Love at First Hate

by Muriel Garcia

  “He’s going to jump you, and if he doesn’t, something is wrong with him!” She claps excitedly.

  “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I don’t want to get in his pants straightaway; well, I do, but you know what I mean.”

  “I know. I like that about you, even though you want him, you’re not going to make him go further than he’s really ready for.”

  “Of course not, who do you think I am?” I scoff.

  “I know, but you know what I mean. You could just get carried away and start making out and just get to that point.”

  “It’ll be hard to resist copping a feel, but I’ll play nice.” I chuckle.

  “I know you will. I’ll let you get dressed and go pinch some of your food in the fridge. I’m starving and just thinking about Panzano has made me hungry.” She groans and walks out of my room.

  I get dressed and make sure everything is perfectly in place and how I want it to be. I look at myself in my full-length mirror, and I’m rather pleased with what I see. I’m not conceited well, maybe I am, but I look fine. I’d hit on myself if I could.

  I join Haven downstairs who stole one of my peanut butter ice cream sandwiches. She grins innocently and hurries outside to my car. I’m dropping her back at home before driving to Panzano.

  The anticipation is making my heart beat faster. I don’t remember the last time I’ve felt this way.

  Just as I’m locking the door, Nate comes out of his house, looking dashing. He’s wearing black jeans, tighter than usual, his trademark flannel shirt, and a leather jacket. I’d rather have him out of his clothes, but all in due time.

  I wave at him as we both get in our respective cars. He doesn’t let on anything that he knows he’s meeting me, and it makes it all the more exciting and very promising for tonight. I wonder if he knows that I know. I can’t wait to see his face when he realizes I did, in fact, know it was him all along.

  I just hope he’s not going to get scared and run away.

  Patience isn’t my strong suit. I don’t have much of it as it is, but having to wait for Matt to show up is proving to be harder than I thought. What if he’s not going to show up? Would he at least message me if that were the case? What is he going to think when he sees me? Besides the fact that he openly told me that he joined this app and was still on it, would he suspect at all that it’s me? The longer I have to wait, the more questions invade my mind.

  Whenever someone walks into the restaurant, I look up to check if it’s Matt. I’m not directly by the door, but I have a clear view of it. I wonder if he’ll look around and try to find someone who looks like they are waiting for their date.

  I don’t have to wait much longer. Matt walks in and scans the restaurant. He talks for a second with the hostess and comes straight to me. He sits across from me and looks at me with a smug grin plastered on his face.

  “Hey, Tattooedsoldier81.” He looks at me, rather proud of himself, waiting for me to say something.

  “You knew?” I ask surprised.

  “Yes.”

  “And you came?”

  “Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

  “I don’t know. How did you know?” I blow out a breath.

  “Your tats gave you away.” He chuckles.

  “Oh.” I kinda feel stupid now.

  “It’s alright, I’m flattered.” He reaches over and strokes my hand with his thumb. I let him, but I can’t help glancing around.

  “Relax. I’m not going to jump on you, at least not in here.” He winks at me.

  “Good to know. What did you think when I messaged you then since you knew it was me?”

  “I was intrigued as to why you joined the app and messaged me on there instead of just asking.”

  “Can I take your order?” The waitress comes over. I’m glad that she did. I’m not sure if I was ready to answer his question.

  “I’ll have a beer,” I tell her and scan the menu.

  “I’ll have a glass of red wine.” Matt shoots his dashing smile at her.

  “Did you make a choice already on what you want to eat?”

  “I’ll have the lasagna,” I say after quickly scanning the menu. This is the only dish I know I’ll like. The other ones are way too fancy to my liking.

  “I’ll have the asparagus and prosciutto risotto please.” Matt smiles looking up from his menu.

  “I’ll bring you your drinks and breadsticks in a minute.” The waitress smiles and walks away with the menus.

  “Back to the matter at hand, why?” Matt looks at me amused.

  “I guess it was just easier to ask you out and face rejection if you didn’t know it was me?” I’m not sure I make much sense right now.

  “I thought I was clear when I hinted about us being together, with my flirting, with the quick kiss…” he lets his words linger.

  “You did, I guess I’m just not used to all of this. It’s still all new to me and confusing.”

  “How is it confusing? Surely you’ve had women hit on you and want to be with you?”

  “Not that many.” I shrug.

  “They are stupid then.” He chuckles.

  “Or maybe I’m just not going out often, or if I do, I’m in the company of another woman. I’ve been trying to stay away from relationships as much as I could for the longest time. I don’t want kids nor ever wanted to get married.”

  “What made you feel that way?” he asks sounding intrigued.

  “It dates back to a few years. A girl I was fucking on the regular ended up pregnant. She knew I didn’t want kids, and she tried to trap me into a relationship I didn’t want. I got the snip after that.”

  “I remember you telling me about that. Do women really think that they’ll be able to force you to stay with them if they get pregnant behind your back?”

  “Apparently, yes.” I shrug.

  “So you have a kid?”

  “Sadly for her, she miscarried. It’s horrible and selfish, but I was glad. I struggle to say no to a crying woman so breaking up with her would have been hell. I couldn’t do it.”

  “So you would have been stuck with someone you didn’t love?”

  “Yeah, much like my relationship with Lindsey.”

  “I still don’t get why you didn’t end things sooner with her if you had no feelings for her?” He frowns.

  “I don’t know. Maybe I was scared of how my family would be toward me if I did. It’s been an ongoing battle for the longest time with them so I wouldn’t put it past them to plan their revenge now that I went against their plans of getting Lindsey and I married.”

  “Have they been in contact since?” Matt asks just as they bring us our drinks and food.

  “So far, no, I thought my father would start threatening me straightaway. They’ve left me alone ever since that day. I haven’t even heard from Lindsey.”

  “That’s a shocker. I mean she appeared to be a clingy one.”

  “She was. She was needy and clingy, and when she wasn’t getting the attention she wanted, she would throw tantrums like a five-year-old.”

  “That’s quite sad actually. Was she spoiled growing up?”

  “Yeah, whatever she wanted, her parents would do anything for her to get it. I don’t think she’s ever been told no.”

  “Until you.” He chuckles.

  “Yeah, I’m still scared of what’s to come with them. I know how my family is. The wedding is in two months, and I’m dreading it more and more the closer we get to the date.” I sigh feeling like something big is going to hit us.

  “You don’t think that she’d go as far as getting you kidnapped and forced into marriage?”

  “I honestly wouldn’t put it past them to do that,” I scoff.

  “That’s fucked up. I guess I’ll have to glue myself to you so they can’t take you away on your own.” He smirks at me.

  “That’s one way to see things. The fact that they are being so quiet and leaving me alone is pretty unsettling. I don’t know what to expect anymore wi
th them.”

  “I don’t blame you. You know I’m here for you, and you can come crash at mine whenever you want to.”

  “Thanks.” I smile, feeling myself blush.

  We fall into a comfortable discussion while we eat our food. It’s delicious, and I’m learning so much about Matt. Things I didn’t suspect at all.

  After dinner, we decide to go back home and have a couple of drinks there. It’s easier as I’m not ready yet to be outed in public. I’m not ashamed, but I wouldn’t want anyone who knows my family to see it and report it back to my parents. It could potentially put Matt in danger, and that’s the last thing I want to do.

  We each drive our cars back home, and I’m glad I have some time to collect myself. I could feel the sexual tension build up between us over dinner. I want him more than I’ve ever wanted anyone, and if the way he looked at me is anything to go by, I’d say he feels the same way. I’m ready for more with Matt. I want to give us a try, I just don’t know how to tell him or initiate it. I’m so not used to any of this. It’s messing with my head and my ability to form any coherent sentence.

  I park my car in my driveway as Matt does in his. I take a deep breath and get out of my car. He walks to mine and holds the door open for me.

  “Such a gentleman.” I chuckle.

  “Always. I had a good time tonight, but you didn’t have to buy me dinner, you know.”

  “I invited you, besides I wanted to. You’ve done so much for me these past few weeks.”

  “I haven’t done much.” He looks at me confused.

  “Being there for me when I needed it the most after my family went bat shit crazy that one night? That to me is more than enough.”

  “Fair point.”

  “Do you, uh, want to come in?” I ask nervously, and I guess he can tell I’m nervous.

  “I should probably go home. I have work in the morning, and I’m leaving for Haven and Spencer’s wedding in Hawaii,” he sounds saddened that he has to say no.

  “No worries.” I smile, but I’m a bit disappointed.

  “I know if I come in that I won’t leave, and we won’t get any sleep. I don’t want to make you do something that you’re not ready for just yet.”

  “You don’t have to justify yourself.” I smile.

  “By the look of disappointment on your face, I didn’t want to make it seem that I didn’t want it or you.”

  “I didn’t realize I looked that crushed.” I chuckle.

  “I mean I get you. Spending a night with me would be magnificent, and being told no isn’t nice.”

  “It’s alright, really. I just worked myself up so much getting the balls to ask you to come in.”

  “I’m gone for eight days. When I come back, if you still want it, it’ll happen. I promise.” He steps closer to me and brushes his lips against mine, sending shivers down my spine.

  “Have fun in Hawaii,” I whisper against his lips.

  “I’ll try, but it’ll be hard without you.” He pecks my lips again, and I feel a fire burning inside of me. It’s insane, I’ve never felt this way.

  The things Matt does to me are unreal. He’s about to leave and walk back to his when I grab his left hand with my right one. He slowly turns to me, and I tug on his arm, pulling him to me.

  I don’t know what comes over me, but I have to do this while I still have the balls to. I’m not sure I can wait another eight days before this happens.

  Before I can allow my mind to backtrack, I cup his face with my left hand and pull it toward me. We both breathe each other in before our lips crash together. This kiss is unlike any other I’ve experienced before. I don’t know if it’s because it’s Matt or because it’s the first time I actually feel something more than just pure desire, but this kiss is perfect. It’s the first time something feels so right for me. I’ve never felt this level of closeness and intimacy with anybody else.

  The kiss is hard yet soft, it is passionate and filled with our hunger for each other.

  Our lips crashing against together in an attempt to get more of the other are swelling with the desire we feel for one another.

  Our teeth, nipping at each other’s lips, trying to keep the other as close as can be.

  Our mouths slowly open, letting our tongues slowly come in to play, sucking and caressing each other’s.

  I’ve never felt like this in my life. I feel happy. The entire world around me is gone, there’s only Matt and I. It feels right. It is right.

  I walk Matt backward until he’s pressed against the wall to my house. He places his hand on my chest and caresses down to the waistband of my jeans. He wraps his arm around my waist and holds me to him, deepening our kiss if it’s possible.

  Our kiss is abruptly stopped when my phone rings. That dreaded ringtone. I groan into the kiss, and Matt pulls away, looking at me confused.

  “Who’s the cock block?” He frowns.

  “My father,” I say through gritted teeth as I pick up. “What?” I say into the phone as Matt kisses my neck and sucks on it before walking away winking at me. I wave at him and walk into my house. I’m glad he left. I can’t expect this phone call to be very pleasant.

  “Don’t talk to me like that. I’ve given you long enough to make up your mind about the wedding with Lindsey,” he says coldly.

  “That wedding isn’t going to happen, at least not with me as the groom. No matter what you do or say, it’ll never happen. You should get that in your head. I’m not going to marry someone I do not love. I’ve never had any feelings for Lindsey, and I never will.”

  “Why can’t you be like Frank and Caroline. They aren’t talking shit back and are doing as they are told!” he shouts.

  “Maybe they really are happy with the person you hand-picked for them, or maybe they are just too scared of going against what you’re saying. I don’t know. All I know is that I’m not going to do what you want to happen. I don’t know what your motives are for all of us to marry a specific person, but I won’t be a part of this.”

  “Oh but you will. Whether you like it or not, it’ll happen,” he says in a chilling voice.

  “And what are you going to do?” I drop my keys on the kitchen counter and walk upstairs.

  “That’s for me to know and for you to find out very soon. I’ll be in touch.” He hangs up before I get the chance to say anything else.

  I throw my phone on my bed and get undressed. I was rock hard before the phone call, and despite my fear of what’s to come and my anger toward Robert, I’m still rock hard, and I need to do something about it.

  I walk to the bathroom and step into the shower.

  I can still feel Matt’s lips and hands all over me. I’m sure I could come on the spot by just thinking about how he makes me feel. I’m surprised it hasn’t happened yet.

  I let the warm water wash over me. It feels like the warm caress of a lover’s touch. Something soft and passionate that leaves your skin burning.

  My hands start to spread the lather from the soap I rubbed between my hands. I caress down my stomach, feeling the bumps and ridges of my muscles. My body isn’t as defined as Matt’s, but I can’t complain.

  My hands travel down my body on their own to my already hard cock. Soft strokes make me arch my back in pleasure, imagining Matt’s hand instead of mine.

  I’m so hard and so turned on that it doesn’t take me long until my hips start to match my strokes. My soft moans of pleasure fill the room around me. I feel dizzy from so much pleasure and desire for Matt.

  It doesn’t take me long to reach my orgasm. I come in a long, deep groan of pure pleasure, coating the shower wall I’m facing.

  I lean my arm against the wall, trying to catch my breath when I hear my phone go off in the other room. I wonder who it could be at this time of the night.

  I get out of the shower and quickly dry myself before wrapping a towel around my waist. I hop to my bed and sit on it. I pick up my phone and see a couple of missed messages from random guys on Hunt4Gays,
a missed phone call from Linda, one from Lindsey, and one from Madeline.

  I ignore them all besides Madeline’s call. I ring her back while lying down on my bed.

  “Hey, sis,” I greet her when she picks up on the second ring.

  “Hey, bro.” She giggles.

  “What’s up?”

  “Robert called and asked me to kick some sense into you while we’re on vacation, that I know how important it all is, and that you and Lindsey are made to be together.” She makes a gagging sound resulting me in laughing at it. I hate that Robert is trying to get her to actually get me to comply and go with his evil plan.

  “He called me too, asking if I’d had time to think and that he’ll get me to go through with his plan whether I like it or not.” I blow out a breath.

  “I wonder what he means by that.”

  “I’m not sure, but I don’t know if I want to figure it out or not. Knowing him and Linda, it can’t be any good.”

  “I’m with you on that one. Just be careful.” She sighs.

  “I will, you know me.”

  “I know. Anyway, are you ready for tomorrow?” I can feel the smile in her voice.

  “Yes, more than. I need a vacation badly.”

  “Me too, although spending a week in Hawaii with four other girls, you’re going to go insane!” She laughs evilly.

  “Didn’t think of that. Please don’t let them try their way with me.” I chuckle.

  “I’ll do my best, but they are savages,” she whispers darkly.

  “Great. Remind me again why I said yes to go on vacation with you lot?”

  “Because you love me and you needed an escape.”

  “Ah yeah. I do need it.”

  “How are things with Matt?”

  “We kissed.” I smile to myself.

  “You finally did?” she asks, close to bursting with excitement.

  “Yeah, tonight.”

  “Who started it?”

  “He brushed his lips against mine and then was ready to leave when I stopped him and kissed him. He’s going on vacation too so I won’t see him for a week. I had to give it a try and know.”

  “Know what?” she presses.

  “Know if it would feel right and if what I felt for him was just curiosity or if I actually felt anything for him.”