Ice Burns

by Charity Ayres

  ***********************************************************

  Chandra saw a wall of pale blue. It shimmered and seemed to flow like old glass. Something moved on the other side. It was like looking through a wall of water with rainbows flickering across the surface and light sparkling as though alive.

  Ice. Not water but ice.

  On the other side of the ice wall, something shifted and moved, changing shape and mass at random. Chandra felt no unease as she watched it, however. She felt calm as she stared at the wall. It was as though she were simply watching a shadow play that the adults sometimes did for children at the estate.

  The shadow moved as though it were trying to reach her through the barrier. It seemed to beckon to her. Chandra reached out to run her hand along the surface, and the shadow parodied her movement. She stopped short of touching the surface; an odd feeling of uncertainty nagged at her. The shadow pressed darkness the size of her hand against the surface and began an impatient twitching movement as if angry for her to reach out to it. Chandra felt the slightest trepidation that stilled her hand from pressing against the ice. The dark form moved and placed another hand of shadow on the ice wall, and Chandra saw a glow begin around the shadow that was blue. As she stared at the glowing wall in front of her, a crack spread from the base. There was a wrenching sound that boomed and scraped at her eardrums.

  As quickly as it began, it stopped. Chandra found herself walking in a dark corridor behind a young woman. She did not recognize the woman, but she was familiar. She felt that her dream self knew the woman well. They walked together with a common purpose; they sought something.

  It was dark. Almost no light filled the cavern. Chandra looked around and let one hand trail along the nearest wall to discover it was rock. It was cold and smooth with strange angles and sharp edges. They were not in a building but a massive cave.

  The woman in front of her said something, and Chandra felt herself reply though no actual words penetrated her consciousness. It felt as though she were only partially submerged in this dream as if held there by the tiniest thread.

  They continued to move through the cave with no light but that from a small lamp the other woman carried. Chandra glanced behind her and felt blind. The weight of the cave made her feel insignificant and constricted. The air was stale and made her lungs feel insufficient. It was as if too deep a breath might cause her to run out of space.

  She said something to the woman ahead of her, lifting her hands in sharp movements and the world was suddenly too bright. When her eyes stopped watering, her skin and face felt as though they were on fire. Slowly, her sight repaired and brought a strange something came into focus. Something primal inside her recognized the shape before she could even focus on it. Her throat closed, and her heart raced like a great bird trapped in a tiny cage. Her mind fought to make sense of her sight as more and more of the thing before her sharpened to focus.

  It was not a thing, but a great, horned, reptilian face; and it smiled. How Chandra knew it was a smile, she could not say. It was such a fearsome, horrifying countenance. The great maw of the beast moved, and she realized it spoke. She stared, dumbstruck, as words slithered from that mouth and sudden pain took her.

  Chandra felt the cold floor of the cavern strike her backside. As she lay there, her body felt as though it were being rent apart, though she felt no pressure of touch from the beast. Invisible edges tore her clothing and skin and was followed by licks of flame. Chandra writhed on the floor and fought to rise or run or crawl or move in any way to save herself.

  A massive, scaled tail rose beside her. Chandra cringed and waited for it to crash down on her, likely the cause of her agony. The scales of the tail glinted in the flickering light. Chandra's mouth opened, though no screams came out. The tail shuddered in response. It swiped around, and Chandra realized it moved in time to her writhing. Another heartbeat in her cloud of pain and she became conscious of the fact that the tail was attached to her. She raised her hands for protection. Instead, she saw ebon-scaled claws with red talons. Dream and real Chandra screamed.

  Long moments of darkness passed as Chandra fought to free herself from under blankets and pillow. Cold air hit her skin like a wave, and she gasped it in. The sweat and breeze warred on her skin. Her hands ran across length and limb for telltale scrapes or blood but found none. Frostwhite fluttered down, his feathers wild. He looked easily twice as big as he normally was.

  Chandra reached over to stroke his feathers back into place, letting calm claim her and him both. The look in his wild eyes and sharp glances around the room told her that the dream had not been a solo venture.

  "It was only a dream," she whispered.

  It was only a dream, she told herself.

  **********************

  The next morning, she was immediately summoned to Master’s study. She considered not going, but she doubted that would change whatever lay in store for her.

  When Chandra entered the room, she found Master Dreys sitting at the same table he had tested her at the previous day. She fought the surprise that threatened to reveal itself on her face.

  “Sit.”

  Chandra did as she was commanded and saw papers, books, and writing quills. It was to be another test day and nothing more. She allowed her spine to relax a hair's breadth and then reminded herself what was at a stake.

  She needed to figure out a way to barely pass convincingly. She knew if the test was not complicated, failing outright would not benefit her any more than her previous pass.

  There was a knock at the door.

  “Come in,” Master Dreys called out and stood.

  Deakon stepped in, and Chandra looked at him. She sometimes thought of him as a grasshopper. His legs had always seemed too long for his body and were rail-thin. His slow movements were twitchy as though he were waiting for the right moment to hop away. She could easily imagine his legs folding up like the insects and him leaping from place to place. She wondered if such a big grasshopper would make a good meal for Frostwhite. Chandra ducked her head to hide the grin.

  Master Dreys motioned Deakon to the seat beside Chandra.

  “I have decided to challenge you both through comparison,” Master Dreys announced. Chandra saw a tiny bit of white between mustache and goatee while Master paused.

  Chandra bit down on the choice words that threatened to spill loudly from her mouth. Her jaw pulled into a clench that made the muscle jump. The tall young man stood as though waiting; his face was expressionless, and she wondered if he had known about this.

  “Apprentice, stand here,” Master motioned to a spot on the floor near the door. “Deakon, here.”

  Master stood in front of his desk. Chandra realized he had summoned them both in the same tone he called the hounds.

  Master Dreys moved once Deakon had taken his spot. Master stood in the middle of the room. He watched both students as they finished shifting and looked to him for the next command. Chandra wondered when his eyes had taken on such a glittering depth like that of the onyx base in the peristyle.

  “Your jobs today will be to move me to the opposite side of the room.”

  His face shifted, and Chandra felt a strange heat. Master's mouth drew into a tight line that almost pushed his teeth out into an animal-like snarl. She swallowed, feeling an instinctual need to step away from him as though he were rabid.

  He raised his dark eyes to meet Chandra’s. She saw them glitter dangerously at her, and she looked away. Something told her she shouldn’t meet Master's eyes for any length of time. She didn't know if it was again instinct or something more. Master had always been able to anticipate her movements as though he read her thoughts.

  Chandra slowly raised hazel green eyes to her opponent in this test. Ocean blue eyes to meet ocean blue. Deakon met her gaze steadily, and she saw no hint of emotion there. They might have been strangers, the way they looked at each other.

  Chandra mind raced as she tried to grasp what she had been taught abou
t manipulating magic to do a particular task. She remembered that to move objects she should focus her magic into something that could complete the job she needed. She envisioned magic forming into a giant hand that wrapped around Master Dreys.

  Master slowly slid on the floor toward her.

  Chandra imagined wrapping that hand in a glove that could grip and Master paused and shifted away for a moment before continuing to come closer. She felt the hand being pried at if that was even what was happening, but she kept the fingers closed against tendrils that seemed to try to wedge between her grasp and Master Dreys. Master was practically in front of her.

  Master's eyes found Chandra. Pain drove through her as his hand slammed into her cheekbone. The stinging shock knocked her over, and she lay on the rug, her eyes green dots in a white abyss as she looked up and her magic loosened.

  “Get up!” he yelled. His eyes glittered black; his face flushed an ugly red as he began to slide slowly away.

  13

  Chandra hastened to her feet, the side of her face burning and stinging from where he had hit her.

  Unfortunately, she was still within arm's reach of Master, and he used it to his advantage. He grabbed her chin and jerked her head to meet his gaze. Chandra gasped at the pain of his grip and the heat in his eyes.

  “This time, you will do it right,” Master Dreys hissed in her face. His breath was reminiscent of tea and the sweet rolls that were his regular morning meal and her stomach twisted with memories that had been fond.

  Chandra fought the urge to recoil because she realized it would only make him angrier. She tried to nod in his grip since her ability to speak had fled like she wished to. Master must have felt her tiny movement of acquiescence because he released her chin. He waved his arms and the magic she and Deakon had wrought around him.

  “Again!” he shouted once he had moved back center of them.

  Chandra shivered and watched him immediately slide across the floor toward her. She could not think of what to do to push him away. With each inch he moved closer, her fear increased and her uncertainty made the task of thinking almost impossible. When Master was again a foot away from her, she raised one hand to ward off the blow. She watched in shock as Master quickly slid almost all the way across the room. Deakon looked horrified, and the anger dropped from Master Dreys’ face.

  “Good,” he said as he tugged at his jacket to smooth it out. “One more time, I think.” Both combatants dropped their arms and released whatever magic they had manipulated, purposely or, in Chandra's case, through fear. Master Dreys moved again to the middle of the floor, and both students froze.

  “Again,” his tone was impatient.

  Chandra watched Master slide toward her again and didn’t know what to do. How had she pushed him last time? She had raised her hand at the last minute to fend off the strike he was about to deal her, but she couldn’t remember anything but terror. It had been instinctual to raise her hand to block being slapped by Master Dreys, but that was all she had done.

  It wasn’t long, and Master Dreys was standing in front of her again, frowning. Chandra had been so lost in thought as she tried to puzzle out what had saved her, that she hadn't watched the progression across the room. Chandra cringed and waited for him to strike her.

  “I’m disappointed, Apprentice,” he said. Master wasn't going to hit her, and Chandra thought about how she once felt struck when he used to tell her he was disappointed. Now, she just felt relief.

  “You are both dismissed.”

  Chandra didn’t hesitate and hurried out the door as rapidly as she could without running. She heard Deakon’s footsteps behind her. His grasshopper legs caught her long before she made it to the end of the hall. His hand jerked her to a halt.

  Chandra narrowed her eyes. The fear in her changed to anger with a ready outlet. Her eyes were sparkling green slits as she looked up at the young man who gripped her arm. His face was too close to hers. It made her want to shove Deakon.

  “Not so high on power now, are you?” he hissed at her. “You’re the same, stupid girl you’ve always been.”

  Chandra attempted to jerk her arm away from him but he held on.

  "You know that you don't have the power to be his apprentice, so why don't you give up?

  Chandra bit down on various responses, none of which would make things any better for either of them. She wondered if he thought Master Dreys would let her walk away because she was certain that would never be the case.

  His whole body shook with rage and frustration. If the hall hadn't been deserted, they would have gathered an audience by now. She doubted anyone would do more than cheer on Deakon and make no attempt to stop them.

  She tugged again, but he didn't let go. Inside her, emotions welled up from fear, the change in Master Dreys, and the spot where her cheek continued to sting. Chandra knew she had to find a way to go, but also know that Master seemed to have no bounds on what he did to get what he wanted. Her thoughts tore through her, and she swung at Deakon, who ducked.

  “Don’t you think if I could I would?” The dam inside her burst out the thought before she could control it. The words hung in the air and cooled tempers. Chandra's face fell, and her shoulders slumped. She knew she was in an impossible situation and couldn't deal with his hate right then. She felt hopeless and trapped.

  Deakon didn’t respond. He stared at her for a long moment while she looked at the floor and wondered if the soil beneath would be willing to come through and pull her under.

  Deakon released her and stalked off. Chandra stood for a moment and watched him go. She wished she hadn't spoken because she now felt exposed.

  Idiot. What did you think would happen? Did you think he would just say, 'Okay, great. Let's be friends now and get you away from the estate so I can take your place'?

  She returned to her room and went the water basin to splash water on her face. She lifted the rough, tiny towel down and dried her face. Chandra looked in the mirror.

  Bloodshot eyes with wet, dark lashes and pale skin reflected back at her. Her eyebrows were dark relief on the lack of color in her skin other than the slight flush around her mouth and the dark red growing on her cheek. Her dark hair cloaked her oval face, and her lips drew a severe line that hid the bow shape. She didn’t recognize the frightened face.

  She looked at herself and tried to force the false Chandra back into place. The effort of trying to lock away all the feelings caused her head to hurt. Chandra lifted her brush and flung it across the room.

  “Now, now, none of that, Apprentice,” the familiar voice caused chills to run up and down her spine and fear to stop her heart for a moment. “I had come to see if we could work on you having better control of your magic and find you acting like the spoiled child you are instead.”

  Chandra wondered if Master Dreys could smell her fear or hear it in her thoughts. She felt a feather-soft touch in her mind and knew Frostwhite was with her even though she knew he wasn't in the rafters above. Warmth wrapped around her as though Frostwhite shared his wings as an embrace to comfort and shield her. She let her anger cool and her fear, though not gone, was but a feather's weight compared to the mass that had threatened to crush her. She sent her friend a silent thank you.

  Chandra realized Master Dreys had been speaking to her for a while.

  “...have skill but no control. That must change, Apprentice.”

  Chandra nodded at Master Dreys though she did lift her eyes. She knew a reminder of her fear waited in glittering black contempt.

  “To do so, I’ve brought you something new that you need to get familiar with by tomorrow,” Master set something on the table before turning to walk out of her room.

  Chandra didn't move from the spot she stood. She lifted her eyes.

  On the table was a polished honey-colored wood box with a black latch that set across the ring without a lock to hold it closed. It looked as though it was a recently crafted item and the smell that came from it when she stepped closer co
nfirmed that. Cedar and varnish tickled her nose in a way that wasn't unpleasant so much as it reeked of newness.

  Innocuous as it was, Chandra did not want to touch it. Her mind created multiple scenarios of dark intent spewing forth from the box of pale wood and precise lines. Her stomach heaved, and she shook as she lifted her hand from her side to raise the latch and open the box. She didn’t know what she had expected to find in the small rectangular chest, but the truth was a surprise.

  Inside the pale, rough-edged box was a knife. Or at least, that's what it appeared to be at first glance. Chandra's hand moved from the lid to the finely carved steel inside. It had twisted wire decoration and gemstones scattered like stars. Her hand froze above the magnificently crafted blade as she realized there was no handle. It was curved and looked like a well-made knife to about half-way along metalwork. Where the handle should be was instead a wickedly curved edge of worked steel. The knife, if one could even classify it that way, was an S-shape, but the bottom curve of the S was where the curved wire and gems met rear blade. The tip of the S was at a sharp point aimed toward the center of the shape, making it impossible for a person to put their hand around it to hold the blade. At best, with precise care, one could lift it with two slender fingers, but it didn't look as though even that would be possible with all of the metalwork. It looked to be weighty.

  What do I do with this? How would a knife help me with control?

  Chandra heard a rush of wings, and Frostwhite landed on the table beside the box that held the blade. He leaned in for a moment to study the object the let out a hiss that sent a shiver up the young woman’s spine. In her mind, she saw an image of black and red smoke rising from the blade and caught a smell of damp fear. The hawk was trying to tell her the blade was something more than it appeared. It was as though he could see evil in the metal. She looked at the great bird who met her eyes with a liquid silver gaze.