MC: Pres: Book Four

by L. Ann Marie

  “What’s to say? He’s always going to be first choice. You even slept on his side when he wasn't even fuckin here.” He says softly. He’s hurt?

  I stand up and pull my pj pants down showing him the bruise on my hip. “It hurts to sleep on this side. I told you I hurt it when we talked on the phone.”

  “Fuck. I’m sorry baby. I didn’t remember.” He runs his hands in his hair.

  “This isn’t about how I slept Ben. You were mad before that.”

  “I was jealous that you went with them yesterday. I wanted you to stay with me and you just left, then I couldn’t even touch you and you left a-fuckin-gain. You could have stayed with me last night. Danny can handle the kids alone.” I look at him. He’s serious.

  “You’re right he can. We’re a family; we do things together because we are a family. You’ve never had a problem before with our Saturday activities. I’m the mom of this family; I shouldn’t be punished because I like to spend time being a mom.”

  “Fuck! I don’t want to punish you Kate. I just got back and wanted to spend time with you.” He looks away.

  “You could have come with us. You’re a dad to the kids too. I’m not going to justify my actions to you. You’re a grown freakin man, if last night was a temper tantrum; I need to say grow the hell up. We aren’t all “Pres” and get whatever we want whenever we want it. I don't have Prospect nannies to do the mom job for me. The rest of us have obligations that we have to take care of. You said you love that I’m a good mom. If I don’t spend time with my kids what kind of mom would I be?”

  He watches me for a minute. “You think I had a temper tantrum?”

  “That’s what it feels like. You didn’t get what you wanted so you acted out. Even this morning, you’re pissed that I got up and took care of the kids.”

  “Danny should have been here. He should be helping you.” He is still mad.

  I put my hand up. “He had plenty of reasons for leaving this morning. YOU are here with me. I didn’t need it but if you were that concerned, you would have helped me. You're still pissed because you didn’t get time with me doing what you want. Open your eyes Ben. You never had a problem being part of our family before. Grow up and stop acting like a fuckin five year old.”

  “Fuck Kate. I’m not a fuckin kid. I just wanted some time with you. I don’t think it was too fuckin much to ask!” He yells causing Devan to cry.

  I go to Devan and look back at him. “But you never asked.” I walk out the door. Fuckin Men!

  Ben

  “FUCK!” I growl. All I want is a little fuckin time with her. Why is it so fuckin hard for her to understand, I just want to spend some time with her?

  I walk the fuck out and go to the Club. I see Steve's bike by Danny's. Fuckin Danny is already here. I check the meeting room no one’s here. The bar is just about empty. All the fuckin bikes are here and no one’s around. What the fuck? I hear cheering and walk toward the gym.

  This is where everyone is. Pushing my way through I see Steve and Danny sparring. Danny's face is bruised where I hit him last night. Fuck! I hit him at the bar last night. Steve throws a kick at him; he flips in the fuckin air landing behind him and sweeps Steve's legs out from under him. A cheer goes up. Steve laughs. Holy fuck! Danny puts his hand out to help him up. Steve pulls and Danny flips the other way laughing. He holds his face and bends over. The Brothers laugh. No one says a fuckin word to me. Not one fuckin acknowledgement. Steve and Danny slap each other's back then flip over the ring ropes landing on their feet outside the ring.

  The fuckin Brothers cheer again and go over to them. Danny holds his face while talking to Tiny. Tiny thinks they should spar for entertainment. Steve laughs. "No fuckin way I'm gettin in the ring with him again." Tiny cracks up. I move toward them and still don't get one fuckin acknowledgement. What the fuck? Tiny looks at me and turns around. Steve looks over his shoulder and nods at me then walks into the locker room.

  I go up to Danny, "You should have helped Kate this morning." I tell him. Tiny stands behind him. Fuckin Brothers are determined to piss me the fuck off this morning.

  "She's been taking care of them for years. I'm sure she was fine. If not, you were there." He turns to walk away. I put my hand on his shoulder and he flips the fuck around right over my fuckin head. He leans to my ear. "I'm pretty sure you don't want to do this here. If you want to talk to me, I'll meet you after church. Don't put your fuckin hands on me again. You got the only free shots at me you’re ever going to get." He walks around me and into the locker room. Tiny stands and watches me. He still hasn't acknowledged me. The Brothers that were watching walk away. What the fuck? Tiny walks out. I go to the bar and the Brothers clear the stools around me. I sit like I don't notice. Why the fuck are they shunning me?

  "Lookin a little lonely over here." Rob says.

  "Not in the mood for your fuckin intervention Rob." He didn’t add ‘Pres’.

  He sighs, "Nobody ever is. The sad thing is it always works and no one ever fuckin says thanks." He smiles. "Brothers are pissed about last night. Common room shit is common knowledge."

  "Don't give a fuck." I growl at him.

  "You should. You should see it as a serious fuckin problem. They do."

  "What the fuck? It’s between me and Danny." I look in the mirror above the bar, everyone is watching.

  "Not anymore. You made it everyone's business. If you haven't noticed not a fuckin Brother here said word one to you."

  "Why the fuck not. I'm the fuckin President."

  "He could have beat the fuck out of you but he let you take your shots. You called him out and he gave you your respect THEN you hit him. Sucker punches to his fuckin face. His fuckin face, something's wrong with the plate and you hit his face after he gave you what you wanted. Brothers are pissed because you disrespected him in the common room where he could do nothing but let it happen. You weren't acting very Presidential. Looked more like you did it knowing there's nothing he could do but let you take your shot. Everyone knows it's the only way you'd ever be able to hit him."

  "Fuck. I was just pissed and drunk. I didn't plan on hitting him. It was a fuckin drunken reaction." I look in the mirror. Fuck, I was so fuckin out of line.

  "See that's where the problem lies. You had a drunken reaction but you're Pres. He couldn't defend himself or he'd be out. Brothers don't think that's fair. If he could have, he would have wiped the fuckin floor with you. He was the bigger man and let you have yours then walked away. You already took his wife now you’re working on getting rid of him. Brothers see things a little different than you do."

  "What the fuck? She wouldn't do that. If anything she'd stay with him. The Brothers don't know fuck."

  Rob looks at me. "You're pissed because she would stay with her husband. Nothing else I said matters? You'll dig yourself deeper before you come out. I hope you still have some respect left." He walks the fuck away.

  I grab a bottle and go to the meeting room. I sit with my head in my hands. "Tiny told me Danny put you in your place. About fuckin time. Glad he used words." Steve says from the door.

  "Is every fuckin Brother going to tell me how he can wipe the fuckin floor with me?" I don't even look up.

  "Only the ones that stayed." He says chuckling.

  I look up. "Stayed?"

  "Bunch left for a ride. Beautiful day. Was considerin it myself." He smiles.

  "We have church. What the fuck?"

  "Danny saw you're still in two year old mode and left. Brothers followed. Can't blame him. Can't do nothin but take your shit or like he said last night drop the cut and move." He's watching me.

  Fuck. "He'd drop his cut? That's fuckin loyalty for you."

  "You ain't givin him a choice. He can't hit you. You're actin like a spoiled two year old. Don't get what you want; you bully the nicest kid on the playground. He can beat the fuck outta you or walk away. No other choice for him."

  "Fuck!" I slam my hands on the table. Looking at the clock we're running late. "Wh
ere are the fuckin Officers?"

  "Just Petey and Rob with Prospects here. Want to meet or call it for stupidity?"

  "I didn't call church off! Who the fuck told them they could leave?" I don't care if he can wipe the fuckin floor with me I'm gonna hit him a-fuckin-gain. Taking the Brothers for a ride without my ok? Who the fuck does he think he is?

  "Me. Thought it would save some face for you. Again, actin like a kid."

  "You? You got no fuckin right!"

  "Way I see it, I'm your only fuckin friend right now. Can push me away too or shut the fuck up, take your fuckin tiara off and listen before you fuck the rest of your life up!" He yells. Steve doesn't yell. Petey and Rob come in. Neither looks like they want to be here. Fuckin great. I sit down and wait.

  “Gotta tell you Pres, I ain’t feelin it for you today. You sittin poutin ain’t makin that better.” Petey says.

  “I didn’t ask for anyone’s fuckin opinion.” I growl at him.

  “What the fuck is your problem exactly?” Rob says.

  “I’m still fuckin Pres. Watch the way you talk to me.”

  “Gave them immunity to say what they need to. Take off the fuckin tiara. You’re a friend and brother in need right now.” Steve barks at me. I look at him wanting to punch him the fuck out. At this moment I don't give a fuck if he kills me in my fuckin sleep. Danny will probably help him.

  “So what’s crawled up your ass that you’re putting the respect you earned on the fuckin line?” Rob says like he’s fuckin bored.

  I look at them. Fuck it. “I came back from training and they left to take the kids out. Then they took them to the movies last night. Kate could have stayed home. Danny can handle them; he doesn’t need her to watch a fuckin movie. This morning she had to get up to take care of the kids because he left.”

  “You’re fuckin jealous of her spending time with her kids and taking it out on him?” Rob says shocked.

  “I just got back. She could have stayed behind. It’s not like he needed her to show the kids the bikes or to go to the fuckin movies. She just spent all fuckin week with them.” I tell him. Why is it so fuckin bad to want to see her?

  “Did they ask you to go?” Petey asks.

  “Yeah but I just got back.”

  “You hit Danny in the face in the middle of the fuckin bar because you didn’t get what you wanted when you wanted it?” Rob says. “You’re supposed to be the guy we look up to?”

  “I’m still your fuckin President.” I growl at him again.

  “No you’re fuckin not.” He yells back. “You live with Danny. He shares his fuckin house, wife, kids and life with you. He treats your son like his own and you fuckin hit him in the fuckin face, disrespecting him because you didn’t get what you wanted when you wanted it. My fuckin President would not act like a fuckin kid. My fuckin President would not keep throwing ‘I’m fuckin Pres’ in our fuckin faces. My fuckin President would have fuckin asked about his partners face and maybe even mentioned his fuckin son’s name at some point in this whole fuckin conversation!” He never takes his eyes off of me.

  I look down. “Holy fuck!” I put my head in my hands. “Holy fuck.”

  “Took you long enough. Now the fuckin tiara is off talk to us.” Steve says.

  “The last time I was away Kate was waiting for me. She reminded me it was a weekday and she planned her day accordingly. This time she had shit to do. I was pissed. I just expected her to change her plans. They were taking my fuckin kid with them and I still expected her to change her plans. I am so fuckin stupid. I should have just gone with them.” I look at them. No one is giving me anything.

  Petey grunts then asks. “What happened after, you were at the bar with two whores?”

  “I had been drinking for a couple of hours. They came up to me and I didn’t discourage it. Someone was finally paying attention to me. I let them hang on me. Danny came in and asked me to go talk to him. I was pissed. I just wanted fuckin time with Kate. He got her time though. I didn’t even think about the fuckin kids. I just swung.” I might as well tell them everything. I’m such a fuckin Pussy. “I knew he wouldn’t hit me. I didn’t expect him to take the hit though. The more he didn’t react the more pissed I was. He didn’t even shake it off. He just stood there like it didn’t faze him.”

  “There’s something wrong with his plate. I’m positive he felt it. He had to save face somehow.” Rob says softly.

  I look at him. “What’s wrong with the plate?”

  “Since I blew up the road sign he’s had problems. He’s not shy of sayin. Why don’t you know?” Steve says shaking his head.

  “I don't know. I don't really think about his stuff. Fuck. Kate said something about an appointment but I didn’t pay attention.” I run my hands through my hair.

  “Went to get advice on the relationship, opened his fuckin life to you. Takes Jessie no problem. You don’t know fuck about his son, his ability or his fuckin life. You’re in it just for Kate, it ain’t goin to work she figures it out Brother. Makes you look as bad as the Brothers think.” I can see I let him down; it’s right in his eyes. Fuck.

  “It’s not like that. I like spending time with him and Kate. I stopped taking meetings at the house. I help with everything. I even took Devan on the morning Tiny didn’t show. I love being part of the family.”

  “When it’s convenient. Soon as it ain’t played your way you throw a hissy fit and walk the fuck away from them and your own fuckin kid. You don’t know fuck about anything but what you want. Did you talk to Jessie when you were gone or just Kate?” Petey fuckin growls at me.

  Fuck, am I doing that? “I talked to him once the rest of the time I talked to Kate. I just needed to hear her voice.”

  "Whole time in Laconia and after Danny and Kate talked to all the kids even Little Ben. Every fuckin day." Steve says. I'm surprised. When did they do that? I don't think I ever talked to any one of them during that time. He nods at me. He knows. "Rich and Patches too. Always called." Fuck.

  “The relationship you’re in is just wrong then. Danny sacrificed his happiness for Kate. You sacrifice nothing for no one. Not even your son.” Rob says.

  “I want this. You’re wrong. I claimed them as much as I can right now. Him, as well as, her. I’m changing the wording so his name stays on her cut. I’m trying to do the right thing. I just fucked up again.”

  “You know Kate won’t wear your cut without his name. That’s her husband.” Petey says.

  I put my head in my hands looking at the table as if it will give me answers. “Fuck. I fucked up so bad. They’re not going to let me back in the fuckin house.”

  “Danny’s a fuck of a lot bigger than you right now. Said last night you will make the decision on whether you stay. I would have thrown your fuckin ego and ass right the fuck out.” Steve says. Petey and Rob agree.

  “Why does he want me there? He’s fuckin smarter, stronger and a fuckin better man than me. Why the fuck does he even let me in?”

  “Kate loves you.” Rob says like that’s so fuckin simple. “Danny will do anything to make her happy. I’m not sure he realized how fuckin egotistical and narcissistic you are, but Kate loves you. On top of being better than you he’s a selfless bastard.” They laugh. I don’t think it’s fuckin funny.

  “He fuckin helps me figure shit out. He’s the dominant one. I’m not narcissistic.”

  They fuckin laugh more. “How the fuck am I going to fix this?” I’m getting pissed with their laughing.

  “Could call Danny and ask for advice?” Steve says making them laugh again.

  “Fuckin Brothers. I’m serious.”

  “Do you want to be part of the whole or just you and Kate together with Danny as the fuckin nanny so your ego can fit in the bed with her?” Rob asks.

  “Fuck, I want to be part of the whole family. We’re good together.”

  Rob puts his hand on my shoulder. “You need to find a way to fix the fuckin mess you made with Danny and clue into who he is and what he does.
Wouldn’t hurt for you to learn about the kids and Rich, Patches and Tess. You need to be invested in their lives outside of the fuckin bedroom. Danny has been the same since he rejoined the Club. You never pay attention to him unless whatever he’s doing hits you over the fuckin head. Brothers look up to him because he doesn’t walk around telling everyone how good he is at anything. He just does it.”

  “You used to be that way, before you started actin like an ass, always tellin us how you’re Pres. Like we fuckin forgot.” Petey says.

  “Fuck. I am like that. I just decided I deserve whatever I want?” I look at them. They’re all nodding yes. “Fuckin hell. You have to watch me and clue me the fuck in when I’m being an ass.”

  “Ain’t a fuckin babysitter but I‘ll mention it. You change or not is up to you.” Steve tells me.

  “Danny would be a fuck of a lot better off without you throwing drama all over his fuckin life and family all the time. I’ll tell you just to stop that.” Rob says. Holy fuck he’s pissed at me.

  “I got no problem tellin you to get a fuckin clue. Stay away from the fuckin whores too.” Petey says.

  “I haven’t been with anyone but Kate. I don’t need the fuckin whores. I was fuckin drunk!”

  “Good excuse but you was drunk cause you were bein an ass!” He yells back.

  Danny walks in and everyone throws him chin. “Need to talk to Pres if you’re finished here.” He sits opposite of me. They get up and leave.

  Danny

  “You can call me Ben, Danny. I was a fuckin asshole and I know it. You did nothing to deserve what I was throwing at you.” He looks sorry. I’m not going to let it go that easy.

  “Here’s the thing Pres. I don’t know when it’s appropriate to call you whatever the fuck you want me to call you. At home I’ll call you Ben; everywhere else I’ll call you Pres. That may even the playing field and give you the comfort you’re looking for.”

  “I know I fuckin deserve everything you’re about to say but don’t let my fuck up keep this going on longer than it needs to. You made your point.” He says it softly.

  “Good. What the fuck is your beef now?”