Miss Demeanor

by Beth Rinyu

  “Alex? Answer me!”

  “Just forget it.”

  “No, I won’t! You obviously think that about me or you wouldn’t have said that.” She placed her hand under my chin, lifting my head until our eyes met. “You know me, and you know I value honesty more than anything in this world. I’d never lie about you being my boyfriend to someone if I didn’t feel that way.”

  I nodded, wishing I didn’t open up this whole conversation with her.

  “Alex, I mean it,” she reiterated.

  “Okay.”

  “Are we okay? Because it sure doesn’t feel like it. Ever since I mentioned about that guy earlier, you’ve been distant.”

  “I have? Because based on the last few hours, I don’t see how much closer I could’ve gotten to you.”

  “That’s not what I mean!” Her frustration was evident. “I meant emotionally. It’s like you’re zoned out or something.”

  “No, Rose, that would be you.” Damn it. I couldn’t just agree with her and leave well enough alone.

  She backed away and narrowed her eyes. “What the hell? How am I being emotionally distant with you?”

  She wasn’t gonna let this go, so I had no other choice but to lay it on the line even though I was pretty sure it was going to end up in a fight. “Just with everything. I buy you a birthday present and you act like it’s a bomb. I take care of you when you’re not feeling good, and you feel the need to repay me for it. I do these things because I want to. I don’t expect anything in return because that’s the type of stuff you do for someone you care about. Someone who has you feeling things you never felt before, and someone you’re not afraid to say you’re in a committed relationship with.”

  Tears welled in her eyes and quickly became a steady stream down her face. I knew I had said too much, given up way too many of my feelings for her, but I was done with the games we so frequently played in the past of always trying to have the upper hand.

  “I-I…” She pulled in her bottom lip and wiped her tear-stained face with her hand. “You know, I feel the same way about you and about us, Alex.”

  I knew she wasn’t lying just gauging by her reaction. I just wanted her to know it was okay to say it.

  “It’s just…sometimes, I look at us…and I feel like it’s not real. Like it’s some backward fairy tale, where I’ll eventually lose my prince, and it scares me. So sometimes it’s easier for me to put up my guard to try and soften the blow if it does happen.”

  I wrapped my arms around her, wishing she could see that breaking her heart was the last thing I ever intended on doing.

  Chapter 43

  ___________________

  Rose

  CHRISTMAS HAD COME AND gone, and Alex and I were another month into our relationship. A new year was about to begin in just a few hours, and my resolution was to be more open with Alex about how I was feeling and let him know I trusted him with my heart. I knew how strong my feelings were for him, it was just so hard for me to express them.

  We had spent our first Christmas together and it was everything I’d hoped for and more. In addition to my emotional transformation in the coming year, I also had two special birthdays coming up in January, first my aunt’s and then Alex’s. I was throwing my aunt a surprise party as a thank you for letting me stay with her and for always being there when I needed her. Alex was going to be a little tougher. I wanted to do something extra special for him, but I hadn’t a clue as to what. I was hoping it would come to me all of a sudden. Whatever it was, I wanted it to be meaningful and memorable, the same way he had made my birthday for me.

  Alex and I were going to be spending the night ringing in the New Year at his place. He was cooking me dinner, and I had never been so excited to just do nothing on New Year’s Eve as I was about this one. The past years had always been the same thing, going out with my friends, getting wasted and partying all night long, then waking up the next day feeling like I’d been run over by a train. I’d grown up so much in just a few short months, and I never wanted to go back to that irresponsible party girl I once was.

  I spent the afternoon writing out the invitations for my aunt’s party and then snuck into her closet and found her old photos so I could put together a video for her. I sat on my bed going through each one, laughing at her ever-changing hairstyles over the years. Some of them good. Some of them very bad. I placed all the ones I had wanted into a pile, stopping when I heard my phone ding with a text message.

  Alex: Are you standing me up?

  “Oh, shit!” I whispered, just noticing the time and realizing I was supposed to have been at his place for dinner five minutes ago.

  Me: I’m so sorry! I got wrapped up going through old pictures. I’m leaving right now.

  I grabbed the pile of photos and put them in my nightstand drawer, coming up with a whole new vocabulary of profanities when I dropped the box with the remaining photos on the floor. I bent down and threw them in the box, slowing down my pace and eyeing up one in particular that caught my eye. It was a picture of a much younger Aunt Kate with her arm around a very familiar-looking man. I studied it closer, trying to put the pieces together as to where I’d seen him before. I placed the photo on the nightstand and picked up the others, placing them in the box and shoving them under the bed.

  I put on my coat and flung my overnight bag over my shoulder, grabbing the picture from the nightstand and looking it over once again. My eyes widened when it finally dawned on me where I’d seen this man before. He was the older British man in Mr. Andrews’ office that day. He was a lot younger in that photograph, but there was no doubt it was him—just a little more handsome and a lot less distinguished than he was now. My mind was going at warp speed as I tried putting together the fuzzy memories of our brief meeting that day. Unfortunately, his egoistical son was who I had the strongest recollection of. I didn’t have time to ponder it at that moment. Alex was waiting, and in addition to wanting to see him, I was also starving, so I shoved the picture in my bag and was on my way.

  _______________

  “I’m so sorry.” I walked over to Alex and kissed him on the cheek just as he was taking the filet mignons and shrimp off the stove. “Oh my God, that smells so good!” I said, sucking in the heavenly aroma.

  “You’re lucky, it took longer to cook than I thought.” He tried his hardest to pretend he was annoyed by my tardiness, but he wasn’t doing a good job of it.

  I won him over when I looped my arms around his neck. “I’ll make it up to you.”

  He couldn’t hold back his smile, playfully smacking my ass and moving me out of the way.

  We sat down to dinner, and I was pleasantly surprised to find it tasted as good as it smelled.

  “Wow, cute, sexy, and you can cook. I’m a lucky girl.” I winked.

  “Yeah, and don’t you forget it.”

  After dinner we cuddled up on the couch watching movies. It was only ten o’clock, and my eyes were weighing heavy as I rested my head on his shoulder.

  “You sure you don’t want to meet up with Lucy and Declan?” Alex asked.

  “Nope. I’m perfectly happy sitting right here on this couch under this blanket with you.”

  “Wow! That’s a switch from your normal social butterfly self.”

  “What can I say? Maybe I’m getting old.”

  He rested his lips on the top of my head, and I closed my eyes, feeling so content in knowing there was no place else I’d rather be at that moment than with him.

  “Or maybe for the first time ever, I finally feel like I’m where I belong with the person I most want to be with.”

  “And who would that person be?” he teased.

  I lifted my head from his shoulder and gazed into his eyes.

  “You.”

  A beautiful smile spread across his face as he moved his lips closer to mine and our tongues collided. I creased my eyebrows when he abruptly ended our kiss and stood up, my confusion transforming into a smile when he took my hand and led me i
nto his bedroom.

  Our lips came together once again as we fell down on his bed, slowly removing each layer of clothing from the other until we were completely undressed. His hands explored my body in a way I’d grown so pleasantly accustomed to. A way that made time stand still and made me wonder how I ever existed before I had met him. Each and every time we were together was both familiar and new. He was able to make me feel things both physically and emotionally with just a simple touch. I always knew the difference between just sex and making love, but I’d never experienced the latter until Alex came along.

  I arched my back as he eased himself inside of me, and our bodies became one, moving together in unison to reach that high we were both chasing. Our tongues clashed, and my fingernails glided down his back. Each thrust he made became more intense than the last. His breathing hitched, and he let out a pleasurable groan at the same time I allowed myself to give in, both of us getting lost in each other together. He turned on his side and pulled me closer as I rested my head on his chest. His heartbeat was like a melody that sounded like it was created just for me. I’d never felt so connected to anyone before in my life and even though I was the happiest I’d ever been, I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing.

  “Hey, why are your crying?” he asked upon feeling the first teardrop falling onto his chest.

  “I don’t know. I’m just happy, I guess.”

  “You guess?”

  “No. I know. I’m one hundred percent without a doubt very happy.”

  We lay in silence for some time, my fingers trailing up and down his arm, until I heard his breathing pattern change. I carefully lifted my head from his chest and watched him sleep, thinking how different my life would be right now if my father hadn’t come up with his ultimatum that landed me in the arms of this man I cared for so deeply. Staring at the big red 11:59 on the clock, I couldn’t help but laugh to myself. Here I thought I’d be the one who wouldn’t make it to midnight, but instead it was Alex who was sleeping like a baby. I kept my eyes on the clock as I lowered my head once again and hugged him as tight as I possibly could. The numbers on the clock switched to 12:00 at the same time, “I love you,” fell from my lips in a soft, gentle whisper meant for the man lying sound asleep beside me.

  Chapter 44

  ___________________

  Alex

  I ROLLED OVER IN BED, opening my eyes to darkness. My brain took a few seconds to process before I realized Rose wasn’t lying beside me. Glancing at the clock to find it was 4:00 a.m., I immediately sat up, wondering where she’d gone. I got out of bed, slipped on a pair of sweatpants, and ventured out in the living room.

  “What are you doing out here?” I asked Rose as she sat on the couch under a blanket, staring at something on her phone.

  “Oh, I couldn’t sleep. My stomach was bothering me, so I just came out to get a drink of water and then my mind started going in a million different directions, and here I am, wide awake!”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Just my stomach, but it’s good now.”

  “No, I mean why’s your mind going in a million different directions?” I asked, taking a seat next to her.

  She looked away, clearly having an internal battle with whether she should tell me or not. “Right before I came over, I was going through some of my aunt’s old photos and I found this.”

  She handed me the picture that was sitting beside her of a man and a woman. The rest was too hard to make out in the darkness.

  “Who is it?” I asked.

  “I know you’re gonna tell me to stop meddling, but I just need to know…”

  “Need to know what?”

  “That’s my aunt and the older English guy who was in your uncle’s office that day. Judging by this picture, I’d say it was taken well over twenty years ago.”

  I studied it closer, still unable to make it out clearly, not that I would’ve probably even been able to in the light with being from so many years ago. I couldn’t even remember what that guy looked like in present day let alone recognize him from the past.

  “How do you know that’s him for sure? You only saw him for a minute in my uncle’s office and that picture looks like it’s pretty old.”

  “I got a good look at him in that minute’s time. He may have been older, but he was quite handsome.”

  “Oh, like father, like son?” The words slipped out before I could even stop them.

  “Really, Alex, we’re gonna go there again with this?” she snapped. “I have no interest in the son. I couldn’t even tell you what the son looked like, if you were to ask me, that’s how much attention I paid to him! So, please stop with that!” Her voice cracked.

  “Fine. Then should I be worried that you have a thing for older men?”

  She rolled her eyes. “The only person I have a thing for is you, but if you keep it up that thing may disappear.”

  “So, what if it is that guy in the photo, what are you trying to achieve?”

  “If he’s an old friend of my aunt’s, wouldn’t it be nice for me to invite him to her party and surprise her?”

  “I’d just leave it well enough alone. If he was an old friend, then maybe there’s a reason why they’re not in touch anymore.”

  “Do you think maybe you could ask your uncle?”

  “Rose, really? Just stop. Look, I know you want to make this party perfect for your aunt, but don’t go digging up the past trying to do it.”

  “Yeah, but—”

  I shook my head to stop her from going any further with this ridiculous plan.

  “Fine.” She relented. “But you better not be telling me not to go through with it just because you don’t like the son.”

  “Oh, I don’t like the son…AT ALL, but that’s not why I’m telling you not to do it. I just think you should have the people you know your aunt wants there for sure, not some guy who she may or may not have been linked to in the past just because you found an old picture.”

  “Okay.” She huffed, still not seeming one hundred percent sold on my advice.

  “Are you tired yet?” I asked, hoping she’d say yes. I was feeling like I could fall back asleep at any moment.

  “Yeah, I think I am.”

  I stood up and took her hand, pulling her off the couch.

  She stopped just as we reached the bedroom door and looked up at me. Her big brown eyes were wide and alert without a hint of sleepiness in them. “Happy New Year,” she whispered, standing on her tippy toes and placing a soft kiss on my cheek.

  I smiled just thinking of all the possibilities and change this new year could bring. I was totally putting the past behind me and moving forward with the girl I’d least expected to. I pulled her into a hug and rested my lips on her head, inhaling the familiar scent of her shampoo. This was going to be a very happy new year for sure.

  _______________

  Six days into the new year and things weren’t going as happy as I planned. Work was crazy busy, which was a good thing. Three new advertisers had signed on with the magazine, and I had meetings set up with two others. I was leaving in the morning for a fishing trip to Costa Rica for a few days that I’d foolishly agreed to go on with my father. I was working nonstop trying to get everything done before I left while missing Rose in the process. The only times I saw her in the past few days was in passing in the hallway or when she’d come in and try to have a quick conversation with me. I was so wrapped up in work, I was barely paying attention, and now I was feeling a little guilty over that. I knew she understood, but I wanted to make it up to her. Now that things were quieting down somewhat, I was hoping to do just that. I sent out the last email for the day, forcing myself to shut down my computer and call it a night, and maybe take Rose out for a late dinner. I gathered my things and headed out, surprised to see the light on in my uncle’s office.

  “I didn’t know you were still here?” I said as I stood in the doorway.

  “Yeah, I just wanted to go over some things.” He looked exhau
sted.

  “Anything I can help you with?” I asked.

  “Just going over some financials, getting ready for the dreaded tax time.”

  “Everything okay?”

  “Yeah, everything’s fine. Better than fine. Thanks to you and Rose, our profit is up twenty percent from last year. I knew good things would come out of the two of you finally working together.” A broad smile stretched across his face. “I got the invitation to Kate’s party. I’m assuming you’ll be there as well?”

  “Yeah. Unfortunately, I couldn’t talk Rose out of her roaring twenties theme, so you’ll have to dress for the occasion.”

  “She’s a stubborn girl. When she gets her mind made up about something, there’s no changing it.” He chuckled.

  “Ha! Don’t I know it!” I was just about to get up when Rose’s little investigation popped into my head. “Hey, Uncle Henry. Was Rose’s aunt friendly with that guy you had in your office that day with his son?”

  He jerked his head from the paper he had been concentrating on so intently. “Why do you ask that?”

  “Rose was going through old pictures and she found one of the two of them, and of course her mind started working and she wanted to invite him to the party. I told her to leave the past—”

  “No, trust me, Alex. Whatever you do, please make sure she doesn’t pursue that.” His voice was laced with a hint of panic.

  “Okay, fine. But why?”

  “It’s not my place to say. Just please promise me you’ll talk her out of it.”

  “I think I already did. At least she said she wasn’t going to. But like you said, she’s very stubborn.”

  His face was etched with concern, which now had my curiosity piqued ever so slightly. But I knew my uncle all too well. He wasn’t going to give out any information. I was so much like him in that sense. If it didn’t concern me, I stayed out of it. Neither one of us liked to pry in other people’s business the way some people would get off on doing. So as much as I wanted to know somewhat, I knew he’d never divulge anything. It was just as well. I didn’t want to know something about Rose’s aunt that I wouldn’t be able to share with Rose. I’d just leave it be and hope Rose would heed my advice and not investigate anymore. Whatever it was, it was in the past and didn’t involve her anyway.