Whiskey and Regret

by Danielle James

  “You might be ready but I want you to experience life without being married. You need that.”

  “I don’t disagree.” I studied his dark brown eyes. “You’re not trying to get rid of me, are you?” I locked onto him with an incredulous gaze. It made him tip his head back and let out a deep rumbling laugh.

  “Get rid of you? I don’t think that’s even possible. No. I’m not getting rid of you and I never said I was. I just want your dreams to have a space to live and breathe before we get married.”

  “I want that too,” I told him touching the side of his face. “I love you more than I think I’ve ever loved any pair of shoes or handbag. I love you more than I love Sunshine,” I said quietly. A flicker of shock crossed his eyes. My lips curved into a smile.

  “Wow. I feel like you just proposed to me after hearing that,” he joked. I shoved him a little then laughed.

  “Shut up.” I sucked my teeth. “I want to see where Sunshine takes me though. I could finally get a seat on the philharmonic. I could become a renowned harpist. I have no idea, but I want to experience it while I’m Xari Lucas. I want to stand on my own accomplishments first. Then I want to settle down with you and have all the babies.”

  Evander hooked his arm around my waist then took his free hand and poked the tip of his finger into my dimples. “I’m in full agreement. I think I want the same thing,” he told me. We moved up the steps and into what had quickly become our bedroom.

  “You want to follow your dreams?” I asked. He’d accepted the publishing deal from Bright House under a pseudonym, but I was worried he wouldn’t leave the senate once his term was up.

  “Isn’t that what we’ve talked about since the meeting with Nicki?”

  “It is but I didn’t think you were ready to decide on the senate yet.”

  “My decision was made the day I left the family mediator’s office. I’m over this politics shit. It’s not fulfilling.”

  “Oh?” I pulled off my shirt and walked into the closet in only a pair of shorts. “What’s fulfilling to you now, Senator? Because when I first got here you were all about morning workouts and nights at the office, signing bills and having meetings.” We’d both come so far it was amazing we were still the same people. Evander followed me into the closet with laughter on his lips.

  “That was lifetimes ago. Now that I’ve met this little light who burned her way into my world, I’ve changed the way I see things.” He pulled his hand along the rack of clothes I snuck into his generous walk-in closet then stopped on the white Armani dress. “Wear this one,” he said, plucking the hanger from the rack. “You’re already a flame.” His hands slid down my curves. “Your perfect body in this dress is going to be white-hot.” I already felt the heat creeping up the back of my neck and settling on the tops of my shoulders like a blanket.

  I sank my teeth into my bottom lip and looked up at Evander, my eyes were hooded with desire. I made no qualms about hiding it. “Wait until your parents are gone,” he smirked.

  “Or we could just fuck now and when my parents leave,” I offered.

  “Or you could just behave and follow directions.”

  “And when the fuck have I ever done that, Evander?” I pushed my lips to the side and stared at him.

  “When I make you. Now, get dressed and come see me. I have a present for you.” That was enough to kick my ass into high gear. I put on the Armani dress and picked out a pair of cobalt blue Louboutin heels. I looked in the full-length mirror and messed with my curls until they were tame and framing my face.

  When I walked back into the bedroom, Evander looked at me for a long while before saying anything. Then he finally opened his mouth. “If you’re a good girl, then you won’t have any panties on under that dress.” I watched him grip his growing cock through his gray slacks and my knees wobbled. In his other hand was a smallish black box with a white bow on top.

  I wanted to know what was in the box more than I wanted to be a smart ass and fight him like I normally did. So, I lifted my dress and showed him that I indeed wasn’t wearing any panties. We both liked it better that way.

  Evander motioned for me to come to him with his pointer finger and I was there in an instant. His hand smoothed over my ass while he squeezed his dick through his pants. Why was he making me wait until my parents left? I didn’t want to. I wanted my dick when I wanted it. I hated being told to wait.

  “Stop pouting. You’ll get dick later. If you’re a good girl for me. Now, get your pretty ass over my knee.”

  “Over your knee? Evander, is this going to wrinkle my dress?”

  “Maybe. You’ll still be fine as fuck though so bend the hell over before I make you.” His voice got all growly and my insides turned to mush. He sat the black box on the bed and tugged me down over his knee by my wrist. A small yelp escaped me but I stayed put. Excitement and anticipation thrummed through my body. “I got you something, Xari.

  “I see,” I said, wrestling with the steel-winged butterflies in my stomach. He opened the box and nestled inside a white satin cushion was a stainless-steel butt plug and a bottle of lube. “Oh my god, Evander!” I laughed loudly. My cheeks flushed from the thought of him putting that gleaming steel plug inside of me.

  “I want you to keep this in while we have dinner.”

  “With my parents!” I blinked.

  “Yes. You’re going to do it too because you’re behaving tonight, right?” I bit my bottom lip and nodded quietly. A part of me wanted to balk at the suggestion but the other part of me was on fire with the thought of having a nasty secret between us all evening. I went with the other half of myself.

  “Let me get this pussy wet first.” He landed a heavy slap to my ass and everything between my legs tingled. The slaps came faster and heavier until tears pricked my eyes and whimpers slid out of my mouth. My skin was hot everywhere his hand landed. Raised welts on my ass and the backs of my thighs hummed with heat. Every time he rubbed my flesh to soothe the pain, I moaned involuntarily. My body was so greedy when it came to him.

  “Let’s see how wet you got for me.” He spread me open and slipped one finger inside. “Fuck, Xari.” He licked his finger clean then dipped two fingers inside, stretching my pussy and making me hungry for his cock. I knew I wouldn’t get it though. Not until later.

  He slid my arousal back to my tight virgin asshole and teased me there until he worked a fingertip inside. A rush of air escaped me, and he chuckled. “Shh, baby. I’ll make sure you’re relaxed. Stand up.” His words were innocuous but his tone and the look in his eyes warned of a ravenous predator.

  He pushed me over the side of the bed so that my ass was in the air then he lowered to his knees behind me and plunged his warm tongue in my pussy, growling, licking, and fucking me with his tongue until an orgasm leaked from me.

  “Good girl. You know I love it when you wet my tongue up.” He lapped up every drop of me before moving to my asshole. He pressed his big hands against my cheeks and squeezed then he dipped his tongue inside, tasting me where nobody had gone before. Well…I had my ass eaten plenty of times but never like this. Never when I was anticipating something else going in there. I’d always stopped men from fucking me in the ass because I didn’t trust anyone to be gentle enough to make me like it.

  I trusted Evander though.

  He ate my ass like there was no dinner on the table. Like this would be the only thing he ate for days. He bit my cheeks while he rubbed the soreness away. His long fingers inched closer to my puckered hole and I tensed in anticipation of him entering.

  “You have to relax, Xari.” I nodded, knowing he was right, but still holding on to involuntary apprehension. When I unclenched, Evander’s finger slipped in.

  It was so big I wondered if I’d ever be able to handle anything bigger. “Such a good girl. Look at how that ass is opening for me.” He grabbed the lube and I gripped the sheets in my fists. I felt him easing another finger in and I moaned. I had no idea where the sound came from but god it fe
lt good to let it out.

  I couldn’t decide if I liked the first finger when it went inside, but my body clearly liked the second finger. Wetness dripped from me while he slipped in and out of my lubed asshole. With his other hand, he reached around and teased my clit.

  “Oh god,” I said, feeling an orgasm readying at my core. When Evander was done fucking my ass with two fingers, he pulled them out and I pouted. I didn’t get a chance to pout for too long because he replaced his fingers with his tongue again.

  I was in heaven.

  I surrendered my body to him, and he made art of it. My moans were symphonies in the air and my body was his keyboard. He touched me like I was every word on every blank page he’d stared at.

  I felt Evander’s tongue withdraw and he replaced it with something cold and hard. It jolted my senses and I tensed, halting the steel from entering any further.

  Downstairs, the doorbell rang, and I gasped. “The sooner you relax, the sooner you can open the door for Mommy and Daddy,” he teased.

  “Evander, I have to open the door!”

  “Then relax this pretty ass and let me put the plug in.” How the fuck was I supposed to relax knowing my mother and father were on the other side of the door downstairs?

  Evander’s fingers inched inside my ass again and I groaned at the tingling, prickling pleasure flooding my senses. “Ah, there she is. My nasty little slut. Open up.” He tapped my ass and I found safety and comfort in him again. My muscles relaxed and he slid the slippery plug inside of me little by little.

  “All done,” he said, patting my ass.

  “Really?” I asked adjusting to the feeling of something foreign inside of me while I stood up. My entire body pulsed with my heartbeat. I straightened my dress and clenched my muscles around the butt plug.

  “You look perfect.” He licked his lips and stood. “And the best part is while I’m eating dinner, I can still taste you on my tongue.” He leaned down and slipped his tongue in my mouth, licking and sucking. “Now go answer the door.”

  He knew he was fine as hell. He knew I wanted to fuck him where he stood too. Yet he sent me to open the door. I guess I couldn’t leave them standing on the porch forever.

  I rushed down the steps constantly reminded of the weight sitting inside of me. When I opened the door, Mom, Dad and Navy stood on the other side. I welcomed them with hugs and kisses on the cheek then I took the dish Mom had into the kitchen.

  “This house is beautiful,” she said, looking around getting ideas for her and Dad’s house, no doubt.

  “Are you sure your boss is okay with you using his house to host a dinner for us and your boyfriend, Xari?” Dad grumbled.

  “I’m sure,” I laughed a little, shooting a look at my sister. She was pretty in a peach dress with a much more adventurous neckline than I was used to from her. I wondered if she was going to see Apollo after she left dinner.

  “I didn’t say anything to them,” Navy said, reaching for the bottle of wine on the island.

  “Say anything to us about what?” Mom quizzed, folding her arms. I took the top off the dish and made an indulgent noise when I saw the homemade banana pudding.

  “Oh my god, Mom!” I leaned over and sniffed the pudding with my eyes closed.

  “I know. You haven’t had it in so long, I thought since we were meeting the boyfriend I might as well break out the big guns.” My mother’s banana pudding was to die for. I never ate anyone else’s because it would be an insult to the homemade cookie custardy, goodness she baked in her oven.

  “So it’s okay if I just hide this for myself, right?” I beamed with a smile.

  “Girl, don’t even try it. Now, where is this boyfriend? Or do you have to wait for Senator Freeman to leave?”

  “No need to wait for me to leave,” Evander’s voice rounded the corner and he was all smiles. Six-foot-three. Two hundred and thirty pounds of chiseled fucking sex.

  I’m sure that’s not what my parents saw when they looked at him but that’s what the fuck I saw.

  “Senator Freeman, nice to meet you, man. I’ve heard so much about you from Xari and Navy. Thank you for being such a kind boss to my girls.” Dad shook Evander’s hand and they shared a polite smile.

  “Yes, we appreciate you giving Xari a chance. I know she didn’t have any experience as a nanny, but you took a chance on her and we are so grateful.”

  “God, you guys make me sound like the fuck up of the family,” I griped, pouring glasses of wine for everyone.

  “Xari, watch your mouth, girl,” Mom fussed, shooting a disapproving look my way. I forgot just that quick that they had no idea Evander was my man and my boss. They thought I was letting the f-bomb fly in a work setting.

  “It’s true though,” I shrugged.

  “You’re not the fuck up of the family, Xari. Cut that out,” Navy added.

  “Whatever,” I muttered,

  “I wasn’t sure about hiring her as my daughter’s nanny at first, but she proved herself to be invaluable. She took to it like a fish to water.” Evander’s arm slid around my lower back in that possessive way I loved so much, and my father’s eyes dropped to his hand on my hip. “Now she’s making schedules just as efficiently as Navy. You have amazing daughters, Mr. and Mrs. Lucas.”

  “Thank you,” Dad said, uncertainty thinning his tone. Mom looked over her shoulder at Navy who was seated at the island sipping her glass of wine, unbothered.

  “So, you guys want to move into the dining room? I have the table already set. The food is on warmers, so nothing is cold.” Evander and I walked in hand in hand and I felt my father’s laser beam eyes on us the entire time. Mom was busy trying to piece the puzzle together even though it was right in her face.

  “So, when are we meeting this serious boyfriend of yours?” Dad asked. His arms were folded across his chest, blocking any and all bullshit.

  Evander and I shared a glance as he pulled out my chair and helped me slide up to the table. Navy snorted into her wine glass and made a humming noise with her lips pressed together. She was barely holding her laughter in.

  “Ah…” Evander chuckled and took his seat next to me. “Nice to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Lucas. I’m Evander Freeman and I’m madly in love with your daughter.”

  You could have heard a fucking pin drop on the carpet.

  The room stretched then filled itself to the ceiling with silence and quiet glances. My face flushed and I looked at Evander before looking at my parents trying to gauge their reactions.

  Navy let out another snicker and tipped her wine glass up. “I’m so glad I decided to tag along for this,” she sighed.

  “Jesus fucking Christ,” Dad said, rubbing his face. “You?” He pointed at Evander from across the table. I busied myself with lifting the lids off the warming platters hoping the aroma of garlic and parmesan would grab their attention.

  “Yes sir,” Evander said. He was so at ease like he’d done this shit a million times. He was a politician though and they were used to wading through shit storms. “I know this is a little awkward and clunky right now but trust me, I’m not here to play with Xari’s heart. We take our relationship seriously.” He lifted our connected hands then kissed my knuckles. We were united.

  I watched the stiff way my father sat up taller in his chair and kept my eye on that twitching vein running up the side of his head and disappearing into a silver and black crop of close-cut hair.

  “How old are you, Senator?” Dad said, clasping his hands on the tabletop.

  “I’m forty.”

  “You know how old my daughter is? She’s not even twenty-one yet.”

  “Precisely why I don’t have a glass of wine…even though I need one,” I muttered.

  “I’m aware of how old Xari is. Our age difference isn’t an issue as long as she’s an adult. Not a teenaged adult but an actual twenty-year-old.” He was being polite but I could tell he already had my dad pegged as overprotective, so he made sure to stand his ground. I, on the other hand, was
going to dissolve into the ground.

  “She is a grown woman, babe,” Mom chimed in. She looked at me for a few beats then looked at Evander then Navy. “You knew, didn’t you?” She asked my sister.

  “By knew do you mean Xari told me all the scandalous details? No. She was tight-lipped, which was what made me think she was serious. Y’all know how Xari is.”

  “Exactly. That’s why I don’t understand this relationship. Xari, are you serious about this?” Dad asked, unconvinced.

  “About Evander?” I frowned. “Of course. I wouldn’t have gone through all this trouble if I wasn’t serious about him.” I felt the sting of my father’s words but braved them head-on.

  “I’m all for you being happy, Xari but…” Dad’s words fell off a cliff.

  “I’m in love,” I told them both. Under the table, Evander squeezed my thigh and my body clenched around something warm and unyielding.

  The butt plug.

  My cheeks heated at the thought.

  “In love?” Dad stroked his chin then eyed my mother. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard her say that before.”

  “She’s never been in love,” Mom said.

  “If there’s one thing Xari is…it’s honest. She wouldn’t claim to be in love if she wasn’t,” Navy told them. She was right about that. I was a lot of things, but a liar wasn’t one of them.

  “It’s so insane to see my baby girl in love. I can see it all over you too, Xari. You can’t hide love if it’s that good.”

  “Sure as hell can’t,” I said, squirming in my seat. The plug nestled deeper inside of me and I tried not to let the desire and hunger simmering inside show on my face.

  “You didn’t hire her just because she’s beautiful…did you?” Dad asked Evander who chuckled hard and deep at the thought.

  “No. Being beautiful doesn’t cut it for me when I’m interviewing. I thought Xari was a little brat when she first started her probationary period.”

  “Wow, thanks for that, Evander,” I gave him a tight-lipped smile and he rubbed my leg under the table. Dad let out a laugh and nodded in agreement.