Need to Love You

by Megan Smith

  Renee opens the door wider for me. “Grab your stuff and come with me.”

  Walking back over I grab all my things and then follow Renee down the hall. We pass by a few offices, some doors are open, some are closed, and some people are talking loud while others are whispering. The office is bright with all the windows, the atmosphere feels good and everyone I make eye contact with smiles. I can see myself fitting in here.

  Renee makes a right into a huge office that is shared with four other ladies. Each has their own cubicle area and even with them in here the room still looks big enough to fit another four people in it. “If you do get hired this is where you will be working.” Renee says just above a whisper as to not disrupt the girls on the phone. “The conference room is back here.”

  I continue following behind her to the back of the room where another door is. She opens it and allows me to step in first. “Wow, this is nice.” The room is painted a light grey, the conference table is made out of all glass, there are ten black chairs around it, a huge television is mounted to the wall and a single keyboard sits in the center of the table.

  “This is where most of the internal meetings happen. We have another conference room up front if we need to bring clients in,” Renee explains.

  I set the clipboard down on the table and take a seat in a chair. “So can you give me any pointers for the interview?”

  She smiles and places a hand on her stomach. “Just relax and be yourself. If you’re the same Chloe from high school, everyone here will love you.”

  I return her smile. “Thank you.”

  “Of course,” Renee takes a seat a cross from me. “So tell me what you have been up to since high school. I assume you still live in the area? Are you with Jackson?”

  Of course she’d ask about Jackson. I try not to frown so I do what my mother used to always say to me, ‘Turn that frown upside down.’ “Yes, I live not too far from where my parents live. Jackson and I are still together,” I’m not telling her that my marriage is falling to shit right now. “I’ve actually been lucky enough to be a stay-at-home mom and take care of our five year old son, Alex. He just started kindergarten this year so I thought it was time to actually get out there in the grown up world.”

  Renee rubs her stomach. “That’s awesome that you were able to stay home with him. I’d love to do the same thing but I can’t stay away from this place. Half my life is here.”

  “It’s seems like a nice place to work.”

  “It is. Like I told you on the phone I was able to get in here right after high school as a file clerk while I went to Rowan University. When I graduated I was promoted to a legal assistant and then shortly after that another door opened and I’m now one of two legal secretaries. As I’m sure you have kind of put two and two together there are four attorneys here at the firm, Michael Taylor, Sam Lee, Ben Harris and Ethan Miller. They all grew up together, went to the same college and when they were finished they opened up The Law Offices of Taylor, Lee, Harris and Miller LLC.” Renee grabs the keyboard and types in a password, then she goes to the firm’s website and clicks on the about us. “Here is Michael and Sam.” She scrolls down a little bit more. “And finally, Ben and Ethan. We have two paralegals, who you passed out there, two legal secretaries and a file clerk. Each person is basically assigned two lawyers.” Renee glances back over to me. “Am I overwhelming you?”

  I am a little wide eyed trying to take in all this information but it’s a good thing. The more I know the better off I am. “No, not at all, I’m just taking it all in.”

  “Good, just trying to help you get a foot in the door. Lisa, the human resource manager, will be coming in any minute. She’s nice so you’ll have no problems with her. Now, the only thing I will give you a heads up on is Ben Harris. He can be a real dick at times.” I try not to laugh but when she looks from the television to me with a smile I can’t help it. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said that,” she laughs.

  “I’m just thankful for the warning.”

  “He comes off as a bit of a hard ass, he’s anything but. Since your position is going to be helping both teams there may come a time that you have to work on something for him. He likes order and everything to be cut and dry. If he doesn’t like something that you do, trust me, you’ll know,” she giggles. “I screwed up a last name once when I was in the middle of doing something important for Ethan but Ben told me I had to stop because this couldn’t wait. He marched his ass over to my desk before I even took my coat off and laid into me about it. Then I laid right back into him and we’ve been best friends since,” she sighs. “What I’m trying to say is don’t let him intimidate you.”

  Before I can even thank her again for more information, a knock sounds on the door. “Must be Lisa,” Renee stands, goes over to the door to open it. An older lady with brown hair that is grey around the hairline walks in.

  “Lisa, this is my friend Chloe,” Renee winks at me. “I’ll leave you two to it.”

  “Thanks,” Lisa says, “Mr. Harris asked that I summon his pregnant wife to her desk to kick up her feet. He said you had five minutes or he was sending you home for the day.”

  Renee shakes her head. “He’s bossy too,” she says to me before smiling and walking out.

  “Well, now that that’s out of the way I can move on to what they really pay me for around here,” Lisa takes the seat that Renee was just sitting in. “So you’re friends with Mrs. Harris?”

  Now the puzzle pieces all fit together, Renee is married to Ben. Guess that’s what she meant by now they are best friends.

  “Yes, Renee and I went to high school together.”

  “You’ve known each other a while then,” she speculates.

  I clear my throat. “We actually lost contact after we graduated but I think we’ll be fixing that now.”

  “That’s good. Renee needs to get out of the office a little more,” she winks before grabbing a piece of paper off the table.

  I glance down forgetting that I didn’t finish up the application just yet. “I, uh…just need another minute to finish this up.”

  Lisa waves her hand. “No worries.”

  A take the next few minutes to get the form filled out while she reads over what I’m assuming is my sorry ass excuse of a resume. It’s barely a page long and it could be read in mere seconds but she’s being kind and giving me time to finish the application.

  When I’m done I set the pen down. “All finished.” I slide it across the table to Lisa.

  She reaches for it to glance over it before setting it back down on top of my resume. “I hate to be intrusive, please feel free to tell me it’s none of my business, but are you related to—”

  I interrupt her. “To Mason and Cooper Cahill?”

  The corner of Lisa’s mouth hangs down. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to pry. My son is a huge Mason fan.”

  I smile letting her know it’s okay. “I get asked that a lot around here. You’re not prying at all and to answer your question, yes, I’m related to the Cahills. I’m married to their old brother Jackson.”

  “Again, I’m sorry, that was out of line.”

  “Not at all.”

  “Okay, back to the reason why you’re here. I see that you’ve been a stay-at-home mom since graduating high school and you’re now looking for a full-time job?”

  I hold my hands on top of the table. “Yes, now with my son in school I’m looking for a career. I know that I don’t have experience in anything law related but I’m a quick learner.”

  “It says here that you’re familiar with Microsoft Office, correct?”

  “Word, Excel, and Outlook, not so much on Publisher or PowerPoint but I could take some online classes and learn if needed.”

  “Those three are enough for now.” She looks back down to the application. “You have transportation to and from work? You’ll have childcare for your son since you’ll be working until five?”

  “I have my own car and I’ll be having Alex attend an afte
r school program until we can pick him up.” Make a mental note to do this.

  Lisa continues to ask me a few more questions and before I know it the interview is over. She stands and pushes in her chair. “Well, it was very nice meeting you, Chloe. Please stop by Jesse’s desk on your way out to schedule a time to come in and meet Mr. Harris and Mr. Miller.”

  I reach across to table with my hand outstretched. “Thank you very much for your time.”

  “You’re very welcome. I hope it all works out for you here.”

  “Thanks, me too.”

  When Lisa opens the door and Renee peeks her head out of her cubicle. “You’re all done?”

  “Yup, I’m going to make an appointment to meet with Mr. Harris and Mr. Miller.”

  “Nice.” She waits a second for Lisa to walk away before she whispers. “You know you basically have the job, right?”

  “Really?”

  She nods. “You should see poor old Lisa’s office. She’s been following Mason and Cooper’s career for years, even has a picture of Mason giving a ball to her son.”

  “That’s kind of weird.”

  We both laugh until a girl on the phone shoots us a nasty look.

  “Don’t mind Valerie, she hasn’t been laid in a few weeks and is growing cobwebs—” before Renee could finish that sentence a ball of some sort comes flying over my head and hits Renee on the arm.

  “What the hell!” Renee tries to act mad but she’s smiling.

  “I’m sorry could you please hold on for one second.” I hear Valerie say into the phone. “Shut your mouth, you little wench. Just because you’re getting enough for all of us doesn’t mean you get to throw it in our faces.”

  “Amen!” Someone else calls out.

  I start to laugh because this is not at all how I pictured an interview going. I thought for sure it would be an all work, no play type of environment.

  “You’re all just jealous,” Renee says as she leans back checking her nails out.

  “Who’s jealous?” A rich, deep voice says.

  Whipping my head around I see a guy dressed in a dark grey suit, white shirt and a matching grey tie standing in the doorway.

  “They’re jealous of you and me, baby.” Renee’s voice comes out like a purr.

  The guy clears his throat, glances around and then his eyes land on mine. His cheeks flush and then he diverts his eyes to his wife. “Renee…”

  She glances at him and then glances at me. “This is Chloe, the one I told you about?”

  He nods his head once. “Well get back to work. I heard you all from down the hall.”

  Renee solutes him, “Yes, sir.”

  All the girls snicker.

  “I better let you get back to work,” I say adjusting my purse on my shoulder.

  “Okay, I’ll see you when you come back in.”

  “Okay, talk to you later.”

  I walk out of the office, down the hallway and back to Jesse who I first met when I walked in. I set up my appointment to come back tomorrow morning at the same time I did today to meet with Mr. Harris and Mr. Miller. I make it all the way to my car before I finally squeal in excitement. I know I shouldn’t get my hopes up but I have a good feeling about this job.

  Jackson

  These last three weeks have been the longest of my life.

  I want Chloe back. I want my son back living under my roof again too. I had to hear from my mom that my wife got a great job working at some law firm. That’s all I know. I have no idea where it is, the name of it, if she likes it, nothing. I hadn’t even been told that Alex was now enrolled in an after school program. Apparently a bus picks him up and takes him to a daycare type of place for about two hours. When I found out from Alex after I picked him up from my parents I was pissed. I called Chloe after I got Alex set up on the Xbox at home.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you put Alex in daycare?”

  “Hang on.” A few seconds later she’s back. “I’ve barely spoken to you at all, Jackson. Why would I reach out to you about sending him to a daycare? It’s not a big deal. You’re at work when I need someone to watch him anyway.”

  “You still should have told me. I’m his dad no matter what and I get a say in what goes on in his life.”

  Chloe sighs. “I’m at work and I’m not fighting with you. If you don’t want him in daycare then you need to pick him up from school at three-fifteen every day.”

  “I know what time he gets done at school,” I snap. She also knows that there is no way for me to pick him up either.

  “Look, I’ve got to go.”

  “Of course you do.”

  “You have Alex there. Go spend time with him; he doesn’t need to hear us fighting.”

  “Chloe, we have to talk about all this. You can’t just cut me out of your life. I’m still your husband for Christ’s sake.”

  She doesn’t answer right away and just as I think she’s hung up on me she says, “I’m working on some things for me for once. I know we have to talk, and we will but just give me some time, alright?”

  “How much time, Chloe? It’s already been three weeks and we’ve barely said a handful of words to each other.”

  “I don’t know,” she whispers. “I just got this job. I’m trying to keep up with everything they are handing me and also taking care of Alex too,” Chloe sniffles. “I can’t handle anything else right now, Jackson.”

  Sitting down in a chair at the kitchen table I drop my head back looking up at the ceiling. I won’t admit to her that she just dug a knife deep into my chest.

  “Jackson?”

  “I’ll talk to you later.” I hang up before she even has a chance to say anything else.

  After a few minutes of getting my shit together I head out into the living room where Alex is. “Hey, you want to go to the batting cages for a little while?”

  Never in my life have I seen Alex jump to do anything until now. “Yes! Are Uncle Cooper and Uncle Mason coming too?”

  I shake my head. “Nah, just us kiddo.”

  Alex grabs his glove that is laying near the fireplace that Mason gave to him. “Can we eat pizza there too?”

  “If that’s what you want to do.”

  Chloe may not be able to deal with our marriage right now but I’m going to prove to at least Alex that I’m worth putting the effort into.

  Friday afternoon, I’m elbows deep in car parts fixing a blown head gasket in a Honda. A lady pulled into the parking lot yesterday with white smoke coming out of the exhaust and coolant pouring underneath her car. The guys and I were out back when she came in. We all took bets on who would get assigned to the job. I was the lucky winner.

  “Yo, killer,” Mark says, as he leans in checking out what I’m doing.

  “What’s up?”

  “What are you up to tonight? A couple of us are going out for happy hour after work. I think the new girl up front might be coming too.”

  He thinks by telling me that that I’ll change my mind about coming. I tighten up one of the bolts before reaching into the tin container for another one. “I’ve got something I’ve got to take care of tonight.” I don’t even feed into the new girl bullshit. Don’t have the time or fucks to give right about now.

  “Yeah, right,” Mark reaches under the car for the bolt I just dropped. “You’ve been blowing us off the last couple of times. What’s up with that?”

  I sit up to wipe my hands on a rag. “I’ve just been busy.”

  Mark looks around before asking, “You still having problems with Chloe?”

  He’s the only guy who knows that Chloe and Alex moved out. He had stopped over one night to shoot the shit and he asked where she was. I told him the truth and asked that he not say anything to anyone. “Yeah,” and that’s all I say about it. I’m not in the mood to think about her or the fact that her words from the other night still sting.

  “Gotcha.”

  I look back at the job that I’m working on knowing I’ll be staying late and getting some
overtime in. I texted my mom to let her know I got held up at work late and to let Alex know I’ll see him in the morning. After seeing his face light up at the batting cages the other night I promised we could spend the whole weekend together and go again. I didn’t bother to ask or even tell Chloe. She doesn’t have the courtesy to let me know things why should I do the same?

  “Well, if you change your mind the offer still stands.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  Mark walks over to the next bay beside mine and starts talking with Rome. I can’t hear all of the conversation with the sounds of the impact guns turning on and off but I hear bits and pieces.

  “What’s the chick’s name again?”

  “Ally, I think. I wasn’t really paying too much attention,” Mark laughs.

  At the mention of the name Ally my ears really perk up. Seriously though, what are the chances of it really being her? Slim to none. I don’t think the big man upstairs could be so cruel by placing us together like this.

  After Joe closes his garage door I can hear fucking dumb and dumber again.

  “Are you down tonight?”

  “Yeah, I just got to stop by the house and grab a quick shower. A fucking brake line blew on me today and I stink.”

  “Alright, check you out later.”

  Now I’m wondering if it really could be her in the office but I quickly shake those thoughts from my head. Who cares if it is anyway? Yeah, she may be able to shed some light on what happened but does it really matter? Chloe can’t even stand to talk to me anymore.

  By the time I finish up the head gasket job it’s almost eight o’clock. I finish up the paperwork noting everything that was done to the car so they can enter it into the system tomorrow morning when they get in.

  On the way home I stop at a pizza store not far from the house to grab a pie, fries and soda. I don’t need to be eating this shit since I haven’t gone to the gym in over a week but I don’t feel like cooking and everything else is way out of the way.

  When I pull up in front of the house I grab everything out of the truck and walk inside. I look down at my hands and decide to take a quick shower before eating and lounging on the couch. I’m only upstairs for maybe twenty minutes when I hear the television turn on. I walk over to the steps and yell down, “Hello?”