Never Letting Go (Delphian Book 1)

by Christina Channelle

  I didn’t have the guts to watch him fall to his death.

  “I can’t.”

  My heart sat uncomfortably in my chest, and the tears decided to fall. “Why couldn’t you just do it, Liam?” I stepped forward and buried my face in his chest. “I do love you,” I said, and he tightened his hold on me. “Please know that.”

  “I do,” he mumbled against me. I felt his own tears coat my skin. “I love you, too. That’s why I can’t do it.”

  I looked up at his face, tears streaming down my chin. He saw the look of regret in my eyes and shook his head in confusion.

  “Soph…”

  “Do you remember the first time we met? We were five years old. That was when you lived right next door to me.”

  He nodded slightly. “You had just moved in.”

  “That’s right,” I said, encouraged. “I was sad that I had moved away from all my friends and I was lying on the grass in the backyard near the fence that we shared. Then all of a sudden I hear this little voice ask me what I’m doing.”

  A smile ghosted his lips. “You turned around and you were confused, not knowing where the voice came from.”

  “Over here, see?” Little fingers fluttered at the base of the fence. I walked over closer and sat down, noticing a hole in the fence that had a hand sticking out. The hand quickly retreated and was replaced by an inquisitive eye.

  “So, what are you doing?” he asked.

  “I was looking at the stars…”

  Before he could say anything else, I took the knife that Sabina had given me—which had been tucked inside my thigh high stockings—and shoved it straight into his chest. Liam’s eyes widened in shock and he took a step back, staring down at the blade protruding from his body.

  His eyes went to mine. “No…” he breathed painfully.

  “I’m sorry.” Giving him a final kiss, I took his soul away from his body before he fell over the balcony and dropped to the ground.

  I peered over the balcony, staring down at his damaged body.

  “It’s better this way,” I murmured, stepping back as I regarded the soul of my dead best friend beside me. He looked back at me, puzzled at what had just happened. I smiled, seeing some of the darkness disappearing in his eyes, yet trying my best not to show my pain and heartache.

  I just killed my best friend.

  “Soph…” he said softly. He looked down at his body lying on the ground levels down, then stared back at me, eyes frightened. “What did you do?”

  “I promise you, Liam,” I said, ignoring his questions. “It will be better this way. I’m giving you another chance. To right what’s wrong. You’ll be Grim, like me. I’ll take you to the in-between and make sure you become Grim. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

  He laid tormented eyes on me and I knew a piece of Liam had still not returned. Even though I was staring at my best friend, I felt like I was staring at a stranger.

  “I promise,” I said again.

  I sure hoped I was right.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  I FINALLY MADE it back to the apartment I shared with Ethan about an hour later.

  Closing the door behind me, I rested against it, sighing.

  “Rough night?”

  I smiled at the sound of Ethan’s voice and looked over at him standing by the couch.

  I gave him a hug, burying my face in his chest, trying to forget the entire day, wishing I had never woken up.

  He pulled back slightly. “You okay, Kitty Cat?”

  I nodded. “Yeah … just a long night. I’m glad it’s over.”

  That was an understatement. Bringing CJ to Hell and Liam to the in-between had wrecked me. Seeing Liam again was tough, and I did what I had to do. But I knew there would be repercussions.

  I just hoped Ethan would forgive me.

  I stepped away and turned the music up on my phone, playing some popular song I kept hearing everywhere. I shook the hem of my dress at him playfully. “Since we’re still dressed up and all…” I extended a hand. “May I have this dance?”

  He looked back at my hand, smiling, then walked over to me, pulling me close.

  “Stop stealing all my lines, Kitty Cat.”

  I wrapped my arms around his neck and breathed him in, the both us of rocking back and forth to the melancholy music surrounding us.

  “We did it,” I sighed against his chest, for the first time in a long time feeling … happy.

  We successfully did our reaps, the Liam I knew was back and no longer able to hurt any more girls, and I was wrapped up in the arms of my love.

  “Yes,” he said simply, kissing the side of my face, then my neck.

  “My love,” I sighed into his chest.

  “My heart,” he said back, holding me even closer as we danced.

  My soul.

  I turned just in time to see lightning light up the sky so brilliantly that for a brief moment, the darkness had turned to day. I smiled softly at what I saw before me, then turned to stare back at Ethan.

  “There’s no one I love more than you,” I said quietly into the darkness. “Remember that.”

  He didn’t say anything in return, just grasped my fingers with his, brought them closely to his face, and kissed the inside of my palm.

  My eyes fluttered shut and I basked in the sensation, tried to sear it to memory. We stayed like that … seemed like hours … but it was only minutes, happy just being with one another.

  I glanced up at him, still swaying to the melody of the song. “I have something to tell you.”

  He studied the worried look on my face and frowned. “What is it?”

  I opened my mouth to speak, but at that exact moment the song ended, the final note ringing in my ears. I noticed a change in the air and I swallowed. Something was wrong. I felt surrounded, like I couldn’t breathe. Like I was being suffocated. Closing my eyes, I tried breathing one final time.

  She had come for me.

  “Wha—?”

  Hearing Ethan’s exclamation, I opened my eyes, shocked when I stared at my hand against Ethan’s chest. It was faint, like surrounded by a stormy cloud.

  Disappearing.

  “Ethan?” I said, dread surging through my body. I grasped at his shirt but failed to hold on.

  Ethan looked rattled, his jaw clenching and unclenching as he swallowed repeatedly. He looked around the apartment helplessly, shaking his head all the while. His eyes stared straight into mine, wild with fear. “No,” he said. I could see the rage slowly building inside of him and I was scared.

  For Ethan.

  “No!” he said again, this time louder. He stared up at the ceiling. “Not her, we had a deal! Take me instead!”

  “Ethan,” I cried softly, my whole body feeling strange and out of sync, as if humming at its own frequency.

  He locked eyes with me again and I froze, unable to look away. “Sophia, no,” he said, a tear running down his cheek, his face inches away from mine, yet I was unable to feel his presence.

  “I’m sorry,” I managed to whisper.

  Then he was gone.

  I saw nothing, just pitch darkness. I walked around in circles, disoriented and confused.

  “Everything has consequences, Sophia dear.”

  My eyes widened. The voice had come from … within me. It was a female voice, eerie, and made my skin crawl.

  And the one from my dream when I had made that deadly deal.

  “No,” I said again faintly, trembling.

  “Yes,” the same voice whispered into my ear. I turned swiftly to see a woman standing in front of me, an evil smirk on her face. She dressed head to toe in blood red, intricate tattoos along her skin that seemed to beat as if each design had its own heartbeat.

  “Allow me to formally introduce myself.” She sauntered closer to me and grabbing me by the hand, yanked me forward. “The name’s Jinx. I’ve wanted to meet you ever since I got the scent of your soul. It’s really … sweet.”

  I couldn’t move away
from her grasp. She was strong, so strong, and her fiery eyes seemed to have hypnotized me.

  She gave me a knowing look. “You knew what would happen if you interfered with the human world, Sophia,” she stated in an almost reprimanding tone. “You killed a non-reaper and that’s a big no-no. You’ve officially been stripped of your Grim duties effective immediately, so our little deal just went down the drain. Say bye-bye to your lover boy, Ethan. Too bad he couldn’t join us, though. I’m going to love adding you to the collection. I think you’ll be my favorite pet.”

  As Jinx leaned forward, her eyes started to gleam and the only thing I saw was fire surrounding me as I looked into her eyes. I wanted to scream Ethan’s name but my voice was stuck in my throat.

  I knew things would never be the same.

  “Welcome to the dark, my sweet.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Ethan

  “WHY DOES OUR heart beat?”

  Ethan looked over at Sophia, who stared up at him with solemn green eyes.

  “Why do we still bleed?” she continued, looking down at the cut on her hand that she had accidentally given herself while prepping dinner.

  “I think it’s a reminder,” Ethan answered. “That our presence in the land of the living is as fragile as the human lives we take. That we, too, can pretty much cease to exist at any moment.”

  She looked forward, like she was viewing something only she could see. “How tragic.”

  Ethan stared down at his bloody knuckles as if hypnotized, the creases on his forehead deeper and deeper with each passing moment. It took him a moment to realize the hard banging he heard repeatedly wasn’t coming from inside his head, but the front door.

  Eyes narrowed, he placed his hands on his thighs and stood, his brain still not functioning enough to process what had just happened. Resting his hands against the door, he took a moment to breathe calmly while his mind was behaving in every way but calmly. Sophia was … gone.

  Damn you, Jinx.

  Giving his head a shake, he reached for the handle and opened the door. His eyes widened in surprise.

  “Hi, Briggs!”

  In her pink formal gown, Amy stepped into the apartment like she owned the place and spun around. She ignored the absolute destruction of the room, the overturned couches and holes punched in the walls. She looked over at him, grinning. “Or is it Ethan now?”

  “What?”

  “We don’t have time for small chitchat,” said another voice, and a girl Ethan didn’t know waltzed into the room like a woman on a mission. Dressed in a simple sweater and skirt with leather leggings, her all black attire gave her a commanding presence. She looked familiar and he realized it was the girl from the formal who had been staring at Sophia with haunting eyes.

  He looked from one girl to the other. “What the hell is going on?”

  Amy smiled and ran over to Ethan, hugging him tightly. She pecked him on the cheek. “I’ve missed you so much!”

  Ethan stood rigidly in Amy’s arms and he took a firm hold of her shoulders, slowly disengaging her from him. “What are you two doing here?”

  “We’re here to help.”

  “Help?” Ethan stared at the unknown girl who’d spoken. “And who are you?”

  She gave a tense smile, looking out of place. “Sorry. My name is Sabina. We’re here to help you with your … situation.”

  “My situation?”

  “We’re here to get Sophia back,” answered Amy.

  “And where is she exactly?” asked Ethan.

  “The Delphian,” a third voice said from the door.

  Ethan turned to the guy standing by the door, and it took everything in him to not shove this person out the window. Or wrap his bloodstained hands around his throat.

  The guy stepped further into the apartment and shut the door, while the four of them remained standing in the damaged living room.

  “Ethan…” the newcomer said. He was dressed in jeans, a jacket covering a dark t-shirt—complete opposite from everyone still dressed in his or her formal wear.

  Ethan’s eyes hardened, fists clenched at his side.

  “Liam…”

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  To Cheyanne, who has probably read this book a million times over, thank you! I hope you’ve enjoyed NLG in all of its delightful drafts.

  Thanks to Ocean’s Edge Editing for its editing services on Reap and Sow, and for Lola’s Blog Tours’ amazing help on NLG’s cover reveal.

  And finally, to my family who has continued to support me on my writing journey, a thousand hugs your way!

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Christina Channelle is the author of Young Adult and New Adult Fiction, her series including Four Letters and Blood Crave. She’s happily addicted to coffee, the colour green, and Netflix. She’s also partial to writing about angsty girls who may or may not have a potty mouth.

  Christina was born and raised in the Greater Toronto Area, graduating with both Bachelor of Arts and doctorate degrees. She is currently enrolled in a post-graduate television writing and producing program where she looks forward to being buried in scripts and producing awesome web series.

  For more information on upcoming books and other book-related fun, visit Christina at:

  www.ChristinaChannelle.com

  Or subscribe to her newsletter at:

  tinyletter.com/ChristinaChannelle

  Also by Christina Channelle

  The BLOOD CRAVE series

  A YA urban fantasy

  Told in the perspective of three young women (and each with their own supernatural gifts) their lives are on the line when they become pawns in a deadly game of chess. No one is safe, including their loved ones.

  Welcome to a world where fallen angels and vampires coexist.

  Read an excerpt of the first book!

  SNEAK PEEK

  Dahlia – Book 1

  I WAS FIVE when I knew something was different about me.

  My first memory.

  I had no recollection of who my parents were or what they even looked like. All I knew was that I was alone at the orphanage, disconnected from the outside world. I picture it even now, almost like an oil painting: the thick bristles of the paintbrush created the bright blue sky as it connected to the shockingly white snow. The snow blanketed everything around me, as if protecting me, the green forest displayed at every angle.

  The orphanage was out of place in such a nature-infused environment. A large, two-story building, its windows seemed to cover almost every surface. I remembered the brightness of the sun as it hit my sleepy face through one of those many windows. It would instantly warm my body, greeting me to yet another day.

  Vines covered old gray bricks as they coursed over the external surface of the orphanage. I had nightmares about those same vines making their way into my room as I slept. They’d appear ominously as their shadows pounded against the walls, taunting me as a storm brewed on outside. Venturing toward my bed, the vines would slither across my body, trapping me in place. One would wrap around my neck, squeezing tightly, as I struggled for air. Rendered frozen, the feeling of fear would take hold, bubbling up deep inside my chest. And as I felt the burning pain in my throat, a thought would flash through my mind of this moment being my last. It never was, though, as I would instantly wake up.

  I always did have a wild imagination.

  To chase away the terror, I would stand before my windowpane the morning after. Sighing in relief, my eyes would be drawn to the vast forest off in the distance. It surrounded the orphanage, like a gatekeeper, the leaves of the trees bristling in irritation. The wind blew right through those tall structures, whistling, as my ears picked up the all too familiar sound.

  I somehow found myself standing directly in front of that very forest. My memory was hazy on exactly how I got there but I recalled waking up, after one of my many dreams, to the feeling of immense hunger as my body stirred in discomfort.

  Then suddenly I was at the foot of the forest.<
br />
  I would not describe the sensation as simple hunger. I would almost describe it as a feeling of starvation, like there was some essential component my body was missing. Whatever it was, this need was so powerful I was weak in the knees with the pain; my belly contracted and released, contracted and released, continually. Food provided temporary relief for me, but there was always this presence in the corner of my mind as my brain searched for the one thing my body craved.

  I ignored that nagging voice in my head, the one whispering for the one thing I needed. It was something unfathomable yet inherent. I paid it no attention and just openly stared at the forest beckoning me. Taking shallow breaths, the cool air blew in and out between my cold, chapped lips.

  It was at that exact moment I realized the forest isolated me from everything and everyone outside of its confines—almost like a hungry bird circling its prey. Even young, my instincts picked up on that, immediately telling me something.

  Eyes were watching me.