Finding a Hart

by Kay Gordon

  “Yeah, look at me. I still don’t know how to handle a baby, hence your presence here.”

  She shook her head and uncapped her water. “Every parent has this moment, Jared. You are doing a great job.”

  “God, I hope so.”

  An embarrassed smile slid along her face. “I hope you don’t mind what I did with him earlier. It was pretty inappropriate of me to pull down my shirt but in the hospital, before we knew he had anyone else, he and I did a lot of skin-to-skin that newborns crave.”

  “No, it was perfect.” I didn’t mind. If anything, I was jealous. I wasn’t sure if I was jealous that she was able to have that ability to soothe Chris or if I was jealous that Chris got to press up against her chest. I cleared my throat, my turn to be slightly embarrassed. “I googled ways to comfort an inconsolable baby earlier and it said that familiar smells can soothe them. I think you’re that for him, Steph. You’ve spent more time with my son than anyone.”

  “I don’t know about that but I’m happy I could help anyway. You’re going to be his comfort soon enough.”

  I hoped so but at the same time, the thought made me sad. It was obvious that Stephanie and Chris had some sort of connection and I didn’t want that to go away. If I was being honest, Chris wasn’t the only one who had a connection with her. I couldn’t help wondering what would have happened if I had asked her out weeks ago. Would we still be at a ‘just friends’ standstill because of the baby or would we be in a completely different position?

  Silence settled over both of us and I closed my eyes. Being just friends would be much easier to come to terms with if the need to touch her wasn’t so damn overwhelming. Especially now, when we were just inches apart on the loveseat, my hands wanted to reach out to her.

  “So, I know you’re in marketing thanks to the information I collected for your file but what do you do exactly?”

  I turned my head so I could look at her. “I’m the director of the creative team here. It was a big step up from being a lackey in Michigan and I love it.”

  “Isn’t thirty-one a little young to be a director?” She offered me a teasing smile and I smirked.

  “Maybe. I would like to think that means I’m good at it.”

  “I’m sure you are,” she agreed. “It’s nice that they’re letting you work from home, too.”

  I nodded and looked up at the ceiling. “Well, I’m off-off this week to get adjusted and next week I’ll have to make myself presentable for lots of video calls. Hopefully Chris and I can come to an understanding about those.”

  “Good luck. Babies aren’t that agreeable, though. If you’re ever in a bind and you need help, call. If I can, I will. My office is pretty close.”

  “Thanks, Steph.” I just smiled again and we settled back into silence.

  I felt so comfortable with that woman, maybe too comfortable. My eyes started to droop against my will and I felt Stephanie nudge me with her foot.

  “You should sleep while you can.”

  “I think you’re right,” I responded as a large yawn overtook my face. Stephanie stood from the loveseat and offered me her hand. I took it immediately and she broke our connection as soon as I was on my feet.

  “Can I use your bathroom really quick?” she asked as we walked out to the hall and I nodded as I pointed to a door to the right.

  I continued to the living room and propped myself up on the arm on the couch. With the condo blissfully silent, I could feel the exhaustion settling into my bones. I also knew that Chris would probably be up in an hour or two to eat and wanted to groan.

  Stephanie emerged from the hallway with a smile, her sweater back on, and she grabbed her bag from where she’d placed it on the couch earlier. “Remember to try and stay calm because it keeps him calm. And I’ll still see you Thursday for the official visit, okay?”

  “Okay.” I grinned and shoved my hands into the pockets of my pajama pants. “Thank you so much.”

  “No need to thank me. You can call me anytime for anything.” She handed me something suddenly, and a pink tinge hit her cheeks when I realized what it was.

  The brown shirt she’d been wearing under her sweater.

  She shrugged with a slight eye roll, trying to belay her embarrassment. “Maybe he does remember me. At the very least, it could be worth a shot and can’t hurt, right?”

  “Right.” I clutched the shirt in one hand and moved towards Stephanie. Without thinking about it, I wrapped my free arm around her in a tight hug. “Thank you.”

  She returned my embrace lightly, as if she were uncomfortable, so I released her quickly and stepped back. To avoid letting the moment get awkward, I hurried to the intercom and pressed the call button.

  “Good evening, Mr. Hart.”

  “Hey, Angelo. Stephanie is on her way back down.”

  “Yes, sir. I’ll bring her car around immediately.”

  I thanked him and walked with Stephanie to the door. She smiled before stepping into the hallway.

  “Good luck.”

  I chuckled and nodded slightly. “Thanks. I’m going to need it. Goodnight, Steph.”

  “Goodnight, Jared.”

  I stayed at the door as she waited for the elevator and when she got in, our eyes met. She held up her hand in a wave and I grinned at her as the doors closed. Once she was out of sight, I stepped back inside and locked up.

  I was tired. It was the only explanation I had for why I lifted her shirt to my nose and inhaled a deep breath.

  It smelled just like her. The scent was enough to relax me and light my blood on fire at the same time.

  Jesus. I needed to sleep.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Stephanie

  As soon as the doors to the elevator closed, I let out a shaky breath. In the ten years I was with Troy, I noticed other guys, of course. I wasn’t blind. But with Jared, the attraction almost made me dizzy.

  It wasn’t even just a physical thing, either. I mean, Jared was handsome in a way that was very opposite of the only man I had ever truly dated. Troy was muscular and large and his presence constantly made me feel petite. Jared was almost as tall as Troy, but his frame was a lot different. Troy was built like a mixture of a linebacker and a defensive tackle and Jared was more like the quarterback. Both men were good looking but in completely different aspects.

  The attraction went deeper, though. Conversing with Jared was always easy and I felt a desire to know more about him. The thought of having a fun, lighthearted conversation with him was thrilling and I really missed those ten minutes we would spend together in the morning.

  Angelo greeted me and I thanked him when he handed me my keys. I made it back home and went right back to my bedroom. It was almost one when I pulled off my pants and sweater to put my pajamas back on.

  Despite running on little sleep, I had another great day at work. I got a lot done from my desk and met Alyssa for lunch at a sandwich shop downtown. She hadn’t noticed my late night visit the night before and I didn’t tell her about it. I could have told her some of it without breaking client confidentiality but for some reason I just didn’t. I wasn’t ready to analyze the dynamic between the two of us but I also didn’t want to share our private moments.

  I had just sat back down at my desk after lunch when my phone vibrated to alert me to a text. I opened it and was surprised to see it was from Jared. A picture of Chris cuddled to his father’s chest as he slept was attached. The brown shirt I had been wearing was pinned between dad and son’s bodies and the text following the picture made me grin.

  Jared: I told you. You’re his comfort. He was out in minutes. You might have to leave more clothes here for my sanity’s sake.

  Me: Well, I’m glad it helped. Makes me feel like less of an idiot for leaving it.

  Jared: A man never finds it idiotic when a woman takes clothing off. True story.

  I chuckled and locked my phone without responding.

  Yeah, I had no ide
a what our dynamic was anymore but I liked it.

  –––

  I spent the first hour at work on Thursday trading calendars with the others before I left to do the home visits I had to do for the day. When the home visits were basic placement check-ins like the Harts, we did them solo. The ones where we were anticipating issues from or had seen issues before, we were required to do in duos for safety reasons. My small caseload had a mixture of both but the ones I did that day were easy.

  I did my first two of the day and was very satisfied with them both as I left. The second one I was able to announce to the couple that I was officially closing their file and they both hugged me tight. I slid in my seat behind the steering wheel and started the car before grabbing my phone. I hesitated for a moment before pressing Jared’s name to call him. He answered quickly and I could tell he was smiling.

  “Hey, Stephanie.”

  “Hey. I know I’m about thirty minutes early but I just finished my last appointment. Is it okay if I come over now?”

  His quiet chuckle filled my car though the speakers. “You don’t even need to ask. Come on over. You can park your car in the gated lot. My code is three-nine-three-one and you can take any spot you want. The doorman on duty today is Howie. I’ll let him know you’re coming and he’ll swipe you into the elevator.”

  “Three-nine-three-one,” I repeated quietly. “I’m on my way.”

  “See you in a minute.”

  We ended the call and I headed towards downtown. When I made it to the familiar building, I pulled in and punched the code into the box at the entrance to the covered parking lot. There were a lot of empty spots so I picked the first one and went in the side door that led to the lobby. The friendly doorman smiled when he saw me.

  “Ms. Gibson, I’m Howie Twill. It’s good to meet you. Mr. Hart says you’re a miracle worker.”

  I followed him to the elevator with a smile of my own. “Oh, I don’t know about that.”

  He gestured to the open doors and I thanked him before pressing the twenty-one on the display. I was nervous as it rose and had no idea why. I had to remind myself that I was doing my job. Even if I was attracted to Jared, I still needed to be professional.

  The elevator dinged before the doors opened and I stepped out into the hallway. I’d been in such a hurry the other night that I really hadn’t had a chance to look around.

  The halls were decorated with sleek, modern designs. The brown, plush carpet looked brand new and the walls were painted a deep red color. Watercolor paintings were adorning the walls and different plants that looked like a classier version of the Ficus filled the space between paintings. I went right to door A and knocked softly. It opened about thirty seconds later and Jared appeared, wearing a pair of jeans and some sports t-shirt. He smiled before stepping back and beckoning me in.

  “Hey.”

  I returned his smile and moved into his living room, which was completely baby-proofed even though Chris was nowhere near mobile. “Hey. Thanks for letting intrude a bit earlier than planned.”

  “No problem at all.” He gestured to the bag on my arm. “You can drop your stuff wherever.”

  I draped my jacket on the back of the couch, put my bag on the sofa table by the door, and kicked my heels off where a few other pairs of shoes already were. I reached into it and pulled out my iPad before turning back to Jared. He was watching me carefully from where he stood near the kitchen entryway.

  “Do you have another appointment after this?”

  I nodded and tucked the tablet under my arm. “Kind of. I scheduled your visit from eleven to noon and I have lunch at noon. My next appointment isn’t until one.”

  “Got it.” He used one of his hands to gesture towards the kitchen. “Do you have lunch plans? I was going to order some food in and I’d be happy to get something for you, too.” When I started shaking my head, he continued. “Please don’t say ‘You don’t have to do that’ because I want to.”

  That had been exactly what I was going to say. I held his gaze for a minute before nodding. “Okay. Thank you.”

  “Do you like Mexican food?”

  “I love it.” I shrugged my shoulders slightly. “Surely you realize by now that I’ll eat about anything.”

  With a chuckle, he stepped away to order lunch and I took a second to look around.

  The building he lived in was beautiful and his condo was amazing. With a corner balcony that you could enter from the living room, the views of the city were breathtaking. You could see the entirety of downtown with the mountains in the background. He also had a spectacular view of Chase Field, where the Arizona Diamondbacks played, and you could see the building where our professional basketball team played, too. Hell, I could almost see my office from his windows.

  I ripped my eyes away from the view and pulled up the Hart file on my tablet. I began marking off what I already knew about his place and looked up when I heard Chris crying. I peered into the kitchen and Jared’s eyes collided with mine as he spoke on the phone. He nodded in answer to my silent question and I grinned before walking down the hall towards the master bedroom.

  He was in the bassinet next to the bed and his cry was so relaxed compared to when I first found him in the box. He was in a pair of green and white sleeper pajamas and he held his little fists by his head, obviously having broken out of his swaddle. I scooped him up and cradled him in my arm carefully. His crying immediately began to settle down and I pressed my lips to his forehead.

  “Hey, handsome. Long time no see.”

  His cries stopped completely and he peered up at me with his dark blue eyes. I was amazed at all of the different changes he’d gone through in the almost-three weeks since he’d been born.

  “I told you Daddy’s house would be great, didn’t I?” I laughed softly when his little mouth contorted into a big yawn. “The lazy life looks good on you, Christopher.”

  “Did he seriously stop crying just because you picked him up?” Jared asked behind me and I turned to give him a smug smile.

  “Maybe.” I ran my eyes across Jared’s face and nodded in satisfaction. “You look better today.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “You mean less frantic and more human?”

  Somehow he had managed to describe himself from two days before perfectly. When I’d walked in and seen how exhausted, frantic, and disheveled he’d been, it had surprised me. I was used to seeing Jared Hart completely put together even when he wasn’t on the inside.

  “That’s exactly what I mean.”

  “I swear, Stephanie, that shirt works miracles.” He gestured to where it was draped at the end of the bassinet. “My son is pretty hooked on you.”

  I glanced down at Chris and sighed. “Well, the feeling is mutual. I’m pretty hooked on him.”

  After making a pit stop for a clean diaper, we both walked back out to the living room and I settled onto the couch with the baby and iPad in my lap. When Jared offered to relieve me of Chris, I shook my head.

  “I can make it work.” I paused and rushed on. “I mean, he’s your son so if you want him back…”

  “No, Steph. It’s fine. Spend time with him. I was just offering to help if you needed it.”

  I watched as he sat on the couch opposite where I was and I held his eyes for a moment before looking down at the tablet.

  “So, I’ve seen your home. You obviously have a very safe and nurturing environment for him. I need to ask you a bunch of questions and some are really ridiculous but stay with me, okay?”

  “Got it.” Jared nodded and proceeded to answer every single question seriously. Chris stared up at me the whole time and I was constantly prolonging questions so I could run my fingers down his cheek or kiss his face in some way. It took us about twenty minutes to get through my interrogation and I eventually dropped the iPad to the cushion between us.

  “Well, you’ve passed your first home visit.” I smiled at him. “Congratulations.”

>   Jared chuckled and gestured to Chris. “Does that mean I get to keep him?”

  “Unless I can figure out a way to sneak him out of here, yeah.”

  “You’re the only one I’d trust,” he replied quietly. “They still haven’t found Angela yet, huh?”

  I shook my head. “They don’t have a clue where she might be. I have court next week to officially terminate her parental rights now that the waiting period has passed. Since she’s facing criminal child endangerment charges related to the abandonment, she won’t ever be able to petition to have her rights reinstated.”

  Jared blew out a long breath and relief filled his face. “I had a dream last night that she came back and I had to share custody with her. I don’t think I could ever trust him with her.”

  “You don’t need to worry about that,” I reassured softly. “Whatever he knows about his mother in the future is your choice. Legally, she has no rights to him.” I hesitated for a moment. “Can I ask you a personal question?”

  “Yeah, of course.”

  “When you were dating her, did you notice any… issues? Mentally?”

  He shook his head and let his eyes close for a moment. “Nothing at all until we split. We ended it amicably because we both decided we wanted different things. After that, though, she started treating me like a villain. Sending me shitty texts, trashing me to her friends and on social media.” He reopened his eyes and focused them on me. “Honestly, Stephanie, I’m beyond pissed she never told me she was pregnant. Even if she had come to me four weeks ago, I would have been there.”

  “I don’t doubt that.”

  He offered me a small smile and we stared at each other in silence for a moment. The intercom beeped, causing us both to jump and breaking us out of the moment.

  Jared stood up to answer it. When Howie said that our food was there, Jared insisted on going down to get it. The door closed behind him and I turned my attention back to Chris. He was moving a bit more in my arms and trying to suck on his hand, my arm, and his pajamas. I went to the kitchen and found a clean bottle next to the formula. Jared walked in with carry-out bags as I was shaking the bottle to mix it.