Whiskey and Regret

by Danielle James

  “Yeah, I can believe it.” His laughter seemed to ease the tension. I felt the storm clouds rolling away as dinner went on. There were less awkward silences and more talking, laughing, and clanking of dishes and silverware.

  “Oh, Evander, my mom made her famous banana pudding for dessert. Come on, let me show you.” I grabbed the plates from the table when I stood and my parents looked at me like I was an alien.

  “You…clean up now?” Mom stammered.

  “Yeah. It’s a habit. I have a twelve-year-old constantly attached to me. She’s a natural mess generator. If I don’t want the entire house looking like a tornado blew through, I have to clean.” Evander took the stack of plates from my hands and we carried them into the kitchen.

  “Look,” I said pulling the top off the banana pudding dish. His eyes widened and he leaned over to sniff. “All homemade. She’s a beast,” I grinned.

  “Reminds me of another talented cook.” He sat the plates in the deep sink then pulled me against him. His hands slid down my back until he cupped my ass, sending jolts up and down my spine. “You know Frankie asked about training to become a chef? I mean she mentioned it in passing but still…I know it’s because of you.” He kissed my lips. “Because nobody can be around you and not feel the pull to follow their dreams.” He kissed my neck and my knees turned to cream puffs unable to support my weight. I was steeped in need and Evander, as usual, was stroking the right strings to make my body hum.

  I locked my fingers around the back of his neck, standing on my toes and tipping my head back to grant him full access to my throat.

  “O…kay. Came in here trying to escape my parents being all over each other and come in here to this shit. Great.” Navy sat her empty wine glass down while Evander and I pulled away from each other.

  “Sorry, sissy.” I cleared my throat and grabbed the banana pudding.

  “I’ll get the plates,” Evander flashed Navy a smile then moved to the other side of the kitchen.

  “You know, Evander, you should have invited Apollo so Navy wouldn’t feel so left out. I have you, Mom and Dad have each other, and Navy could’ve had Apollo.” I grinned at her and she flipped me off.

  “That’s a good idea. Next time we have dinner, I’ll make sure he’s here.”

  “Both of you make me sick.” She swayed out of the kitchen and I followed her, laughing. I wished she’d hurry up and admit she likes Apollo. Jeez. The way those two looked at each other was so adorable.

  While we all sat around the table eating dessert, Evander made sure to groan and rub his muscle flanked stomach to let Mom know how much he enjoyed the pudding. She smiled at him and he said, “It’s delicious, Mrs. Lucas.”

  “Thank you. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Not everyone likes banana pudding but they usually like it when I make it.”

  “I’m sure I’ll love everything you make.” He looked at me and tucked his bottom lip between his teeth.

  That one look torched me.

  Do. Not. Cum. At. The. Dinner. Table.

  I sucked in a staggered breath and smiled. “Okay, I’ll hold you to it. I’ll make you something and bring it to you. I’m not telling you what it’s going to be though.”

  “Like I said, Mrs. Lucas…I’ll eat whatever you make.” His hand slipped under the hem of my dress and between my thighs while he maintained his angelic smile and double-edged conversation with my mother. “I’ll be sure to lick the plate clean.” His fingers grazed my pussy lips and I took a long gulp of water from my glass.

  I was going to fuck his brains out later. That was a promise.

  …

  Standing at my parent’s car after dinner, dessert, and good conversation, I hugged both my mother and father. Dad studied me then touched my chin. “I’m proud of you, Xari. You seem to finally get it.”

  “Get what, Daddy?” I quizzed. He shared a meaningful look with Mom.

  “You get that your life is yours to live. We can’t live it for you. We can’t bail you out and we can’t make decisions for you.”

  “Our little girl is growing up very nicely, don’t you think?” Mom pinched my cheek a little then leaned in to kiss my forehead.

  “Very nicely. I might not like the fact that your boyfriend is almost as old as me but you two seem to care about each other. I like seeing you happy, Xari. If Evander makes you happy, then I wish you two nothing but the best.” Daddy hugged me once more before getting in the car.

  Mom looked over her shoulder at him in the driver’s seat then whispered in my ear, “That man in there is fine, Xari. I mean fiiiine. Don’t get knocked up until you’re done doing everything you want to do with your life.”

  “Mom!” I laughed loudly.

  “What? As fine as he is you don’t think I know grandbabies are coming next? Girl, I started planning wedding colors the minute he said he was your man. Like I said, just take your time. Come into your own first then feel free to get your husband.” She winked at me and I wrapped my arms around her.

  “Thank you, Mommy.”

  “Thank you?” She chuckled, confused.

  “For cutting me off and making me stand on my own two feet. If you and Daddy hadn’t stood strong and insisted I take care of myself like I promised, I don’t know where I’d be. Probably still spoiled and stupid.”

  “You weren’t spoiled and stupid, Xari. Maybe Spoiled and young. I know I did the spoiling though, so I had to correct it. You’re doing a fine job, sweetie. Keep it up.” She wiggled her fingers at me then got in the car with Dad.

  “I heard you call that man fine,” he fussed before starting the engine.

  “I’m grown,” was her only retort. I shook my head as they pulled off. Next, I said my goodbyes to Navy and told her to go find out where Apollo lived so she could unplug him from his charging port and give him some pussy. She didn’t like that so she ignored me and got in the car. Hey, it made me laugh.

  “That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Evander asked when I walked into the house.

  “It wasn’t. After the initial awkwardness, everything smoothed out. I don’t’ think my father is ever going to be okay with the age difference though.”

  “That’s okay. I can’t say I’d be too happy if Frankie brought home someone my age. I get it. Luckily, this is our relationship.” He grabbed my wrist and pulled me against his hard body. He smelled good. Like cologne and soap. I lifted up on my tiptoes and licked the side of his neck.

  “Mmm,” I sighed at the way he tasted on my tongue.

  “Did you lick me?” He chuckled, sliding his hand inside my dress. He found my breast and cupped it before pinching my nipple and rolling it between his strong fingers.

  “You seemed to like it.”

  “I did. I love when you lick me,” he smiled. Before I knew it, Evander tossed me over his shoulder and carried me up the steps to our room. He set me on my feet and watched me like I was art.

  “You are so fucking beautiful. I wonder sometimes how the hell I got so lucky.” He untied the tie at my waist and licked his full lips at my body on display for him. Only for him. He was the only man I’d ever allowed to see me for who I was.

  He saw all of me even when I didn’t want him to. Even when I thought I did a good job at hiding who I really was and showing him the same thing I showed the rest of the world, he saw through it and he loved me in spite of it.

  “Come here, Xari.” He stood in front of me, unzipping his pants. My teeth seemed to clench down harder knowing he was about to be naked. I’d played the greatest classics ever known and still never experienced art as beautiful as Evander fully naked.

  I soaked in the rungs of golden abs leading to narrow, hips, and his thick, long dick that seemed to point straight at me. I thought I would tip over when he gripped that fucking monster and took one sure step toward me.

  “Let me take that butt plug out. Let’s see if you can fit my cock in there instead.”

  I bent at the waist, pushing my ass toward him and he groaned as I blossomed like
a flower for him. “Look at that,” he marveled, rubbing my ass in slow circles. “I’m going to pull it out now, don’t tense up.” His words were firm as he grabbed hold of the plug. He gave it two tugs and it eased out slowly. I already missed how full it made me feel.

  I didn’t miss it for long because Evander was behind me easing something much bigger inside. He was so hard and warm pressed against my puckered hole.

  “Oh…” I let out a low, soft groan as I stretched for him.

  “Little girl, little girl…let me in,” he grumbled inching deeper. I sucked in a breath and held it in my lungs until they started to burn. “You gotta breathe, baby. I’m not going to hurt you but I promise to make this dick fit in your tight little ass.”

  “Fuck, does your dick have to be so big?” I whined into the mattress.

  “You don’t usually complain,” he said, sliding in a couple more inches. “I know how to solve that shit.” His hand found my clit and my body jolted from the intense sensation buzzing through my bones. “Uh-huh. Give me that slippery orgasm, Xari.” He squeezed more lube and it slipped down the crack of my ass and right against my hole. His fingers continued working my sensitive nub while I squirmed and moaned, ready to explode with an orgasm.

  Then it happened. I came so fucking hard I went blind for a minute. Evander eased inside my ass, using the momentum from the way I came for him. I howled at the pressure and the feeling of being nearly split in two.

  Almost as sudden as the intensity came, it faded and gave way to warmth and pleasure. Evander made sure to stay put to let me adjust to his thick dick. Then, like he knew when my body was ready, he began stroking me slowly, thrusting his hips and dipping deeper into me.

  I had no idea anal would swing wildly between phenomenal and too much. It didn’t hurt because he was gentle but the amazing feelings consuming my body were so bold and in my face. I squeezed my eyes shut and pushed back against Evander’s thrusts. That shit felt so good.

  “Fuck me back, baby,” he instructed, slapping my ass. And I did. I fucked him back like a goddamn porn star once I realized I liked the way he fucked my ass. “Shit, Xari. You’re so tight.” His fingertips dug into my hips as he pounded my sore ass.

  Noises I’d never made before were flying out of my mouth. I couldn’t handle any more pleasure. I couldn’t take the pressure and the throbbing and thrusting. It was going to drown me. Eat me alive.

  “You’re going to ruin me,” I sobbed as my body tensed with an impending climax. Even my damn fingernails throbbed with the need to release.

  “Good. Let’s fall apart together, Xari. Come for me.” He slid his thumb in my soaking wet pussy then his fingers found my clit. It took approximately one and a half strokes to my bundle of nerves before I exploded.

  “Fuck!” Evander and I both shouted. My heart threatened to leap from my chest it was racing so hard and fast. Evander eased out of me and flopped over on the bed while I turned to dandelion fluff and floated all around the room or at least that’s what it felt like happened.

  “So…” I said with a hoarse voice. “After I conquer the world playing the harp and all…”

  “Uh-huh,” he chuckled, kissing my dewy forehead.

  “I’m giving you babies.”

  “How many?” He asked, still amused.

  “I don’t know. A lot? I’ll be like the Costco of baby-making for you.”

  “So I can get like a tub full of babies? Cool.” He poked my side and I laughed. It was a deep and cathartic laugh that I didn’t know I needed. Evander was always good for making me happy when I didn’t know I needed it though.

  That was him. He showed me lessons I didn’t know I needed to learn, and he did it with such ease. I couldn’t love him more. It was impossible. If I tried, I’d pop.

  “Are these babies coming before or after I make you Mrs. Freeman? Because that’s happening.”

  “I don’t care. I’m with you forever so if the babies come before marriage or after, it doesn’t matter.”

  Forever? Wow.

  I was head over heels for him. I used to never want to be with anyone forever. It was terrifying to think of but that was before Evander. That was before I knew what peace and growth looked like. After he showed me what love could be, forever didn’t seem like long enough.

  I wanted ten forevers with him.

  Only him.

  Always him.

  Epilogue

  Two years later…

  “Mrs. Freeman, time to wake up.” I motioned for Frankie to go around to the other side of the couch and wake Xari up too.

  We were trying to wait for midnight before we sprang the good news on her. She’d been so tired lately that she fell asleep before the show we were watching was over.

  “Xari,” Frankie sang. “Wake up.”

  “Xari hid her face behind her hands, blinding me with the ten-carat wedding ring on her finger. I knew she wouldn’t mind if I went with a bold choice for her ring. There was symbolism behind it though. I’d never give my wife an empty and meaningless ring.

  She told me before I proposed that one forever wasn’t enough with me. She wanted ten. I made sure her ring reflected that. Diamonds were forever and I gave her ten carats. Ten forevers.

  It was tough winning Mr. Lucas over but after a long fishing trip, we hashed everything out and I had his blessing. He finally warmed up to me and ever since, he’d been an amazing stand-in father since mine disowned me when I left the senate. I still kept in touch with my mother but things were done between me and my father.

  “I’ll catch up on the rest of the episodes later. Just let me sleep,” Xari whined, still covering her face.

  “Nah, we gotta get you up. We have somewhere to go,” I said, tugging on her hand.

  “Somewhere to go? Excuse me?” She cracked open one eye and still managed to glare at me. “It’s almost midnight. The only place I want to go is to bed.”

  “At eleven? Wow, you’re getting old,” Frankie snorted.

  “Whatever, little girl,” Xari laughed. “Where do we have to go?”

  “The movies, then IHOP,” I told her. She frowned a little and sat up straighter, tossing the blanket off.

  “Are we celebrating something?”

  “Duh,” Frankie laughed.

  “Anyone wanna tell me what we’re celebrating?” She was on her feet by then.

  “You,” I said simply, taking her hand in mine. Our wedding rings clinked together and she looked down at our hands. I loved how she still smiled when she saw our hands pressed together or our fingers linked. I can’t lie…I did the same thing.

  “Me?”

  “Are you a parrot?” I tapped the tip of her nose and she rolled her eyes. “We have something to tell you, Xari,” I said.

  “Okay, I’m listening.”

  “You got something in the mail and you also got a voicemail on the house phone that I may have listened to before you.”

  “Evander what the hell is going on?” She asked, punching my arm.

  “Please tell her, Dad. It’s killing me and I already know.” Frankie clasped her hands together under her chin and shifted from one foot to the other.

  “Okay, okay,” I sighed. “Xari, you got the spot for principal harpist with the National Philharmonic.” She’d auditioned three weeks ago when the spot opened, and they notified her via letter and phone call today. I happened to intercept both the letter and the phone call.

  The high-pitched squeal that exploded from her mouth let me know she was happy with the news. She hopped up and down and then right into my arms where I wanted her. I spun her around in a full circle then sat her on her feet.

  “Evander please tell me this isn’t a joke.” Her words were a rush of excitement.

  “Nope. Not a joke.” I motioned to Frankie and she pulled the letter from her hoodie pocket and handed it to Xari.

  Another scream and a few colorful words.

  “Let’s fucking celebrate!” She pumped her fist in the air and did a
cute-as-fuck little dance around the living room. “I can’t believe you guys hid this from me all damn day! I’m so getting you back for this.”

  “And how would you do that?” I laughed.

  “I have my ways, Evander Freeman.” She leveled me with a glare that I brushed off playfully.

  “You wanna pregame? Champagne before we go to the movies?” I asked, taking her by the hand into the kitchen.

  “Of course.” She pulled the flutes down and I grabbed a chilled bottle to pop open.

  “I’ll give you a taste Frankie,” Xari laughed. “I see you pouting. Just please don’t tell your crazy mother.”

  Crazy was a gross understatement. When Alexis found out I was marrying Xari and she’d have to share the last name Freeman, she threw a tantrum. She flattened my tires and wrote NANNY FUCKER on the side of my car. Not such a smart move on her part since she got fined for vandalism. She even tried unsuccessfully to throw herself at me when she picked up Frankie and Xari was out of town at an event.

  “Yeah, I know better than that now,” Frankie said.

  Xari poured two flutes of champagne and nodded her head at Frankie to have a sip. I allowed a taste or two for the occasion.

  “Okay, I’d like to make a toast.”

  “Xari, you can’t toast yourself,” Frankie laughed.

  “Hush. Now, like I said, I’d like to make a toast to you two.”

  “Us?” I frowned.

  “Yup. Because you two think you’re so smart tricking me and shocking the hell out of me,” she said.

  “That’s not a reason to toast, baby. That just means we’re better than you at surprises,” I said, holding my glass up.

  “That’s what you think but…” She pulled out her phone and held it toward us like she was recording. Was she recording? I leaned in a little and yup…she was definitely recording. “I can’t wait to see the look on your faces when I tell you that I’m pregnant.”

  My brain turned into useless mush.

  Pregnant?

  My wife was pregnant?

  “What?!” Frankie exploded with squeals and squeaks I didn’t even know she could make. I also didn’t know she could jump that high.