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A Kinky Marriage Contract

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by Neela Lotte




  A Kinky Marriage Contract

  About this Document

  Goal and Purpose

  Household Rules and Expectations

  Availability

  Social Life and Friendships

  Keeping of the Home

  Nuptial Sexuality

  Household Discipline

  Exceptions

  In Conclusion

  Appendix: Questions to Consider

  A Kinky Marriage Contract

  Copyright 2008 by Neela Lotte

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, shared, or distributed in any manner without written permission from the author.

  A Kinky Marriage Contract

  by

  Neela Lotte

  Who ever said Happily Ever After had to be boring and sexless?

  About this Document

  This “marriage contract” is, of course, not a legally binding document. It was created in hopes that it will inspire greater closeness and creativity in the marriages or future marriages of already kinky people. If you’re not into bdsm or consensual power exchange, you will probably want to put down this book and back away slowly. If you’re very humorless about relationships between the sexes, or a hard-line feminist, RUN!

  Still here? Great, that means you’re either kinky or at least curious about bdsm and power exchange relationships. This particular document is aimed at couples where the male is the Dominant or Head of Household, and the female is the submissive and/or has been willingly taken-in-hand by her Husband. In this document, I will capitalize Husband due to this dynamic, and write wife in lowercase. This does not mean the wife is the lesser party in any way. In the very best power exchange marriages, both partners give and take equally, according to their roles. If you are in a relationship, but not yet married, feel free to change the names Husband and wife to whatever better describes your current dynamic, for instance, Dom/sub, Teacher/lil girl, Master/slave, etc.

  This contract does assume that the Husband or male is the dominant partner, and the wife or female the submissive. It is also a very complex and particular combination of requirements and behaviors that will not work for everyone. For example, this document assumes that the male works, while the female stays home. If this is not the case in your home, feel free to change the requirements to reflect this. Basically, this document is presented as a sample, an example, a place to start thinking about how you want your own relationship to work. Keep what you like, change what you don’t like, add or subtract as time and circumstances dictate. As written, this contract is part true protocol, part fantasy, part porn, and part fun!

  The important thing is to celebrate your unique and harmonious relationship, not to become overly obsessed with crossing every “t” and dotting every “i.” Concentrate on the things you can do for your partner’s happiness, because that will make you happy in return. There is nothing more fulfilling than a relationship where the partners freely offer each other exactly what they need, while getting exactly what they need in return. It takes communication, courage, and generosity to find that perfect balance. The reward is Happily Ever After. I have found it with the love of my life. I wish it for you too!

  Goal and Purpose

  The goal of this document is to explicitly define the roles and responsibilities of the Dominant Husband (hereafter referred to as Husband) and submissive wife (hereafter referred to as wife) within the confines of their marriage. The purpose of this document is to create a harmonious and fulfilling household and relationship for both Husband and wife.

  General responsibilities of Husband:

  The Husband will provide a safe, comfortable, and non-abusive environment in which the wife can thrive and raise the children. The Husband will leave the home to earn a salary great enough that the wife is enabled to devote the majority of her time and efforts to pleasing her Husband and keeping his home. The Husband will provide and stringently maintain a structured and fair system of discipline (detailed in a later section) to ensure his wife is successful in meeting the household’s general goals. The Husband will nurture the wife and protect her from danger, abuse, and the untoward behavior of other males at all times and as such will maintain a healthy and vigorous physical condition to best protect her from harm. The Husband will allow his wife to follow pursuits that improve and enrich her life provided they do not interfere with the expectations detailed below.

  General responsibilities of the wife:

  The wife will keep a peaceful, organized, and loving household for her Husband’s pleasure. In gratitude for the care, respect, and protection of her Husband, the wife will adhere to a defined set of rules and habits (detailed in the body of this document) designed to please her Husband and maintain at optimum Level his physical and mental health. If necessary, she will forego her own needs and pleasures to ensure his needs are met first and foremost. The wife will submit without complaint to her Husband’s rules and requirements, to include the open and ungrudging use of her body at any time and in any manner asked. The wife will maintain an attractive and fit physique for the pleasure of her Husband. She will submit to rigorous corporal punishment when she falls short of meeting the household’s rules and goals.

  Household Rules and Expectations

  The household will be run with predictable rules and expectations so obedience and harmony can easily be achieved.

  Address and Comportment:

  Respect is the touchstone of any marriage and any strong relationship. Partners who mock, deride, and insult one another cannot experience true trust and love. Therefore, the Husband and wife shall address each other in public and in front of the children with the utmost respect, and refrain from hurtful teasing, mocking, or emotional abuse. The Husband may call the wife such terms of “endearment” as slut, whore, cum-slut, harlot, fucktoy, bitchwhore, etc, in the confines of the bedroom as part of sexual scening and play only. The wife will never at any time address her Husband with disrespect or derision, either publicly or privately. Belittling, nagging, teasing, bitching, whining, insulting, or disrespectful address on the part of the wife will be grounds for a Level 1 or 2 punishment based on the gravity of the offense (see Household Discipline.)

  In private, the Husband may request that the wife address him in a formalized way using appellations as Sir, Master, etc. These forms of address may vary and the wife will listen and obey the Husband’s instructions carefully so as to address him in the way he desires.

  Health and Physical Condition:

  A happy life begins with good health. The Husband will maintain excellent physical condition to protect his wife and family and function as breadwinner. The Husband will not drink to inebriation around the wife or children, and on the rare occasion the Husband drinks to inebriation, he will sleep on the couch and be sober by morning when the wife and children wake. The Husband will not use drugs as it may inhibit his function as leader of the household. The Husband will maintain an exceedingly fit and well-groomed physique in order to arouse and inspire obedience and submission in his wife.

  The wife will maintain the physical condition her Husband finds most womanly and appealing. Her weight will remain between ____ and ____ pounds to best preserve her feminine appearance and curves. If her weight drops below ____ lbs or rises above ____ lbs. (excepting illness or some other circumstance beyond her control) she will receive a Level 1 punishment every night until her weight returns to the appropriate boundaries. If her weight is not in compliance in a week’s time, she will receive a Level 2 punishment and be made to see a physician to search for an underlying cause. The wife will exercise at least ____ times a week to keep her body in peak physical condition, to include aerobic exercise and body sculpting exercise
as part of a well-rounded regime. Exercising less than ____ times a week will be grounds for a Level 1 punishment. Finding time to exercise will be the wife’s responsibility in time management—as she is able to stay at home and plan her day there is no excuse for non-compliance.

  Womanly Appearance:

  The wife will dress in well-fitting and tailored clothing that highlights the femininity of her body for her Husband’s pleasure. Sloppy, concealing clothing such as baggy dresses, sweaters, sweatpants, sweatshirts, flowy blouses, long, full skirts, and tunics that hide her hips and waistline, etc will not be acceptable. Purchase and use of such clothing will earn a Level 1 punishment and the clothing will be donated at once to the less fortunate.

  While feminine and well fitted, the wife’s clothing must be tasteful and not overtly sexual or immodest. The wife is permitted and encouraged to reflect her creative and quirky personality in the style of her clothes. The wife will receive an adequate allowance to clothe herself in quality garments that are flattering and bring pride to her Husband. The wife may wear pants, shorts, or jeans in her daily life as needed, but must wear skirts or dresses as often as possible in the evening at home. Under her clothing, the wife will wear provocative and alluring undergarments that signify her status as Husband’s sex toy. The use of plain cotton department store panties or modest panties is not permitted at any time and grounds for Level 1 punishment. The wife will not wear any panties under dresses and skirts, to include pantyhose or tights—if nylons must be worn, she will wear a garter belt or gartered panties. In this way the Husband can easily finger his wife as he desires and as privacy permits. No padded or lined bras may be worn, the wife may wear only sheer lace unlined bras so the wife may not hide her aroused nipples from her Husband at any time of the day, and so Husband can pinch or punish her nipples through her clothes whenever privacy permits.

  The wife will be required to wear sleepwear to bed as she is occasionally needed by the children in the wee hours of the night. If the wife sleeps in a nightgown, she will not wear panties, and she must hike the hem of the gown up to her waist under the covers so her genitals are exposed and readily available for her Husband’s use. The gown must have spaghetti straps and a low bodice to facilitate Husband groping or squeezing her breasts in sleep. Only fitted cami & pajama bottom sets are permitted, no baggy shirts or lounge pants. In sleep, under the covers, the pajama bottoms or panties must be worn pushed down to the wife’s thighs, again, to have her genitals openly exposed and ready for use.

  The wife will wear natural looking makeup, with the exception of her lips which are to be painted dark red, purple, or dark brown so as to stand out against her pale skin. The mouth and lips are to be emphasized at all times, even in sleep, as they are one of the orifices Husband most enjoys and wife’s dark lipstick serves as a constant reminder to her that her mouth is Husband’s toy.

  The wife will keep her nails trimmed and manicured modestly. The wife will wax to keep her bikini area entirely free of hair with the exception of a small “landing strip” at the front of her pubis. The wife is not permitted to completely de-nude her bikini area of hair and doing so will result in a Level 2 punishment. The wife will shave legs and underarms daily. The wife will exercise exemplary hygiene and may wear perfumes and lotions as long as their fragrance is pleasing to Husband.

  The wife will get adequate sleep and rest. The wife will be expected to manage her time so that, excepting the sexual and other needs of her Husband, she is in bed by 11 o’clock at night. This bedtime must be adhered to even when Husband is out of town unless wife receives express permission to stay up later.

  Availability

  One of the main hallmarks of the marital relationship shall be the total availability of the partners to one another, both symbolically and literally. The Husband is available at all times as the wife’s caretaker and protector. To this end, the wife is to have memorized the Husband’s work and cell phone numbers and use them as necessary when he is not at home.

  The wife is available at all times to the Husband as friend, supporter, cheerleader, helpmeet, and comfort object. While the demands of motherhood supercede the demands of Husband, the wife is to organize the home and childrearing duties so as to maximize her availability to her Husband.

  Daytime Availability:

  When children are awake, the wife’s availability is to be mainly emotional and symbolic. She is to listen to the Husband, do simple, non-sexual tasks he requests, help him in any way she can manage, and be a fun and exciting mate. She is to remember that she is Husband’s sexual toy as evidenced by her dark lipstick and undergarments, but this is to be private knowledge between her and her Husband. When the Husband is away, the wife is to be available by phone and is required to check her email hourly for directions, questions, or comments from her Husband. If the wife leaves the home she is to email Husband to let him know where she is going and when she expects to return. She is to carry a charged, operational cell phone at ALL TIMES. If at any time Husband is not able to immediately contact his wife, this is a serious, Level 3 offense.

  If Husband has need of his wife sexually while the children are still awake, he may send her with a subtle gesture or word to the master suite at such a time as it is feasible, and quickly use her mouth, pussy, or ass. At this time, she may not come unless she can do so on her own in the time Husband takes to reach climax. She may not be distracted from pleasuring Husband to find her own release. Doing so is grounds for Level 1 punishment, and will not be tolerated as time is of the essence during these daytime interludes.

  If the wife wishes to go out in the evening to run errands, or for a girls night out with her friends, permission must be asked for at least a week in advance and if granted, the outing must be noted on the family calendar. Only one such outing will be permitted a month. Again, the wife must be reachable at all times by cell phone. Outings with male friends, either married or single, are not permitted. Outings with mixed company, a girlfriend and her partner, for example, may be permitted at Husband’s discretion. Husband will plan regular, fun nights out with wife to bond as a couple and spend time outside the home without the children, and will endeavor to limit late nights at work.

  Nighttime Availability:

  As soon as the children are asleep, the wife is considered wholly sexually available, and remains sexually available until the children are awake again. This availability is assumed and not asked for. The Husband may or may not make use of his wife, but she is to be prepared for usage either way. Details of the wife’s sexual duties are explained in greater detail in the Sexual Service section.

  When the Husband is out of town, the wife is to check in nightly before bed (prior to 11 o’clock). At this time, if Husband desires, she will engage in phone sex. At the conclusion of the phone conversation or phone sex, Husband may direct his wife to insert a dildo or butt plug or both (if not already inserted during phone sex) and wear the required hardware all night to remind her that her body is his, even when he is not available to make use of her holes. The wife will sleep with the phone by her bedside in case Husband wants to reach her overnight. In the rare event that wife is out of town without Husband, she will adhere to these same requirements as much as possible, and is responsible for taking along the equipment she will need to comply.

  Social Life and Friendships

  The Husband and wife will endeavor to make like-minded friends with other couples and live a fun, social life.

  Female Friends:

  The Husband will allow the wife to make friends he is not personally familiar with (ie, moms at school, online friends) as long as they are female. The Husband will trust the wife to use good judgment in choosing female friends that are supportive, moral, and trustworthy. The wife will avoid befriending women who are disrespectful, loose, or offensive in manner or dress.

  Male Friends:

  Male friends will be permitted only if the correspondence and interaction with such males is project or career related. C
asual male friends are not permitted unless they are trusted and well-known friends of the Husband.

  Online Friends:

  The Husband will be provided with a regularly updated list of all internet sites the wife visits and chats on, with current password, nicknames, user IDs, etc, and the email addresses at which notifications are received. Visiting sites unknown to Husband, chatting under secret IDs, or maintaining secret email accounts is a serious breach of trust and will be considered a Level 3 offense.

  Keeping of the Home

  The Husband will work very hard to provide a safe and beautiful home in which the wife can serve him and raise the children. The wife will show her appreciation for this kindness by being a conscientious and careful housekeeper.

  The Harmonious Home:

  The Husband will endeavor, as much as possible, to leave the stresses of the outside world at the door. The Husband will treat the wife with patience and kindness at all times, and not vent frustrations on the children or wife.

  In turn, the wife will be expected to greet the Husband promptly upon arrival, putting aside any inane tasks in order to graciously welcome him home.

  Housework:

  The wife is expected to keep a clean and well-organized home. The Husband does not wish to micromanage these areas, but expects household tasks to be conscientiously and routinely done. Returning home from work to find the house a shambles due to the wife wasting time online or due to poor time management will be considered a Level 1 offense. Shoddy keeping of the house and inconveniences to Husband (un-ironed clothes, dirty kitchen or bathrooms, children late for school) will also result in Level 1 discipline, unless the wife is not inclined to quickly correct the problem, in which case Level 2 discipline will be applied.

 

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