Can't Hate You (Second Chance Diaries Book 1)

by Emma Vikes

  I didn’t know this and here I thought I knew a lot about Ryan. But then again, as open as he seemed about everything, he was also a closed book to all of us. Like he was transparent about the obvious, of how his parents never got along and evidently divorced, about his dating style, about his career but none of that really told the whole story about Ryan Bell.

  “You know that guy has been staring at you the entire night,” he murmured quietly to me.

  When I looked up, his gaze was fixed on someone behind me. I craned my neck to see but failed to see his line of sight because of our position.

  Ryan suddenly switched us, gently nodding his head back.

  I spotted a guy sitting on one of the chairs, positioned to face the dance floor.

  I thought I’d seen him in the hospital whenever I dropped by to see Andrew. “What about him?”

  “Well, he’s asking me if I’m close to you which I answered honestly and said that I’d rather be dead than be your best friend,” Ryan stated blatantly, “but he’s been pestering me to hook you up with him.”

  I scoffed, making a face at his words then eyed Ryan, wondering if this was a trick of some sort. “And what did you tell him?”

  “That I’m not a dating agency but if he happens to find one that could also hook me up with a hot girl, he should give me a call.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh and shake my head, switching the position of my arms and comfortably wrapping them around his neck. “You’re an idiot but that was a good save.”

  His hands inched down and slid around my waist. Ryan smiled at me gently, the corners of his lips twitching upward and his lips curving. His green eyes held my gaze and for a fleeting moment.

  I took in how attractive he really was. He had this James Dean vibe going on with him and his successful background added much color to who he was. As much as I hated the game he played, it was understandable why women so easily fell for his charm.

  He cocked his head to the side. “You keep staring at me like that and I might fall hard.”

  I scoffed, knowing that falling for each other wasn’t something that would ever happen with the two of us. “You’re only going to land on hard pavement.”

  “Ooh…” Ryan smirked, spinning me around and when I came back to him, he pulled me closer. “Don’t make it sound like a challenge because I might bite and take it on, shortcake.”

  “You wouldn’t ever be able to handle it,” I said, looking into his emerald eyes. “So don’t even try.”

  6

  Ryan

  The day after Andrew and Mila’s wedding, it finally sunk into my brain that I had no place to stay anymore. Andrew and Mila were moving into Andrew’s house together and although I knew, they wouldn’t really kick me out if I crashed with them for a while, the thought itself made me feel awkward.

  It only came to me after I walked into Andrew’s house. In my wild imagination, I believed I would manage to hook up with one of the bridesmaids that Mila knew or a guest or something. I didn’t expect that I would be coming back alone and absolutely tired.

  I spent the rest of the night by Kate’s side which was actually surprising. After dancing with her, she realized there wasn’t much she was meant to oversee so it was then when she’d decided to have fun. Lois and Bob took Faith home early, so Kate could have her much needed break and she absolutely let herself loose…so loose that I ended up driving her drunk ass home.

  It would either be me or Peter, Andrew’s colleague. The one who’d been eyeing her for a while, itching for an opportunity to ask her out. Ha! As if I’d let someone who had a crush on her take her home while she was inebriated. Kate might see me as an ass but I wasn’t one to take advantage of a drunk woman just because I had the chance.

  Right after taking her home, I went back to Andrew’s place and the moment I stepped in, I realized that he and Mila were coming home to this same house, the following day, as a married couple. It meant that although I could still stay, it didn’t really mean I was truly welcome. But Andrew hadn’t kicked me out yet.

  So when they did came back late this morning, Andrew asked me to come with him to the supermarket to do some grocery shopping for dinner. “Thank you for making sure that Kate went home safe,” he told me while I pushed the grocery cart by his side. “I’m surprised that you two are getting along better now, than you ever did.”

  I shrugged as I grabbed a box of cereal I liked and threw it in the cart.

  Andrew didn’t even bat an eye.

  “We still argue but I think you were right about your whole maturity spiel. Or maybe both of us just stopped nit-picking on each other’s statements and comments.”

  Andrew chuckled and led me to the meat section. He wanted us to have grilled steak for tonight.

  I still hadn’t asked him what was going to happen to me since he and Mila were now married. I had about a month or two here in Tampa for the research I was working on and it didn’t just make sense to bunk in with them. If they were dating, I wouldn’t be too bothered but they were married now and it made me feel like I was invading their personal space.

  “I think Kate’s giving you a chance because Faith likes you.”

  I couldn’t help but smile. Even in the short time since I’d met Faith and spent time with her, I already loved the kid because she was so easy to love. It’s like the moment she smiled at you, she was claiming a piece of your heart for herself and she’d made her claim on mine. I liked spending time with her and when Kate was still sober, I asked her if I could visit Faith on the weekends because I had a soft spot for her kid.

  Surprisingly, Kate said yes and didn’t even set ground rules.

  “Well, who wouldn’t like someone as gorgeous as I am?” I told Andrew with a smirk.

  He glanced at me as he pursed his lips, sighing and shaking his head. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s it and if you ever make that comment in front of my sister, I’m a hundred percent sure that she wouldn’t want you near her kid.”

  I laughed loudly and watched as he set the steak into our cart. “But all kidding aside, I like spending time with the kid.”

  “Maybe because you’re at the age where you should consider having your own,” Andrew teased.

  I rolled my eyes and punched him lightly on the shoulder then continued to get what was on Mila’s list. I think I knew the reason why I was so fond of Faith. I got to do things with her that I used to want to do with my own dad but never had the chance.

  Plus, I didn’t have the responsibilities of a father towards her. It seemed like a win-win.

  By the time we got back to Andrew’s car, I still hadn’t told him that maybe I should get an apartment or rent a room somewhere for a month.

  “Mila and I have a flight to Bora-Bora. We’ll spend a week there and then fly to Hawaii for another week. Both places for our honeymoon since we couldn’t decide which.”

  I looked at Andrew, wondering why he just told me all those details because well, I didn’t really ask. “Why are you telling me this?”

  Andrew chuckled and buckled in his seatbelt. “When I asked you to stay with me for the wedding, I didn’t know that you were planning to finish your research here which meant that you have to stay a while. You know that Mila and I would love to have you around, but if you end up staying here longer than just a month? Well, I’ll be blunt, you might cock-block us, and I’m not too happy with that idea.”

  I laughed, glancing at him while shaking my head. “I was actually going to tell you I was already planning on finding myself a place to stay. But thank you for that heads up and honesty. I hope you have as much wild sex as you can.”

  Andrew managed to punch me on the shoulder before he reversed out of the parking space. “You can stay for two more weeks and have the place for yourself. There’s only one rule that Mila has for you.”

  I leaned my head against the window. “And what would that be?”

  “You’re not allowed to bring girls and have sex in our house, Ryan.” />
  I blinked and almost sputtered in response, “I-is that what you think of me?”

  Andrew stopped at a red light and then gave me a pointed look. “I’m pretty sure you had some intention of bringing a girl last night but you were a little too preoccupied with taking care of my sister.”

  I turned away but couldn’t really hide my amused smile. Both of them knew me a little too well and I wasn’t really sure if this was a good thing or not. “Oh come on, Andrew, cut me some slack. I’m not that bad.”

  “As my sister had brought it up, you authored an instruction manual in high school, a dammed black notebook to help boys get laid.”

  I snickered. “Oh, don’t pin that one on me. You were my co-author. It’s a good thing Kate didn’t bring up that fact or else I’m pretty sure Mila would’ve cancelled the wedding.”

  “I didn’t write the whole thing with you! And besides, it wasn’t as if I had the same style with the girls as you did. Hook-ups and flings weren’t my thing.”

  I rolled my eyes, still snickering as we finally pulled up into the driveway of his house. “Alright. You were the saint between us and I was the devil incarnate. You don’t need to rub it in.”

  A car parked behind us and I caught sight of Kate through the rear-view mirror. I glanced at Andrew. “Are we having a dinner party?”

  He rolled his eyes and then got out of the car.

  I quickly followed behind him and helped him with the groceries just as Kate and Faith got out of their car.

  Faith ran to me, hugging me tight by the waist. “Hi, Ryan!”

  I couldn’t help but smile. I set the groceries down and then crouched in front of Faith, opening my arms so she could give me a hug. She hugged me tightly and I wrapped my arms around her too, kissing the side of her head before letting her go.

  She then hugged her uncle before he complained that she liked me more than him.

  “You still haven’t kicked this one out?” Kate asked as she approached us.

  Faith rushed towards the house now, heading to Mila who’d just opened the front door.

  Kate helped us with the rest of the groceries and the three of us made our way to the house.

  Once we placed everything in the kitchen, I casually dropped my arm around Kate’s shoulder. “If I get kicked out of here, can I bunk in with you? Saves me money.”

  Kate made a face and then shrugged my arm off of her as Mila began to marinate the meat we bought. “I’d rather house a homeless man I found on the street than house you.”

  I pouted but before I could retort, Faith tugged my hand. “Ryan, I brought my bike with me. Can we continue with the lessons?”

  Andrew crossed his arms in front of us. He didn’t really ask me much when I told him I went to Kate’s to apologize, so he had no idea that I’d started to teach Faith how to ride the bike. “He taught you how to ride the bike without the training wheels on?”

  Faith nodded her head eagerly. “Yes! We were supposed to go for another round but Ryan hasn’t visited again.” She was pouting when she said it.

  I couldn’t help but chuckle lightly. I patted her head gently. “I’m sorry but I’ve been busy with work. Let’s have a round while they cook?”

  She cheered and rushed to her mom to get the key for the car, so I could take out the bike there.

  Andrew was eyeing me while I waited. “That’s not fair. I’ll be stuck grilling the steaks while you get to have fun.”

  “Tell you what. We can take turns.” I knew how much Andrew loved spending time with Faith. He stood as her father-figure because he knew she needed one and he did so without complaint. He must’ve been looking forward to teaching her how to ride a bike but he’d been so busy recently, I stepped in.

  Andrew smiled at me gratefully just as Faith arrived and I took her bike from Kate’s car, handed her the key to the car to return to her mother and then brought the bike into the backyard where everyone was. Faith eagerly got on the bike as I steadied it. I guided her all throughout, holding on the back of the seat of the bike and handle.

  When Andrew and I switched and he was the one guiding her, she was already on the verge of riding on her own and when he let her go, she managed to maintain her balance as she shrieked in delight, calling her mother’s attention.

  Kate was quick to record the whole thing on video as she smiled widely and proudly.

  The sight melted my heart.

  When the food was ready, all of us sat on the rectangular garden table set Mila and Andrew had and began to dig in quickly, exchanging conversations about our experience during the wedding.

  When Faith was done eating, she went inside to watch Netflix on TV because it was a little dark for her to continue biking.

  “Wait, so Peter never got your number?” Andrew asked, sipping his beer and looking at Kate.

  She shook her head and then jabbed a thumb in my direction. “He rejected him for me.”

  I almost choked on the bite of steak I took. “What the hell?”

  Kate rolled her eyes but I could see the satisfied smirk on her face because she caught me off-guard. “You told me that Peter liked me and you basically told him to go fuck off.”

  Andrew and Mila were eyeing me with curiosity and leaning closer to hear my defense.

  “If he truly liked you then he would’ve just had the balls to approach you and besides, had he done so, would you have said yes?” I smirked because I knew I’d just turned the tables around and now, all eyes were on her.

  Kate grabbed her bottle of beer, chugged at least half of it and wiped her mouth. “I think there’s no use answering a hypothetical question because I don’t think he’ll ever have the chance to ask me out.”

  “But what if you run into him somewhere and he finds the nerve to ask?” Mila butted in, staring at Kate with curious brown eyes. “Come on, Katie, I’ve tried to set you up on dates with guys from my work and even ones I just know and all of them were already approved by Andrew and yet, you reject each one.”

  “We’re also aware that Vanessa tries to get you out there too,” Andrew chimed in.

  Kate gave her brother a flat look. “A few years ago, you were plotting with this one to ruin my first date.” She pointed at me.

  Andrew rolled his eyes. “You were a teenager at that time, Kate. It’s different now. You’re an adult. Doesn’t it get lonely sometimes?”

  “And don’t even think about using Faith as an excuse,” I added, looking at her pointedly when she turned to glare at me. “I don’t think your daughter would even stop you from dating anyone which means that this is all on you.”

  Kate scoffed. “Didn’t we just have this conversation a few days ago?”

  I recalled the conversation we had at the rehearsal dinner. “We were talking about love. Dating and love are two entirely different things. Getting out there and going fishing for a good catch does not mean that you need to fall in love with the guy the moment you lay eyes on him.”

  Kate groaned and shook her head. “Can we talk about something else other than my non-existent dating life?”

  But I wasn’t really done with the discussion because even when Kate and I were in better terms now, it didn’t mean I wanted to tease her less. “I think the reason why you’ve been rejecting guys is because you’re just scared to get out there.”

  Her eyes were narrowed into slits when she turned to look at me.

  I could see the familiar fire of annoyance in her gaze, the fire that I hadn’t seen in a while because we’d been having decent conversations.

  “What do you even want with me, Ryan?” she snapped.

  I chuckled. “Nothing, shortcake. I’m just curious why you haven’t been out there. It’s been seven years, hasn’t it? Have you dated anyone in that length of time? Maybe you’re scared of getting out there or wait… maybe you’re just scared that if you happen to like the guy you’re dating, he wouldn’t like you. Rejection can be a pain.” I knew I was pressing on her buttons judging by the way she glare
d at me.

  “If I went on a date, would you shut up about it?”

  My smirk grew wider at her suggestion. “If you only went on one, it doesn’t really count as you getting out there and trying. If you already have it in your head that the person wouldn’t like you or you wouldn’t like him, it’s pretty useless from there.”

  Kate pursed her lips and then turned to face Mila seriously. “Fine. Mila will set me up with three blind dates, all of which will be of her choosing. I’m sure she can set me up with someone even when she’s in a different place and I wouldn’t be fussy about it. I won’t make up an excuse. I’ll show up.”

  My brows shot up in surprise.

  Andrew and Mila looked the same way. Mila had to ask if Kate was really up to it and she nodded in assurance.

  Her grim determination to prove me wrong was actually admirable and I found myself chuckling, raising my beer towards her, waiting for her to clink bottles with mine. “To finally fishing the ocean for a good catch.”

  7

  Kate

  Maybe I shouldn’t have gotten ahead of myself and allow Ryan’s constant jabs at my lack of dating life to affect me. But all was said and done. Mila and Andrew were already off to Bora-Bora for their honeymoon. With that said, Mila left everything in Vanessa’s hands, so I couldn’t find a way out of it.

  It’d been three days since the agreement and two since Vanessa found out. Each time she came over for a video, she had this constant mischievous glint in her eyes. It reminded me of the number of failed dates she’d set me up with in high school.

  I knew Mila would be the one to choose and that Andrew had a say in it. The idea still freaked me out though.

  “Tune in on my next video for a big announcement and I swear, you’re not gonna be ready for it! God, we’ve already shot the video and it’s so extra and I wish I could tell you what it is right now…” I pouted and then let out an exaggerated sigh and shrug. “But ya’ll are going to have to wait for the next upload. I’ll see you then. Bye guys, stay safe, drink water, I love you!”