Hold on to Love

by Roberta Capizzi

He rubbed a hand across his face, and unbuttoned the first button on his white shirt, the one she’d bought for him when they were in New York. She’d almost forgotten how gorgeous he looked in it.

  “You’re a tease, City Girl. I kinda hate you right now.” Alyssa quirked an eyebrow and he smiled. “It’s gonna be so hard for me to keep my hands to myself, now. You’re . . . you’re . . . unbelievably gorgeous. I’ll definitely have to keep an eye on Joe today.”

  “Who’s Joe?”

  He stepped inside the room and pulled her into a hug, taking a long whiff of her perfume.

  “Just my cousin. He’s quite a heartthrob, and used to steal all the girls’ hearts when we were in college.”

  Alyssa smiled and brushed his cheek. “Don’t worry; he won’t be able to steal mine, since it already belongs to someone else.”

  His face cracked into a big grin and she couldn’t help kissing him, even though she knew she’d smear her lipstick. He responded eagerly to the kiss, not seeming to care about her lipstick either.

  When he pulled back, she laughed at the way the color of his lips mirrored hers only a minute before.

  “Christmas Cherry’s just your color, you know,” she said, brushing her thumb across his lips to remove any trace of lipstick there. “Must buy you one the next time I’m in town.”

  He bit her thumb the moment it brushed his bottom lip and she let out a squeal. When she was sure she’d removed every bit of color from his lips, she turned back toward the mirror and applied more lipstick to her swollen lips.

  “Gorgeous,” he said with a nod of appreciation. “But now we really have to get out of this room; I’m not sure how long I can be alone with you in here. Temptation tempts the temptee, ya know?”

  With a playful slap on her behind, which was something she was starting to love about him, he spun back and walked out of the room with Alyssa following in tow.

  ***

  “Hey there, stranger. I thought you’d never show up.” Melanie flung her arms around Sean’s neck as soon as he walked into the living room. “Merry Christmas, Cuz.”

  She planted a loud kiss on his cheek, and for the first time in his life, her display of affection made him feel uneasy. They’d always been close—Sean, Melanie, Joe and Andy—when they were kids. When Sean and Joe were just about to start their junior year in high school, Sean’s uncle got a job offer in Cheyenne and they all moved there, so they didn’t see much of one another until Sean went to college. His aunt insisted on having him stay at their house and they became one big happy family again.

  Sean had never minded Melanie’s hugs and kisses before, but now that Alyssa was standing only a few feet away, he wondered if she would find it strange or if it would annoy her.

  “Merry Christmas, Mellie,” he said, knowing just how much she hated that nickname he and Joe had created when they were in high school and wanted to tease her. She was only three years younger than them, but they’d always treated her as if she were a baby.

  Melanie scrunched up her nose and punched him in the shoulder.

  “Jerk.”

  “He sure is.” Joe stepped forward, looking like a model, his golden curls styled to perfection and his face cleanly shaven, unlike Sean’s, who didn’t want to get rid of his five o’clock shadow, especially since Alyssa had told him he looked very manly and sexy.

  Even though he trusted Alyssa’s judgment and feelings, he couldn’t help feeling underdressed and plain ugly compared to his cousin. Even with a simple dark sweater and a pair of dress pants Joe looked a million dollars. Damn him.

  “Watch your mouth, Joey boy, if you don’t want me to start telling stories about your high school mischief while we’re all having lunch. I’m sure your parents would love to hear some of that.”

  Joe let out a loud laugh, and finally settled his eyes on Alyssa, who’d been standing in the doorway watching the banter between the three of them.

  “And who’s this gorgeous lady?” Joe stepped around Sean and went straight for Alyssa’s hand, kissing it in the old-fashioned way he always used to charm all women. Sean bowed his head; Joe hadn’t changed a bit.

  Sean saw Alyssa’s cheeks flush and he felt the urge to protect her from his cousin’s claws, although he knew Joe would never do such a slimy thing as to steal Sean’s girl.

  “That’s my girlfriend, buddy, so retract your claws and leave her alone if you care for your life.”

  Joe laughed and winked at Alyssa. “I’m Joe, Sean’s dearest cousin. I’m extremely pleased to meet you.”

  “And I’m Melanie, his sister.” Melanie bumped him away with her hip and he staggered, letting out another laugh. “Don’t mind him; he thinks he’s so cool, but he’s harmless, really. Tammy said you’ve just moved from New York? It must be quite different for you here.”

  Alyssa nodded and told her a little about her decision to move to Wind Creek. When she reached the point where she said she’d be attending college in Cheyenne and had been looking at apartments before coming here, Melanie exploded like fireworks.

  “Move in with me!” she said, jumping up and down like a little girl. “Move in with me; I’ve just rented an apartment in town, close to college. Our parents’ house is on the outskirts of Cheyenne and I couldn’t be bothered travelling all the way to work every morning. Besides,” she said, lowering her voice conspiratorially, “I really wanted to move out, get some privacy, you know? I’ve been dating this amazing guy for almost a year now, and we do need a little space.”

  Alyssa smiled and Sean saw her shoulders relax; his friendly cousin had already bonded with her after five minutes of knowing her. That was just how Melanie was; she could tell within a minute from being introduced to somebody whether she liked them or not and if she did, she’d be their best friend before long.

  He’d hoped once Alyssa moved to Cheyenne, Mel would help her settle in and spend some time with her so she wouldn’t be totally alone; moving in with her would be a fantastic solution. He was sure they’d be great friends—in a way, they were pretty alike, even though they came from totally different backgrounds.

  “I promise even if my boyfriend stays the night, you won’t even know he’s there. We’re reeeaaally quiet,” Melanie said with a cheeky smirk, then she turned to look at Sean. “And obviously Sean can come and stay anytime. It’d be fun to hang out together. I know it’s not like New York, but there are lots of nice shops in Cheyenne. I’d show you around, introduce you to all my friends, and—”

  “Mel, there’s plenty of time to talk about that,” Sean cut in when he felt Melanie’s enthusiasm starting to become overwhelming. “Alyssa’s not going anywhere right now; after the holidays I can drive her down to Cheyenne and she can take a look at your place and decide, okay?”

  Alyssa smiled. “That sounds like a plan.”

  “Sorry, I tend to get carried away at times.” Melanie looked apologetically at Alyssa.

  “Yeah, just a little bit, Sis; just a little bit,” Joe said wrapping an arm around his sister’s shoulder. “Now, anyone else starving here? ‘Cause I think I could eat a whole turkey right now. Shall we?”

  Joe nodded back toward the dining room and everyone followed his lead to where the big family party was going on.

  Sean walked with his hand on the small of Alyssa’s back and felt the heat radiating through the warm fabric of her dress. He’d gone back to his room last night without complaining because he was totally knackered, but there was no way he wouldn’t spend some time with her tonight. A smile curled the corners of his lips, and when Alyssa turned to look at him over her shoulder and gave him a puzzled frown, he simply shrugged and kissed the tip of her nose. If only she knew the thoughts that had been racing through his mind only seconds before . . .

  Chapter Fifty-one

  It had been ages since Alyssa had spent Christmas day surrounded by so many people. She could barely recall the year when her grandmother’s sister had come to Alyssa’s parents’ house for Christmas lunch with her whole
family. Her mother had hired a catering company and it had been one of the usual very formal lunches her mother was so fond of, but even so, Alyssa had had fun playing cards and singing Christmas songs while her grandmother’s sister played the piano. But nothing could have prepared her for the feeling of companionship she experienced while everyone was seated around the big rectangular table in the guests’ dining room. It was loud and cheerful, and she couldn’t recall laughing so much in years, especially among strangers.

  At some point during the day, Sean had convinced her to call her family to wish them a merry Christmas. She didn’t want another argument with her parents to spoil the beautiful day she was having, but Sean had been extremely persuasive, especially when he told her he’d spend the whole night cuddling her if she picked up the phone and spoke to her parents. That was the moment she’d caved.

  She hadn’t spoken to her family in almost a week; she’d received a phone call from her mother the second day she’d been in Cheyenne, and after the ultimate fight about her being an irresponsible and ungrateful daughter, they’d hung up on each other and not spoken since. She hadn’t expected her father to call to fix things; he was always too busy with all the problems related to his job to find the time to make a phone call.

  “Hello?”

  “Um . . . Derek?” Great. It had to be her annoying, insensitive brother who picked up the phone, of course. Just her typical luck.

  “Lissy? Hey, you’re alive! I thought some grizzly had feasted with your body as the main course.”

  Alyssa rolled her eyes but couldn’t help a smile from curling her lips. He was just trying to keep the mood light.

  “Ha ha. You home for winter break?” she asked, changing the subject and wanting to delay the inevitable conversation with her mother as long as possible.

  “Yep; brought Emily home with me to meet the parents. Thought it was high time.”

  “Emily?”

  Derek had never been serious enough with any girls to introduce them to the family. Alyssa had never met any of his girlfriends, apart from the times she’d seen him walk around the university campus with some girl hanging off his arm. The one time her brother had a serious relationship and she’d missed her chance to know her; perfect timing.

  Derek let out a chuckle. “My girlfriend of almost a year. Unbelievable, right? I think I’ve met my match. She’s pretty cool, funny and smart, not to mention rather gorgeous.”

  Alyssa felt her heart warm. She’d never heard her brother talk like that about a girl he was dating; “gorgeous” had always been the first adjective he’d used to describe his new date, because that was what he ever looked for in a girl. She had to look good by his side—the rest didn’t really matter.

  “She must be pretty cool indeed if she’s managed to be around for a year. I would’ve loved to meet her, damn.”

  “Well . . .” He cleared his throat nervously. “We won’t have to go back to Yale until after the holidays so, if you’re not coming home . . .”

  “No, I’m not coming home, Derek,” she snapped, wishing she’d just skipped the conversation with him and had asked him to put her through to her mother. It would’ve been easier to just get it over with and go back to the Maclaines’ celebrations. She didn’t want to listen to her brother’s judgmental talk again.

  “Lissy, please, just let me finish,” he said, letting out a sigh of exasperation. “I’m sorry about what happened at Thanksgiving. You caught me by surprise; you’ve always been the obedient, perfect daughter and I always looked up to you whenever I doubted Mom’s decisions for us. Then you came out with this nonsense about leaving your life to go after a guy who, for all I knew, could be a crazy cowboy who’d take advantage of you and your money, and I just lost it.”

  Alyssa rolled her eyes again and inhaled deeply, counting very slowly to twenty. She wasn’t going to have another fight with her brother on a festive day.

  “Even though I may not have been Brother of the Year, I do care about you. You’re my sister, and I’ll always worry about what you do and who you hang out with.”

  “Well, you never seemed to worry too much about whom I hung out with in the past,” she said, unable to contain her annoyance any longer.

  “That’s because I knew the people you hung out with were harmless. I mean, they were all people from our social circle, so Mom and Dad knew them or their families. None of them would ever do anything stupid, knowing you were the daughter of the Chief of Police. But that guy . . .”

  “Sean,” she said, irritation growing inside her with every word he said.

  “Yes, Sean,” he conceded, “I knew nothing about him and I was pretty sure neither did you. Guys can be great actors when they’re after something. I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

  “So it was better for me to hang out with Julian, right? A man ten years my senior and a stalker, just because Mom knew who he was?” There was an awkward silence and Alyssa hoped the words had sunk in at last. “You didn’t know that, did you? I don’t suppose Dad told you about our conversation on Thanksgiving? Mom had her mind set on him, no matter what I thought. He forced his tongue into my mouth and his hand into my blouse after I’d made it clear I didn’t like him. I had to slap him to break free from his vicious grip. But of course that’s okay, because he’s a famous attorney, and Mom adores him.”

  “Lissy I . . . I didn’t know that, I’m sorry.”

  “I took that holiday because of him, Derek, because he was stalking me. I couldn’t stand the sight of him; hell, I couldn’t stand the sight of myself knowing I’d let him believe I wanted to go out with him, just to please Mom.”

  She let out a long breath, feeling the anger slowly dissipate. Of course he couldn’t know; she hadn’t told anyone but Sean, not until Thanksgiving.

  “Sean is different, Derek. He’s a loving man, he’d give his life for the people he loves, and I’ve never been happier in my life than I am now, here, with him. Please, try to understand how I feel, even though it doesn’t make sense to you.”

  “I feel like an idiot, now. I feel so bad for saying those things to you, Lissy.”

  She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. It was Christmas day, after all, and it was supposed to be a day of forgiveness, peace and joy. She was the older sibling, and she should take the first step.

  “It’s okay. Let’s just forget Thanksgiving and start over, okay?” she said eventually, and heard him let out a sigh of approval.

  “Sounds great to me. So, like I was saying before you snapped at me,” Derek said with a hint of playfulness in his voice, “since we’re off until January, maybe Emily and I could come over and visit you for a couple of days, so you could meet her and I could meet this amazing cowboy who’s stolen my sister’s heart. What do you think?”

  Alyssa let out a gasp. “Are you serious?”

  “Is it so unbelievable that I want to spend some time with my sister, get to know her better and maybe go back to how things were when we were kids? We had fun together back then, didn’t we?”

  Alyssa’s eyes filled with tears and her vision blurred; was this really happening? Was she finally going to patch up her relationship with her brother, now that she lived two thousand miles away?

  “There are no five-star hotels here in Wind Creek, Derek. You’d probably have to stay in Cheyenne for that, and it’s three-hundred miles from here.”

  “I thought you said your in-laws owned a guesthouse?”

  Alyssa laughed hearing him call Sean’s family “her in-laws.” “It’s a dude ranch and it’s not actually the best time of the year to be here, what with all the snow and the cold… But maybe if you’re so set on spending a few days living like a cowboy, I could get them to give you a room.”

  “I’m sure Emily will find me rather attractive with a cowboy hat, so yes, please, see if you can book us in for say, the beginning of January? Now, I’ll put you through to Mom and Dad; I guess that’s why you called, isn’t it? Merry Christmas, Alyssa
.”

  A tear slid down her cheek and with a trembling voice she said goodbye to her brother and braced herself for the slaughter.

  When her mother came on the line, Alyssa took a long, steadying breath and held it in until she heard her mother wishing her merry Christmas, and then she let it all out in a whoosh. Her mother’s tone was firm and professional, just like it had been all of her life, but Alyssa could swear it sounded a little softer, if that were possible.

  Her mother asked her how she’d been and if she’d had a good lunch, and Alyssa found herself relaxing little by little, almost enjoying a conversation with her mother for the first time in her life. She was still wary though, and waiting for her mother to strike; when she cleared her throat and remained silent for a few seconds Alyssa braced herself, knowing this was when her mother would give the final blow. She squeezed her eyes shut and cringed, waiting for the words to hit her in the face.

  “I heard Derek saying he’ll come visit with Emily; well, I guess your father and I could go with them, meet this guy and his family, see how you’re doing . . .”

  Alyssa leaned back against the oak console table, gripping its edge and grateful for its support. If she’d been standing in the middle of the living room, she would’ve probably fallen with a thud.

  Had her mother just offered to fly all the way to Wyoming to meet the guy who’d stolen her daughter away from her world? This was starting to become a little too much to bear. She was still trying to recover from the conversation with her brother—she wasn’t ready for Judge O’Riordan to actually turn into a mother. She expected the skies would crack open any minute and the messengers from Heaven would fly down to proclaim the apocalypse had started.

  “Um . . . Mom . . . like I told Derek, there aren’t any hotels in Wind Creek. He and Emily will stay at the ranch, but . . .”

  “Well, don’t they have another room for us?”

  Alyssa swallowed. Jane O’Riordan staying anywhere without room service, a marble-tiled bathroom and mini-bar was something totally unheard of.