Where I Belong (Alabama Summer)

by Daniels, J.

  I start up my truck and pull out my phone, scrolling to her last text.

  Mia: I was so unbelievably horny today. Guys are lucky. They can just tuck their erections away and go on about their day like they aren’t sporting wood. Girls can’t do that. I had to change my panties twice before lunch.

  After I reread it six times, I finally give her the response she wants.

  Me: Even a tucked erection is still obvious. Trust me. And you aren’t the only one that’s been unbelievably horny lately.

  I press send and get the fuck out of there before I do something I’ll regret. I’m only a man, God damn it. She wanted me to respond to her, so I did. I can handle dirty text messages with the girl that I’m falling in love…

  Fuck me. That’s what’s happening. I’m falling in love with Mia Corelli.

  Chapter Twelve

  Mia

  “Okay, be honest. Tell me if I’ve completely outdone myself here.” I place my hands on my hips and survey the massive amount of babysitting supplies I picked up at the store. “I’ve got chips, cookies, popcorn, ice cream, mini cupcakes that I had to get because they had little shields on them.” I stand on my toes to see the rest of my purchases better. “Organic chocolate milk, organic strawberry milk, carrot sticks, grapes, and pita chips.”

  “He’s going to freak out when he sees what you did back there. And did you just say carrot sticks?” Tessa calls out, strolling toward me from the direction of the bedrooms. “Seriously? He’s three. He’s more likely to use those as mini swords.” Her eyes widen at the sight of my purchases. “And he’s one kid. Jesus Christ, Mia. Have you ever babysat before? This is enough to feed a small army.”

  I nudge her with my elbow. “Yes, I’ve babysat before. But I didn’t know what Nolan liked, so I kind of got one of everything. Ooohhh check it out.” I reach over the bags of chips and grab the two red box rentals, holding them out for Tessa to grab. “I got Frozen and something called Mike the Knight. I figured that one was right up his alley. The little cartoon knight reminded me of Nolan, minus the dimples.”

  “Wow.” Tessa shakes her head and hands me back the movies. “You’re making a serious play, aren’t you?” She sits on the edge of the couch, smiling widely at me. My puzzled expression gets across exactly what I’m feeling, prompting her to elaborate. “You love him,” she states with a satisfactory smile.

  “Sure, yeah I love Nolan. How could you not love him?”

  Tessa had already started to shake her head as soon as I said Nolan’s name. “No, that’s not who I’m referring to.” She pauses, giving me the chance to connect the pieces on my own. It doesn’t take me long.

  I wave her off with my hand. “I do not love Ben if that’s who you’re foolishly referring to.” No. I’d know if I loved Ben. I want to bang his back out, but that’s not love.

  “It is, and you do. Or you’re at least open to loving him now. You’re not just trying to impress my nephew with all of this.” She motions toward my snack pile. “And you’re desperately trying to pull him out of the friend zone he so stupidly put you two in. How many slutty text messages have you sent him?” she teases.

  Tessa and I never keep secrets from each other. Hell, she was the one who suggested the scandalous text message idea after I told her that I wanted Ben to see me as more than a friend. She predicted he’d drop everything and come at me hard after the first one I sent. But no, I’m either really bad at getting someone hot with my words or he’s completely immune to them. I cover my eyes with my hand and grunt my frustration. “Not enough apparently. I threw my best stuff at him and he barely flinched.” I drop my hand and look at her. “I’m running out of ways to spell this out for him.”

  She stands up and walks over toward the sliding glass door. “Get naked. That’ll definitely spell it out.” She waves and smiles at what I assume is Nolan. “Don’t tell my brother about the pregnancy, okay?”

  I walk up to her, putting her hand in mine. Nolan is in Ben’s arms, swinging his sword in the air as they walk around the pool. “It’s your news to tell, not mine. And the first person that needs to know about it is Luke.”

  After the initial shock of the possible pregnancy sank in the other night, Tessa and I stayed up for hours talking about it. She was scared, but she was also really happy about having a baby with Luke. The only problem was the two of them weren’t supposed to be serious. And throwing a baby into the mix would definitely change that.

  She sighs heavily. “I’ll tell him. I’m just waiting for the right time.”

  “Like tonight?” I ask, smiling at Nolan’s face as it comes inching closer to the glass. Tessa shrugs her response. “You can do it. You know he cares about you. And if you need me, I’ll be right here.” She leans her head on my shoulder as the boys come up to the door, sliding it open.

  “Hey,” Ben greets me with a smile as he steps inside the house, placing Nolan on his feet. I am once again stunned into silence from the sight of him in his uniform, unable to give him anything besides a goofy grin at the moment. But my God, he makes that uniform look downright sinful. I’m tempted to go commit a major felony in hopes that he’ll pat me down or better yet, strip search me. Nolan runs right at me, wrapping his arms around my legs and snapping me out of my lustful thoughts. “He’s a little excited. The maniac wouldn’t even take a nap today because he was too wound up to come over here.”

  I laugh and rub Nolan’s head, seeing him lift his face to me. “I couldn’t take a nap either.” I bend down and put us face to face, dropping my smile and trying to stay serious. “I tried to take a nap, but there were all these dragons in my bedroom.” His eyes immediately twinkle with interest, doubling in size. “They might still be back there. Can you go check it out for me?”

  “Yeah!” he yells with pure excitement, his little legs quickly taking him down the hallway.

  Tessa nudges Ben’s shoulder, barely moving him an inch. He smirks at her and she smirks right back before looking over at me. “I’ll see you tomorrow sometime.” She gives me a knowing look and motions with her head toward Ben without him noticing. Get naked, she mouths, earning herself a stern look from me before she walks out the door. I will definitely not be getting naked unless Ben undresses me, and at the rate we’re going, I don’t see that happening any time soon.

  “Here’s all his stuff.” Ben drops the duffle bag that is on his shoulder onto the couch, opening the zipper. “Pajamas, toothbrush, a few books that he likes me to read to him before he falls asleep, and this.” He pulls out a stuffed dragon that looks well loved. It’s worn and frayed at the edges. “He can’t go to bed without this, but don’t give it to him before bedtime because he’ll take it everywhere and I’m afraid he’ll spill something on it and I won’t be able to wash it. If something happens to this thing, I’m completely screwed.”

  I laugh and watch him stuff it back into the bag. “What time is bedtime?”

  “Between 8:00 p.m. and 8:30 p.m. He might pass out before then though since he’s running on no nap.” Ben turns his head and glances over at the kitchen counter. “Wow. You are definitely prepared.” He smiles at me with a teasing look. “Expecting more children?”

  I shove his massive shoulder and move past him. “Oh ha-ha. This isn’t all just for Nolan. I’ve been known to put away a massive amount of snacks when I’m entertaining.”

  “Take that! Leave Pwincess Mia alone!”

  Ben and I both turn our heads. “What is he doing in there?” he asks. I shrug with a sly smile and he narrows his eyes at me. “Well now I’m curious.” I follow him down the hallway, knowing exactly what I am going to see when I look into my bedroom. I didn’t just go grocery shopping today.

  “Daddy. Look at all these dwagons!” Nolan is swinging his sword at the inflatable dragons that surround my bed. They range in size, some are as small as his stuffed animal and others are bigger than him. “I’m gonna kiwl dem all!”

  I cover my mouth with my hand and chuckle next to Ben, feeling his
eyes on me. “Where did you get all these?”

  “The party store in town. They have everything there.” I watch Nolan bop one of the larger dragons in the head. He seems to be enjoying himself immensely. “Totally worth the twenty bucks.”

  “God, you’re incredible.” Our eyes lock and I see how much he means what he’s just said. That is definitely one quality he has that I absolutely love. Ben is honest, completely authentic when he speaks to me. I never doubt anything he’s ever said and I know I never will. Of course, I’m sure he means I’m incredible in a friendly sort of way since he’s not pinning me up against a wall.

  We stare at each other while Nolan continues slaying the dragons in front of us. His gray eyes are bright and filled with adoration. It is the look I want Ben to reserve just for me. The look he’s given me several times before. At the dam, standing in his parents’ living room after we discovered each other by the pool, and in his truck. It’s the look that teeters us on the edge of the friend zone, because I’ve never been looked at by a friend this way before. I want Ben to say something else to me. I want to hear more of his honesty, and for a split second, it looks like he is going to give me what I want. But instead, he breaks our connection and glances down at his watch. “I gotta go.” He looks at me again with the same tender gaze. “I probably won’t be back until close to 12:30 a.m., but if you need anything, just call me.”

  I place my hand on his arm and squeeze it gently. “We’ll be fine. Go arrest some bad guys, Officer Kelly.” My voice doesn’t waver at his title, but I can’t deny the rush of adrenaline that spikes through me when I say it. I wink at him and move into the bedroom, scooping up a few smaller dragons. Nolan looks at me and beams as I sit on the edge of the bed, watching him slay the biggest dragon in the room. I laugh at him and turn my head, hoping to see Ben standing there, but he is gone. And I know that I shouldn’t feel disappointed because I will see him later on tonight but I can’t help it. At least I have one Kelly boy to keep me company while I think about another one.

  Nolan was like this tiny ball of energy that seemed to recharge the more he moved around. I’d never seen a kid go from one activity to another with such gusto. After he slayed dragons for a good hour, he had a snack and wanted to watch his Mike the Knight DVD. But he didn’t sit still during that. He jumped around in front of the couch and swung his tiny sword in the air, mimicking the movements on the screen. We colored a few pictures, made a fort out of the extra bed sheets I found in the closet, and blew bubbles on the back patio. I saw his first yawn, the only indication he’d given me all night that he was slowing down, at 8:20 p.m. After changing him into his pajamas, I brushed his teeth and grabbed the books out of the duffle bag.

  He settles under the covers in one of the spare bedrooms, holding his stuffed dragon in a death grip. “Wead that one fiwst,” he says in a sleepy voice, pointing toward a book about trucks. I prop against the headboard and hold the book out in my lap, reading in a soft voice. He closes his eyes when I am halfway through it, but I finish it anyway. After giving him a kiss on his forehead, I quietly exit the bedroom and plop down on the couch with my phone.

  Me: Little knight is down for the count. Slaying thirty seven dragons takes a lot out of a three-year-old.

  I turn off the Mike the Knight DVD that is still playing and change the channel to something I am interested in. My phone beeps as I lie back on the sofa, but it isn’t a text from the person I am dying to talk to, and see for that matter. This is the first time I grunt at the sight of this particular name on my screen.

  Tessa: I haven’t told him yet and I don’t know if I’m going to. What if he freaks out and ends it? What if he wants me to abort the baby? I’d never do that, but isn’t it his decision as much as mine? We’ve had sex three times since I got over here and I don’t even know if that’s good for my current situation.

  Me: First of all, why isn’t he at work with Ben? Secondly, you freaking out is definitely not good for the baby, so calm down please. And third, do you really think Luke is the type of guy to ditch his pregnant girlfriend? I’ve only been around him a few times and I know he isn’t like that.

  Tessa: I’m not his girlfriend! I don’t know what the hell I am, but he’s never labeled me as that. Fuck buddy seems more appropriate.

  Tessa: Ben is riding solo tonight. They don’t always patrol together.

  I chuckle and prop a pillow under my head.

  Me: Just grow a pair and tell him. And I say that in my best Tessa style voice because you know that’s exactly what you’d be saying to me. :)

  Tessa: Speaking of growing a pair…

  Me: Shut up.

  Tessa: Just saying, bitch.

  I know exactly what she is getting at. Grow a pair. Please. I told Ben that I’m in danger of causing permanent damage to my hand from excessive masturbation and I need to grow a pair? I turn onto my side and tuck one hand underneath my head. My phone beeps again and this time, I can’t contain the smile that spreads across my face.

  Ben: I can’t wait to hear all about it. See ya in a few hours.

  I look at the time on my phone. Three hours and forty three minutes to be exact. Not that I’m counting.

  **

  “Mia? Mia, hey, wake up.”

  “Hmm?” My eyes slowly open and Ben’s face comes into view. “Oh, hey. Sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” I roll over onto my back and stretch my arms over my head, seeing Ben’s eyes drop to my body and widen before he quickly turns away from me. And I mean quickly, as in he can’t get me out of his sight fast enough. I furrow my brows. “What? What is it?”

  He clears his throat as I sit up, still completely oblivious to whatever it is that’s making him react to me this way. He stays facing the kitchen, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. “You might want to put something on. Your…breasts are really noticeable in that top.”

  Breasts? Oh, how formal.

  I glance down quickly, seeing my erect nipples poking through my sheer tank. But I’m not embarrassed at all. I’m irritated. Really irritated all of a sudden. My boobs are making him uncomfortable? Well, that’s just great. I stand up with a clenched jaw and walk past him, grabbing the hoodie I had taken off earlier and slipping it over my head. “Christ, Ben. You act like you haven’t seen them before or sucked them for that matter.” I snap my head in his direction and see the shock on his face. “They’re just tits.”

  “They’re your tits,” he states, his expression toughening and his voice edgy. The sight of my chest weeks ago would’ve provoked an entirely different reaction out of him. Now he’s desensitized to it. Awesome.

  I ignore the stare he is giving me and refuse to let go of my annoyance. This is maddening. “And my tits make you uncomfortable. But I guess they should, considering how friendly you and I have become.” I grab Nolan’s books and shove them into his duffle bag.

  “What is that supposed to mean?” he asks, but I ignore him. I’m too focused on getting his shit together so he can leave.

  “Here. He was great. Didn’t give me a bit of trouble.” I thrust the duffle bag into his chest, stalking past him and grabbing my phone. “My tits and I are going to bed before we freak you out even more.” I don’t turn back around as I walk toward my bedroom. I don’t want to see if my words affect him, especially since my body apparently doesn’t anymore. What the fuck? My boobs that he couldn’t get enough of weeks ago are now being held hostage in his stupid friend zone against their will. And they are not happy about it one bit.

  Join the club.

  I rip my hoodie off and throw it in the corner of my room with a grunt. I’m annoyed, hurt, and really horny. Three emotions that are pissing me off at the moment. I grab my phone to respond to Tessa’s last text message.

  Me: Your brother infuriates me! I’m turned on, pissed off, and sick of this stupid friend zone. I can’t be friends with someone that brings me to orgasm in my dreams every night. And I’m tired of getting off on the memory of Ben. Oh, and your get n
aked idea wouldn’t have worked. My tits were just on display for him and he acted offended by them.

  I press send and throw my phone down, reaching up and undoing the hair tie that is securing my hair in a loose bun. Just as my hair falls down my back, my bedroom door swings open and Ben stands in the doorway with that blazing look of his that leaves scorch marks on my skin. But right now, it doesn’t have that effect on me. Right now, it makes me want to punch him right in the throat.

  “I’m really not in the mood to talk right now.”

  He steps into the room and closes the door behind him. “Did you mean what you just sent me?”

  I furrow my brow into a tight line. “What are you talking about? What do you mean what I just sent you?” I stand up off the bed and glare at him. I’m still mad, pissed even, but now I’m confused as hell. And then I see it, the cell phone he’s gripping and a panic surges through my system. My legs feel weak underneath me and my chest feels so tight it’s as if I’m breathing through a straw. I grab my phone and scroll to the text that I thought I sent to Tessa. But I didn’t send it to Tessa. I lift my eyes and watch as Ben reaches behind him and locks the door, never taking his bright eyes off me. I toss my phone back onto the bed and take a deep breath before responding. “Yes. I meant it.” My answer is firm and definite. This is not the time to half ass anything. He’s giving me an opportunity and I’m taking it.

  He smiles that cocky grin that drives me insane. “Do you want me, baby?”

  I nod.

  “No, I need to hear you say it. I’ll give you whatever you want, Mia. But I won’t risk misinterpreting what I’ve just read. Tell me exactly what you want.” He stops right in front of me, keeping his body inches from mine. He’s so close to me right now it’s almost unbearable. I know exactly what I want. Him. And I’m not above being forward with him right now. I understand his hesitation. He doesn’t want to take this somewhere and not be positive that I want to go with him. But he doesn’t know I’d follow him anywhere. Anywhere.