“Hold still.” His voice was hoarse. “Please, Lauren. Just don’t…don’t move.”
“All right,” she whispered, nodding. She had no idea why he had to be in such complete control but it was his first time doing anything like this, so she supposed she could cut him some slack.
Still, it was incredibly hard to just stand there and watch as he sucked her other nipple as deeply and fiercely as the first. She wanted to move against him, wanted to press closer and feel his big body, hard against her own. She could feel her pussy getting wet and hot under her tight jeans. Getting ready for him. The long weeks of sexual tension between them were finally coming to a head and she wanted him so badly.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured hoarsely, looking up at last. “I want to see more of you. All of you.”
“We…we can do that,” Lauren said breathlessly. “You’ll have to let me go if you want me to take my jeans off, though.”
His eyes glowed red-on-black briefly. “I’ll undress you.”
Without waiting for an answer, he unfastened her jeans and pulled down the zipper with a low, purring sound. Lauren bit her lip as her pink cotton bikini panties came into view. She’d been so glad to get back into her regular clothes as soon as they came back to Earth. Now she was just as eager to get them off.
Xairn pushed the jeans down until she could step out of them. Then, when she was naked except for her panties, he pressed his cheek against the small pink triangle covering her pussy and inhaled deeply. When he looked up at her, his eyes were red-on-black again. “Your scent…You smell so good.” His voice was hoarse with emotion—with need. One large had slid up her thigh to cup her mound carefully. “I want to see you here. Want to spread open your pussy and explore you.”
Lauren’s breath caught in her throat. “Do it, then,” she whispered. “Go on, Xairn. I…I want you to.”
Slowly, he pushed the little pink panties down, baring her completely. Lauren was glad she’d taken a shower as soon as they got home. She’d taken the opportunity to do a little personal grooming and now the soft patch of black curls that covered the mound of her pussy was neatly trimmed.
“Spread your legs,” Xairn said and it wasn’t a request.
Feeling suddenly shy, Lauren did as he asked. Was she the first woman Xairn had ever seen this way? Was she going to be the standard by which he judged all other women in the future?
“There won’t be any other women,” he murmured hoarsely. “Just you. Only you, now and forever, Lauren.”
Did I say that out loud? Lust was clouding her brain, making it hard to think. She must have said it instead of thinking it though, because there was no way Xairn could read minds. That would make him way too much like the AllFather for comfort.
“So beautiful,” he whispered, running both hands up her thighs until Lauren shivered. His hands came to a stop on her pelvis, his thumbs framing her pussy. “I want to touch you here,” he said, looking up at her. “But I don’t know how.”
“Just be gentle. You’ll do fine…more than fine,” Lauren tried to tell him but he shook his head.
“I want you to show me. Lay on the bed and spread your legs. Show me how you like to be touched.”
Lauren felt her cheeks getting hot. “You’re serious? You want me to…to touch myself in front of you?” It was something she regarded as private—off limits. Something she’d never done with a lover before. But Xairn didn’t seem willing to take no for an answer.
“Show me,” he insisted. His big hands slid up her thighs to her arms and he took her by the shoulders and looked at her intently. “Show me how to touch you, Lauren. Show me how to make you come.”
His eyes flickered red-on-black again and the raw need in his voice made her shiver. “All…all right,” she whispered. “But I’ve never done this before when anyone was watching.” Feeling awkward, she climbed on the bed beside him and then lay back, resting against the pillows.
“Spread your legs,” Xairn commanded. “I want to see you—all of you.” Something about the demanding tone of his voice made her feel wet and hot and swollen between her thighs.
Heart pounding, Lauren, parted her thighs obediently, letting him see.
“Good.” His voice was a soft growl. “Now spread your pussy open for me. Let me see how wet you are.”
Hands trembling, Lauren did as he demanded. Sliding her fingers down, she opened herself for him, spreading her outer pussy lips to reveal her swollen inner folds.
“Gods.” Xairn’s voice was hoarse with need. “You’re drenched, Lauren.”
“Can’t help it.” Lauren was blushing so hard she felt like her cheeks were going to catch fire. “The way you sucked me…sucked my nipples…It made me want you.”
“I want you too, but not yet. Slowly,” he cautioned. “Show me first. Show me what feels good.”
“This…” Feeling hot and cold all over, Lauren slid two fingers into her pussy. Slowly, she stroked the sensitive side of her clit, caressing the little bundle of nerves gently as Xairn watched her give herself pleasure.
He watched intently for a long time as Lauren continued to touch herself. She tried not to moan but she couldn’t quite help it. It wasn’t just the pleasure she was giving herself that turned her on, it was the forbidden act of touching herself while he watched. And even more than that, she liked look on his face, the open desire as he watched her fingertips slide over and around her sensitive button again and again.
But just as she was getting close, the pleasure tightening in her belly like a wire, he suddenly grabbed her wrist. “Stop.”
“What?” Lauren looked at him uncertainly. “Is there a problem?”
“No problem.” His eyes flashed again and he lifted her hand to his mouth. “Gods, your scent is sweet. Let’s see if you taste as good as you smell.”
Lauren bit back a moan as he slipped her fingers into his mouth and began to suck and lick, cleaning away her juices carefully with his tongue. When he was finished, he looked at her. “I want to try it—try touching you. But I don’t want to kneel over you. I want you against me. Like this.”
He sat beside her, his back to the headboard, and indicated the spot between his spread thighs. “Sit here. Lean back against me so I can touch you.”
Lauren did as he said without hesitation. She was glad he didn’t want to keep his distance while he touched her—she liked the feeling of being surrounded by his big, masculine frame.
“Good.” He arranged her against him so that her back was to his broad, bare chest. Then both of his large, warm hands began to explore. “Forgive me for taking my time,” Xairn whispered, his hot breath in her ear making her shiver. “I need to be careful and I want to enjoy your beautiful body for as long as I can.”
“N-no rush,” Lauren stuttered. She bit back a moan as he stroked her all over, his hands exploring her shoulders, arms, sides, hips, and legs, before finally making their way back to her inner thighs.
“Now open your legs again,” he commanded. “Spread wide for me, Lauren. I need to touch you. Need to make you come.”
Lauren moaned breathlessly as she felt his big hand cupping her pussy mound. By now she was so hot and wet her outer lips were opening of their own accord. God, she needed him! Needed him so badly.
“I need you too,” he whispered hoarsely in her ear. “But I have to take this slowly. Please understand.”
“It’s all right,” Lauren assured him again. And then his big fingers slid into her pussy.
Lauren had expected him to thrust deep in her channel right away. Instead, he was gentle—almost tender as he stroked delicately over her wet folds.
“Like this?” he murmured in her ear, the pad of his index finger tracing the shape of her aching bud. “Gently but firmly, right?”
“That’s perfect,” she gasped as his finger continued to slip slowly over her clit. It felt amazing but it was slow, exquisite torture to lie back against him, her legs spread as he explored her pussy with his finger
s. The pleasure which had begun building the moment he sucked her nipple into his mouth, blossomed within her. “God, Xairn,” she whispered. “Oh, God…”
“Do you like this?” he whispered roughly in her ear. “You like it when I pet your pussy, Lauren? When I stroke your soft little cunt?”
Dirty talk wasn’t what she’d expected of him but a quick glance up at his face showed that he was serious. He really wanted to know if she enjoyed the way he was touching her.
“Yes,” she whispered, daring to move her hips a little bit. “God, yes, it feels so good.”
“I want to make you come,” he growled, his finger moving a little faster. “And then I want to put my fingers all the way inside you and fuck you with them. I want to feel you clench around me.”
His deep voice in her ear was making her almost as hot as his fingers in her pussy. “I…I want that too,” she admitted softly.
“Then you like the way I touch you? It brings you pleasure and not pain?”
“Lots of pleasure,” Lauren assured him. “You…you’re doing great for your first time.”
“I am glad you enjoy my touch,” he murmured. “I love spreading you open and exploring your pussy. So hot and wet and soft…so utterly beautiful.”
Again Lauren felt like a wire was tightening in her belly, one that was about to snap at any moment. “I’m close,” she whispered. “God, Xairn, so close.”
“Then do it.” His fingers increased their tempo, sliding over her swollen clit even faster. “Come for me, Lauren. Let me feel you come.”
Lauren gripped handfuls of his black flight pants, hanging on for dear life as she felt herself peaking. “Xairn!” she gasped. “Oh God, Xairn!”
“That’s right—come for me.” He rubbed over he clit firmly once more and then his long, strong fingers slid lower and filled her.
Lauren cried out and arched her back, tilting her pelvis to give him better access to penetrate her. She could feel Xairn behind her. One long arm was locked around her, as though to hold her in place and his hot mouth was on her neck, kissing and sucking fiercely—marking her as his. She bucked against him, her hips moving in rhythm with his thrusting as he fucked deeply into her with his fingers.
“Mine,” he growled in her ear as she moaned and writhed against him. “You’re mine, Lauren. Mine forever.”
“Yes,” she promised breathlessly. “Yes. God, yes, Xairn. Yes.” This is it, she thought hazily as the pleasure poured over her, through her. He’s going to take me now. We’re going to make love. God, I want him inside me so badly…
“No!” Suddenly he withdrew his fingers and pushed her away from him.
“What…?” Lauren stared in surprise as he got off the bed and stalked stiffly to the bathroom.
“I’m sorry.” Xairn’s eyes blazed a steady red-on-black when he looked back at her. “But we can’t. I can’t.”
Then he went into the bathroom and Lauren heard a small clicking sound as he locked the door behind him.
* * * * *
Gods that was close. Too close! Xairn slumped against the bathroom door, one arm over his burning eyes. The feel of Lauren’s soft, naked body writhing against his own as she came in his arms had been almost too much to bear. He’d been right on the verge of snapping, of rolling her over on the bed, covering her slight, soft body with his own, and ramming his cock to the hilt in her pussy. He’d had no choice but to get away from her—to run before his urges overtook him.
Gods, he was dying for relief! He needed to release the tension inside him before he lost control and went back to the bedroom to finish what he’d started.
Xairn grimaced with mingled pain and pleasure as he rubbed a hand roughly over the hard ridge of his secondary shaft. It felt swollen and hot—throbbing for release. Because his sexual urges had been repressed for so long, he’d never had this problem before. Acting on instinct, he unfastened his pants and pushed them down, freeing his shaft.
Though the DNA alteration had changed his skin and eye color, it had left him physically intact. His secondary shaft was hard and long and his primary shaft—his bonding shaft—which forked from the top of its base, was short and inactive. Xairn was grateful that it remained unaffected by what had happened with Lauren. If his bonding shaft had been stimulated, he would have lost control completely. There was no way to deactivate it short of bonding his chosen female to him, and he had already promised himself that he would never do that to Lauren, no matter how much he wanted to.
But Gods, the way she trembled in my arms, the soft, helpless sounds she made, the way she called my name when I touched her. Her soft skin, her scent, her taste… Everything about her conspired to make him want her desperately. So much that he feared what might happen if he went back to her without releasing the burning tension inside him.
Trembling, Xairn took his secondary shaft in one hand. The first stroke was agony—his skin was too sensitized and his body needed a softer, female touch. Scourge didn’t typically relieve their own sexual needs in this way. As soon as they became sexually mature they either took a female, or died fighting to get one. But though Xairn had a willing female waiting for him in the next room, he didn’t dare to go to her. Didn’t dare to touch her until some of his sexual tension had been released.
Gritting his teeth, Xairn stroked again. His hips bucked involuntarily, his body protesting the rough pleasure he was giving himself. Every instinct inside him cried out that he needed a female’s touch—Lauren’s touch—but he forced himself to stay in the small bathroom and not go to her. Forced himself to keep stroking. Gods, it hurt! But not as much as forcing her would. Not as much as seeing the hurt, betrayed look in her eyes after he took her in the fashion of his people.
Lauren, Gods, I love you so much. Want you so much…too much. Xairn raised his other hand to his face—the hand he’d touched her with. Her warm, delicious scent filled his senses, somehow easing the pain of his self pleasuring. Xairn felt his heart fist in his chest—even when she wasn’t with him she helped him.
He pressed his fingers to his mouth, sucking away her sweet juices, taking comfort in her taste. She was so beautiful, so sweet and kind and good. Too good for one such as him. And yet Xairn knew he couldn’t let her go. No matter how wrong or dangerous it was for him to stay with her, he needed her. Needed her badly.
Picturing her in his arms, remembering how she had sobbed his name in pleasure, and tasting her sweet juices finally brought about his own painful climax. Xairn groaned her name and winced as the pearly white cum jetted from the tip of his secondary shaft, calming his need at last.
Panting, he slumped against the bathroom wall. He was grateful that the tension had been released, but touching himself rather than having a female touch him was an agonizing experience. Still, he realized, it was something he would probably have to repeat over and over if he wanted to stay with Lauren without hurting her.
Worth it, he told himself, cleaning up and refastening his flight pants. If it keeps me from taking her, from forcing her, then the pain is worth it a thousand times.
Taking a deep breath, he glanced at himself in the mirror. His eyes were normal—well, what was normal after having his DNA altered, anyway. They seemed to be a very peculiar shade of bluish green but Lauren thought them quite beautiful, which was all that mattered to him. It did bother him that they’d gotten so hot while he was touching her—which was when Lauren had said they’d gone back to their original color, too. Slk had warned him that his Scourge DNA might resurface under circumstances of extreme emotional duress. Was that what was happening?
It must not happen, Xairn told himself almost desperately. He sensed that whatever tenuous control he had over his sexual urges was linked to the human DNA he had gotten from Lauren. If he reverted back to his Scourge form completely, he would lose the small edge that allowed him to hold himself back, that kept him from hurting her. Even with the human DNA he was having a difficult time restraining himself. Without it, he would have no chance
at all.
He looked at his eyes more closely. They went back to normal after my tension was released, he thought, frowning at his reflection. Perhaps his eyes flickering back to their old color was just a side effect of doing anything sexual. Maybe he had nothing to fear. Xairn hoped so, anyway.
There was one other thing that bothered him, though—he’d been able to hear her thoughts several times as he touched her. That wasn’t right or normal. Though he had wished for it many times, he and Lauren had no mental connection like the Kindred had with their brides because they weren’t bonded. The only other person he knew who could read minds and pluck thoughts from the brains of others was his father—the AllFather.
No, Xairn told himself firmly. No, I’m not like him. I don’t have his abilities or his perversions. I refuse to believe it. I want nothing to do with him, ever again.
It was time to face Lauren and try to explain why he’d run from her. Pushing his father out of his mind and squaring his shoulders, he turned the doorknob and went back into the bedroom.
* * * * *
Lauren heard the bathroom door open and the light shut off but she didn’t turn around to look at him. She didn’t want him to see the disappointment and hurt in her eyes. Didn’t want him to know how painful it had been to lie there on the bed, abandoned, while he took care of himself rather than making love to her.
She lay on top of the covers but she’d put back on her t-shirt and panties, not because she was cold but because she felt exposed without them. It was one thing to let Xairn see her naked while they were being intimate but she still wasn’t comfortable enough in her skin to run around in her birthday suit 24-7. Even back on the Fathership when she’d had no choice about her nudity she had always tried to cover herself, at least until Xairn gave her his cloak.
She’d turned off the lights and she didn’t offer to turn them back on as he made his way to the bed. There was enough illumination coming from the long, high window that ran the entire length of the condo’s west wall for Xairn to see where he was going.
Brides of the Kindred Volume One Page 146