Game On

by Cheryl Douglas

  “I always told myself that the man lucky enough to marry my daughter would have to see all of the incredible qualities I see in her. I need to know if you’re that man or not.”

  Ryan intended to ask Josh for his daughter’s hand in marriage eventually, but he didn’t expect today to be that day, given the nature of his visit. But if Josh was giving him an opportunity to earn his blessing, he intended to take a chance and pray he could convince him. “I can tell her anything and she understands. She doesn’t judge me or lecture me. She just gets me.”

  Josh lowered his head and smiled. “Go on.”

  “She makes me smile.” He smiled now, just thinking about her. “When I’m not with her, I’m counting down the hours until I see her again.”

  “Really?”

  Ryan nodded. “It’s been that way for a long time, but I was so afraid to tell her how I felt ‘cause I didn’t wanna lose the best friend I’d ever had.”

  “What made you change your mind?”

  “I realized if I didn’t step up, I was gonna lose her. She was gonna give her heart to some other guy, become his wife, have his babies, be his best friend. You don’t know what that would do to me,” he whispered, blinking back the hot burn stinging his eyes. “It would kill me.”

  Josh tapped on the face of his watch as a slow smile spread across his face. “I don’t know why the hell you’re wastin’ time with me. Hell, you had me convinced ten minutes ago.”

  Ryan stood toe to toe with Josh and he knew he’d conveyed his message loud and clear, but he still felt the need to say, “I promise I’ll take good care of her. I’ll be the man she needs, the man she deserves.”

  Josh reached out to pull him in to a fierce hug as he slapped him on the back. “I know you will, son. Now get your ass up to my cabin and convince my daughter of that.”

  ***

  Brianna pulled the down filled throw around her shoulders as she clutched a glass of white wine in her free hand and sat by the fireplace. She stared into the flames as she tried to obliterate the image that kept popping in to her mind: Ryan tangled up in the sheets with that gorgeous woman sprawled on top of him.

  She swore she’d shed enough tears when her head started pounding in protest, but just when she thought she’d earned a reprieve, a fresh wave of memories assailed her. These were the best kind of memories: Ryan’s head thrown back in laughter as he tickled her mercilessly, or the tight grip of his hand around hers as he convinced her to plunge from an airplane. The sweet smile as he watched her open a birthday present he’d spent hours scouring antique shops to find for her. The uncertainty etched on his face when he showed up at her door with a basket containing a wiggly bundle of fur. The night he’d held her in his arms as she cried over the man who’d broken her heart.

  Looking back on it now, she realized the shock of finding her roommate in bed with her boyfriend paled in comparison to what she felt when she found Ryan with that woman. The wound was so deep, the ache so intense, it stole her breath when she allowed herself to surrender to it. It was as though the life she’d known was ripped apart, like an earthquake tearing through bricks and mortar, and she was left behind to pick up the pieces. Only she didn’t have the skills or tools to repair the damage by herself.

  “Why the hell did I let myself fall in love with him?” she whispered. “Why couldn’t I have been satisfied with the way things were? At least then he’d still be in my life.” She was ashamed to admit she still wanted him in her life after the spectacle she’d witnessed last night, but a lifetime couldn’t fade away to nothingness because of one drunken mistake, no matter how much she might have wished it would.

  She couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment she’d fallen in love with Ryan, nor could she recall the moment she decided she wanted him to be her husband, but as she sat alone in the darkness of her parents’ cabin, a place filled with a lifetime of wonderful memories, she acknowledged that she would never find with another man what she had with Ryan. They had history. They knew each other’s strengths and weaknesses, hopes, dreams, fears… everything. She’d always believed intimacy was about sex, but now she knew it was so much more than that. Real intimacy, the kind she had with Ryan, was the result of years of love and laughter, tears, and shared heartache.

  A sharp rap on the door startled her, causing the wine to spill over the edge of the glass. The cabin was remote, and no one, aside from her father, knew she was here. She knew he wouldn’t tell anyone other than her mother.

  She set her glass down and reached for the poker from the fireplace before she tiptoed toward the door. Flattening her back against the wall, she peered through one of the long glass panels flanking the oak door. Ryan. Damn him!

  Throwing the door open with enough force to cause it to bounce off the iron doorstop, she glared at him. “What the hell do you want?” She gripped the poker in her hand, hopefully sending him a clear message about her intent if he took another step.

  “We need to talk,” he said, his eyes falling to her weapon of choice. “Please.”

  Perhaps if more time had passed, she’d have been able to build an impenetrable wall, but she could count the hours since she’d felt his lips on hers, his hands gliding over her body, and in spite of her rage, her body still responded to his quiet plea. “I have nothing to say to you.”

  “Then just listen.” He took a step closer, as though he was testing her.

  She took a step back, allowing him entry. “If you expect me to believe anything you-” His hands were in her hair, his mouth hungrily devouring hers before she could find the words to protest. The poker fell against the slate tiles with a loud clatter, but nothing could break the sensual web he was weaving around them.

  He walked forward, forcing her to walk backwards until he had her pinned against the wall. “You…” he whispered, his mouth trailing the column of her neck. “You’re the only woman I want.”

  She whimpered as she gripped his shoulders, trying to push him away. “You’re a liar.”

  He took her mouth again, whether to prove to her that she was the liar if she intended to deny their attraction or because he wanted to silence her protests, she didn’t know. The little voice in her head warned her against being taken in by him again, but the feel of his hands sliding under her shirt rendered her speechless, helpless, completely at his mercy.

  “I want you to go.”

  “No, you don’t.” He boosted her higher as he pinned her with his arousal. “You want me as much as I want you.”

  “What’s wrong with me?” she cried, her head falling forward, resting on his shoulder. “How can I want a man who would cheat on me?”

  He gripped her face in his large hands and the look that stole over his face was frightening in its intensity. “Listen to me, I would never, ever cheat on you. You’re the only woman I want in my bed from now on.”

  The tears spilled down her cheeks, but she couldn’t hide them from him because he refused to allow her to turn her head. “I know what I saw.”

  “You saw what Johnny wanted you to see.”

  She frowned, trying to make sense of what he was telling her. It wasn’t easy to focus with so many emotions coursing through her, demanding dominance: anger, sadness, fear, arousal, and beneath it all, a tiny glimmer of hope. “What does Johnny have to do with this?”

  He sighed as he boosted her up, folding her legs around his waist as he carried her effortlessly into the living room. He glanced at the half-empty bottle of wine on the table and raised an eyebrow at her.

  She wasn’t a drinker, but she needed something to take the edge off tonight.

  “You mind if I pour myself a glass?”

  She shrugged. “Suit yourself, but don’t get too comfortable. You won’t be staying long.”

  He scowled, but didn’t argue the point as he moved to the kitchen.

  The open concept space allowed her to watch him move freely about the kitchen, without having to ask where to find the items he was looking for. It reminded
her, yet again, how intertwined their lives were. He’d spent almost as much time here with her father and brothers as she had over the years.

  He came back in carrying a glass, another bottle of wine, and a corkscrew. Smiling at the expression on her face, he said, “I do intend to get comfortable, and trust me, I’m not drivin’ home tonight.”

  She hated his arrogant assumption, but she couldn’t deny that she had always admired his boldness. He said what he thought, acted without considering what anyone else might think of him, and rarely apologized if his actions rubbed someone the wrong way. “Then I hope you don’t mind sleeping on the couch.” There was no way he was sharing her bed tonight, not after he’d woken up just that morning in another woman’s arms.

  He sat down beside her and re-filled her half empty glass before topping up his own. “You have every right to be angry.”

  She stared past him, into the fire, unable to look him in the eye. “You have no idea how I feel.” And she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing his actions had destroyed her. She still had her pride.

  “I was an idiot to get so drunk I couldn’t drive home, but I wasn’t so drunk that I’d make love to another woman, baby. You gotta believe that.”

  She closed her eyes and bit her lip as he slid a hand into her hair, holding the back of her neck. “I know what I saw,” she whispered, trying to push the image out of her head. “There was no question about what had gone down between you two.”

  “Why? Because we were in bed together?” He set his glass down and raked a hand through his hair when she glared at him. “Okay, I know it looked bad, but-”

  “Let me ask you something,” she said, determined to give him a taste of the bitter medicine he’d forced her to swallow. “What if you’d walked in and found me in bed with another man?”

  His handsome face morphed into a frightening mask of outrage as he leaned in. His face was mere inches from hers, his voice a low rumble as he issued a warning… “Don’t.”

  Knowing that she was a fool to push him, but desperate to hurt him the way he’d hurt her, she asked, “What if I told you I hooked up with Jared after I left Whiskey’s last night? How would that make you feel?”

  His hands curled into fists on either side of her, gripping the fabric of the couch as the veins in his neck became more pronounced. “If you’re tellin’ me he laid one hand on you…”

  Brianna had seen Ryan angry before, but never like this. She inched back on the couch, almost afraid to continue baiting him. She knew he would never hurt her, but he was unpredictable. He’d been known to put his fist through a sheet of drywall in a fit of rage, and since these walls were made of wood, the wall would likely win that battle.

  “Did… he… touch… you?” he demanded, enunciating each word.

  She licked her lips, trying to decide how long she could carry on the farce. “I don’t owe you an explanation after what you did.” She crossed her arms over her chest and moved as far away from him as the small sofa would allow.

  “I’m not playin’ games here, Bri. Did you sleep with that bastard just to get even with me?”

  “I think you’d better go,” she said, swallowing her discomfort as he inched closer.

  “Like hell.” He thrust his hands into her hair as he slowly eased her back on the couch beneath him. “You’re mine. No one gets to touch you but me.”

  She cursed the tremor that moved through her at his show of possession. It irritated her that her body and her brain were so disconnected. This was the same man who’d betrayed her just last night, so how could her body still want to surrender to him? “I get it. It’s okay for you to share your body with someone else, but not me, is that it?”

  His light blue eyes pinned her. “Do you really think I could do that to you?” He pressed her open hand against his chest until she could feel his heart. “She propositioned me because Johnny told her to, but do you wanna know what I told her?”

  She did, but she was afraid to give in to hope again. “I don’t think-”

  “I told her I couldn’t because I was in love with you.”

  She would have given anything to believe him, but with the image of that woman in his arms still fresh in her mind, she knew she couldn’t. “You were in bed with her. You were-”

  “Sleepin’.” He brushed a kiss across her lips. “That’s all. Was it right? Hell no. But I swear to you, nothin’ else happened, baby. You gotta believe me.”

  “I can’t.”

  “Jared?”

  She closed her eyes as a tear left a trail on her cheek. “You can’t honestly believe I’d sleep with him again.”

  He released the breath he’d been holding and dropped his head to her chest. “I love you so much. I hate that I hurt you, that I made you doubt me, but you have to believe me when I tell you I’d never, ever cheat on you.” He kissed her neck, slowly, purposefully, knowing full well the effect it was having on her. “Let me make love to you. Let me prove to you that you’re the only woman I want, the only woman I’ll ever want.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Ryan held his breath… waiting, praying, pleading. He’d never needed anyone or anything as much as he needed her. If she told him to leave, if she insisted she never wanted to see him again, he couldn’t imagine how he would wake up tomorrow to face the first day of the rest of his life without her.

  “Thinkin’ about you with someone else…” he whispered in her ear. “It feels like I’ve died and gone to hell. There’s no escape.” He had never been more vulnerable or more scared in his life.

  “Please, don’t,” she whispered, pushing against his chest. “Don’t make this any harder than it already is.”

  “Look at me,” he said, waiting for her to comply. “Have I ever lied to you before?” She didn’t respond, so he asked, “I’ve told you things I’ve never told anyone else, Bri. Things I’m ashamed of, but I’ve never tried to sugar-coat anything, have I?”

  “No, but there’s never been this much at stake before, has there?”

  He knew she was right. Now that they’d crossed that line, there was no going back. He couldn’t be satisfied being her friend if it meant he would have to stand by and watch her fall in love with someone else one day. He’d rather sell everything he owned and move as far away from his hometown as their private jet could take him. “This is it,” he murmured in her ear. “The moment of truth. Do I stay or do I go?”

  She looked up at him, appearing as terrified as he felt. “Don’t you think I want to trust you, to believe that what you’re telling me is the truth? Just thinking about you with that... that woman is killing me.”

  He ran his lips over her neck as his hands slid beneath the thin cotton shirt she wore. “No one will ever love you the way I do, Bri. You know that.”

  “I want to believe you.” She gripped his shoulders as she tipped her neck back to allow him to continue his exploration.

  “Then believe me.” He kissed her softly, knowing he would never tire of the taste of her flavored gloss on his lips. “You can ask her, you can ask Johnny, but I want you to believe me. I need to know that you can trust what I’m tellin’ you. You know me…” He held her hand over his pounding heart as his eyes searched hers, imploring her to see through to his soul and the love in his heart, a heart that would never recover if she sent him away now. “You know that my heart belongs to you, today, tomorrow, every day for the rest of our lives, if you want it.”

  She sucked in a breath and smiled through her tears. “I think that’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me. I didn’t know you had it in you, Ry.”

  “Neither did I,” he said in all seriousness. “I didn’t know I could feel about anyone the way I do about you. Damn it, I need you in my life.”

  “When you say in your life…”

  He knew she was searching for the kind of commitment that would have terrified him less than a year ago, but today he was a different man, because of her. “I want it all, Bri. The big h
ouse with the backyard, the kids, the dogs, the mini-vans…”

  She raised an eyebrow at the latter, making him laugh.

  “Okay, you’re right. I could never drive a mini-van, but I do want all the rest of it, with you. Only you.”

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and he finally allowed himself to release the breath he’d been holding when she drew him closer. She held him in her arms a long time before she whispered, “I want that too.”

  “If you wanna wait, we will.” He peppered kisses along her check, jawline, and neck. “I don’t care how long it takes. As long as I know you’re mine, that’s the only thing that matters.”

  “I am yours,” she said quietly, running her hands through his hair as he pulled back to look her in the eye. “I don’t think I realized until tonight how long you’ve had my heart. I’ve been in love with you for a long, long time, Ryan Spencer.”

  He swallowed the lump in his throat. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.” He didn’t want to remind her about last night, but he needed to make sure she trusted him before they took this any further. “Does that mean you believe nothin’ happened with Natasha last night?”

  Her green eyes flashed in the reflection of the firelight. “So that’s her name… Natasha?”

  Knowing they hadn’t yet cleared the danger zone, he got up and spread the blanket in front of the fireplace before reaching up to offer Brianna his hand. “No way in hell I’d ever cheat on you with her or anyone else.”

  She reached for both glasses, handing him one as she joined him in front of the stone fireplace. “Why did she try to get you into bed?” she asked. “Was it all about the money? Was the power a turn on for her, or was it just because you’re too damn sexy for your own good?” She slapped his chest when she looked up and found him grinning at the veiled compliment. “I’m serious. Why’d she do it?”

  “Johnny asked her to.”