by Amanda Munoz
Just as expected Javier’s brother is waiting for us when we arrive. He looks a lot like him but he’s a little older and definitely not as good looking. He’s really sweet though.
“You are beautiful!” he says as he pulls me into a huge hug. His English isn’t like Javier’s but I can still understand him just fine.
“Thank you.” I say and smile up at him. I never accepted compliments very well before. I would just look down bashfully and not respond but since I’ve met Javier I’ve learned to accept them and have some confidence in myself. He’s constantly telling me how beautiful I am and it always feels so good to hear it. I can look him in the eye when he tells me things now and it’s a big step for me. I even look at myself with more confidence than I ever did in the past.
“Hermano, I’ve missed you.” Javier greets his brother and together they carry our luggage out of the airport.
Apparently the airport is one of the busiest in South America and there are a ton of shuttles and taxis and traffic outside when we arrive. Luckily Javier’s brother did a very good job navigating and it wasn’t stressful in the slightest. I wasn’t sure what to expect as far as the weather here but I was pleasantly surprised when we walked outside. Its 68* partly cloudy, zero humidity and its perfect. Javier said the airport is closer to his home town than Quito which is confusing because I thought the airport was in Quito. Anyway, it’s a pleasant drive but not too much to see and I’m so anxious to get out and explore. I know that I need to be patient since we are going to meet his family first. This is important to Javier and I want this for him but I wish I could ignore this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that this will be the last time get gets to see them.
We arrive at the B&B and it is so charming. It’s painted just like a picturesque Spanish style home in terracotta and mustard yellow with pops of turquoise here and there. It’s surrounded by beautiful landscaping with bright, colorful flowers and stunning plants and trees. It’s an oasis and I love it. We check in and an American woman is working the front. She talks animatedly about all the amenities offered and hands us brochures of all the tourist destinations located nearby. Javier starts talking to her in Spanish and I get the idea he’s telling her that this his country and we don’t need brochures. She goes to take them back but I grab them from her hands.
“I just want to see.” I tell Javier. He doesn’t say anything but he gives me a look like it’s a waste of time. We are escorted to our room and he throws the luggage on the floor and jumps on the bed. The room is small and quaint but I like it. It has a small dresser and closet and a queen sized bed underneath a large window. You can see the pool from the window and people are out there so swimming so I close the curtains for a little privacy. I lay down on the bed next to Javier but only for a moment since his brother is outside waiting for us.
“I’m your tour guide. Those guides are so cliché. I’m going to show you the real stuff” he says as he starts changing his clothes. He tells me about a few places near the capital that he wants to take me to and I smirk when his back is away from me because they are exactly the same places as in the brochures. I won’t say anything though. I will let him guide me and I know it’s going to be a fabulous time. We both change our clothes since we’ve been in them for hours and then head outside where his brother’s still waiting with the car idling.
There is such a wide range of homes and neighborhoods here that it blows me away. There are huge, beautiful, architectural homes on the hillsides and then small apartments stacked on top of one another closer to the city streets. Javier’s mom lives in one of these apartments. They look more modern and in a nice clean area. I briefly wonder what the real estate is like here. His mom doesn’t work but they have kept the store in the family and with all of the siblings Javier has I’m sure she gets along just fine. I know Javier sends her money monthly. He says it’s the least he can do for raising all of them on her own after his father died. As soon as we pull up I’m so overtaken by nerves that my palms are sweaty and I’m taking rapid, shallow breaths. I keep telling myself to calm down, take a few deep breaths, it will be fine but I’m so afraid she won’t like me. Javier loves his mom so much and I know it’s important to him that she like me and I can’t help but wonder what Javier will feel if his mom doesn’t. Javier opens the door eager to get out and I grab his hand stopping him. I think I’m going to hyperventilate.
“Muñeca, calm down. She will love you.” He tells me tenderly caressing my cheek as he rests his forehead against mine.
“How do you know that?” I ask him.
“Because, I love you.” He says and then kisses me so slowly and so tenderly that as soon as he pulls away I feel empty without him.
I expect to meet his mom and maybe a brother or sister or two, but I’m so wrong. As soon as we walk in we are bombarded by a house full of Javier’s family. He has all his siblings here, their significant others and their kids, and even a couple aunts and uncles and cousins. The house is full of people and food. Its smells amazing. Javier is just as shocked as I am by the turnout of relatives at his moms.
“They all came to meet you babe” he whispers in my ear. That does nothing to calm my nerves. I’m overwhelmed and Javier squeezes my hand gently. It’s his way of assuring me that he is here, that I’m not alone and that as long as we are together everything will be fine. Everyone is hugging me and kissing my cheek and telling Javier how “muy guapa” I am. There is no way I’m going to remember everyone’s name, I hope I don’t make a fool out of myself. Javier’s mom was apparently in the kitchen but as she enters the living room the crowd parts like the red sea. She is lovely, and I instantly see the resemblance between her and Javier. He has her eyes, the same caramel skin, and beautiful smile. I’m nervous as she walks towards me and I know it’s written all over my face.
She walks up to me and she is just a little shorter than I am. Her hair was once black but now mostly silver. Its pulled up half way and fastened in the back. She is wearing a soft blue sweater and has a beautiful, brightly colored apron on. She doesn’t say a word but grabs both of my hands in hers and looks at me for a bit. Studying my eyes. I don’t know if I should say something. I feel anxious standing there with her staring at me like that and then suddenly she pulls me into her arms. This is most definitely Javier's mom because instantly I feel at ease, accepted and comfortable. I hug her back and can’t help notice Javier’s smile as he watches us. When she pulls away she wipes her eyes. Her pretty brown eyes are red and glossy
“Come, come. Let’s eat.” She says to me and grabs my hand pulling me towards Javier. She lets go and pulls Javier into a hug and I swear it lasts forever. She doesn’t want to let him go. I know how she feels. Finally they move a part and she takes my hand again but this time puts it in his.
“Hold each other, and love each other. Every moment is a gift.” She says to me and my eyes instantly water. I don’t let the tears fall though. I won’t do that to Javier, not now.
The meal she prepares is familiar because it’s exactly the same one Javier made for me. It’s delicious and comforting and I enjoy every bite. I can only assume she asked Javier what to make and this is what he suggested. It's so sweet of him to do that for me. Dinner is a great time. Everyone is talking and laughing and I feel part of the family already. Everybody seems genuinely interested in me. They ask where I’m from, what I do, how Javier and I met. I feel comfortable talking to them and realize in just a few short hours they know more about me then some people I’ve known for years. I've been alone so long that I didn’t realize how much I missed having company, missed the feel of being surrounded by people who love and care for you. It’s a great feeling and I want to hold on to it for as long as I can.
The night finally winds down and we say our goodbyes. It's really late or really early depending on how you look at it. Javier is borrowing his mom’s car, he said she doesn’t drive much these days so we will use it while we are here. I know the plan is to stay in and around town for
a week but he hasn't told me where we are going afterwards. He, of course wants to surprise me. We arrive back at the B&B and I'm exhausted, we have been awake nearly 24 hours and that’s just too much for me. We are both drained and we change out of our clothes and crawl into bed together. As soon as my head hits the pillow I’m out and I sleep peacefully having had a wonderful day.
JAVIER
WORTH IT
22.
I’ve been so damn tired lately. The two weeks between the time I booked the tickets and the actual flight have made a huge difference. My head pounds literally all day long and I just want to sleep. I could sleep for days. I’m determined to try and have a good time, try to make this trip worth it. For her and for us. I’m glad I decided to come though, it’s so good to see my family. Especially my mom. But she is such a cry baby, much like Aby I guess. I get it, I do, but I don’t want the constant reminder. We are going to have fun, I’m going to visit with my family and have a great time. I just hope I’ll be okay for the next few weeks. I’m crossing my fingers.
Stunning
23.
I wake after just a few hours of sleep excited to hit the capital. Javier has been sleeping a lot lately and he is still knocked out beside me. I let him sleep and decide to get ready since I take much longer than him anyway. I take my time in the shower and continue to get ready leisurely but Javier is still asleep. I finally decide to go downstairs and get some breakfast and am surprised that he still hasn’t woken up by the time I return. Its nearly noon by the time Javier wakes up and I’ve already eaten breakfast and went for a swim without him. I’m anxious and ready to get out of here so I’m glad when he finally opens his eyes.
“What time is it?” he asks groggily as he reaches his arms above his head stretching.
“11:54” I tell him. He sits up in bed with his hair a mess looking tired but sexy. I smile at him and figure he must have just really needed the rest. We have been busy the last few days and it’s got to catch up with you eventually.
“Shit. Really?” He gets out of bed and heads over to his suitcase to grab some clothes.
“Well, we were out pretty late. Your body needed it.” Javier walks up to me clothes in hand and leans down to kiss my forehead. He walks towards the bathroom and leaves the door open while he turns on the water and strips out of his shorts and tee-shirt.
“Sorry muñeca, I’ll be quick so we can get going. I want to take you into Quito.” He pushes the door mostly closed and hops in the shower but it isn’t quick. He’s in there a long time. A really long time.
I’m beginning to grow restless and decide to go in there and make sure he is okay. I slowly open the bathroom door and can see Javier sitting down through the glass shower door. His back is up against the tiled wall and the water is cascading over him. He isn’t moving and my first thought is that he fell asleep in there. I open the shower door startling him. “Sorry. I’ll get out right now.” I’m about to ask him if he is ok but he cuts me off. “Can you shut the door please? It’s cold.”
"Are you-" I begin.
"I said its cold." he cuts me off again. This time I do as he asks and shut the shower door and then bathroom door as I walk back towards the bed. I’m worried about him. I’ve learned that when he gets snappy like that it’s because he doesn’t feel well, he just never admits it.
A few minutes later Javier comes out of the bathroom fully dressed and ready to start the day.
He claps his hands together enthusiastically. “Let’s do this!” he says animatedly.
He’s like a totally different person right now. He seems so rejuvenated and energized. He seems like himself again. I decide to just let the earlier incident go and I never try to ask him if he is ok again.
We dress in layers because he says the weather can be unpredictable and the elevation has a lot to do with it. It’s kind of hard to breath up here but I’m still so anxious I that I don’t give it a second thought as we head out.
Quito is incredible. We spend hours walking around and seeing the most beautiful historic cathedrals in the world. A few of them charge a small entrance fee which is well worth it. I’m in awe at the sheer amount of detail and ornate design in the churches. Gilded walls and incredible paintings. Intricate carvings and wonderful craftsmanship. I can’t even put into words the amount of detail some of these cathedrals have. It’s one of those things you have to see to believe. It’s absolutely stunning.
We continue to walk and visit a local market with handmade crafts and foods. We have such a good time; laughing and talking and trying new things. We find a local spot which Javier said hasn’t been destroyed by tourists yet and have a late lunch together.
“So now we head to the cable car.” He says to me as he gulps down half of his glass of water.
I noticed the cable cars earlier today. I thought it must be an incredible view but it’s seriously high and kind of freaks me out.
“Cable car?” I ask him as I finish my last bite. I look down at Javier’s plate and as usual it’s mostly untouched. I can’t remember the last time he has finished an entire meal.
“Can you take a few more bites please?” I ask him concerned.
“It’s an amazing view of the city from up high. You’re not scared are you?” he baits me and completely ignores my request for him to eat some more.
“Of course I am.” I state simply. “But I’ll do it if you eat.” I grin and he looks down at his plate and then at mine.
Thankfully, he grabs his fork and eats about five more bites before throwing his napkin down on his plate as his indication that he’s held his end of the bargain and I have to hold mine. He didn’t eat much but it’s more than he had so I pick and choose my battles and don’t say anything more.
I knew that being that high would be frightening but not until I was actually up there did I realize the magnitude of my fear. All of the massive buildings we’d seen all day looked minuscule up here in comparison and that really put into perspective how high we were. The cable cars were running all day with people getting on and off like it was nothing. But now that I was about to board, the fear was overwhelming and I didn’t think I would be able to do it.
“I can’t do this.” I tell him at the last minute backing up.
“You can do anything.” He says to me and gets on first. Is he really going to go even if I stay behind?
“Are you going to leave me here?” I ask him shocked that he went in and looked settled and ready to go.
“No, you are coming with me. Let’s go.” I look back at the attendant who looks seriously annoyed that I’m holding him up. “Once in a life time muñeca. Don’t live with regrets beautiful. You only live once. Next thing you know, you will be base jumping” he says.
“Javier, this is scary. We are really high.” I want to do it but my nerves are getting the best of me and he has lost his mind if he thinks I’d ever base jump. The attendant behind me is starting to sigh and make annoyed noises that I’m trying my best to ignore.
“I told you muñeca, I’ll never let you fall.” He reaches his hand out for me.
“Right superman. You can just keep this thing floating in air if the cables go out.” I jumped off a cliff I can do this... I take a tentative step towards him then rush into the car. He’s right you only live once.
I’m so glad that I got on. We have a blast. I curl up close to him and enjoy the ride. It’s an incredible view and once we start moving it’s really not the scary. I feel pretty secure; after all, superman won’t let me fall.
~*~*~*~*~
After a long day sightseeing we go back to Javier’s moms house for dinner. Just as before there are a lot of family there and lots to eat. We laugh and talk and have a good time. They play music and dance. Everyone is so happy and carefree it’s really a beautiful thing to see.
“Dance with me?” one of Javier’s cousins asks. I smile and decline his offer. I don’t dance and most definitely can’t dance to this music. He doesn’t take no for an answer
and instead grabs my hand. I look to Javier for help but he doesn’t save me, he encourages me to go. After a moment everyone notices and they are all trying to get me to go dance. I give in and decide to try it but I warn him that I have no rhythm.
“Yeah, I hear that about you American women.” He says jokingly.
“It’s not American women, it’s just me!” I tell him and laugh as he rolls his eyes. I’m awful and step on his feet a few times but I feel free and light. The music moves through me and I move to it without thought. No one is judging me and no one is really even watching me. All my insecurities dissipate and my body just naturally reacts and I find myself having a really great time. Song after song plays and I’m hot and tired but don’t want to stop. I’ve danced with just about every one of Javier’s cousins and now have made myself in with a group of the girls. The beat of the drums and the sound of the guitar strings pull me into a peace I have never felt before. I move and sway and feel the music down to my core. I close my eyes and lose myself.
Warm, strong arms encircle my waste and I turn my head to see Javier is behind me, we have never danced together before and he leads and I follow. I love the feel of his body against mine as we move to the beat. Not surprisingly he can dance really well. We glide along the floor and he spins me around and pulls me back in rocking his hips against mine. He leans down and sings along to the song softly against my ear as we move together to the music. The beat vibrates through my body and engulfs us both in a trance. Everyone and everything else fades away, in this moment it is only him and I; we are alone in our own little world. And it’s a beautiful world.