‘What happened?’ I got up.
Ignoring my question, he walked over to me and pushed me back down.
‘Daniel. What happened?’
He turned away avoiding my gaze.
‘Daniel.’
‘It’s nothing.’ He finally looked at me taking my hand into his. Slowly, his eyes trailed up and down the flesh wounds dotting my arms. We had both gone through too much.
‘Did he do this to you?’ Tears welled up.
When he didn’t reply, I turned to face him.
‘What happened?’
A few moments of silence passed between us before he cleared his throat and spoke.
‘He was hurting you… last night, I couldn’t just stand by….’
I dropped my gaze. ‘I will live through this. He needs me. But he’ll kill you. You know that.’
Shaking his head, he looked at me, his eyes brimmed with tears.
‘All these months, I tried to stop him, I did, I really tried, Ace, you have to believe me.’
‘Hey.’ I took his hand and squeezed it. ‘I know you did.’
‘It’s not good enough.’
‘Please, don’t do this.’ I smiled. ‘Don’t argue with me. I’m a big girl. I got this.’
He didn’t believe a word I said.
I gently punched him in the shoulder.
‘Seriously, they’re just physical wounds, they’ll heal, and my mind will learn to let go, my heart will be okay as soon as we’re out.’
His eyes brightened and then he nodded.
‘I promise. I’ll be alright, just don’t get yourself killed because of me.’
‘Fine.’ He shook his head, hating every word I was saying. Thankfully, he changed the topic. ‘How are you doing today?’
I shrugged. How was I doing? Alright considering that the memories kept coming back in waves, hitting me every morning, like I was watching some sick, twisted family movie and I was the star.
Master Jackass didn’t even bother with pleasantries anymore. He hit me and beat me every other night when I resisted and then he’d break down and beg me to forgive him. But I was still here. I was surviving somehow. Just like I said. Physical wounds would heal and, in time, I would slowly learn to let go.
I smiled, as honestly as I could and turned to him, pulling up my sleeve.
‘I’m fine, kid.’
He took my arm and tied the tourniquet above my elbow.
‘Don’t stop at the half dose.’
His eyes found mine. ‘Ace….’
I had no energy to fight him. ‘The memories are starting to come back.’
He knew they would. I knew they would. But not this soon.
He bowed his head. ‘I promise you this will be over soon.’
Flinching slightly as the needle pierced my skin, I nodded as it pushed the liquid into my veins, spreading, infecting and healing every inch of my soul.
He squeezed my hand before gently placing it in my lap.
‘It’s late, we should head down for dinner.’
Nodding, I followed him to the door and then stopped.
‘What’s wrong?’
‘I have to do something.’
He looked over at me when I walked back to the bed and pulled out Illarion’s letter.
‘What are you doing?’
Turning it over in my hand, I looked at it for a quick moment before I slowly tore it.
Daniel dropped his gaze when I’d shredded it, beyond recognition.
‘I don’t need to know what it says. I’m getting out of here, we both are.’
Daniel gently squeezed my shoulder and smiled. ‘We are.’
***
Together we sat, waiting for his father. When he finally arrived, the usual proceedings took place. He ordered Daniel to inject me and then he watched while I ate, while my nose bled, while I struggled to keep anything down, then finally, he led me to his office.
‘I’ll be with you shortly,’ he muttered, leaving me alone.
Waiting, I dropped heavily into the chair.
My mind wandered all over the place, fragmented memories pieced themselves together and then drifted apart like my own mind couldn’t muster the strength it took to hold on to them.
A quick look at the clock told me more than an hour had passed since he’d left me.
Footsteps outside alerted me to his presence, as the door opened, I swallowed hard. He was alone. That was a bad sign.
‘You don’t look too well, Acacia,’ he said, lifting my chin up with his bony finger.
His eyes found mine and a breathless second later, before I could even register what was happening, he’d yanked my head back and stabbed a syringe into my neck.
My heart rate skyrocketed and no matter how much I struggled and fought, my arms kept hitting nothing but air.
A breath caught in my throat as my eyes followed his hand, another dose, another full dose of the Serum. No. No this couldn’t be happening.
‘Now,’ he smiled, kneeling next to me. ‘Tell me what my son has been doing, aside from fucking you.’
A scream was building in my lungs. No, no, no.
‘Hmm?’
The words were on the tip of my tongue, burning, begging to be released. I bit down until I drew blood. Squeezing my eyes shut, I fought the Serum. I fought its hold on me. I had to fight. Whatever happened next, I couldn’t give in.
He wrapped his hand around my throat, dragged me to my feet, and pushed me backwards, pinning me to the wall.
‘Answer the question.’
‘Fuck you,’ I hissed, opening my eyes.
He grinned, but not the kind of grin he’d usually have given me. No. this was new, this was a whole lot of bad, and a whole lot of unknown.
‘I suspect you only have a few more seconds of lucidity left. Make them count.’
His hand slipped under my dress and I tried pushing against him, praying that I had some strength left, and when he tried to pull at the hem of my underwear, I managed to lift my knee and shove him back.
‘Fuck you.’
‘Only a whore would have such an eloquent response.’
‘You’re a fucking pig.’ I spat, hitting him right in the face.
His body tensed as he wiped the spit with his free hand, and then that grin widened. ‘I will keep dosing you until you answer me, and believe me, Acacia, you will beg for death.’
The meltdown I was about to have, told me I was already pretty close to begging. I grit my teeth swallowing the blood in my mouth.
He smiled, showing all his teeth.
A quick, brutal punch landed on my stomach, winding me. Somehow, I was still upright.
I let out a muffled cry, and another fist met my ribs and I heard the crack before the pain registered.
‘What has he been doing? How are you able to fight the Serum?’
This time, I grinned. ‘Because I’m the Divine Fucking Sensitive. You should know.’
His eyes narrowed in anger but before he could make another attempt for my face, the door to the office swung open, breaking off its hinges and in a heartbeat, Daniel was on him. He threw his arms around his father’s neck and pulled him backward, off me.
Damn it, the Serum was taking hold. I could barely see straight and as I tried to grab hold of the doorframe, I dropped.
Through blurry eyes, I looked up at the scene unfolding before me. This was it. This is how I die. The thought kept repeating, over and over, until I was curled up on the floor, trying desperately to stay awake.
Daniel wasn’t giving up, he fought hard against his father, his upper hand was his height and his strength, but his father’s was the skill I knew he had in hand to hand combat. He kicked my ass at the warehouse, and I was damn good.
He threw Daniel into the wall, smashing a framed picture sending the shards of glass all over me. Daniel recovered and reached for his legs, kicking out at his father’s knees until a loud pop signaled the shattering of a kneecap.
Grabbing my he
ad, I desperately tried to stop the pain. The dose was too high, too much in a short time. This was going to kill me. Panic set in and my vision dimmed.
‘Daniel.’ I managed a whimper, folding in on myself as convulsions began to rock my body.
From the corner of my eye Daniel looked at me, horror flashed across his wide eyes, we were in trouble.
A single, ballsy move was all it took. He launched his foot into his father’s face, already injured, he dropped but he wouldn’t be out for long.
Daniel moved toward me, without a second to spare, he pulled me up into his arms and ran. At some point, before I blacked out, I saw him steal a set of keys and then we were gone. Out into the sun I felt the light on my face again. I smiled; we were finally free.
***
Darkness followed me as I stepped outside into the world. Dazed and confused I felt him, I felt the familiar hum draw me to him. He was so close; I could feel him now.
Tears sprung to my eyes as I let the feeling consume me. So long, I had waited so long.
I stood in the warm evening wind. I looked up to the sky, the day turned cold then blackness followed.
Storm clouds crossed the sky opening up and releasing a downpour.
The raindrops fell in quick succession wetting me, drenching my hair. Suddenly, all the months of pain, of terror, of fear faded into the back of my mind.
A relieved sigh left my lips as I saw him. He stood a foot away, scared to move.
Slowly, his gaze found mine and time slowed down, standing still as he fell to his knees.
***
Sighing, I stretched my achy body out and pressed my hand to my face. God, I needed him. I needed Illarion so badly. I wiped the few tears that wet my eyes and turned my attention to the heat burning through my hand.
Damn it. I was burning up and nausea welled inside while I did my best to ignore the rapidly, building headache behind my eyes. A moment of panic set in until I realized I wasn’t in Dalca’s house.
Relaxing slightly, I looked around taking in the room. I’d spent more than enough nights in hotels and motels to be able to recognize which category my current room belonged to.
This was definitely a motel.
I didn’t need to look further than the small mini bar holding the TV up or the less than perfect blinds blocking out the morning rays.
Pulling myself up and out of the bed, I sat on the edge pinching the bridge of my nose.
My ears perked up as soon as a set of footsteps came closer and stepped just outside the door.
My muscles tensed in anticipation for a fight as I gripped the mattress preparing myself, but gauging my current state, I figured that I couldn’t do much even if I tried.
The pounding in my head intensified as I focused, I tried whatever I could to break through the barrier still holding me back.
It was so close, just out of reach, like a word on the tip of your tongue. As much as I tried, I couldn’t feel anything apart from the nausea and anxiety.
Daniel called out announcing that it was him and I relaxed, sinking into the mattress.
He walked in carrying two large paper bags.
‘I have food and supplies.’
‘Where are we?’
He put everything on the table and walked over to me, helping me to the kitchen.
‘Southport Motel,’ he said, taking everything out, laying the items on the table in front of us.
There were gauzes, bandages, antiseptic lotion and even a sewing kit. But my eyes fell to a bag of jelly snakes and a box of doughnuts.
‘Are you hungry?’
‘I’m starving.’
He handed me a plate with a doughnut.
‘You need to get your sugar levels up, try to eat as much as you can.’
‘What’s with the sewing stuff?’
He smirked.
‘Oh, you know, in case I get bored and feel like fixing your clothes.’
Scoffing, I gave him a mock scowl and laughed.
Returning my attention to the doughnut, I took a few careful bites, eager to feel the taste on my lips.
He watched closely, no doubt ready to throw a bucket at me.
‘How do you feel?’
Carefully taking another bite, I shrugged. The mood drastically changed. As much as we forced the light-heartedness, the underlying issues were still there, poking and prodding, reminding us whenever we dared to think of anything else.
‘I’m sorry I couldn’t get you out earlier.’
‘How bad is it?’
He bowed his head and scratched the back of his neck.
‘I don’t have any doses of the Serum with me and, to safely bring you off it, we needed to do it slowly. It’s going to be dangerous, but we’ll manage it.’ He sighed. ‘That last dose he gave you really screwed things for us.’
It was naïve of me to think that there wouldn’t be repercussions.
‘What are the odds that I’ll actually survive the detox?’
‘Ace, I don’t think that-’
‘Give me the numbers, Daniel, I know you have them.’
A heavy stillness passed between us.
‘You’re one of the smartest people I know, Daniel, I mean I’m pretty high up there but you’re a genius when it comes to this stuff.’
He sighed but nodded.
‘Knowing sucks.’
‘You’re not wrong. Tell me.’
He turned his chair, closing the gap between us.
‘At four percent, you would have needed to continue with at least a weeks’ worth of doses, slowly bringing the percentage down while alternating between that and an opioid antagonist, only then would it be safe to take you off it completely.’
He paused making sure I was following. I nodded my understanding.
‘Now… you’d need at least three weeks’ worth of doses to bring you off and I don’t have any.’
‘So, what do we do? Can’t we use the opioid antagonist like you said? Methadone, right?’
‘Yes and no.’ He shook his head looking up at me. ‘Methadone can only take you so far, the Serum can’t be replaced.’
‘Heroin is a root of the Serum; we could use that.’
Shaking his head, he stood up. ‘Not the right part, it won’t work. Now we’re weaning you off the Serum and heroin, this is going to be a lot harder than I would have liked.’
‘What about rohypnol, or sodium pentothal?’
Again, Daniel shook his head. ‘I don’t know the exact composition, and even then, I don’t know how to do that.’
‘So, what do we do?’
‘We wean you off it, slowly.’
‘Fine.’
‘It won’t be easy.’
‘I didn’t come this far to die now, whatever comes, I’ll do it. I can do it.’
He nodded. ‘You need to be prepared, Ace.’
‘I am.’
‘Right now, you’re still under the effects of both, you were dosed twice yesterday so you still feel relatively alright. When it wears off, this will be pretty shit, I’m not going to lie.’
‘I get it. Where do we start?’
He took a breath and sat down handing me a small cup with three white pills in it.
‘The two round ones are methadone, that’ll take the edge off the heroin, the other is kaopectate. It should help with the nausea.’
‘What about the Serum?’
‘We’re going to work on taking the edge off the heroin first. That’s far more potent at this stage.’
I looked at the pills for a few moments and then popped them in my mouth, washing them down with a tall glass of soda.
As the weight of everything I was about to go through settled in my veins, I realized how terrified I really was. I wanted to have Illarion by my side through this.
But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t reach him. Daniel had no idea where to find him and the only people who did know were miles away. He was miles away. And I didn’t have miles or days in me.
The mat
h wasn’t good. But there was one way I knew we could reach him, but it wasn’t an option, not when I was so weak.
Closing my eyes, I brought my feet up to the chair, hugging my knees.
‘You need to rest as much as you can, you’re safe here.’
‘I don’t know if I can sleep.’
He lowered his gaze turning away from me, taking an interest in his hands.
‘I’m sorry.’
I shook my head and got up. ‘Don’t be, you got me out.’
He gave me a weak smile and eventually got to his feet, leaving me to sleep. I moved to the bedroom and collapsed into the sheets. Minutes turned into hours as I tossed and turned in the small bed, finally my body gave in and I felt sleep come over me.
Chapter Eight
Ace
My eyes shot open as another night of violent dreams rocked me. My hand jack-knifed into the air desperate to fight off the terrors haunting me but it hit nothing.
Pressing my hand across my heart, I took several deep breaths until I managed to realign my breathing with my heart. I turned my head and my eyes fell on Daniel. He was by my side. Somehow, I’d made it to the couch at some point in the night and he sat with his back to me, sleeping in an awkward position.
My soul had been brutally tortured. I was broken, completely shattered. Fragments of what used to be me, curled up deep inside, locked away where none of the pain could reach me.
I dropped to my knees, falling off the greying couch. With whatever strength I managed, I crawled across the floor and buried my head in the black bucket by my side. I heaved and threw up all the contents of my stomach. Immediate tears sprung to the back of my eyes and burned like a reminder that yes, I was just a human and I could easily suffer and die just like everyone else.
A soft, gentle hand rubbed my back and pulled my hair away from my face. I heard the tired sigh leave his lips.
He was mumbling what should have been soothing words, but they weren’t doing much to make me feel better. Detoxing was one of the worst things a person could go through, especially after months and months of subjection to the same, potent drugs.
I was addicted, but not only by my own will and definitely not just your usual run-of-the-mill drug. No, this was much worse than anything the non-Sensitives created out of boredom and self-destructive tendencies. It was the Serum that people like us used to subdue Collectors. It was used to block off all the abilities we had through our Evolved Sense so you weren’t able to reach out for help through any connections you may have made.
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