mean anything. She and I, weren't not together anymore.” I wondered if he was talking to me or just to himself. “She and Justin are half-siblings, and she knows all of his secrets.”

  “They're related?” I asked, thinking that the two of them could not have looked any less alike.

  “Different mothers, same father.” Casper shrugged. “Justin told Shayla that Tatiana was pregnant, but that he didn't think it was his baby. They were meeting on Sea Ridge Point that night to talk about it. But Shayla doesn't believe him. She thinks Tatiana was pregnant with my baby.”

  “She wasn't?” I asked, just because I had to see the reaction on his face.

  “I never slept with her.”

  “You sure?” I prodded. I hoped I wasn't pushing him too far, but I had to find out. I was like a bloodhound on the trail, keen in my pursuit.

  “Think I'd remember that,” he said.

  “Unless you're lying about it.” I didn't know where that came from. It just popped out of my mouth and then floated there, just like I'd said before, a stain on the edge of the universe.

  “Chloe,” Cage said and his face got all weird, like he was having trouble speaking. I watched him crack right in half, saw his facade slip away. Panic overwhelmed him then, and I seriously considered asking him to pull over. He looked like he was going to crash the car. There was a single split second there where I thought he was the killer. I really did. “Chloe,” he said again and his voice practically shattered into pieces. “I didn't want her to die. Tatiana was … I think I loved her.”

  Silence.

  I didn't know what to say to that. How do you even respond to something like that? His voice was so raw, so pure. Either he was a really good actor or he was telling me the truth. I watched as a single tear escaped his face and slid down into his lap.

  “The Committee decided on you as the Crush without my input. I was outvoted. I didn't want you as the Crush. I didn't want anyone as the Crush. But they pushed it through – Shayla, Justin, and their friends. You know Shayla's sister was Queen Bee last year, right? Everybody on the Committee belonged to her.”

  “Except for you,” I whispered, like this was the answer I'd been searching for all along.

  “Except for me,” he replied.

  One by one, the pieces of the puzzle clicked into place, and I started to realize what I was looking at. It wasn't a pretty picture. In fact, the closer I looked, the weirder it seemed to be.

  A few seconds later, I got an incoming text.

  Got a mtg w Justin. SR crzness! But it sms impt. Meet u thr?

  My chest got tight and I almost choked on my own lack of breath.

  That was Heidi speak. I translated it quickly in my head. She wouldn't go there after all that had happened, right? Right? She wasn't even in a position that she should be leaving the house.

  Got a meeting with Justin at Sea Ridge. Crazy, right? But it seems important. Meet you there?

  I texted her right back.

  No. He can come to you. Heidi, don't go, please.

  No response.

  Cage noticed me staring at my phone and wetted his lips.

  “Is everything okay?” he asked, voice still slightly husky with pain and longing, and maybe, just a little bit of guilt. I tapped the screen, my pulse fluttering faster and faster, a trapped butterfly.

  “Turn the car around, please,” I said and I thought he was going to ask for an explanation. Instead, I ended up having to brace myself as Cage swung us around in a U-turn and started booking it towards the street that would take us to the Sea Ridge exit. Somehow, he knew. He just knew. “How?” I asked him as I scrolled up and found a text from Casper.

  Where r u?

  Heading to Sea Ridge – emergency. Don't come. I'll meet u after.

  “Because,” Cage said and his voice was fragile and hollow, like glass. “I just realized something about Shayla's key ring.” I tilted my head to the side, confused. “The extra key on there, it's for a Mustang.”

  We got to Sea Ridge Beach before anyone else showed up. It wasn't a place I particularly wanted to be, but as long as I was away from the point, I'd be alright. People were arriving in droves, and the only reason we got a space at all was because Cage was the King. The crowd flowed around us, breaking like rapids on a rock. Everyone was staring, but nobody was talking to us. I wondered what that was all about.

  “I'm such an idiot,” Cage groaned as he rubbed at his forehead. “The Mustang. Justin. It was his car,” he growled. “It just wasn't him that was driving it.” I thought about Heidi and the hit and run. Shayla. It was all Shayla. It seemed so obvious now that I knew. I still had a hard time believing they were siblings, but after Cage's emotional breakdown, I was willing to believe him. Or at least trust that he believed it himself.

  “Maybe Heidi's mother won't let her come?” I thought, trying to remember if she worked on Friday nights. I used to have her schedule memorized, so I knew what nights were best so sneak out of the house on. I'd go over to Heidi's and we'd stay up all night, drag ourselves to school in the morning and sleep during class. I stood up on my tip-toes and tried to spot her cast in the crowd. She was tall, blonde, and wearing a massive white lump on her arm. She shouldn't be that hard to find. “Heidi!” I called out, just in case. My voice was swallowed almost instantly, stolen away from me in the sound of instruments being tuned on stage, in the gurgling babble of so many voices. My eyes kept moving up the point, but I didn't think she'd go there. She wasn't that naïve, right?

  Think about it, Chloe. Heidi's hormonal right now, scared, upset, and she doesn't think Justin's at all involved in this. She still loves him. If he invited her up there, she'd go. You know she would. She'd say something like, “Two murders can't happen in the same spot, same way like that, right?” And then she'd laugh. But it wasn't funny, and it was completely and utterly possible. If Shayla killed Tatiana out of jealousy – whether because of Cage or her brother, I'm not sure – then she could do the same for Heidi. I kept repeating to myself that it didn't matter, that Heidi wasn't pregnant anymore anyway, that Heidi had nothing to do with Cage. That eliminated both motives, right? Right?

  “Chloe!”

  I spun around and was horrified to find Julie waving at me from inside her brother's car. My eyes darted around the crowd, but nobody was looking that way. Yet. The outside of the vehicle was freshly washed,
and I doubted any of my peers would remember Casper's car from anyone else's, but if they realized who was inside, I was afraid a mob would break out.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked as I moved up next to the window and peeked in. Casper was staring at me with nervous his eyes, his lips tight and his fingers twitching on the steering wheel. He wasn't happy to be here either. “Remember how I said not to come?”

  “Remember how you said emergency?” he retorted, his eyes following Cage as he moved up to stand beside me. He wasn't really interested in the Alice siblings at that moment however. I could see his brain making connections he never wanted to make, coming to realizations that for him, would've probably been best left buried. “We thought you might be getting mauled by guys again or something.” I smiled, the skin around my face tight. I think my hands were shaking, too.

  “Thanks,” I said. “But this isn't about me. I'm here for Heidi. She's supposedly meeting Justin somewhere around here. I tried to call her, but she won't pick up.”

  “Heidi?” Casper asked, and I knew he was thinking about her and the baby she'd never have. Because of Shayla. It all came back to Shayla. “Is she even supposed to be leaving the house yet?” I shook my head. I didn't know, but my guess was probably not.

  “It's not a big deal,” I said, even though I wasn't sure I really believed that. This was a big deal to me. Huge. And then there was the fact that we'd figured it out, that we knew who had killed Tatiana. Obviously, we couldn't do anything on our own. The police had to be involved, but first I had to find my friend and make sure she was safe. “I'll find her and then I'll text you guys later. You shouldn't be here.”

  “I want to see the concert,” Julie blurted, putting her pale fingers on the edge of the window. I looked down at her, into her pale eyes and her sunken face. I hated to say it, but she looked even worse now than she had when I'd last seen her. She was like a doll her eyes were so big, almost out of proportion with the rest of her face, and her lips were the color of sand. She grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to the car. “Music has a way of changing things, you know? Some songs, when you hear them for the first time, they just open you up inside.” She smiled at me and I found my eyes pricking with tears. I would almost swear that she was talking about the sound I heard when I was with her brother, like a thousand birds singing in chorus. Why did someone like Julie have to be so sick when someone like Shayla was running around, the picture of health? It wasn't fair.

  “I tried to talk her out of it,” Casper said, but there was a new hollowness to his voice, too, like he couldn't bear to say no to her. I had a bad feeling that whatever had happened while she was gone had not been good. The news from the doctor less promising than they'd hoped. “She really wants to stay, but I'm not letting her out of the car.” Julie rolled her eyes and winked at me. Her wig was slipping down her forehead, but I didn't have the heart to say anything. “We can't find a parking space though. Everything's full.”

  I stood up, biting my lip and looking around. There was no way I was going to find Heidi down here. Besides, if she was actually down in the crowd, then she was relatively safe. It wasn't like Shayla could push her off anywhere down here, and there were lots of people around, not just from our school but from out of town, too. People who had nothing to do with The Assignment.

  There are times in life when you look back and you wonder why the heck did I do that? Why did I make that decision when there were so many other choices? Sometimes, things that seem crazy later just make sense at the time. I'm told everything happens for a reason. I think that's bull. Sometimes, things just happen, and you have no control over them. Sometimes you just have to live with the choices you make, hope for the best, and prepare for the worst.

  “There's parking up on Sea Ridge Point,” I said because I knew nobody would be there. Nobody goes there anymore, not after what happened to Tatiana. Technically, nobody's allowed up there either, but I knew the fence had never been completed. What was there was small anyway, easy to climb over to get a better view. There was even a single bench, still sitting alone at the edge of the cliff. “I'm afraid Heidi might meet Justin up there. We could check, and if she's not there, at least we'll have a good view of the concert.”

  “I've got to find Shayla,” Cage said, touching a hand to my arm. “I'm afraid she might be with Justin. Do you want me to come with you?” I looked into his face and saw how worried he was that I'd end up like Tatiana, that another Crush would be dashed on the rocks below. I could see it now. Some of what I was seeing in him was terror, fear that something bad would happen to someone else, and it would be his fault.

  “Are you alright with riding in Casper's car?” I asked, and he nodded. A strong breeze blew in from the ocean, hot and salty, promising a storm. I could feel it in the air, like we were walking through quicksand. I was surprised nobody else had mentioned it. It was stifling.

  “Well, hurry up!” Julie said, leaning out the window, eyes caught on the stage and the gleaming row of instruments. Or maybe she was looking at the ocean, taking it in, locking that memory down in the deepest recesses of her soul. “All the good band drama happens before the show. I want a bird's-eye view of the action.”

  I smiled, but I couldn't laugh. My nerves were too twisted and my hands felt stiff has boards, my fingers like splinter. I got in behind Julie and Cage climbed in behind Casper. He tossed me a look in the rearview mirror, green eyes absorbing my outfit, my makeup. I hoped he knew it was for him.

  “It's safe up there?” he asked, and the question was so … odd. It was a simple question, an obvious thing to ask, but it meant so much more in this context.

  “Don't stand too close to the edge,” I said and then paused, thinking of Tatiana yet again. She was like a friend I'd never met, always a part of the conversation yet never present. “And just … be really careful.”

  When we got up to Sea Ridge Point (narrowly missing being killed in a crash on that horrible road, mind you), it was obvious right from the start that we weren't alone. There were three cars parked up there. One was Heidi's, one was Justin's, and the third one is an easy guess. Shayla Arkley Harold. I didn't want it to be her. I wanted all of this crap to just go away, to go back to thinking that Tatiana had fallen off the cliff, pushed by the pressure of being the Crush. I don't know if it was an accident or not, but Shayla was there. She saw Tatiana's last moments, and she never told anyone about them.

  When I saw her leaning against the hood of her car, smirking, I felt this intense hatred inside that I'd never experienced before. It was sickening. It made me feel like I was a bad person for having it there, dark and ugly, like a nest of snakes squirming in my gut.

  Cage was the first one out of the car. He marched across the grass, calm as could be and paused next to her, watching her with sad eyes. He didn't want it to be her, either. It was easier to accept if he believed it was Justin, but Shayla?

  “Why?” Just that one word from his lips. She kept her arms crossed her chest, watching Heidi and Justin argue like it was a soap opera put on for her amusement.

  “Why, what?” Cage she asked, not even bothering to look at him. She was feigning disinterest, but the need was there in the twitch of her jaw and the slight tremble in her hands. She was crazy for him, in a bad way. I don't know how I'd missed it. I'd seen the way she looked at him on Assignment Night, the way she stared at us at The Walk, how she'd punished everyone around Cage but Cage himself.

  “Tatiana.” I'm sure she'd heard the name a million times, talked about her, shrugged it off like nothing. This time, the tone in Cage's voice actually managed to draw her attention. The breeze picked up, grabbing at her braids with greedy fingers and teasing them in the wind, so that they moved like the waves themselves. I'd never seen her look more beautiful. Or more unstable. Just like Cage had snapped in the car earlier, talking about his love for Tatiana, I saw Shayla snap. Sometimes we can only hold onto something for so long before it breaks us.

  “What?” Her word w
as a whisper, her eyes mirrors to the past. I don't know that she went up that cliff to do anything bad. I think she was just there for Justin because in her own way, she loved him, too, was trying to do right by him. It was then that I knew he really was her brother. I could just tell the way I knew Julie belonged to Casper, the way Kaitlyn belonged to me. But maybe she was saving it for later, holding that pain in and getting ready to unleash it on the world. It was already obvious she was hurting. People that are whole inside don't do the things she did at the boardwalk, the party, the car.

  I got out next, moving around the back of the car and walking as quickly as I could across the stunted grass towards my friend. There was no way in hell I was running up there.

  Beyond the fighting and the pain and the revelations, the sea glowed blue in the distance, like a jewel on the finger of the earth, a promise. I watched as Heidi's tears dripped like diamonds from her face and drifted away on the wind. The storm was still a ways off, probably wouldn't come in until late that night, but the feeling of it was there, teasing everyone and setting our nerves on fire.

  “You … how could you not tell me that?” Heidi asked, catching sight of me out of the corner of her eye. She didn't move, just stood there with her arms folded over her belly like she was trying to protect herself. “Why would you meet with me in the same spot as her? You're sick Justin, twisted.” Justin ran a hand through his white blonde hair and spun in a nervous circle. “If you had asked me nicely, I might've said yes, but you can't threaten me into doing anything.” I paused my Heidi's side, chin up, eyes zoned in on the sweat pouring down his face.

  “I don't even know why I bothered,” he said, glancing over his shoulder at his half-sister. Shayla Harold was not Queen Bee just in The Assignment. She had a way with people. I think Justin was actually scared of her. “I just don't want anyone getting the wrong idea. I'm already dealing with a lot of crap lately. But you already blabbed to your friends, so I guess I'm just screwed.” I looked between the two of them, trying to get a handle on the situation. “Everyone's going to think I killed you both because you were pregnant.”